She's Not There
by Wylis
Summary: After a 1000 years he knew not all stories were fairy tales and not all ever afters were happy, but when Sookie chooses forever with Eric he learns your fondest dream can become your greatest nightmare. Interrupts DitF
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N:**__ It's only been two weeks since I finished my last story but…I just can't quit you guys. So I'm starting a new one. This one interrupts "Dead in the Family" and picks up right after Sookie comes home from killing Bruno and Corrina with Pam. By chapter 2 we'll be firmly in AU territory though, so if you're having a hard time remembering everything that happened in that book, don't worry! It's also a "Vampire Sookie" story. _

_Sookie becoming a Vampire is not the plot of this story but it is essential to the plot, so if you're up for such a story, I'm asking for some time in the beginning to set things up. Becoming a Vampire is something that I know very well 'real Sookie' would never do, so I want to make her decision as plausible as possible and that takes time._

_Also, I think it's obvious by now, I'm an angst addict (the first step to getting better is admitting you have a problem, right?). So this story will be__** heavy**__ on the angst, but I promise there's a happy ending. _

_I have to say a HUGE thank you and give major props to two fabulous women: __**Sheknitsnicely **__and __**Northman Maille**__! They both deserve unreserved praise for polishing this first chapter till it shined!_

_On a final note: I'm planning on posting regularly with this story, every Tuesday._

_Happy Valentine's Day!_

_**Disclaimer**__: I own nothing…_

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In the annals of Sookie Stackhouse's greatest showers, this one wouldn't even be worth a mention. It was strange, given that she'd been so cold when she'd walked into the bathroom. She'd stripped off her sodden, mud spattered blouse and skirt, trying not to worry that the mud and finally dead Vampire would never ever come out of the once pretty white blouse. She only hoped it would passably blend into the red skirt.

The water was undeniably hot. One of the clear blessings of taking a shower in the middle of the night, was she didn't have to contend with her cousin for primacy over the house's ancient hot water heater. And yet, though the water and steam warmed her soaked through, goose bumped skin, it somehow didn't quite penetrate to her bones, which still felt chilled and miserable.

Pam said it had all been worth it, if for no other reason than that they were still alive, but Sookie had begun to wonder, if things kept going the way they had been the last few years, how much longer she'd get to use that as a rationalization. Eventually the house always won, and she'd been gambling with her continued existence, like an addict, for far too long already.

Turning the water off, realizing there was no point in wasting it, since it had no hope of calming her, cleaning her conscience or washing away her memories of the last two hours, Sookie took hold of a fluffy towel and dried off quickly.

Ten minutes later, dressed in her snuggliest flannel pajamas and covered to the chin, with every spare quilt and blanket at her disposal, Sookie lay in her bed. As she looked out the window at the moonlight, still unable to turn off her brain, she let the images of the last few hours run through her head for the umpteenth time. Bruno and Corrina had tried to kill her and Pam: Bruno and Corrina were dead instead. Pam had said it was for the best.

It _was_ for the best. It was for the _best_. Her mind replayed Pam's parting words over and over again but, like the warm water and the snuggly blankets, they brought her conscience zero warmth or comfort.

Any normal person…any sane person, would have gotten out of Dodge long ago, the angel on her shoulder told her, matter-of-factly. Or maybe it was the devil speaking, since someone (she couldn't be sure who at this point) on her other shoulder was quick to point out that there was no way out now. There hadn't been since the moment she naively admitted to Bill, with stars in her eyes, that she wasn't crazy, as everyone around here thought. She was a telepath.

Vampires knew of her existence. Massive swaths of Vampire knew of her existence. Even if Eric could somehow magically produce a cure for their blood bond, and would willingly sign on the dotted line of their divorce papers (were there divorce papers in a Vampire marriage? They'd certainly never gotten a license or had a ceremony… or anything really.), there was still Felipe DeCastro who would probably want her, maybe Russell Edgington too. And Victor Madden would probably still want her dead, if for no other reason than he didn't seem like the kind of guy to let something go once he'd set his mind to it. And goodness only knew who else would swoop in to try and claim her.

She doubted any of those Vampires' actions would be tempered by the love and the genuine affection she and Eric had built their strange relationship on. No, maybe logic and common sense wouldn't lead someone to try and get out, maybe that was just panic and cowardice talking.

As Sookie tossed and turned under the covers, another thought presented itself, one she wasn't sure she liked much more than contemplations of her inevitable early, and bloody demise.

Did she really want Eric to give her up?

Hadn't they just, this very night, admitted (sort of, anyway) that they loved each other? Did she love him? She'd hedged away from admitting it outright, even when he'd plainly declared himself, boldly proving, once again, that the reserved, outwardly cold, thousand year old Vampire was somehow still more emotionally brave than she was.

"Oh God." She heard herself moan and, for once, those words coupled with thoughts of Eric weren't the sound of passion. It was more…terror than anything else, and for one reason and one reason only. It had just hit her, like a ton of bricks, like Bruno slamming into her and gripping her by the throat. And just like Bruno's assault, it left her gasping for air and clutching at the still tender and bruised skin of her neck.

_Yes._

Yes, she did love him. No, she didn't want him to let her go. She loved him. She loved Eric. She was in love with Eric. And yet, if they somehow outlived Victor and managed to get him before he got them, there would always be someone else and then someone else after them. Maybe it was the morbid atmosphere of the night, but somehow Sookie just couldn't see it ending and even if it did, even if she, by the grace of God, lived to be a very old woman, dying in a moment of peace in her bed, what then? Would Eric be there at the end to hold her hand?

Could she really see him staying with her until the hand of death parted them? He'd be strong, young and beautiful: twenty-four forever. Would he be willing to stand by her as she aged, as she wrinkled and hunched over and slowed down? Would he be faithful when she couldn't satisfy his needs any longer, and still look on her with genuine love when she could no longer inspire his desire?

Or would he just leave? Would he go back to the life he'd lived before, fucking and feeding on anything that came his way? Would he shrug his shoulders in apathy when someone bothered to remind him of his bonded who still lived, barely, but whom he didn't wish to remember? Or worse, would he stay but no longer be able to love her? Would he lie to her with his lips, even as the bond whispered to her the truth of his cooling affections? Would he be there for her last breath, holding her hand and telling her how much he she meant to him, while she felt the eagerness inside of him to be finally free… finally rid of her?

Her ever spiraling thoughts combined with her exhaustion, and the low from her adrenaline rush only hours earlier, becoming one huge chemical reaction within her and suddenly the floodgates of Sookie's tears opened wide.

She didn't know how long she cried in her bed, terrified over the now undeniable proof that Victor intended to kill them, over her worries for herself and for Eric, and for Pam, and for all the Vampires who were depending on him to keep them from finally dying. Especially over her worries for a future that she might not even have.

And yet, through all her tears, two things seemed to batter at her brain over and over again, unrelenting and unwilling to let her completely give in to her self-pity. The first was that she was in no way, under no circumstances, ready to die. She'd lived through a lot in the last few years: the death of her Gran. Her rape, near-draining and betrayal by Bill, the bombing in Rhodes, the coup, her torture by the water Fairies and so many petty murder attempts that scenes like tonight had become more the 'wash, rinse, repeat' of her life rather than the deeply disturbing surprise it would have been to a normal person. And still none of it had broken her. None of it had destroyed her.

Of it all, the Fairies had come the closest, but she was still here. She still wanted to be here. She wasn't ready to lie down and die, not yet and not for a long, long time! And she sure as heck wasn't going to let it happen at the hands of such a mediocre excuse for a villain as Victor.

The other was that she couldn't turn back from, ignore, or erase the truth she had finally given into tonight, here in the very bed where he'd taken her so many times already. She loved Eric. The real Eric, the whole Eric, not just the sweet, almost Human man, she'd sheltered in this same house just the year before.

She loved the Eric who'd sat and listened to her tonight. She loved the Eric who made time in his busy evening because she'd said she needed to talk to him right away. She loved the Eric who'd admitted, without fear, that he loved her. The one who told her he thought about her, dreamed of her incessantly while, the entire time, bringing her more pleasure with just his finger tips and his voice than either of her other lovers ever had, when she'd given them everything. She loved the Eric who'd been so crazed with worry for her that he'd been willing to drive to the scene of the murder tonight, without a thought to the consequences, just to see for himself she was alive and mostly uninjured.

He was both the Eric who'd infuriated, annoyed and intrigued her throughout the (now painful to remember) months of her courtship with Bill, and the Eric who'd loved her so completely and totally, who'd made her feel so cared for and so important, without even understanding that his actions had been the actions of love. He was more complicated than his amnesia self, and more open than the Vampire she'd first met. He was a combination, and a perfect compilation of them both, and she was finally tired of trying to deny it.

She loved him. She wanted him. She might never be happy about all the things he'd done to get them to this point (from the high handed to the downright deceptive), but she was done playing games with him, and with herself, about it. Life was too short.

And yet, even as Sookie let the thought truly sink into her system, she couldn't quiet the nagging doubts that had started her torrential downpour of tears. She'd believed Eric when he'd said he loved her earlier in the night, but loving her now didn't mean he'd love her twenty years from now (if she even lived that long).

Looking at the clock on her nightstand and then out at the sky, she nodded her head and picked up her phone, determined not to back down from her sudden burst of bravery. Sookie could feel deep down, to those still chilled bones, there were big decisions that needed to be made in the near future: decisions about how involved she wanted to be in Victor's imminent demise. Decisions about whether or not to accept her marriage to Eric and his place in her life, decisions about where she would live, where she would work… who she would be.

The world she found herself living in was too dangerous for her to keep straddling the fence the way she had been for so long, putting off making any big choices for fear of getting hurt. But she couldn't make the _right _choices if she didn't have all the facts. There was only one person she knew that could answer her questions and would give it to her straight, no bullshit, no deflection and no worry for her tender, Human sensibilities.

"Sookie, it's four thirty in the morning, is everything all right? What are you doing still awake? Dear Abby says it's very important for Humans to take care of themselves during stressful times and that sleep is an essential part of Human health." Pam's voice was pragmatic in the extreme, even while her words were caring and affectionate. It was part of the mystery that was Pam. Deep down, Sookie knew Pam cared. She just also knew that Pam (much like her maker) didn't always hit the mark when it came to showing it.

"I'm okay Pam, really." Sookie croaked out, not knowing if the sound was caused by her bruised throat or her bruised emotions, but hoping Pam would believe it was the former and not the latter.

"You don't sound alright. Nor would you be calling at this hour if you were. What's wrong?" Sookie had been so determined, not five minutes ago, to find out the answers to her questions, but now that she had Pam on the line she wondered if this was such a good idea after all.

Shouldn't she be asking Eric these questions? Without realizing it, Sookie snorted audibly. Yes, she should be asking Eric. But given that they'd needed to have their fingers and mouths buried 'private parts' deep tonight just to sort of, maybe, kinda admit they loved each other, she knew the likelihood of getting a straight answer from him, to the very hard question she needed to ask, was unlikely.

Especially before dawn.

They'd never been good at the whole 'mutual, open and honest communication' thing couples were supposed to build lasting relationships on. They'd always been much better at the grand gestures, begrudgingly cryptic admittances and ecstatic orgasms that bound them together in a unique love, even if they could barely own up to it out loud. Which brought her back to the reason for cornering Pam, and not Eric.

Pam was privy to pretty much all of Eric's emotions, understood him possibly better than he did himself, had already stated tonight that she had no idea if Sookie and Eric were better off apart than together (and therefore wouldn't be biased in any particular direction). Pam being Pam, would have no compunction about answering, with brutal honesty, any question Sookie put to her. All of that, coupled with Sookie's own inherent cowardice when it came to her feelings for the Viking, made Pam her only viable option.

"Pam, you know before… ." Before we killed two people and ditched their car, seemed too straightforward for a near dawn phone conversation, so Sookie bit back the words before they could fall from her mouth, "… before we got out of the car, how we were talking about Eric and me?" She answered instead, her voice suddenly soft and timid. Pam's first reaction was a put upon sigh.

"Of course I remember, Sookie. I am a Vampire, I have perfect recall."

Sookie mentally lectured herself to stay on the rails when every fiber of her being wanted to put off her question by biting back with a sarcastic reply of her own. Maybe she and Pam could trade snark until the sun forced Pam to die for the day, making the conversation she'd called to have impossible. Forcing down her instinctive desire to run from the issue, Sookie pulled up her big girl pants.

"Yes, I know Pam. The thing is… I need to know something and you're one of only two people who can answer me. Given the way things have been going for us, I need the answer straight, quick and dirty and I thought you'd be the only one who'd give it to me that way." The snort that came through the phone made Sookie realize exactly what she'd said.

"My lovely telepathic friend, if you've finally come to your senses I'll be willing to give 'it' to you any way you'd like."

Sookie couldn't exactly be mad. She had known, the second the words were out of her mouth, how Pam would reply.

"Please Pam, I'm serious." She pleaded, pathetically. From the other end she heard her…friend subtly readjust the phone and, when Pam spoke again, her voice was almost contrite.

"I know you are. What did you need to ask me?" Pam answered, serious for the first time since she'd picked up the phone.

"Pam, does he love me? What I mean is, does he love me enough to stay, even when I get old and gray, or will he leave me as soon as the wrinkles start forming?" The line was silent for long enough that Sookie worried the storm that still raged outside might somehow have cut the phone line, but just when she was about to call Pam's name, the Vampire answered.

"Sookie, we never had this conversation, do you understand me? What I tell you, it never gets repeated to another being, living or un-living." Sookie nodded her head instinctively, then remembered she probably had to speak, even if Pam had somehow heard the rubbing of her face against the phone, with her heightened sense.

"I promise, Pam, I just need to know. With everything that's happening around us, I need to know." There was another long silence and then Pam's voice came across the receiver, low and almost hurt sounding.

"He loves you, Sookie. If you would let him, if you would stop pushing him away and putting him off, he will love you like no other has ever been loved, and he will continue to love you long after you stop drawing breath. Whether that's five years from now or five decades from now, he will still love you." Pam's words were like a freight train hitting her square in the chest.

She supposed, in her usual way, she'd been deluding herself into believing Pam would tell her that Eric would leave her. That his 'love' was nothing more than lust and fascination and that it would wear off long before her looks started to fade. But then, she'd always had a way of underestimating him… and herself.

It was what she needed to hear to really be able to make the decisions she now saw in front of her, but Pam's words had brought another question to the forefront, one she hadn't considered before.

"Pam, what will happen to him when I die?" The question was so softly spoken that, if Pam had been anything but a Vampire, she never would have heard it.

"Sookie, don't ask questions you don't want the answer to." Pam volleyed back with more feeling than she could ever remember Eric's child displaying. The words had an almost venomous sting to them.

"Pam, I'm not asking to ask. Please, I need to know. If I stay with Eric, if I let myself love him and be with him completely, what happens when I die?" This time, Pam's words came quick and emotionless, but Sookie knew it made them all the more true. She said them quickly, because the very thought of them caused her too much pain. Pam was ripping them out of her mouth the same way someone would rip a band aid off a still open wound.

"He'll go insane and get himself killed by one of his enemies or he'll take the easier route for all of us and meet the sun. I don't see it ending any other way."

In the morning, when Sookie woke up, she couldn't really say that she remembered falling asleep, or even hanging up the phone. She had no idea how she had ended her pre-dawn interrogation of Pam either. Had she simply hung up, rudely, without even saying thank you or goodbye? Or had they made pointless chit chat for a few minutes before disconnecting? All she remembered clearly was the image of Eric, in her restless dream, blood tears streaming down his beautiful face as he turned into the dawn for the first and last time in a thousand years.


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N:**__ Oh gosh, thank you guys so much for the truly humbling response to the first chapter. I'm feeling the pressure to make this one good for y'all in gratitude. I thought Eric could help me with that so he's in this one and bringing sexy along with him. (He knows what he's good for!)_

_Big HUGE thanks to __**Northman Maille**__ and __**Sheknitsnicely**__ for beta'ing this baby till it glowed!_

_Also, I want to thank a wonderful fellow fanfic writer and friend of mine __**Hippychik**__. I was feeling very… trepidatous about writing this story and kept putting it off. It was her encouragement that finally got my butt in gear. So if at any point you're feeling the drag from all this angst check out her ongoing series about Eric and Sookie. Her latest installment is __**Dead Trouble in Little Shreveport **__it's uplifting, fun and angst-lite! _

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…._

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When Sookie walked into Merlotte's just after eleven o'clock, she couldn't say her morose mood had improved much, but she hoped just being back among the living for a little while might help things. It was a short lived aspiration.

"Hey Sookie, are you okay? You look like hell warmed over."

They were the first words out of Sam's mouth when he'd looked up from polishing the bar to see her walking through the door, and they definitely reinforced the tone for her day.

She'd bantered back and forth with Sam a little while they'd done all the last minute things that needed doing before the bar opened for lunch at one, or as much as she could on what little sleep she'd had and with her brain mostly a million miles away. She'd tried to gloss over the event s of the previous evening, the one's that had left her looking like warmed death, according to her boss, and to also seem excited for Sam when he told her all about his new girlfriend, Janalynn.

Truly, she was happy for him. He'd been so in love with her at one point that Sookie had felt bad for not returning his feelings. But the fact was, as much as Sam might have been a safer choice for her than any one of her three lovers, there had never been anything there beyond a base acknowledgement that he was a handsome man. There was just no spark, their one kiss had proved that. It had been nice and, at the time, she remembered thinking that she wouldn't mind doing it again, but somehow again never happened.

She'd kissed Eric for the first time when she'd still been with Bill and, despite the fact that she'd told herself, repeatedly and firmly, it should _**NEVER happen**_ again, it just kept happening. It was proof that your heart led you where it wanted to go, even without the consent of your head.

Her heart had been leading her to Eric for a long time, but the old adage had proved true: you could bring a horse to water, but you couldn't make it drink. She'd been at the watering hole for a long time now but it was just last night she'd realized she wanted to drink…from that pool and no other, if she could have her choice.

So, knowing that she was happy, she tried to put on a smiling, if tired, face for Sam and congratulate him (even if she did think the only charms Janalynn possessed were the kind you could buy from the Hoodoo ladies in the swamps).

The rest of her shift plodded by on tired legs as Sookie attempted to keep moving and keep her attention on her customers, while her brain kept betraying her good intentions, swirling around the events of the night before instead.

She almost felt bad for thinking more about the conversation she'd had with Pam than about the fact that they'd killed two people and then hid the corroborating evidence in a ditch an hour south of Bon Temps. She supposed it was hypocritical though to feel bad about offing Victor's hench Vamps when earlier in the same night she'd been sitting with Pam and Eric preliminarily premeditating another murder (one with Victor's name all over it).

No. Instead she'd been incessantly contemplating Pam's words that Eric truly loved her and would stay with her until 'death did she depart', while serving Maxine Fortenberry her extra-large onion ring basket with ketchup, mustard and a diet coke. She thought about what would happen to Eric when she finally did check out and tried to hold back tears at the idea of the strong, beautiful Viking possibly going insane or killing himself. All the time waiting for Sheriff Dearborn to look over the menu thoroughly before ordering his cheeseburger basket, the same one he ordered every single time. She worried endlessly too about the fact that she, as a Human, was both the weakest and easiest target for Victor, or for any of their other enemies, to pick on.

It was true she'd held her own with Bruno last night, and she'd ended up the winner. It was equally true that he wasn't the first person, or even the first Vampire, she'd killed, so she couldn't shrug her shoulders and call it blind, dumb luck. But as she aged, slowed down, maybe got sick like her Aunt, her days of slaying Vampires would quickly dwindle.

If only she didn't have to grow old or die. It was almost everyone's wish at some point or another, wasn't' it, as the reality of their mortality set in?

Of course the difference was, for her, it didn't _have_ to be just a wish.

That last thought hit Sookie square in the gut just as she was pouring Andy Bellfleur another glass of sweet tea. She didn't realize, until he began to yell and curse as the tea overflowed and began running off the table and onto his lap, that it had apparently short circuited the rest of her brain.

After a profuse apology, a quick mop up of Andy and the table, and a courteous ignoring of Andy's less than gentlemanly thoughts about her and her mental capabilities, Sookie retreated to the back door for her break and, for the first time all day, was able to just sit and think about everything.

She'd never, EVER considered becoming a Vampire before, not even in the most abstract terms. With Bill it had never been a question. Despite his loud and continued protestations of eternal love, the truth was, when they'd dated, he'd never cared for her enough to have brought up the topic, even in the hypothetical sense.

With Quinn of course it was never even a concern. But with Eric…how many times had he told her, fangs down and lust burning away in his cool blue eyes, that she would make a magnificent Vampire? Hadn't she made him promise that he would never ever turn her, even if she were near death, because deep down she knew his fondest hope was that she might one day become like him?

She hadn't been deluding herself all this time. She really couldn't picture herself as anything but Human and she had a hard time seeing the upside of watching everyone she loved die, or never being able to eat or see the sun again. Now that she knew of her Fairy heritage and had met her Fairy kin she had even more reason not to consider the idea. She would want to devour her own family, her cousin and her grandfather (if she ever saw him again) and she would have to leave them behind, possibly forever.

Sookie looked up at the bright blue sky she couldn't believe she was honestly contemplating maybe never seeing again, and sighed dejectedly. There were other reasons why it was a horrible idea as well, reasons that had nothing to do with something as silly as not getting to shove a whole pecan pie in her mouth at once, whenever she was bored or depressed.

Vampires were completely at the mercy of their Makers. Anything Eric wished her to do, she would have to, whether it was as stupid as squawking like a chicken in the middle of Fangtasia or as grave as killing someone. While she couldn't imagine Eric ever commanding her to murder an innocent against her will, he had proved, in the past, that he wasn't above tricking her into something as serious or binding as say…a marriage! How much worse could it be if he didn't even have to trick her, if he could just order her instead?

Then there was the sad truth she'd learned from more than one Vampire: Makers and their children rarely stayed together forever. They barely stayed together long enough for the fledgling to have control over their bloodlust in some cases. It was true that Pam and Eric seemed to genuinely love each other and enjoy each other's company, but it wasn't like Pam was hanging off Eric's apron strings. She'd gone her own way before and probably would again.

Would it be worth all she'd lose, just to have a few years with Eric and then face eternity mostly alone? She couldn't picture herself enjoying the endless churn of the centuries while barely seeing him more than a few times a decade, if that.

And yet she couldn't put the thought out of her head. How could she willingly condemn the man she loved to the fate Pam had (grudgingly) admitted she believed he would face? How could she leave him when she had the power to stay? Her biggest fear in life, if she truly wanted to give it a name, had always been abandonment.

Her parents had died and left her. Her Gran had died and left her. Her brother lived, but he cared so little for her he might as well have been dead and gone. Bill had betrayed her, assaulted her and eventually abandoned her for his maker. Quinn had barely even been present for their relationship and, if it had continued, she had no doubt she would have been left feeling abandoned, even though she would have technically been with him. Even Eric had left her, when he'd remembered himself but forgotten their time together during his curse.

But Eric had come back to her and even when he couldn't remember what had happened between them, Sookie couldn't say he hadn't been trying, in his own way, to show her he cared. From little things like replacing her coat, to huge things like saving her from the Pelts and taking Andre's place so she wouldn't have to bond with him. So how could she, who understood the terrible aching pain of being the one left behind, do the exact same thing to him? How could she repay the love and the devotion he'd given her, that she cherished so much even at her most stubborn, by choosing fried chicken and skin cancer over him?

Looking at her watch, Sookie realized her break was over. It was time to go back inside and attempt to not drive away business with her flakiness for a few more hours. She wished she could say that her break had been productive, but she only had more questions and more depressing pessimism weighing down on her now than she'd had before.

Maybe she'd been right last night. Maybe she should have just left, gone when the going was good. But she knew that hadn't been an option for a long time now. She closed her eyes, trying to center herself before going back into the noisy bar (doubly noisy for her), and as she did so she felt the tiny, now familiar thrum of Eric's life force in the back of her brain. He'd told her once he liked having this connection to her, and that she would like it eventually too. She wasn't completely sure she could say that, but at the same time it felt…nice not to be alone, without having that presence raining down unwanted thoughts in her head. He didn't know it, tucked away in Shreveport in his daytime rest, but his steady presence was giving her the only calm she'd been able to find all day.

When her shift was finally over, Sookie handed her section over to Tanya and piled into her car. She was glad that she could basically drive herself home on autopilot because, as tired as she was, her mind hadn't let her have a second of peace yet.

The worst part of it was, after all her endless thinking and worrying, she'd only come to a single conclusion: she would have to talk to Eric. The thought of it made her a little queasy and, as she turned down Hummingbird Road, she offhandedly wondered if she had enough money in her bank account to purchase a one way plane ticket to Kashmir, or any other remote as hell place, to leave tonight.

She laughed harshly at the thought. Eric had pegged her as a runner from the very beginning, but she doubted he really understood the lengths she'd be willing to go to in pursuit of her avoidance issues.

"You promised yourself you were gonna make some real decisions, Sookie." She said to her reflection in the rearview mirror. Sighing, she turned her eyes back to the road, to make sure she didn't end up driving into the middle of the construction they were still doing at the end of her driveway.

"Yes, yes I did." Sookie answered herself, fully aware she was now having an entire conversation with her reflection. "But that doesn't mean it has to be tonight." The truth was, though it aided her avoidance, it was probably a sound choice.

She was so tired, a little sleep couldn't do anything but help clear away the fog in her brain so she could think straight. In her best Southern Belle voice, Sookie looked at herself in the rear view mirror again and proclaimed dramatically "I'll think about it all tomorrow." But as she pulled up to her farmhouse and saw the oversized figure sitting on her tiny porch swing, she knew her inner Scarlett would need to take a hike.

Before she even had the engine completely off or the parking brake up, he was by her side, opening the door and giving her his hand to help her out of the driver's seat. Once she was completely out, he engulfed her in his cool embrace. His hands banding around her middle and holding her tight to his body as his face went into her hair, breathing in what she was sure would be the smell of friend chicken, burgers, and beer. A scent he would only ever describe as sugar, honey-suckle and just a hint of candied Fairy.

"Lover." Was all he said, but through their bond she could feel him reassuring himself that she was truly alright after her brush with death the night before.

Sookie wrapped her arms around Eric's middle and let him do what he needed to do. She wouldn't lie and say that she wasn't enjoying the feeling of being in his strong arms, after her endless hours of exhaustion and mental turmoil, or the sense of warmth, calm and joy his presence always inspired since their bonding. She'd railed against these feelings many, many times, determined to blame the blood bond for them, but right now she decided that she'd be a fool to look a gift horse in the mouth. Calm and comfort was what she needed and calm and comfort was what Eric was giving her.

After a few long moments she felt Eric shift and, without warning, she found herself in his arms as he carried her up the steps to her house. She'd never admit it out loud, but she loved that he could lift and hold her so effortlessly and that his body was like a mountain, huge and strong, protecting her. It made her feel safe, cared for and secure in a way she'd never felt with any of the other men in her life. But, just as she was about to rest her head on his shoulder, she remembered Claude.

"Eric, wait! I forgot to tell you…" She was too late. Eric already had them through the front door before she could finish her thought. She could tell by the darkness of all of the rooms that Claude wasn't home but she could also tell the exact moment the lingering scent of one hundred percent pure, unadulterated Fairy hit her Vampire like a train barreling out of a tunnel.

Her Viking honey went from concerned lover, worried only for her safety and well-being, to a sex and blood starved creature of pure instinct, in less than a second. And if she knew Eric, and she did, she'd bet his instincts were, once again, telling him to bite her and fuck her and rub himself all over her.

He didn't bother to flick on the lights, he didn't bother to walk them to the bedroom, he simply looked down at her with the very last of his sanity and posed the one question that would allow free rein to his beast.

"You are unharmed?" He managed to bite out, his voice choked with lust and possessive desire.

Sookie only nodded her head, his emotions inside her so strong and overwhelming that they had obliterated both her exhaustion and her worry. All she wanted now was the frenzied pillaging she was sure was only seconds away.

"Good." Was his final word before he dumped her unceremoniously onto the couch, managing to sweep it of the back cushions as he did, so there would be enough room for them both.

Sookie had barely felt the cool softness of the couch underneath her when she felt the cool hardness of a suddenly nude Eric on top of her. She caught one fleeting glance of his burning blue eyes before his head fell to her jawline, attacking it with blunt nips and rough licks as his whole, huge, naked body began to move against her still clothed one.

"Eric." She half sighed, half moaned as his mouth met the pulse beneath her ear. She expected him to bite down, knowing he was mostly gone in his lust for both her body and her blood, but he didn't: he only licked her pulse almost gently and then continued his trail of sweet and harsh kisses.

For Eric, there wasn't much resembling coherent thought at the moment. He vaguely, in the back of his fogged mind, remembered that he should be worrying about Sookie right now. He had almost lost her last night, and had yet again been unable to go to her thanks to Victor Madden's schemes. But all he could think of was the sweet swells of her breasts, how he longed to taste them, suck them, bite them and how much he despised the flimsy pieces of cotton and lace that were between him and their perfection.

His hands made quick work of the problem, removing her shirt and bra in one lightening quick movement and then she was finally topless beneath him, the beautiful skin of her torso glowing softly in the dim illumination from the floodlights outside. Her sweet breasts, with their petal pink nipples, were now bare and rising to hard points before him, beckoning him to take them between his lips and kiss them over and over again, as they deserved.

The cry of pleasure that fell from Sookie's mouth as he closed over one of her delicious peaks only made his frenzy that much more desperate. He brought his other hand down to her black short shorts and pretty matching thong and relieved her of them with a mindless efficiency he dimly felt they'd both appreciate under the circumstance.

"Yes, oh God yes." She chanted, over and over again, as Eric worshiped her breasts with his lips, tongue and teeth.

He began to rock his hips against her rapidly soaking center, the fingers of the hand that had removed her shorts finding their way to her dripping entrance and beginning to play inside of her, even as his rock hard erection teased her clit, rubbing against it with each forceful thrust.

Sookie's first orgasm washed over her in a burst of bright, white light as Eric brought together each of the blissful elements of his assault on her body with the skill of a master. Curling the fingers inside of her, he shamelessly teased her, as he circled his hips, causing her clit to twist ever so slightly against the velvet over steel of his cock. Biting down with his fangs, he punctured the delicate flesh on either side of her nipple sucking it, and her blood, into his hungry mouth.

Eric continued to drink as Sookie came down from her high. Only when she began to breathe normally again did he retract his fangs, sealing the wound on her now tender breast, as he plunged his cock deep into her weeping entrance. Bringing the hand that had been inside her to her clit, he continued his sweet torture of her overstimulated nerves, smiling lustfully as she again began to gasp erratically for air.

They cried out together, Sookie wrapping her arms and legs around him as Eric rode her with abandon, taken by his desire for her, his need to hold her, keep her and possess her, all sweetened by the drugging essence of Fairy that permeated her home.

When the end came, they reached it together this time, and Eric held her close, his hand fisting into the back of her hair and bringing her flush against his body, as he arched rigidly, and emptied into her again and again. His cries ringing through the empty room as hers were muffled against his heart.

When it was over, he collapsed, using the last of his sense and strength to move slightly to the side, falling next to her and not on top of her. Sookie could tell that he was still affected by the lingering aroma of Fairy because he laughed in a way that was almost goofy, as he brushed his long, golden hair away from his face and looked at her with slightly unfocused eyes.

"I think you have some explaining to do, lover." He said, his voice serious even if his expression was still more along the lines of dreamy.

Sookie just looked at him, feeling exhausted, sated and overwhelmed all at the same time. He had no idea.

"I've got a lot I need to talk to you about actually. Are you staying the night or do you have to get back to Shreveport?" She asked, almost wishing he couldn't stay and had only popped by to check on her.

"You were almost killed last night. I felt that justified my taking a personal day. I'm yours until the sun rises." Sookie nodded.

Maybe he'd get distracted by the fact that she now had her very own, full-time Fairy air freshener and they'd never get around to having the other conversation. Or maybe Victor Madden's hench Vamps would somehow burst through the door and kill them both before they could put their underwear back on. Or maybe she'd just have to be a God dang grown up for once, and talk to the man who'd already told her he loved her about what, if any, kind of future they might have together.


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N:**__ I just want to thank everyone again who's taken the time to read, review, alert and favorite this story. I'm so grateful I can't express it properly! _

_So, Eric and Sookie are gonna do some talking and then it's gonna be decision time for Sookie next chapter. I wanted to make her choice seem as 'thought through' as possible but I'm dying to get to the real fun!_

_Super huge hugs and thank yous to my awesome beta __**Northman Maille**__ for cleaning this sucker up twice. You are THE BEST!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…_

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

Knowing they'd be in for a long night, Sookie decided to shelve her many questions for just long enough to run into her bedroom. Throwing on the pretty silk robe Eric had given her and getting the old Afghan which usually lived on the back of her couch, but that she'd moved into her bedroom the night before, she came back into the living room to find Eric building a fire.

She couldn't help the amused laugh that escaped her. It wasn't that cold a night and Claude, who probably had never had to worry about how he would pay for simple things like his gas or electric bills, had left the heater on before he'd gone out. The house was pretty warm already. It left her to wonder if Sookie Stackhouse wasn't the only name procrastination went by at the moment. Could Eric Northman be one of its other aliases?

When the fire was roaring Eric turned back to her, utterly beautiful in his unselfconscious nudity. The sight made her breath catch in her throat as she watched him climb back onto the couch, and under the Afghan with her. As he did he gave the old piece of crocheted wool a fond look, and Sookie knew he was remembering another night when they'd laid under it, in front of the fire.

As she looked at him, lying sideways against the back of the couch, his head resting on the arm and his own arms encircling her tightly, she realized she wasn't sad 'Amnesia Eric' wasn't here with her anymore. She would always cherish those nights with his other self but she would never mourn for them again. He had been wonderful, but he hadn't really been a person.

He was only one aspect of the real Eric. And although she'd loved getting to know that side of him so intimately, she could say without doubt, as she looked into this Eric's eyes, illuminated only by the dim light of the fire and the echo of the floodlights outside, she still saw that part of him. He was there in the goofy, slightly drunk smile Eric continued to wear. He was there in the deep, abiding affection shining out from his eyes. He was there in the hand that softly caressed the length of her arm, trying his best to soothe her, because he knew trust and confession were two things that were still difficult for her. He was there among the rest of Eric and, though the realization startled her, she found she was genuinely glad the other parts of him were present as well.

When they'd lain like that, entwined in each other's arms but still silent for a few long minutes, he leaned down and kissed her softly, his lips caressing hers with such sweetness it almost broke her heart. When they were together like this, just the two of them alone in their own little world, she found it easy to believe they could beat the odds and have eternity together. After all, it would probably take an eternity just to grow accustomed to being kissed that way.

"Should we start with why your house smells so deliciously of Fairy, Lover?" He asked, breaking into her reverie.

"I meant to tell you last night, my cousin Claude's been staying here. He's lonely at his house with both of his sisters gone." She answered him, happy to begin with the easy stuff.

"You are letting a man live with you?" Sookie could tell Eric wasn't angry… exactly. But she felt like he might have been, if he could have summoned the energy for it, if he wasn't still feeling pleasantly buzzed and therefore magnanimous from the Fairy scent-induced orgasms.

"Believe me; he's not interested in me as a woman." She reassured him, "He's all about the guys!"

That got a chuckle out of Eric and Sookie felt relieved Pam had been wrong about how he would react. Maybe Claude would loan her a handkerchief or something else of his. That way she could carry it around, ready to pull out and wave under Eric's nose, anytime she needed to tell him something potentially explosive. Was that cheating? Sookie decided it probably was, but that didn't mean she wasn't going to consider it anyway.

"I know you value your family." He said after a thoughtful moment. "And I also know you're fully aware of how to take care of a Fairy who gives you trouble." Eric added the last with a bloodthirsty smile on his face and Sookie had to stifle a guilty sigh.

She was glad he didn't want to make an issue of something as ridiculous as her gay male cousin sometimes spending the night, but that didn't mean she liked being reminded of the Fairies she'd killed, even in jest. Still when Eric looked at her solemnly and voiced his next question, she felt like she might be happy to start listing _all_ the people she'd had a hand in ending, perhaps alphabetically and maybe in song, if it bought her a few more minutes.

"What is it you wanted to talk to me about?"

_I'm thinking of letting you kill me and wanted your input _didn't seem like it would be the best lead in, even if it _was _the most direct, so Sookie took a deep breath and decided to start small and work her way up.

"Do you ever miss eating?" She asked, and from the suddenly blank look on Eric's face, she knew she'd caught him off guard. "You know…like eating food?" She clarified unnecessarily.

Blinking hard, twice, Eric tried his best not to laugh at her question, or worse yet ask if she was serious. He thanked the blood blond profusely at that moment, because it was the only way he could tell she was hedging toward something very, very big. He knew this unexpected and uncharacteristic desire to talk could evaporate behind her more usual emotional cowardice in the blink of an eye, if he made even the slightest wrong move, and so he schooled his features and decided to play along.

"No, I can't say I do. Why?" He hoped that was the right answer, and when she laughed softly, the sound like little tinkling bells, he felt a jolt of relief run through him.

"I don't know. I mean I know they probably don't make a lot of the foods you ate when you were Human, but I just wondered if you ever miss the experience of eating? If you ever wished you could enjoy one of your favorite meals again?"

Eric's first response was a shrug as he tried to put into words something that would be difficult for a Human to understand.

"It's true I haven't eaten in a very long time, but I've never missed the experience. For very young Vampires the smell of Human food is often repulsive. It's sort of like…"He hesitated for a moment worried the parallel he was about to draw would offend her, but then decided if she really wanted to know, he would tell her. "It's like dog or cat food to a Human. You know technically what you're giving them is to be consumed, but the smell of it is wrong. It in no way makes you hungry or makes you think you should put it in your mouth.

It's much the same way for Vampires. We know it's food, we remember eating it, but it smells off, instead of making us hungry. Some Vampires, like Pam and Compton don't seem to ever get over that. For others, me included, we simply become indifferent to it. It doesn't bother us to smell it or watch someone else consume it, but we don't have any desire to join in. Besides, I can't honestly say that anything I ate as a Human ever came close to causing the ecstasy I feel when I drink blood, the experience is a thousand times more satisfying." Sookie's only response was a nod of her head and Eric wished he could get just one glimpse into her thoughts, to figure out what she was driving at with her question.

"Do you miss the sun?" This time Eric couldn't help the eyebrow that shot into his hairline. She'd never asked him questions like this before. He never thought she had any interest in the minutia of being a Vampire. Looking at her intently for one long minute, he answered again.

"Yes." He replied, simply but truthfully. When she looked at him with a raised eyebrow of her own he knew she wanted more. "I don't remember much about the day the Pyramid of Gizeh was bombed so I didn't get many impressions of the day lit world other than that it was incredibly bright and it burned.

But I have vague memories of watching the sunrise over the ocean in my youth, and even though I can't really remember what it looked like, I still remember how it made me feel. I remember the sense of warmth and beauty it inspired in me, and that I miss. I have never regretted being a Vampire, and I will never be sorry for a single night of my thousand years on this earth, but if I miss anything about being a Human it would be the ability to see the sun. Sookie, what is all of this about?" He asked the last softly, his eyes imploring her to explain where this sudden curiosity came from.

He would share anything with her she wanted to know even if it was just mere curiosity that motivated her, but he already knew it wasn't and her questions felt more like beating about the bush, than any genuine inquisitiveness. The 'deer caught in the headlights' look that crossed Sookie's face at his counter question only reinforced his suspicions.

For Sookie, she knew the moment had come for her to either take the terrifying step of trusting Eric with her hopes and fears, and her uncertainty about the future, or to brush it all off and continue on as she had been… adrift. She'd been living a half-life for some time now, maybe since as far back as the night Eric tricked her into marrying him. She'd been passively accepting what life sent her, instead of actively participating in shaping her world.

She had neither accepted nor denied their marriage, choosing instead to completely ignore it and its implications. She'd let Eric back into her bed, enjoying the pleasure only his body could give her, but had adamantly avoided defining their current relationship, or discussing their time together when he was cursed and the feelings they'd had, still had, for each other. He'd become her lover again and her boyfriend more by default than by design.

She didn't know what it was about last night that abruptly pushed her into action. For anyone else it would probably have been the emotional trauma of being attacked and having to kill another person to survive, but those things had become sickeningly common occurrences in her life. The truth was she had no idea what jolted her awake, so to speak, but whatever it was, she was awake again after a very long time. Sookie realized, with a sudden eerie clarity, that if she kept on the path she was walking now she'd end up broken, hurt and alone.

Her relationship with Eric had never been perfect, and it probably never would be, but he was the one man, out of all of them, who'd always put her first. He was the one man who made her feel something deep, and real, terrifying and exhilarating. He was the one man she truly respected. His strength and his intelligence, his wisdom (even if she didn't always follow it) and his tenacity for life were undeniable. If she lived to be a thousand years old she didn't think she could do it any better than Eric had.

Sookie repeated all of those things to herself one last time, knowing Eric was waiting patiently for an answer, and then she sat up, turning slightly so that she was looking down on him. Her hands came to rest on the hard plains of his chest, maybe hoping to take some of his strength into her, even as his own arms tightened around her waist. She knew he was probably worried that she was getting ready to bolt. So locking eyes with him, she opened her mouth and willed the words to come out.

"I know I didn't really give you the most confident reply last night, but, Eric… I do love you. I do, and you're right. If what we have isn't true love then true love doesn't exist." Her words were barely above a whisper. To her ears they blended into the soft crackling sounds coming from the fire, but to Eric they were as clear as the daylight he would never see again. His reaction to them was fierce and immediate. In the time it took her heart to make a single beat she was underneath him, his entire body caging hers to the soft cushions as his mouth and hands touched her everywhere.

"My lover… my love… my Sookie!" He said over and over as his voice and their bond betrayed his overwhelming tidal wave of possessiveness, and he tried to kiss, touch and caress every part of her at once.

Sookie had always hated Vampire possessiveness before, but as she was able to not just hear it, but experience the emotions that went with it for the first time, she suddenly understood. Eric _did_ want to possess her. He wanted to take everything from her and give everything to her, all at once, but the emotion wasn't one sided. He wanted her to want him in the same way, desperately. She pushed those feelings back to him. Happy to be able to let him know, in the most honest way, that they were completely in tune with each other, right now. They were one in thought and feeling, as they had been in body just a little while before.

"I am Eric, for as long as you'll be mine too." She whispered, even as she held his head to her body, trying with all her petty Human might to keep him pressed against her. Maybe they could just spend eternity like this? She was more than willing to try.

"Then we'll be each other's forever, lover." His words held all the passion of a vow and she knew it was time lay her cards on the table.

"Would you turn me if I let you?" Sookie felt a little jolt of remorse when Eric's head shot up, his eyes suddenly painted with suspicion. She supposed that look was her doing. She'd been unfair to him in the past, often looking for reasons to blame him. He probably thought she was trying to entrap him right now, to get him to make a heartfelt admission only to berate him and push him away for it.

"Sookie," he said carefully, "we've had this conversation. I know you do not wish to become a Vampire and I have promised to respect that wish."

The words were said with nothing but honesty, but Sookie could feel the small pang of pain lancing through him, that he couldn't hide from her, and she knew Pam had been right.

Her death would affect him deeply, possibly damage him irrevocably. He'd never come right out and said it, but she knew from things both he and Pam had said that he hadn't ever loved before her. She also figured part of him hated himself for being weak enough to fall for a mortal. He felt foolhardy for opening himself to something that could only end in his own pain, whether by her death or as a means to cause his own.

"What if I was reconsidering?" Eric's face remained like stone as he digested her words, his features betraying not a single hint of what he was feeling at her revelation. But she could tell that, underneath his neutral veneer, he was quickly becoming overwhelmed by the strength it took to keep his emotions tightly leashed.

As Eric looked down on the woman he'd loved for so long he wished with everything he was that he could believe her. He wanted to hope she meant it, but he wouldn't let himself. She'd burned him before. She'd turned him away when he'd begged to know what happened between them, here in this house. She'd flaunted another man under his nose, callously telling him in a way more tangible than words that, in her eyes, he was replaceable. Even as he was coming to understand (without the help of his memories) that what she'd freed in him was something exceptional and unique, something he'd never experienced before and probably never would with another living being. Yet, up until last night she'd refused to tell him how she felt about him and denied him the right to tell her of his own feelings, too scared to accept what was truly between them.

What could have changed for her so suddenly? Why was she now willing to admit her love for him, something he'd known from their bond for longer than he would admit to her? What had happened that she'd gone from vehemently refusing to ever be anything but Human, to suddenly entertaining the thought of joining him in immortality, and giving him his fondest and most closely guarded dream?

When he'd made no response after several tense minutes Sookie knew she had to give him more.

"I'm not saying yes. But if I love you, if I want us to have a real relationship then I think it's something I need to seriously consider. And after everything that's happened to me in the last few years, it maybe couldn't hurt to be a little less…destructible." Her words didn't seem to put him at ease as she'd hoped they would and she began to worry that maybe she'd been wrong. Maybe he didn't want to keep her _literally_ forever. Maybe the first time she'd taken it off the table he'd realized he'd actually dodged a bullet. It would be a first for him actually, since where she was concerned he usually ended up taking them square in the vitals.

"Do you want a real relationship with me, Sookie?"

When she looked at him incredulously he knew that blood bond or not he'd have to be more specific. For all she often appeared to be wiser and smarter than her years, she really was very young and up until a few years ago her only remaining parental figure had kept her incredibly sheltered as well.

"I know you love me Sookie and I'm…grateful to you for being brave enough to admit it. But that still doesn't tell me what you want from me. Do you love me but still wish to continue on with things as they are? Do you want things to change between us? Are you ready to accept our…marriage?"

The last was said with such caution that Sookie was somewhat surprised. Eric was many things, but a coward wasn't one of them, and yet he'd said the word almost as though it had the power to physically wound him.

"I want things to change between us Eric. I don't have all the details figured out, but I know that I love you, I'm in love with you and I don't want to be with anyone else. I know, in some way, we are really married. I hadn't really ever thought that was in the cards for me, but I did think if it ever happened it would happen very differently. I'm still not happy you tricked me, but I understand why you did it." Eric actually looked remorseful for a moment as she took him to task for his deception.

"I'm sorry, lover. I know it was not by choice and I know it did not happen as Humans traditionally desire it, but it was necessary." She knew this already and she'd come too far to back down now from the question that was really important in all of this.

"I know that Eric. But if it hadn't been necessary would you have still married me? We were bonded, but we weren't even a couple then. Was my protection your only motivation?"

Eric's arms tightened around her and he broke eye contact with her for a moment, before lifting his head again and pinning her with eyes so wistful and sincere they couldn't be doubted.

"No, your safety was not my only motivation. I have wanted you for my own from the moment I met you Sookie, and that desire only increased as I grew to know you and eventually fell in love with you. I welcome anything that binds you more closely to me, but I'd like to think if things had been different I would have courted you, won your love and your devotion first and then your hand, willingly. But Sookie no matter how it happened, I do not regret it. You are my wife in all the ways that matter to me."

His words were beautiful, but it was the way she felt his heart clench through their bond as he said them that truly made her melt. Yes, she would accept their marriage. She really could never imagine having a man more magnificent for a husband and, even in the extremely remote possibility one did exist, she already knew she wouldn't want him when she already had her Viking.

"I love you." She told him again, her hand coming up to cup his cheek, lovingly. "But Eric, if we're really going to be together, then stuff like that can't ever happen again. I trust you with my life, but for us to work I need to be able to trust you with the rest of me too and that can't happen if you don't understand that your highhandedness will only push me away." She watched as he turned her words over in his head.

"I can only promise you I will curb my highhandedness if you will promise me to really listen to me when we, either of us, are in danger. Victor is a real and immediate threat Sookie and, even when we have killed him, there will always be someone else. Maybe not immediately, but it will happen and I need to know you will heed me. I have not survived a thousand years by luck."

Sookie knew he was right. He did have more experience at dealing with endless barrages of enemies. And while she hadn't been a slouch at defending herself, she did have a tendency to go off half-cocked and do the first thing that came into her head, with mixed results to say the least.

"From now on you tell me what's going on when it concerns our safety and well-being and in return I agree to actually listen to you and give you my input in return, rather than running off and doing whatever thing comes into my head. I can agree to that if you can, but it doesn't mean I'm going to always just automatically do what you say, Eric."

His shocked look was quickly replaced by an amused bark of laughter. Apparently he found the thought of submissive Sookie amusingly farfetched.

"I wouldn't expect you to. I would hope that from now on we will come to decisions together as pairs should. But I would never seek to rob you of your independent spirit. It's one of the things I respect most about you." She suspected it was one of the things he respected in women in general, since she couldn't imagine Pam ever fawning over Eric either, and she was the only other woman he'd ever felt strongly enough about to want to keep. No, Eric Northman didn't like submissive, sycophantic women, she already knew that and it made it all the easier to believe he wouldn't seek to try and change her.

"You still haven't answered my question though. If I were to change my mind would you want to turn me?"

The emotions that hit her this time were like a tidal wave, and she feared for a moment she would be dragged under by their strength. Love, desire, possession and joy battered her like a boat in a storm, before Eric realized he was overwhelming her and pulled back within himself. She already knew his answer and he knew she knew, so he said the only thing necessary.

"Yes!"

He bent to kiss her then, but she pulled away slightly knowing this wasn't the end of things.

"And if you turned me, then what? Would we stay together forever or would it just be a matter of time before we parted?" She turned away at that, leaving the hypnotizing pools of his eyes to concentrate on the slowly dying fire instead. It was easier to say the next words without his gaze seducing her into agreement. "I just…I couldn't bear to choose eternity for you and then end up alone watching you with one woman after another." She didn't think that Eric's grip on her could tighten anymore but she realized as she spoke she was wrong.

"Oh love." He said; his voice gentle and soothing. "Sookie, look at me." He begged her. She'd worried he'd been about to give her platitudes, to say anything necessary to get her to agree, but again she'd underestimated him. There was no deception in his answer, and she could feel he didn't even desire to deceive her.

"Lover, I wish to the god's themselves I could promise you forever, but all I can promise you is that, to share it with you is my greatest desire. The truth is no one can promise forever to another. Humans make that vow all the time and break it within the paltry space of a few years. I believe with all my heart that you are perfectly suited to life as a Vampire and I suspect that if you choose it, you would find you would not miss being a Human. But I cannot deny that few Makers and their children stay together for long.

I have known some in my years and all of them were bonded before the child was turned, so the chances are good that it could happen for us. _You_ have met some of these Vampires yourself. Sophie-Anne and her progeny were all bonded, and in each case her children chose to stay with her through the centuries. But as hopeful as that makes me, I cannot promise you something I have no control over. One of us may meet our final death and leave the other behind. You may, as you grow and mature, tire of me and decide you want your freedom. I can only give you my word that_ I_ will not want another.

What you make me feel, Sookie, fills me when I hadn't even known I was empty before. I have been many places and done much but I have never had what I have with you. I am not fickle enough to think I will find it again or foolish enough to put it in jeopardy for capricious physical pleasure with another.

I love you. I am in love with you and I will remain so until the day I cease to exist. If anyone will do the leaving between us, it will be you." Sookie felt herself beginning to drown under the weight of the huge declarations and emotions they'd shared during the night and she knew she would need time to think about all of this, alone and in depth later. She decided to simply ask her final question instead of trying to make any response to what he'd just told her.

"If I do become your child, Eric you would have complete control of me. I couldn't continue to love you if you used that against me. It's my other biggest fear." She admitted in a hurried rush and she was almost offended when she saw Eric laugh and blow out a relieved sigh, until he looked at her with smiling eyes that crinkled adorably at their ends.

"At least you've given me one easy one tonight." He said, kissing her hair quickly before answering her. "Sookie, I can promise you I will not use my power as your Maker to force you into anything. Our agreement from a few minutes ago still stands. I will tell you my thoughts and we will come to a decision together." Sookie couldn't help the eyebrow that raised into her hairline at his words.

"So you're saying you'll never use your influence over me to control me?" The smile dropped from Eric's face, but the softness in his eyes didn't.

"No, I didn't say that. There may be times when it is necessary for me to use my influence over you. For instance I assume you would not wish to drain an innocent Human simply to obtain dinner, yes?" Sookie nodded. "Young Vampires must learn how to feed just as newborns must learn to nurse. You will not automatically know when to stop feeding, and even once you learn to recognize the signs, you may still be unable to control yourself enough to stop, even though you would regret what you had done later. In instances like that, I would use my influence so you would not suffer unnecessarily.

But I would not use my influence as your Maker to force you to my will or make you do something against yours. You have my word for that Sookie, but you can also ask Pam if I've ever treated her so. I have not. And though I care for my child greatly, what I feel for you far exceeds what I feel for Pam. Why would I do something to drive you away, when you mean more to me than anyone ever has before?"

Eric could see she was thinking over his words but hadn't completely accepted them yet and so he again tried to put things in terms she would understand.

"Sookie, if you married a Human man it is most likely he would be physically stronger than you, is it not?" Again Sookie nodded at him. "But you would trust this man never to use his physical advantage to force you to his will, correct? Your friend Tara is married to a man quite a bit bigger than she, yet she trusts that, when their opinions differ, he will not get his way with his fists?"

Sookie figured it wasn't worth telling Eric that JB didn't have enough gray matter between his ears to have an opinion on most things, but even if he did he'd give into Tara anyway, just to make her happy. But she understood what he was driving at. His influence as her Maker was something like a man's physical strength. He _could_ use it, but he wouldn't, because he knew it would irreparably damage her feelings for him.

"I understand." She said, tightening her arms around him fractionally and burying her face in his chest. "Thank you for talking about all this with me. I know it wasn't easy for either of us." Eric nodded and laid a few more gentle kisses in her hair.

"I have longed to have such a discussion with you for a while now, my lover. I just wasn't expecting it to happen tonight." Sookie had to laugh, really that made two of them.

"You've given me a lot to think about. I need time." She knew, even without him saying it, that time was something they had in short supply right now, but she was more relived and grateful than she could say when he only picked her up, carrying her to her bedroom, and tucked them in together. He only left to check that the doors were locked and the fire had gone out, before returning and holding her.

"I will wait as long as necessary, love. I would wait for you forever." With those beautiful words dancing through her head and Eric's strong body wrapped around her, Sookie finally found the peace she needed to sleep.

When her eyes opened again the sun was blazing bright and beautiful through the curtains. She'd slept deeply and peacefully for hours and never woken once. It was yet another thing only Eric could give her.


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N:**__ Not much to say except a HUGE thank you to everyone who's been reviewing this story, favoriting it and putting it on alert. I'm beyond grateful to you all, truly!_

_And, of course, a GIANT thank you to my beta __**Northman Maille**__ for all her support and hard, hard work on this story! _

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing… I'm just giving Sookie two extra teeth!_

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The early April air was warm, but not quite warm enough for Sookie to slip on a bikini and work on her tan as she'd originally planned. Frowning at the thermometer hanging on the doorframe of the mud room she figured it wasn't worth wasting energy being unhappy over. The truth was she wasn't quite sure she was ready to wear one of her skimpy bathing suits yet anyway.

Even though Eric's blood helped them heal to mere echoes on her skin, she still felt self-conscious about the faded marks on her stomach and thighs. And the thought of someone other than Eric seeing them made her feel uncomfortable in the extreme. Instead she decided to take her coffee and her Gran's afghan out onto the porch swing, and enjoy the sun from there.

The late morning air was still just a tad chilly but she could tell it would be a beautiful afternoon, with the bright, warm sun streaming down from a cloudless blue sky. Looking up into the light she tried once again to sort through everything, and come to some sort of decision. Part of her still couldn't believe she was seriously contemplating never enjoying a spring morning or a cup of coffee, for that matter, ever again. The idea of becoming a Vampire still seemed odd to her even if it no longer repulsed her as it once had.

She supposed Eric was responsible for that. You couldn't hate something you loved, and in just a few short days she stopped questioning and accepted what she'd felt for Eric, for a long time now, was love. And unbelievable as it once might have seemed, he felt the same way.

As the bright morning sun made its case for her to remain Human, the scent of Eric himself drifted up to her from the afghan and argued, quite persuasively, for her to make the other choice. She knew of course that the decision wasn't really between Eric and the sun, but between him and everything the beautiful, sunny morning represented.

In becoming a Vampire she would gain great strength and at least the possibility of eternity (If she needed to be reminded that even being a Vampire was no guarantee of living forever, she could just pull out the ruined blouse that still had Bruno Brazell all over it). But she would also gain several very huge disadvantages, like only being awake for part of each day and a significantly small part of it come winter. She would be utterly and completely vulnerable during the day, and she'd gain a weakness to something as commonplace as silver.

In that regard at least, being a Vampire didn't seem like it would be a cure all for her issues. She'd still be vulnerable to an enemy, just vulnerable in different ways. But the fact remained she would never age, sicken or wither. She would remain as she was now and she would grow stronger with time, instead of weaker. Even as a Human she'd done a damn respectable job of defeating those who'd tried to hurt her, many of whom already had preternatural strength and lifetimes of experience on their side. So if she could hold her own as a Human she felt fairly confident she'd be a tough nut to crack as a Vampire.

In the end she awarded that particular point to "becoming a Vampire". But there was another point that went squarely to "staying Human" and it was one close to her heart. She wouldn't just be giving up sunbathing and peach cobbler if she became a Vampire, she'd be giving up people. Their names ran through her head as she ticked off the ones she loved, the ones she was fairly certain wouldn't want anything to do with her again if she became a Vampire. Sam, who hated them with a blind passion, Tara who had never gotten over her experiences with Franklin and Mickey, and bigotedly believed that the two Vampires she'd had anything do with were somehow indicative of an entire species. Claude, who she would never be able to see again since he couldn't mask his scent, and who was depending on her right now to help him as he grieved for the loss of yet another sister.

She hoped Jason wouldn't hold it against her since he'd made his own transition to a supernatural creature in the recent past. She felt, even though Alcide would probably not be happy about it, if she chose to become a Vampire, he would live with it and not shun her. He didn't like Vampires per se, but he and Eric managed to get along fairly well, so she felt some optimism that their friendship would survive her transformation. Of all of her friends, she was most confident about Amelia, who she felt fairly certain had no prejudices against anyone for what they were. She certainly held Pam in high esteem and that gave Sookie hope that, if Amelia could ever forgive her for Trey's death, she wouldn't turn away from her for being turned.

Still, the thought of losing half of the people who meant something to her was heartbreaking. And it was followed quickly by the realization that even if she managed to hang on to a few of her friends, she'd be watching them die in what would become the blink of an eye to her, while she remained the same, while she continued on.

It felt unnatural to her, the thought of laying her friends and her brother in the ground while she remained twenty-eight forever. Before she could put that in the "stay Human" category though something occurred to her that hadn't before; there were no guarantees that anyone would live a long life and die peacefully of old age in their beds. She'd outlived her grandparents, her parents, her aunt and her cousin already all of whom had died either violently or before their time.

Of course it would hurt deeply to watch Jason or any of her friends pass, but it could happen next week or next year, just as easily as it could decades from now and she wouldn't have any control over it one way or the other. Everyone died, even Vampires, it wasn't something you could stop your life for or plan your future around.

Sookie looked down and realized her coffee had gone cold and the day had grown warm, while she was trying to make a rational decision. Given that she still didn't feel like a clear answer had presented itself, she figured she could probably sit here all day weighing the pros and cons and never come to one. She supposed she could have told herself much earlier, before making her brain hurt with all the back and forth, that rational thinking wasn't her strong suit. She was smart even if she wasn't educated, she knew that, but she also knew that she did her best when she let her heart do the leading.

She'd gone after Bill in Jackson because her heart told her it was the right thing to do. She'd thrown a piece of furniture through Eric's hotel room window, and tobogganed down the side of a building with him on Pam's coffin, not because it was safe or rational, but because her heart told her it was the right thing to do. She'd run her car over Sigebert, held a soda can bomb, sheltered an amnesiac Vampire, and done a bunch of other things rationality told her were just plain stupid, but for the most part she didn't regret her choices. Even saving Bill in Jackson which, upon initial hindsight, had seemed as though it brought her more bad than good, had turned out in the end. If Bill hadn't lived she would never have survived the attack by the water Fairies.

She'd been wrong before, she couldn't deny that, but as she looked back on the things that happened to her in the last few years; she realized that she most often got herself into trouble when she let her head get in the way. She'd known for some time before his kidnapping that Bill had been taking her for granted and losing interest in her, but she'd chosen to stay with him because her head told her it would be disloyal to leave him.

Likewise she'd known she was in love with Eric since the night of the Witch War, but she'd stubbornly refused to tell him what happened between them when he lost his memories of their time together. Instead she'd denied him the answers he'd come looking for because her head told her "real Eric" could never feel for her as "Amnesia Eric" had. And in turning him away and denying him, she'd started a vicious game of 'one up' between them, with each of them attempting to hurt the other in ever increasing degrees.

She'd denied him his answers so he'd coldly blackmailed her to get them. She gave him the words but not the feelings, so he ignored her and pretended she was nothing to him. She was hurt by his seeming indifference so she took up with Quinn, who she'd known from the beginning she could never really love, just to show Eric she wasn't sitting around crying over him or his assholish behavior. All of it culminated in the night she'd laughed right in his face and walked off with Quinn, only to be left sitting across a table from the wrong man trying to swallow the soul deep ache her own actions had caused. If Eric had never gotten his memories back it might have gone on like that until they'd wounded each other past the point of forgiving.

No her head definitely hadn't been doing her many favors, and she suspected it wouldn't do her any good now either. So then, the only question to contemplate was _what did her heart tell her to do_?

The answer to that was simple, frighteningly simple. Her heart wanted Eric and her heart was loyal to a fault. She could never see herself growing tired of him or wanting to be with others, as he told her could possibly happen. She knew Eric was loyal to a fault too. His heart, once given, would never be rescinded. She suspected it was the reason he rarely ever gave it. He wouldn't make that kind of commitment unless he was sure he meant it. It made her believe with an unshakable certainty, even here, alone in the bright sunlit world, that they could be one of those few bonded pairs who found forever.

And with the belief, that they _could _have forever, her other objections seemed to recede into the background. They weren't meaningless, they never would be, they simply didn't compare to the future she suddenly, truly saw for them. Her reasons for staying Human had been sound, but none of them had been about being happy. They were pessimistic reasons, losing friends, losing family, losing _dessert_. Her reason for choosing to become like Eric was all about her happiness, living with and loving with the man she'd wanted longer than she was comfortable admitting, for as long as God and their own wits would grant them.

Picking up her cold, half-empty coffee cup and her afghan, Sookie walked inside hurriedly and picked up her phone. She kept her text to Eric short and vague, only asking him to come to her tonight. She knew she needed to make other calls as well, to Sam, to Jason and maybe to Tara and Amelia too, but she knew that those conversations would be hard at best and hurtful at worst, and she didn't want to deal with that right now.

She wanted to be happy. She wanted to hold on to the joy she felt in her choice, and she wanted to greet Eric with the excitement and hope she felt right now still on her face. All things she knew wouldn't happen if she made those other calls, and had to listen as her friends told her she was stupid, questioned her sanity, or threatened never to see her again if she went through with it.

Determined not to watch the clock endlessly Sookie did something she knew she would never get to do again. Something that wasn't exactly for her, but made her feel happy and contented, as though she were ending this part of her life on the right foot: she tended her Gran's garden one last time. Weeding, pruning and readying it for the glory she wouldn't get to see when May came and it bloomed like an enchanted forest, but that she somehow felt her Gran would see, even from heaven.

When it was done, after hours of painstaking work on Sookie's part, she showered and put on one of her favorite sundresses. Using her pruning shears for the last time, she clipped a few of the loveliest early spring blooms, and carried them through the cemetery to her Gran's grave.

Sookie knelt on the ground and laid them down silently. Taking the time to tend this spot too, making sure her beloved grandmother's resting place would meet its occupant's high standards. She felt as though she wanted to say something, but she suspected her Gran already knew what she'd decided, and that she wouldn't disapprove. She'd loved Bill almost as much as Sookie had, in the beginning, and she had no doubt her Gran would love her just the same. Since there was no need to convince herself and no need to justify things to her grandmother, she simply placed a small kiss on the smooth marble of the headstone: where Adele's name was inscribed.

"I know it will probably take a little longer now, but I _will_ see you again, Gran. And I'll be missing you every night until then." With that Sookie picked herself up and walked back through the cemetery, noticing as she did that the sun was just touching the western horizon. Taking her seat on the porch swing again she decided to watch her last sunset while she waited.

As the sun dipped lower and lower on the horizon, the colors of the sky faded from bright beautiful blue to deep opaque navy. The transition interrupted only by that magical moment when half the sun was gone but the other half remained, and it set the sky around it on fire with colors of gold and crimson and purple. Sookie felt a sense of peace she'd never experienced before. She watched as each of the stars made themselves known in the dark canopy of the sky, twinkling as though they were welcoming her to her new life. She was so caught up in watching the sky she barely registered the feeling of happiness that came over her from outside of herself.

She knew she didn't have long to wait and, sure enough, just as the floodlights flickered on, telling her someone was approaching, she heard the telltale crunch of tires low on gravel, that signaled Eric's Corvette was coming up the drive. She laughed just a bit when she saw the cloud of gravel dust kicked up behind his speeding tires, before her eyes could actually discern the deep, dark cherry of his car's finish.

The Corvette ground to a halt, not ten feet from her, and when Eric climbed out and their eyes locked she knew that she didn't need to give him any long explanations or pretty speeches. Instead she gave him a single word, the only one she knew he wanted to hear:

"Yes."


	5. Chapter 5

_**A/N:**__ So who's up for a little Vampire Sookie? Yeah, we finally made it to the beginning of the actual plot! (my husband is always complaining that it takes me forever to get to the point- Dang, now I'm gonna have to admit he's right!)_

_Thanks so much to everyone who's been reviewing, alerting and favoriting this story, it means the world to me and thank you a thousand times over to my fabu beta, __**Northman Maille**__! I don't know what I would do without you!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…I'm just smart enough to know you can't spell "Erotic" without Eric! (Coincidence? I think not!)_

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In the centuries that followed, Eric would remember this moment, standing on the uneven gravel in front of her farmhouse, looking with shocked disbelief at his beautiful woman, as the single most perfect moment of his existence.

In a life which had seen so much death, so much violence and cruelty, both his own and that of others, it was a single instant of true and honest joy. A moment filled with hope and eager anticipation for the future. In that one endless, and at the same time fleeting, space of time everything was possibility, and what was possible suddenly felt attainable. He could have shouted to the four corners of the earth, he could have slayed the dragons of his peoples' legends, or fought all the great wars of antiquity on his own, fueled by nothing more than his ecstatic elation.

Though he would never admit it to anyone, he'd been walking around in a near haze for months, since the moment he regained his memories of his week in this very house with the woman who looked on him so expectantly now. He'd known he felt something strong, and deep, and un-ignorable for her for a long time. He'd tried to master it, push it down, banish it for ages, but to no avail.

When he'd finally accepted what she'd brought to the surface would never be locked away again: he'd done everything in his power to make her his, even against her own considerable will. He'd bonded to her, he'd married her, he'd maneuvered himself back into her bed, all with the single-minded determination of a man clinging to a life raft in a storm tossed ocean. He'd suspected what he felt for her was love as far back as Jackson, perhaps even Dallas, but what shocked him to his core, when his memories had suddenly and inexplicably returned, was what little difference they made.

For months, he assumed they were the key to the great mystery that was his irrational attachment to Sookie Stackhouse. In reality though, it was almost… relieving to finally know that what had taken place between them, wonderful as it had been, didn't actually change anything. His head might have forgotten what they'd shared but his body and his heart hadn't. Instead of bringing with them some soul deep catharsis, his missing memories had merely joined the feelings he'd felt for her before his curse, and together they'd cemented the truth he'd already begun to accept.

That his life, his un-death, his existence however it was best defined, was no longer whole without the stubborn, beautiful and exciting spitfire that was his telepathic fairy. And from that moment a new feeling had blossomed inside of him: fear.

He could see it clearly even if she refused to. Everything about their relationship now, from their unwilling bonding and ambush marriage, to her inexplicably passive acceptance of him as her lover once more, wasn't bringing them closer together, it was tearing them apart. He could see the end for them so clearly in every non conversation they had, in every begrudging admittance of affection between them and it terrified him beyond his ability to express.

His memories of their time together when he was cursed were so filled with simple happiness and quiet affection. He wanted desperately to bring them back to that place, but didn't know how. And, unlike her, he couldn't fool himself that their relationship was anything but tainted by heartache and pain. It was contaminated by so much anger and mistrust, it was choking them, squeezing the life out of their love for each other.

And yet, something had happened. He couldn't imagine what finally jolted her out of her apathy, but he would not question it. She had chosen him! Not just for a few paltry years or decades, but for always. His long battle to have her truly was at an end.

"Eric, say something."

He heard her call to him, anxiety lacing her sweet voice. He realized then, that he'd been doing nothing but standing in front of his open car door staring at her for long moments.

He didn't even know he'd moved until he found himself in front of her, his body less than an inch from all of her soft, fragrant warmth. Suddenly he ached to take her into his arms, where he was determined she would remain until everything else on the planet ceased to be.

"Lover, I…" He'd never been a man of many words but neither had he ever found himself at a loss for the correct ones before. Everything in him was vibrating at a fever pitch, desperate to believe he wasn't dreaming, but scared to touch her and watch her evaporate like an apparition.

It was Sookie who closed the distance between them, wrapping her tiny arms around his waist and burying her lovely face in his chest. For a single second longer he marveled that she didn't disappear, the world didn't end, or he didn't wake up. Then, compelled by every instinct he possessed, both Human and Vampire, he swallowed her in his embrace, lifting her off the porch floor so her head was higher than his, and his face could burrow into the soft column of her throat.

The only thing he heard was her gentle laughter as she rearranged herself, closing her arms around his neck now and locking her legs around his waist, clinging to him as though he were her safety and her joy. They stayed like that for a long time until he felt her begin to shiver. He looked up at her then and heard her gasp, shock momentarily crossing her features before they settled into an expression of immense love.

Lifting a hand to his face, she wiped away a bloody tear he hadn't even realized had escaped. Then, as if reassuring him, in a way words never could, that she was ready for the life she'd chosen with him, she slowly lowered her face and began to lick away the track it had taken, leaving butterfly kisses behind in its place.

"Now, Eric. I don't want to wait, now, please." She begged, just before her lips closed over his.

As they clung together he moved them sightlessly into the house. They stopped only for a moment, after he'd laid her down in front of the fireplace, so he could light it. She'd put fresh logs into the grate earlier in the day knowing, with absolute certainty, that this is where it would happen. She'd never expected Eric to simply bite and her drain her, but nothing in her still limited imagination could have prepared her for the way he took her.

Eric had never been so gentle with her or so passionate. It was as though he was laying his soul bare before her, giving her everything within him with each kiss, each caress. Every soft lick of his tongue on her heated skin, every hard, deep thrust of his manhood within her was like a benediction, a prayer.

For hours he loved her, turning her body this way and that, wringing the pleasure from her, demanding her release again and again until she trembled beneath him. Her limbs were exhausted, her body coated with sweat and desire that he licked from her skin, as she sobbed her love for him into the non-existent space between them.

She felt sure it must have been very close to dawn, when he brought her over the edge, gently one last time with his hands as he kissed her mouth reverently. When she broke their kiss to sigh her pleasure his eyes locked with hers and she knew the moment had come.

"Will it hurt?" She asked him softly, almost breathless. Eric only smiled down on her, his lips brushing hers again even as he shook his head.

"No, love, I won't let it." With that he lowered his mouth to her neck and with less pain than a pin prick, she felt his fangs sink into her skin. As he began to pull gently from the wound he brought them to lay side by side, his arms around her, cradling her, his hands stroking, one in her hair and the other up and down her back. She felt the moment when he would normally withdraw come and go, but she was too exhausted from their endless lovemaking to summon the energy to be afraid. Instead, as her arms went limp around him and her head lolled in his hands, she felt a sense of drowsy peace come over her. The last thing she was aware of before she drifted off to sleep was the heavenly scent of Eric surrounding her.

Opening his wrist, tearing the skin away to form a deep gash that would not heal quickly, Eric put his arm to Sookie's sleeping mouth. He massaged her throat, helping her already unconscious body take his blood. When he'd given it to her three times he left her momentarily on the carpet before the fire. Reaching into his discarded pants he pressed the first number on his speed dail: Pam's personal cell.

"Eric, how's our favorite breather tonight?" Pam asked, her voice, as ever, filled with the mischief she reserved especially for teasing him about Sookie.

"She breathes no more." He answered simply. He could feel Pam's sudden and complete panic even over the distance between them and before she could sputter a reply he continued. "She will be one of us in three nights." This time Pam answered with shocked awe in her voice.

"She let you turn her?" Eric looked at the lifeless body of his love, still naked on the floor.

"Yes. Contact Herveaux. Have him put security on her house for the next three days, but don't tell him why. Simply instruct him that no one enters the house. Tell him he can name his price when the job is done."

"Of course."

"At night, I wish both you and Thalia to stand watch. " He could hear the sound of Pam nodding against the phone's earpiece and smiled to himself, she really was a wonderful child.

"I'll make sure to be at the house at sunset on the third night with a good meal for my new sister." Pam said, her shock now over and excitement replacing it. He was beyond delighted at her response to this news. He knew all three of them would be happy together and he felt Pam's enthusiasm drawing out his own.

"I will see you soon." He said simply, knowing there was no need to say more. Pam felt all he felt and their happiness at this moment was in perfect harmony.

"Sweet dreams, Eric." She said, no hint of teasing or snark in her voice. The small laugh she gave was one of merry anticipation

Turning to the source of both of their joys, Eric picked up Sookie's body. He brought her first to her room, dressing her in in the peach silk robe he'd bought for her, and then to the cubby under her guest closet, where he laid her down carefully, curling himself around her in the small space.

Just as dawn took him, he felt it: the tiny spark lighting within him that meant it had worked. Slipping into his daytime rest with a smile on his lips, Eric felt almost giddy. Three nights could not pass fast enough. He literally could not wait to watch the moment Sookie rose, his forever.

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The first stir of the new life came for her as it had for him a millennium ago, with a sudden instinctive gasp for unneeded air. He watched it from his place beside her on her bed, where he'd brought her as soon as he'd risen.

Just as he refused to let Pam wake trapped under the ground centuries ago, so he refused to let Sookie wake under the floorboards in her closet. She'd never admitted it to him, but he knew she'd become frightened of small, enclosed places, since the night she'd been trapped and nearly drained by Bill, in the trunk of a car.

He remembered with the perfect clarity only a Vampire possessed, how disorienting the first rising was and he wouldn't make this any harder for her than it needed to be. She had chosen to be with him for eternity and he would make sure that she never regretted that choice.

"Sookie." She heard the rich, dark baritone of his voice and felt herself powerless to disobey his call. He wished her to wake, he wished her to come to his side.

Opening her eyes she looked on him with awe as she saw him with her new sight; beautiful, strong, utterly masculine, golden when all else was painted in tones of silver, perfection. She could have stared into his depthless, jewel-like blue eyes all night… if it had not been for the twinge that began to take root. It started as nothing more than an annoyance in her belly, but soon spread, with insidious stealth, until it lodged in her throat, making it burn in a way water would never be able to quench.

Through their now double bond, Eric could feel the moment Sookie's still foggy, disoriented thoughts receded into the background and the hunger took her over. He knew she would need to feed first before they would be able to talk, and he was again proud of his elder child.

Pam had brought Sookie the best of the best for her first meal; three girls, all young, healthy and untainted by controlled substances. He knew without having to ask that they were not fangbangers, and he only hoped Sookie wouldn't be upset later because they were most likely glamoured into service this night. But it was especially important, tonight of all nights, that Sookie learn to feed from living Humans (lest she attack the denizens of his bar anytime she became peckish) and that her meal be pure. A newborn was volatile enough without the added worry of drugs or alcohol tainting their already nonexistent impulse control.

"What you feel is hunger, love. Pam has already arranged for you to have your first meal. Come, I'll help you." He said, smiling down on her as he offered his hand to help her up.

He watched as Sookie's brain, a scrambled mess of instinctive need, attempted to process his words. It took a moment for her to understand but then he felt her hand tighten around his. He knew she would feel clearer and more able to reason after she'd eaten.

Leading her out of the bedroom and down the hall to the living room, where Pam waited with the girls, Eric felt the exact instant Sookie's newly heightened senses detected the scent of her waiting meals. Quickly his hand left hers and he pulled her into his side, gripping her shoulders, gently for now, but prepared to exert more pressure as it was needed.

As they entered the dimly lit living room he heard Sookie give a hungry growl and detected the telltale snicking of her new fangs dropping into place. He felt his pants tighten at the sight of the erotic little points now peeking out of her mouth, and couldn't wait to see her use them. Lowering his lips to her ear he spoke softly, careful not to overwhelm her sensitive hearing.

"Don't be worried, I will be right here. Chose whichever one you like best, lick her neck to help the vein under her ear rise and bite down. When you feel the flow of blood start to slow it's time to stop. I will help you if you cannot. Do you understand?" Again it took another moment for his words to make their way past the haze of Sookie's intense hunger, but at length she nodded her head and he released her.

Sookie's movements were swift and deadly. Eric had barely released her arms before she was a blur, stopping in front of the armchair nearest the fireplace and grabbing the redheaded girl that sat there, her eyes glassy from glamour. Stepping behind her, Sookie swept back her hair and tilted her head forcefully, giving a single lick of the pulse under her ear before pulling back her lips, baring those alluring new fangs and slamming them into the girls throat.

Even with her head muddled by Pam's glamour the girl gave a groan of pain, but Sookie ignored it and greedily began to feed. Eric spared only a moment to look at Pam, as they stood watch over Sookie's first meal. Her raised eyebrow was all the indication he needed that she was as shocked as Eric by Sookie's behavior. They had both expected her to be reticent to feed from a living Human, and nervous before her first bite, but it seemed they had worried for nothing. Sookie was a born Vampire.

With a shrug of his shoulders Eric went back to watching his lover feed. He was entranced by the sight of her, her lush figure barely concealed by the silk that surrounded it, her hair floating in the slight breeze from the open window and her beautiful lips enclosed over the throat of the pretty girl. The sight of it made Eric's lust spike high and hard, surprising him with its urgency. It took everything within him not to throw the girl off of his Sookie, push her down onto the coffee table and fuck her violently in front of them all. So lost was he in his vision of their sex in front of an audience that it was only the clearing of Pam's throat that alerted him to the need to stop Sookie from taking any more from the girl.

"Sookie, you must stop now." He said. His voice gently firm, but as yet uncommanding. He would give her the opportunity to try and stop for herself before exerting his will. As he'd expected she ignored him completely continuing to pull on the slowing flow of the girl's blood.

"Sookie, I command you to stop." This time he felt as much as saw the bands of his command wrapping around her, forcing her. When she pulled her bloody mouth from the girls throat, hissing at him all the while, he didn't know if he wanted to laugh at her clear displeasure (whether for stopping her from feeding or simply from being commanded so soon upon rising) or lick the blood from her lips as he parted the folds of her robe with his achingly hard cock. "Lick the puncture marks on her neck to seal the wound and then you may have another." He said no command in his voice this time, only gentle instruction. His love looked at him with narrowed eyes for one second longer and then did as she was bid.

Sookie fed quickly on both of the other girls, needing each time to be commanded to stop, but taking it slightly better by the third time. When Eric could feel through their connection that she was finally sated he instructed Pam to heal each of the girls and take them to wherever she'd found them. With a final look between her Maker and her new sibling, Pam nodded her head, smiling slightly as she closed the door behind her wondering, what, if any, of the house would still be standing by dawn.

"Do you feel better?" Eric asked, once they were alone. Sookie's response came much more quickly this time and he knew the haze of the first rising and the first hunger was finally receding.

"I do. Thank you." She answered, her voice soft and lilting, the perfect Southern Belle once more, now that she'd eaten.

"You did very well for your first feeding. I'm proud of you." He said, coming closer to her, taking her in his arms. Her arms wound their way around his neck without any hesitation. "And you did not try to molest any of the girls. That was especially impressive." He teased, squeezing her around the waist. He could feel both of their lusts beginning to get out of hand, and knew if he had anything that was vital to impart to her for the next few hours he'd better do it now. Sookie shook her head, her eyes beginning to sparkle with a new hunger.

"They tasted wonderful, but I didn't want them like that. I couldn't, all I could see was you." With that she attacked him, in the very best way, and any thought of further lessons were forgotten.

He didn't know what he expected of Sookie her first night as a Vampire, but he'd thought there was a good chance she would be shy, uncertain and perhaps scared of her new body and it's unfamiliar and demanding needs. The reality was anything but. She'd fed with enthusiasm, not sparing a single moment to feel shy about the prospect of drinking from what she so recently was, and not feeling shamed when she had trouble stopping on her own. Now that her first hunger was met, she was blithely throwing herself into sating the next one, her desire for him. He'd never been so happy in his existence as he was in the last week, and he knew he would never forget his first time with 'Vampire Sookie'. She'd been unforgettable before, but nothing could compare to this.

There were no inhibitions and no holding back as Sookie ripped the jeans from his body, using her new strength to rent them into two huge pieces that came away, one in each of her hands. She'd barely dropped them when she tackled him to the floor, their bodies landing on the carpet before the fire yet again. She devoured him with biting, sucking kisses all over his chest, drawing blood with her fangs as she moved over his body, moaning in ecstasy at the taste of his skin and his blood on her tongue. As she sucked at his chest and his stomach her hand found the steel of his hard cock and began to pump him roughly.

Eric could do nothing more for a single, giddily shocked moment than watch her, his hips bucking high, pushing his erection farther into her hand, as he cried out from the pleasure of her merciless assault. Then for the first time with her, he let any guise humanity fall away, responding instinctively to her wildness. Sparing no thought to being careful, since he no longer needed to fear for her fragile Human body, and worrying not a moment for her still tender Human sensibilities, since she clearly was not, he met her desire head on with his own.

Using his superior strength he flipped them, slamming her into the carpeted floor. He then took the flaps of her robe in his hands and tore them open just as she'd done to his pants, baring her body, the body he'd watched and lusted after all night. Seeing Sookie look up at him, smiling wantonly, her fangs fully on display just like the rest of her, Eric let rational thought drift off into ether.

Lowering his body swiftly onto hers, just barely registering the feeling of her legs locking around his hips, he brought his mouth down on hers hard, his tongue invading her mouth and his lips wrapping around one of her dainty fangs. Sookie's head fell back as a stab of pleasure lanced from the tip of her fang straight to her throbbing bundle of nerves, causing her pussy to contract in need as she cried out at the new and exquisite feeling.

Not letting her escape him, Eric's head followed hers. Letting her body support the full measure of his weight, he brought one of his hands to her hair and gripped the golden strands fiercely. Holding her head in place so that she couldn't elude his questing mouth, he slid the other hand down between them, thrumming her clit in time to the sweet torture of his lips and tongue around her sensitive new teeth.

It was Sookie's turn to rear up hard against the onslaught of pleasure and for a moment, with her now heightened strength, she raised both of their lower bodies up off the floor, before finding a rhythm that allowed her to fuck his hand perfectly. It took only a few short minutes for her to see stars in front of her eyes as she came, loud and fierce beneath him. Then, without words, he found himself in a new position, underneath her once again, with his back against the side of the couch as she tussled them in to the perfect pose to sink down on his painfully swollen erection.

Sookie cried out again, already recovered from her first release, but not nearly close to satisfied, as she felt the perfection of his huge, thick girth splitting her entrance in half. Raking her nails down his chest in bliss she began to ride him eagerly, lifting up easily until just the tip of his head was still hidden in her folds and slamming herself down hard until there was nothing of him left outside her.

As she rode him her beautiful breasts danced in his face and he was powerless against their silent hypnotism. Gripping her sides, heedless of his strength as he now knew he could be, Eric hauled Sookie closer to his mouth, pulling one of her beautiful rose pink nipples between his lips and sucking it almost manically, letting his fangs rake across the delicate skin and lapping up the bubbles of her blood that rose to the surface.

As the night wore on they moved throughout the house, more by chance then design. They were insatiable in their desire for one another, falling apart in each other's arms over and over again but never once stopping, instead thrusting and writing through one release eager to begin the climb to another.

He took her hard from behind bent over the arm of the couch only to find himself tossed onto its soft cushions so she could ride him hard. They'd eventually fallen off the couch, in a tangle of still joined limbs, only to end up under the coffee table which he'd thrown across the room, without thinking, when it had prevented him from hauling her onto his lap. They'd fed from each other's necks as he pushed her again and again into the yellow painted molding by the entrance to the hallway, only stopping when pieces of drywall came off onto her back.

As the dawn approached they licked each other clean of the night's pleasures, and he'd finally been able to stop them long enough to ask her if she was still hungry. When she'd said she wasn't, that his blood had fulfilled her hunger even better than all three of the girls she'd fed from earlier, he'd taken a suddenly drowsy Sookie into his arms and tucked them both inside the cubby. Closing the trap door on top of them he wrapped himself around her.

"I was right." He said, nuzzling his nose into her hair, which like every part of her smelled thoroughly of him after their hours of ecstatic fucking.

"Mmm?" she said, the sun's impending rise beginning to lull her senses.

"You're a magnificent Vampire, Sookie." She turned in his arms, sluggishly then, kissing his chest before smiling up at him, pride dancing in her eyes at his compliment.

"Thank you…." She started, but then trailed off at the end as though something had just occurred to her. "What's your name?" She suddenly asked, looking up at him with wide, blank eyes, just before the dawn took her completely under for the day.


	6. Chapter 6

_**A/N:**__ Not much to say except: Thank You guys so much for the awesome response to the last chapter. It really blew my mind! _

_And of course, thank you to my awesome, wonderful and amazing beta, __**Northman Maille**__. The editing she does on these chapters goes well beyond grammar! She deserves more praise and gratitude than I could ever express!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I don't own them…._

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

When she opened her eyes the next night she found them both in the same position as before: her lying on the large, soft bed and he sitting at her side. Only this time there was no expectant smile on his face. Instead he wore an expression of…trepidation. She found that his possible unhappiness displeased her greatly and she smiled up at him softly, hoping to dispel his worries. His response was merely to pour her a glass of blood from a decanter on the night table.

"Are they're no Humans tonight?" Her worries for his mood began to recede as she smelled the blood sluggishly filling the glass, and her hunger became nearly blinding. By the time he handed it to her she couldn't really say that she cared much about his answer one way or the other. Nothing mattered to her now except getting the sweet smelling substance out of the glass and down her burning throat as quickly as possible.

When she'd drained the entire decanter she handed him back the glass for a final time and looked up expectantly. His face seemed more composed this time, but she could sense inside of herself he was still worried.

"Better?" He asked, his voice soft with affection despite his mysterious inner turmoil. She only nodded her head, waiting. "We need to talk, dear one. I brought you bagged blood so we could move the feeding portion of the night along more quickly, and so we would not be… distracted afterwards, as we were last night."

She laughed mischievously at that. She'd thoroughly enjoyed the way they'd passed the night and she knew, by more ways than one, he had too.

Eric watched Sookie for any sign of her usual reactions. He knew she could no longer blush at the mention of the wild sex they'd had the night before, but he saw none of her other tells either. She didn't try to hide her face in embarrassment or give him her adorable version of 'stink eyes', something he enjoyed almost as much as her rising color. She simply laughed kittenishly, completely unflustered by his mention of their uninhibited escapades. In any other circumstances he would have been proud of her for leaving some of her more ridiculous modesty behind, but tonight it only served to twist the knot of fear in his stomach a little bit tighter.

"Do you know who I am?" He asked, after some moments of just staring at her, finally forcing the words he'd been dreading to ask out of his mouth.

She made no immediate answer to his question but, after another long silence in which she looked at him, at her lap and then at her hands, he felt the sensation of her own uneasiness merging with his. Her emotions didn't stop at unease though, they quickly escalated into all out panic as she continued to stare at her hands, which had begun to tremble slightly.

She'd been so preoccupied with her hunger again she hadn't bothered to think about much else. She was thinking now though, and he sent her wave after wave of calm and love to keep her emotions from spiraling out of control. Finally she looked up at him and her eyes were brimming with anxiety.

"I know I'm connected to you. I know I feel safe and comforted by your presence and I think you're beautiful. But…no, I don't know who you are and I don't know you're name. Should I?"

Eric had been steeling himself for those words since he'd risen an hour before. He'd tried to prepare for the reaction they would cause, even as he attempted to delude himself all was well. He'd told himself, over and over again, it was nothing more than the disorientation of her first rising which led to her confusion last night, even if he didn't really believe it. Yet nothing could have readied him for the feelings that struck him as they came out of her mouth.

Pain, white and hot, lanced through his chest, reminding him of the night so many centuries ago when he'd been partially staked by an enemy. Only this was worse…far, far worse. There was no cure for it, no object to remove to lessen the searing burn. Something had gone wrong, terribly wrong, and his Sookie: the woman he'd fought so hard to win, the woman he loved to near crazed obsession, no longer remembered him, nor did she seem to remember herself… if her reactions were any indication.

With each passing second he sat there, no doubt staring at her with his breaking heart bleeding upon his sleeve, he felt her fright and alarm rising higher and higher. He knew that her barely controlled emotions were quickly approaching a breaking point and it was for her sake he pulled himself back from the brink of his own desolation.

"I'm sorry!" She whispered, her voice filled with misery, not just for herself but for being the cause of his own as well.

Reaching out he pulled her into his lap and flush against his chest. The physical contact seemed to relax her and she let her head fall into the crook of his neck, the place he'd begun to think of as hers since long before they'd become lovers again, since he'd recovered his own memories from his time cursed under this roof.

"You have nothing to be sorry for. You've done nothing wrong." Putting his hand under her chin he raised her head until their eyes met. With a great effort Eric pushed down his own churning emotions, and the deep anguish he felt trying to take him over, and infused the bond with every fiber of his love, as he smiled at her gently.

"I am Eric. I am your Maker and I will take care of you. You have nothing to fear."

She nodded her head slowly, one of her hands coming up to rest over his own where it still held her chin, and squeezing softly with relief. He could feel her taking comfort in the strength he shared with her.

"Thank you!" She said earnestly. He broke their eye contact only momentarily so he could kiss the top of her head and then looked at her once more. It was better to get it all out of the way quickly he thought, like ripping off a bandage.

"Do you remember who _you_ are?" Again she looked down at her lap and he could feel her searching her mind for the answer to his question. It took less time than before, for her to look back up at him, crestfallen, and shake her head.

"I remember you called me Sookie last night, but if you'd asked me I couldn't have told you if that was truly my name or not." A single blood tear slipped down her cheek and he caught it on the tip of his finger, bringing it to her mouth, not wanting her to lose even a precious drop.

As she licked the tear away and then settled into his lap he tried to tell her everything, from the beginning. It pained him to realize that, despite the things she'd shared with him while he was cursed and the times they'd spent together, there were still parts of her he knew very little about.

He found himself glossing over those things and instead concentrating on their life together. He told her about Bill, in as much neutral detail as he could. He told her about the adventures they'd had together. He watched her laugh as he recounted their 'date' to an orgy where he'd dressed in ridiculous pink spandex just to get a rise out of her, and had done nothing more lewd than steal a few kisses from her on the hood of his car. He even admitted that although he'd hoped to seduce her that night, he found himself more fulfilled by those few stolen caresses than he had been by much more in centuries.

He'd just come to her decision to be turned and the night he made her when they both heard the car pull up in front of the house. Eric had been expecting Pam but he could tell immediately, by the sound of the engine and the way the gravel crunched under the car's tires, that it wasn't her. No sooner had the engine cut off and the door slammed shut than the smell of wet dog began to waft to them both.

Eric groaned in irritation, but couldn't help a small smile as he saw Sookie wrinkle her nose at the Shifter's offensive scent. He wished he could ask her why the man was here, or when the last time they'd spoken was and what she'd told him, but he knew that it would be pointless. Knowing better than to waste energy being frustrated at a circumstance he could not change, he instead chose to channel that frustration towards the Shifter himself. He tried not to feel too excited that, at the very least, Sookie would no longer care one way or the other if he decided to neuter Merlotte right on her front porch.

The Shifter was climbing the front steps as Eric tried to come to some sort of decision about what to do. If he told Sookie to remain in the bedroom and not come to the door it would keep her friend from realizing that something was wrong with her, but it would probably also raise his suspicions that something far worse had happened. Not knowing if Sookie had told Sam she'd chosen to be turned, it might be more trouble than it was worth, given everything else they were facing at the moment. Especially if the flea bitten prick decided to involve the Human authorities. No, it was better for him to see her for himself.

"Come." He helped her up off of his lap and began to lead her to the front door. "Follow my lead when we talk to him and do not tell him you are having trouble remembering." Sookie nodded her head and he felt her small hand tighten its grip on his.

They'd just approached the door when Sam decided to bypass more polite modes of alerting the house's occupants to his arrival, and instead went straight for yanking the screen aside, and banging heavily on the front door.

Pissed at the intrusion on an already emotionally charged night, Eric let Sam pound for a few moments longer than necessary before swinging the door open just as he was bringing his fist down on the wood, causing the shifter to pitch forward slightly, before regaining his balance.

"Shifter." Eric said, letting his disdain for the smaller man drip from the single word.

"Vampire." Their caller replied, attempting to match Eric's tone but failing since he lacked the many centuries of experience necessary to hone his contempt. "I'm looking for Sookie. Where is she?"

"I'm right here." Sookie said, coming out from behind Eric.

Wrapping her arms around Eric's middle as much for comfort as for show, she tried to pretend the person in the doorway wasn't as much of a stranger to her as the person in the mirror. Sam started to speak again, beginning to tell her he'd come over as soon as he could get away from the bar, because he'd been trying to phone her all day and had gotten no answer, when the wind outside picked up. From the draft of the open door the scent of the two people in front of him invaded his nose and his eyes grew wide, first with astonishment and then with blind, raging anger.

"You son of a bitch!" He screamed, sounding almost deranged. "What the hell have you done to her?"

Eric had been expecting his anger, had even been surprised it had taken the Shifter so long to realize Sookie was no longer Human. What he hadn't been expecting was his child's response. The old Sookie, the one who was so plainly no longer here with him, would have reacted to her friend's words with indignation, perhaps a stomp of her foot and a sharp tongue lashing, maybe even a slammed door in the face if Merlotte had continued to be rude and unreasonable.

What she would not have done, was barreled past Eric at her newly heightened speed, taken the stunned Shifter by the throat, raising him several inches off the ground, and then thrown him clear of the porch directly into the side of his car. Nor would she have raced to his crumpled figure, pinning him to the jagged gravel with her bare foot on his windpipe and flashed her razor sharp fangs, hissing a warning as her eyes burned like two bright, hot coals.

"Don't speak to my Maker like that, you smelly piece of shit!"

Under different circumstances Eric would have been endlessly amused by her reaction, would have sent her his boundless pride and affection even as he half-heartedly scolded her, for forms sake alone… under different circumstances. Instead he rushed to the two figures under the floodlights and pulled Sookie from her former boss. The last thing he needed tonight was to have to bury a body and come up with an alibi. Even in their current situation he'd prefer to keep the homicides down to a weekly occurrence.

"Sookie, let him go!" Eric said, softly in her ear as she tried to struggle free of his hold so she could finish what she'd started. "Sookie, _you will_ be still."

The roar of frustration that left her mouth filled the empty darkness like the crashing of thunder, as Eric felt her succumb to his command. He sent her silent apology through the bond along with another heavy dose of calm as he placed her behind him, allowing Merlotte to get gingerly back to his feet.

"As you can see, Sookie has agreed to be turned and has risen as my child. Let that be an end to it Merlotte. She is mine willingly. She is no longer your employee and you will cease to have anything further to do with her unless she contacts you. Do you understand?" Eric's voice was menacing, only slightly more than Sookie's hisses and bared fangs from behind him, but still Sam persisted.

"You can't take her away from her life and her friends! I can't believe she'd ever let you willingly turn her. Not Sookie!" He turned his angry eyes from Eric back to his friend and they became pleading, pathetic. "Cher, you can't want this! Sookie, talk to me, please, I'll help you. I swear I'll find a way if that's what you want. Just say the word." It might have come to something far more bloody if the sound of another car coming up the drive hadn't startled them all into silence.

The three of them watched from their still tense positions as Pam's car pulled up next to Sam's truck. Gracefully lifting herself out of her Benze Kombi Pam surveyed the situation and sighed in a bored tone.

"Less than forty-eight hours and you're already making trouble, dog? Really, did Sookie not leave you enough kibble and water the last time she saw you?"

Realizing he was now severely outnumbered, Sam kicked some of the gravel from under his feet at no one in particular.

"Shut up, Pam." He snarled. Looking back at Sookie, his expression forlorn once more, he took a steadying breath. "I was just leaving, but don't think this is over." He said the last while puffing out his chest in defiance, it didn't last long though, it died with Sookie's next words.

"It _is_ over. I'm here by choice. I want to be with Eric. If you try to get in the way of that or make trouble for us, I'll find a way to end you and I'll make it painful!"

Even in the low light, the three Vampires could see the color drain from Sam's face, and it was all Pam could do to keep the astonishment from her own as she looked between Sam's hurt shock and Sookie's malevolent smile, both a promise and a threat all at once.

Sam wasted no more time getting into the cab of his truck and speeding away, leaving a cloud of gravel dust in his wake and three Vampires, all keyed up but for very different reasons.

Pam simply stared at her Maker and her sister in utter bewilderment. She could feel Eric's tidal wave of dark emotions as clearly as if they were her own. It seemed as though he was unable or unwilling to shut them away from her right now and she didn't have to be a genius to know something was very wrong.

Sookie felt nothing but her bloodlust as she pictured all the different ways she would mangle the Human who'd threatened to take her from her Maker. The smell of him was repugnant and she doubted she'd like the taste of his blood, but it wouldn't stop her from ripping out his throat with her fangs, and spitting his vile blood back in his face just before the light left his eyes.

Eric, trying to block himself off from Pam's bafflement and Sookie's nearly overwhelming desire for murder, was left with only his deep pain and gnawing worry. Sam's petty attempts to rile them with threats barely even registered over the knowledge that Sookie remembered nothing of her life and he was to blame for it somehow. Would it resolve itself? She wasn't cursed as he had been, something essential, it seemed, had gone wrong during her turning. He had no basis for determining what the chances were of the problem self-correcting, or what their options would be if it did not. He knew only that now was _not _the time for him to give into despair. Sookie needed him, his strength, his love and his guidance. Without it she would be lost in the sea of her own overwhelming emotions and overpowering instincts. He was determined, if nothing else, not to fail her as her Maker if he could help it.


	7. Chapter 7

_**A/N:**__ Not too much to say, but I wanted to apologize, I wasn't able to answer all the wonderful reviews you guys sent me for last chapter. Normally I try very hard to always at least say thank you (it's like the one good southern trait my mamma managed to instill in me) but I'm just starting to recover from my bout with the flu now and if I didn't have this chapter banked already I might not have been able to even post this week. So I apologize heartily and promise not to be ungrateful for all of your wonderful and uplifting comments again! They truly mean the world to me!_

_I have to thank my beta, __**Northman Maille**__, who is the sick one now, for all of her hard work! You are the best and I would be lost without you!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…. _

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Once they'd gone back into the house, Eric gestured for Pam and Sookie to be seated. He took the couch, motioning for Sookie to come sit beside him, and felt her body relax the moment she pressed her side against his. The tension from their confrontation with Merlotte melted away as her comfort merged with his own contentment at feeling her there. It left them both tranquil after the stressful encounter.

She did not remember him but her attachment to him and preference for him was clear: Eric was grateful for it. He tried hard to hang on to the feeling of rightness that infused him as they nestled close together, and not to dwell over the fact such behavior was surely caused by their bonds, both of them, and not by any deeper feelings for him.

After a cursory glance around the room and a studious ignoring of the fact the coffee table was lying in pieces by the entryway to the kitchen, instead of in its former home in front of the couch, Pam took the large armchair. She stared at Eric, one eyebrow raised in expectation.

"Sookie has no memory of her life before rising last night." His statement seemed to hang in the air.

Pam stared at him, dumbfounded, like he'd spoken to her in one of the few languages she didn't understand. After a few long moments in which it became clear Eric wasn't going to offer anything further, Pam made several attempts to speak but only ended up opening and closing her mouth repeatedly.

It was Sookie who finally broke the silence.

"It doesn't matter. I don't want anyone taking me away from you!" Her words were spoken with adamant devotion. Through the bond, Eric could sense her desire to murder Merlotte gaining momentum once more. Wrapping his arm around her and running his hand up and down her arm soothingly, Eric leaned down and kissed the top of Sookie's head, sending her reassurance and love across their blood connection.

"Be calm, dearest. I will not let anyone take you away from me, especially not the _dog_." He paused and looked at both of his women meaningfully before continuing. "I do think it best that we return to Shreveport right away though. If Merlotte intends to make trouble then we are not safe resting here, where he can find us. Sookie, go back into the big bedroom and pack a bag of clothes and toiletries as well as anything else you'd like to take with you. Pam and I will wait for you out here."

Sookie nodded her head, and rose to go down the hall.

Eric knew she would have preferred to sit by him a little longer, shaken as she was by her fear of being separated from him and still reeling from her desire for violence. But the threat of Merlotte returning with the police or coming during the day, stake in hand, was enough to motivate her to overcome her inclination. It was a small thing, but he sent her his pride all the same. Most newborns, only a scant two nights old, were ruled by their emotions and desires to the point they were unable to reason past their urges, much like small Human children. That Sookie understood the need for haste, and was able to pull back, deserved to be acknowledged and praised.

Once Sookie disappeared down the hall, Pam shifted into the space she'd vacated, lowering her voice enough so even with her sibling's new, heightened hearing, she would not be able to listen in on their conversation.

"What the hell happened?" She said, without preamble.

For a single moment she saw deep pain in Eric's eyes, but he swallowed it so fast that if she'd had the need to blink she would have missed it.

"I don't know, Pam." He answered her, his voice carefully neutral. "She was still alive when I gave her my blood. I don't understand it. Perhaps…perhaps it will right itself with time." Eric's hands clenched into fists tight enough to make the small amount of color in his skin disappear, before taking an unneeded breath and forcing himself to remain calm.

"And if it does not, what then?" Pam knew she was stating the obvious but she felt it needed to be said all the same.

She could feel Eric's anguish over the situation as well as the part of him that was clinging to hope. If he continued to expect Sookie to suddenly remember everything instead of accepting the circumstances as they were, he would only bring irreparable sorrow to both of them. For his part Eric wanted to retort acerbically, but he knew it was Pam's worry for him, for both him and Sookie, motivating her question.

"I don't know that either. We'll have to take things as they come for the time being." He answered her with as much equanimity as possible. "For now we will simply do what needs to be done. I will explain to Sookie how she is to behave in public, and then we'll join you at Fangtasia tomorrow night. I'll file the appropriate paperwork to register her as my progeny and contact the King to let him know that Sookie is now my bonded child. At the very least we will not have to worry about attempts to take her from my protection any longer.

Once she has a little more control over her emotions we will teach her to hunt and train her to defend herself. Victor is still very much an issue. I will not leave her defenseless or ignorant."

Pam was relieved to at least hear that Eric was thinking pragmatically even though the undercurrent of anxiety he was feeling was still detectable.

"What about Sookie's telepathy?" Pam ventured.

She knew she would need to stop needling him about all of this soon. As much as he'd kept his temper in check, so far, one question too many might push him past even his considerable threshold for patience. He was holding down a wealth of dark, angry emotions, for Sookie's sake, but too much prodding might cause him to lose that grip, leading him to vent his frustration at the nearest target.

"I haven't questioned her about it yet. Nor did I mention it when I explained as much as I could about her past. It seems clear she can't read either of us and she mentioned nothing about 'hearing' the three donors she fed from last night. But she might have been too distracted by her first hunger to notice."

Pam nodded at her Maker's possible explanation. She remembered all too well, even centuries later, the overwhelming thirst that consumed one the first night, rendering thought and even dignity moot until it was satisfied.

"I want you to head back to Shreveport before us." Eric continued. "Secure two donors for Sookie and one for myself. I'll question her subtly after she feeds again, but if she shows no signs of being able to hear them then I am content to let it be. We don't need to add any more stress to this situation than we already have by attempting to bring out her former gift."

Pam could only agree. That seemed the best course of action to her too. They would have to tell Sookie eventually, of course, but right now she didn't need to feel like there was anything else damaged about her.

"What about the King? How will he react when you tell him her telepathy did not survive the turning?" Eric growled at that and Pam feared she might have crossed the thin line with her last words, but when he answered her there was only icy determination in his voice.

"Sookie was,_ is_, my bonded and my wife. My right to turn her is indisputable. Felipe has no right to punish me, whether her telepathy remains or not. However, I do not expect him to be happy about it if she has lost her ability. We will simply have to keep a close eye on things. If he seeks retribution for my actions he will do so covertly, probably through Victor, who we already know is a threat."

Before Pam could let her worry and curiosity lead her to ask another foolhardy question, Sookie emerged from the darkened hallway to stand at the end of the couch.

Pam took that as the sign for her to get on her way and gave Eric a small nod of her head as she rose from the couch. "I'll be waiting for you at your house," were her parting words, before speeding out the front door.

"I'm done." Sookie said when she and Eric were once again alone. She was only carrying one small duffel bag with her. It could not have contained more than a few pieces of clothing and toiletries and Eric felt his eyebrow rise in surprise.

"Are you sure that's all you want to take with you? You're jewelry box contains many pieces belonging to your grandmother and mother. The books in the large bedroom are your favorites, but there are others out here," he gestured to the small set of shelves against the far wall, "you are quite fond of as well. We can take anything you'd like to bring with you."

Sookie just looked at him for a moment, the confusion clear on her face.

"You said to bring what I wanted. I don't want any of these things. They don't mean anything to me." She answered plainly, no emotion in her voice. "I would have been done sooner, but it took me a while to find a bag."

Eric wanted to protest that she might want them later, but realized it would only agitate her if he pressed the matter further. Nodding his head, resisting the desire to gather the things he knew 'his Sookie' would want, he rose from the couch and took her hand.

"Let's be off then."

Sookie seemed to agree but gave the room one final glance. Eric hoped that perhaps she'd changed her mind about taking a few more things, but when she looked at him again her only question was about Pam.

"That woman is your other child…Pam, right?" She spoke Pam's name after a moment of searching her memory. Eric knew from the way she'd phrased the question that she didn't remember her friend. She'd only been quickly replaying their earlier conversation, scanning her memories for the correct name.

"Yes, she's gone on ahead to make sure there are donors waiting for us at my home. I can sense your hunger returning and I do not wish you to be uncomfortable." Sookie smiled slightly.

"Thank you. I hadn't realized it until now, but you're right, I am starting to get hungry again." Eric leaned down and kissed her hair.

"Then come. I will make sure that someone trustworthy closes the house. If you wish to return for anything later it will be here waiting for you."

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

They spent the drive to Shreveport in silence, Sookie's hunger ratcheting up with every passing mile. By the time they finally parked in Eric's garage he knew she was trying to keep from bouncing her knee in agitation. When they entered the house, Eric spared only a moment to ask Sookie to take her shoes off, and as she did he spoke to her firmly, but without command.

"There are three donors in the living room." He knew she'd already smelled them because her hands had begun to tremble as she untied the laces of her tennis shoes. "You may have two of them. But you must feed responsibly. You will not be allowed out of the house until you can stop yourself before you take too much. Do you understand?" Sookie's eyes were already clouding over with hunger when she straightened from her task, but she nodded her head in indication that she'd heard him.

"Good."

They moved into the living room and, as it was last night, Eric saw Pam had brought three Humans who were all clearly not Fangbangers, and who were very glamoured. He still felt a little niggle of guilt, hearing the voice of 'his Sookie' chastising him in his head for taking from the unwilling, and tried once more to tamp down on his sorrow that she would make no such reprimand. The woman next to him, practically quivering with her hunger, was completely uncaring of how her meal had been procured, or in what way. She simply desired to devour the people in front of her.

Eric gestured for Sookie to take her pick. This time there were two petite women and one tallish man. They were nondescript, neither excessively attractive or particular ugly, but all clean smelling and of common blood types. Sookie again, without hesitation, chose the two women, feeding from both with zest, but stopping this time without needing to be commanded.

As Sookie took from the second donor, Eric pulled the young man close and bit into his neck from behind. The two of them watched each other over the bodies of the Humans between them, and Eric could feel Sookie's lust rising with his own. No matter what had happened, the sight of her feeding, her delicate fangs buried in the soft neck of another woman, was his darkest, most erotic fantasy come true, and he found himself panting just as heavily and unnecessarily as she was when they both released their dinners.

Without needing to be told, Pam ushered the still glamoured Humans out of the house. The lock on the kitchen door had barely clicked when Eric and Sookie met each other in the middle of the room, colliding with all the force of two heavenly bodies. She was in his arms, most of their clothes scattered on various pieces of furniture before Eric even realized what they were doing. The instinct was so primal, the need so absolute it rendered all else inconsequential, and he knew he could not blame her entirely for it. It was not just her who needed, not just her who wanted with an animal-like single-mindedness.

Every instinct he possessed was begging him, ordering him, to forget for just a little while. To stop thinking and worrying, hoping and despairing, and lose himself in the lush curves of the woman he adored. To bury himself in her soft, tight wetness and give and take the pleasure he knew fulfilled him, like nothing else ever had.

A part of him, a small part in the back of his mind, told him he should stop. That if, _when_, she remembered she might very well be angry with him for taking advantage of her in this way. But another part, a much larger part, was reminding him: she was a newborn Vampire. Sex was no less necessary to her than blood and despite her inability to remember she still favored him, preferred him to any other.

If he denied her would she be able to suppress her needs or would she seek relief with someone else? He couldn't bear the thought of it. The very idea of her in the arms of another, fucking away her lust, made him sick with jealousy and disgust. She was HIS! She'd chosen him, whether she remembered or not.

Banishing the churning worry, Eric let himself give into their need and took her repeatedly, reenacting the primal destruction they'd wreaked on her living room the night before, in his own. No piece of furniture remained safe, no corner of the room unscathed from their passion, but in the end, as he held her in what would now be their underground chamber, he found himself feeling…hollow.

It was not that their sex had been unsatisfying or her voracious passion undesirable. If anything the physical pleasure they'd given each other was even greater than that they'd shared when she was Human. As a Vampire, she was open to and unashamed of any act as long as it felt good. It was that, alongside the primal instinct and unrestrained yearning to quench her hunger, there was nothing else, no love, no affection…nothing.

No matter how hard he took her, no matter how wildly they mated, there was always love for her swelling his heart, suffusing his every action. But for him, she felt only blinding lust and the devotion all children felt for their Makers. And he had felt it as clearly as he felt her nails raking his back and chest, or her legs nearly crushing his hips as she orgasmed. In losing her memories of their life together she had lost her love for him too.

"Why can't I drain the Humans?" She asked breaking through his morose revere, her voice soft and filled with a wholesome curiosity that was chilling considering she was asking him why he wouldn't let her murder the innocent. He looked down at the tiny figure lying contentedly in his arms and steeled himself to answer a question he had never believed she would ask. Given that he could feel she cared nothing now for the moral wrongness of the act he chose to answer her pragmatically instead.

"For many thousands of years Vampires lived in the shadows. Hiding from Humans and living our existences in secret. It allowed us more freedom to revel in our inherent nature, but it had many pitfalls as well. Our government, our Vampire government, felt that with the advances in Human technology we would be discovered by them all too soon and so to prevent our being hunted to extinction they decided we should reveal ourselves.

Humans believe we can survive on the blood substitutes, which are now available, and because of this, they have allowed us to exist beside them. If we were to kill with impunity that would not continue for long. They would turn on us, and while we are stronger than they are, there are more of them and they are able to walk about during the day while we are defenseless.

It is for our safety, yours, mine and every other Vampire, that we do not kill without necessity. You must never kill a human for a meal, Sookie. There will be many times in your life to come when murder will be necessary and justified, and you will have every right to revel in it. But you must never do it simply for food or for sport. The ramifications for both of us would be dire." He watched while she digested that.

His words of practicality warred with her very strong desire for blood and he realized she was…curious about what it would feel like to drain a Human. Her thoughts neither repulsed nor disgusted him. As a very young Vampire, a thousand years in the past, he had killed many Humans simply for the fun of it, some not even for food.

Ocella had allowed it, even encouraged it as a way to get him to move past his humanity. To this day, especially when he was forced to put up with the unwashed and adoring hordes who crowded Fangtasia, hoping to be his meal for the night, he still sometimes felt the compulsion to murder for its own sake. At times he could even convince himself he'd be doing humanity a favor by it. Ridding the world of one more worthless sheep, before it had the chance to sully the gene pool with its mediocrity.

He could hardly blame her for her curiosity or her instinctive drives and he felt no desire to judge her for it, but it was one more reminder of the fact the woman in bed beside him might look and smell like his wife, might feel and taste like her, but she was not her. He held a stranger in his arms, who only resembled his beloved in the most superficial of ways.

It taunted him that if he had made her even a decade ago none of this would have bothered him. He would never have taken the chance of knowing her before turning her. And though he was sure he would still have judged her worthy of the gift of immortality, having no memory of her previous life would only have aided in adjusting to her new one.

He remembered, with crystal clarity, the few times when Pam, born to be a Vampire if ever a Human was, had slipped into depressions of varying severity when something or someone would randomly remind her of the friends and family who she'd left behind. She never missed her parents, who refused to accept Pamela was a square peg in the very best of ways (strong minded, intelligent, free thinking and adventurous) and continued to try to pound her into the round hole of acceptable behavior for a woman of society in her time. But she'd mourned the loss of her older brother, who she'd loved dearly and who had been the one to secretly provide her with the books and tracts which had opened her mind as a young woman. She'd also mourned her dearest friend whom Eric later found out Pam had 'experimented' with from time to time during her formative years.

Sookie would have none of those issues. She was free to embrace life as Vampire without the emotional journey of leaving her humanity behind. And yet, the fact remained it was not a decade ago. He had known and loved this woman for longer than he was comfortable admitting and now, she was just…gone.

She had cared nothing about killing Merlotte, even though Eric told her the shifter was one of her dearest friends. She didn't wish to even look through the books that she had worked so hard to obtain, or the jewelry her mother and grandmother had left to her. She didn't even care enough to bring much of her clothing, which she'd always liked despite its humble origins. All of it: her friends, her family, her home, her life, they meant less to her now than a pile of rubble. Was she not even the least bit curious to know who she'd been?

Eric knew, if he went round and round like this for even another minute, he would probably give himself his first headache in a thousand years. So he pushed one more niggling worry down with all the rest and asked her the truly important thing he needed to know before the sun rose again.

"When we walked into the house tonight and you smelled the donors in the living room, did you know they were here in any other way?" Sookie, who was already beginning to feel the pull of the imminent dawn, looked up at him drowsily and he could tell she was searching for an answer to what seemed a peculiar question. After a moment she shrugged her shoulders and gave him a curious stare.

"I heard their hearts beating and their breathing." She answered him.

"And when you were drinking from them, did you hear them say anything at all?" Again his answer was met by a wide-eyed look and incomprehension.

"They didn't say anything." She answered him. Her telepathy had either not survived the turning or her shields had been strengthened to the point she would not have to work at blocking the thoughts of others out any longer, but as she did not remember being a telepath she would have no idea how to lower them.

"True." Was all he said, before laying a gentle kiss to her lips. She returned it with vigor but then broke off to yawn adorably. Eric couldn't help but smile at the little bit of 'real Sookie' that had just shone through. "Sleep lover, we will have a full night when you rise again."

Sookie nodded and let the coming sunrise take her, going limp in Eric's arms, blissfully unaware of all the very unsettling things he'd thought, and felt, about her that night. He would be fine, he told himself as he slid down to lie wrapped around her completely, burying his face in her sweet smelling hair. They would both be fine. All it needed was time and that they had in spades.


	8. Chapter 8

_**A/N:**__ Just want to thank everyone who's been reviewing this story, alerting it and putting it in their favorites. I'm so grateful! _

_A few people wondered if Sookie would be meeting Bill again and how she would respond to him now that she can't remember any of the awful stuff he did to her. He's in this chapter and the next. I hope you enjoy what I think 'no telepathy and no memory' Sookie's reaction would be!_

_A HUGE thank you as always to my awesome beta, __**Northman Maille**__. Words cannot express my love or my devotion for all you do!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I don't own them…._

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

The sensation of life returning to her body was strange to say the least. If it hadn't been for the sudden jolting feeling that made her gasp as she became aware again, Sookie wouldn't have known any time had passed since she'd closed her eyes that morning. To the right of her she heard a small chuckle and turned to see Eric lying next to her, one arm curved protectively around her as he sat against the headboard, the other lifting a bottle to his lips.

"You'll get used to it as time passes," he said, taking a swig of the bottle as he pulled the arm around her away, "in a few weeks it won't feel shocking anymore."

As Sookie sat up, resting her head against his chest and nuzzling her body against him, uncaring of how the sheet fell past her naked hips, he handed her a bottle identical to his.

"What is it?" She asked, sniffing the thing curiously and cringing at the stench that greeted her. She wanted to feel indignant when he again chuckled at her reaction but she could feel he was calm and happy this evening and it made her feel the same. She liked having him content and all to herself. If it could be like this always she'd be more than happy to be the source of his amusement.

"It's called _True Blood_. It's one of the synthetic substitutes I told you about last night." He answered, tipping his bottle back and making no secret of his own distaste for the sludgy liquid inside. The face he made, which she was sure matched her own from just moment before, made her feel better.

"It smells gross." She said, sniffing again. She could feel her hunger rising but still she hesitated to try what he'd given her. It didn't smell much better than the shifter from last night, and she was sure it would taste equally foul.

"It is but it will take the edge off of your hunger until we get to Fangtasia and you can have something better." He kissed her head affectionately when he saw she was still putting off taking a taste even though she was most definitely becoming more and more thirsty with each passing second. "I'm sorry lover, truly, but you'll have to get used to drinking it, in public at least sometimes, better to get over your revulsion now."

Sighing in the most put upon way, she tipped the bottle back. The flavor was every bit as disgusting as Sookie had been expecting, but when the viscous fluid touched her throat she found herself unable to stop drinking. Eric was right, no matter how bad it was, it took the edge off her need, enough to stay sane until something tastier was available.

"Please tell me we're going to Fangtasia soon. I don't think I can stomach another one." The face she made as she licked her lips was part starved and part revolted all at the same time and it made Eric smile all the more.

"Indeed. We only need to shower and dress and we'll be on our way. Come." He said, taking her empty bottle and putting it on the night table next to his.

As they stepped into the shower, the warm water beating down on them, Sookie let out a moan of pleasure.

"The water feels wonderful." She sighed, wrapping her arms around his waist as the showerhead rained torrents of wet warmth down on their heads.

Eric felt himself growing hard as he watched her lift her head to the spray, neither needing nor missing the necessity of breathing. She didn't know it, but it had been yet another of his fantasies when she'd still been Human, to hold her like this, under the water, to watch the droplets cut paths down her delectable body and know they could stay like that forever, if only they had the time.

Taking her upturned chin between his fingers he leaned down and claimed her mouth with passion. He swallowed her small noise of surprise as she moved her arms from his waist to wind their way around his neck, returning his kiss eagerly. They stood there for long minutes, entwined, giving and taking from each other with ardent fervor.

Ignoring the acute throb of pain at what was missing between them, Eric concentrated on how physically right it felt to be this way with her. How she instinctively melted against him. How, even without her memories, she still somehow knew where each and every one of his spots where and used them to drive him to the brink of insanity.

His Sookie, she was in there somewhere. He could feel it with surety as their lips moved against each other ravenously. She just needed to find her way back to the surface. He could wait. As long as he could wake up to her like this, each and every night, as long as he could hold her and kiss her and feel her pressed against him as she was right now, he could be patient. Sookie was worth it. He'd already waited a thousand years for her. He wouldn't give up on her, on them, now. He could love enough for the both of them until she returned to him fully.

Lifting her up against the shower wall, feeling her legs wrap tightly around him, he pushed into her. The deep cry of ecstasy she gave as he entered her echoed off the bathroom tiles and drove his desire to a fever pitch.

"Sookie," Eric groaned as he finally broke away from her mouth, leaving a trail of hungry nips across her jaw and down to her collar bones, "my Sookie."

"Yes," she panted, not even aware that she had begun to breathe, every inhale perfectly timed to one of his deep thrusts, every exhale to his frenzied withdrawals. "Always, always yours." She sighed, her lips in his hair, laying fervent kisses there as her fingers tangled into the long, wet strands.

"I love you." He growled as his mouth made its way lower, taking one of her perfect, hardened nipples between his teeth and biting just enough to make her cry out again as she writhed against him. "I love you with everything I am." He whispered to her, kissing a trail to her other breast, licking the water from the soft swell before taking that one as well. "I need you more than blood." He groaned, giving one final hard thrust before they both fell to pieces, their fangs sinking into each other's necks and drinking greedily.

Sookie made no response to his declarations of love and need but as he saw the blissful smile she gave him while he set her back down on her feet, he felt his resolve strengthen. Time… time was all it needed and everything would be perfect, just as they'd dreamed it would be. For now he needed only to be concerned with the immediate worries of the evening. The first of which was explaining how she must behave when they arrived at Fangtasia.

"You remember that I told you I am Sheriff of this area, yes?" He asked as they began to dress, he in his typical uniform of tight dark jeans and a red Fangtasia t-shirt and she in a halter dress of the same cranberry color, which Pam had put in the closet for her.

"Yes." She nodded, as she turned her back to him and held up her hair so that he could finish raising the zipper for her.

"As my wife and bonded child, you are first among the Vampires under my authority. This means they are in your service as much as they are in mine. All who owe me fealty owe the same respect and obedience to you. You must be gracious and even handed with them but no more. You may be a newborn but when we are in this area you bow to no one but me. Pam is my second as well as my child, therefore the pecking order is me, you, then Pam and everyone else under her, ranked by their age."

As they finished dressing and left the house Eric explained the intricacies of Sookie's position and how he wished her to conduct herself. He could tell she was feeling slightly intimidated by it all but that she was ready and willing to rise to the task. It made him proud. She was dealing with so much and she was handling it all with the grace and the strength he knew his Sookie was capable of.

A half hour later Eric ushered Sookie into his office to find Pam waiting for them behind his desk, compact in hand, preening over her hair.

"I take it you had a good start to your evening?" Eric asked her as he hung his jacket behind the door.

"Marvelous actually, I found a wonderful new salon, Death by Fashion, that just opened up. I was skeptical at first, even with the fabulous name, but the stylist, Immanuel, clearly knows what he's doing." She replied turning slightly so that she could see herself in profile in her little mirror.

"I'm surprised you'd try a new place, I thought you were happy with your old one." Eric replied, slightly shocked that he was encouraging her to continue the conversation.

On any other night he wouldn't have taken the risk of asking Pam about anything to do with her hair, make up, or dress. Such a mistake usually ended in his having to listen to hours of inane prattle about hemlines, seasonal colors or heel height that boiled down to little more than 'bla bla bla' in his opinion. But tonight he found Pam's predictability …comforting. It was reassuring to know that some things never changed.

"Normally I wouldn't, but it just so happens that Immanuel's sister runs the front desk for him." At the memory of the girl, Pam's fangs ran out just a little bit and Eric couldn't help the eyebrow that shot into his hairline.

"You were willing to risk _your hair_ to speak to a receptionist?" Snapping the compact shut Pam hit him straight on with a fangy leer.

"Trust me Eric, three years ago you'd have been lining up to let them wax every precious blond hair from your body for the chance to drink this one. Lucky for me I don't have to worry about calling dibs anymore." This time he couldn't hold back an amused snort.

"So happy my finding love has finally done something for you." Pam's only answer was a snort of her own, but it was clear nothing he said was going to ruin her good mood tonight.

He wished he could say the same for himself. But he had a feeling the next few minutes were going to be anything but pleasant for him. Turning to Sookie, who had been watching their exchange with quiet curiosity, he held out his hand.

"Pam why don't you take Sookie to your office and show her Compton's database while I make some calls, she'll need to know who all the Vampires of Area five are as well as those in his Majesty's service. Then we can head out to floor." Pam nodded, motioning for Sookie to follow her.

Once the two women were gone, Eric sat behind his desk and took one long calming breath before picking up the phone. It rung three times before being answered by the annoyingly efficient voice of Sandy Seacrest.

"Sheriff Northman, what can I do for you tonight?" She asked without preamble.

"Sandy, I need to speak to his majesty regarding a matter of importance." He could hear the sounds of Sandy flipping through what must have been an appointment book and wondered, offhandedly, if she'd only been turned because her maker required a perpetual executive assistant. She seemed to have no other purpose in her undead existence beyond being the faithful girl Friday. He'd bet she even scheduled her feed and fucks into two perfectly timed fifteen minute 'coffee breaks' each night.

"He's very busy tonight Sheriff, perhaps I can have him call you back tomorrow around…eleven fifteen. What should I tell him you need to discuss?" It was moments like these when he almost missed Andre, a truth he'd rather not think on too closely, but at least under the old regime he'd never had to waste time proving he was calling for a good reason.

"I need to speak with him now Sandy and the reason is my new bonded child, Sookie Stackhouse." There was a long pause on the other end, during which he was sure he heard a put upon sigh followed by more page turning, and then Sandy's request that he hold while she transferred him to the King's office.

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

"That's Bill Compton?" Sookie stared at the last Vampire Pam needed to show her with an expression of incredulity.

"Hmm, I know…it's proof there's no justice in this world. How someone like Bill Compton can be given the gift of immortality while Coco Chanel rots in the ground, I'll never understand." Pam replied shaking her head while pretending to brush a tear from her eye.

"Eric said…he said Bill was my first love. But he's…he's just so…DULL looking. What could I ever have seen in someone like… _that_?" Pam couldn't help the unladylike bark of laughter that escaped her as Sookie pointed at the picture on the screen, her face a mask of genuine horror.

"You really aren't the same." Pam had known since last night, of course, but it felt like the reality of the situation had just sunk in for her. While she found Sookie's new distaste for the blisteringly mediocre Vampire to be an encouraging improvement over the telepath's former maudlin moaning, it made it all the clearer that this person in front of her wasn't the woman she'd grown so fond of over the last years. At least not any part of her that Sookie had allowed to reach the surface.

_Just like Eric_, she found herself thinking. It hurt slightly to realize that even though the situations were different the results were the same. Pam could still remember the deep ache she'd felt in her heart when she saw her normally strong, arrogant and completely in control maker clinging to Sookie's leg like a lost little boy.

That man had looked like Eric, had worn his face and spoken with his voice, but he hadn't been Eric any more than this girl was Sookie. She remembered the fright she felt that Eric might never remember himself and by extension her, and she remembered the frenzy she'd gone into to find the witch who'd done it to him so he could return to himself.

Sookie might not have been her Maker but she had been Pam's only friend in the centuries since she'd been made. She had become very dear to the normally cold and proudly unfeeling Vampire and Pam realized that it hurt in a very similar way to be again staring at a stranger inhabiting the body of someone she cared for. Only this time there was no witch to hunt down and no spell to break. There was no plan to fix the problem and no guarantee that the person she knew as Sookie would ever come back.

"Was the other me so much better?" Sookie replied instantly indignant, not knowing or caring what Pam had been thinking. It felt like a slap in the face to realize that this was apparently one more person who would be disappointed in her very existence.

She'd been trying so hard to remember, to make anything come back to her, knowing that her Maker felt such sorrow over her losing her memory, but she couldn't. She couldn't remember anything and she was becoming increasingly more upset with every reminder that she was somehow lacking or less than because of it.

"I don't know." Pam said her voice level and her tone neutral once more. No matter how much of a shock it was, it would do no good to mourn Sookie's lost memories one way or the other, she told herself firmly. Either they would return or they wouldn't, but for the foreseeable future the Vampire standing in front of her was her sister and in desperate need of care and affection. "I suppose I'll have to get to know you before I can make that decision, won't I?" Her answer caught Sookie off guard.

"I'd like that." She said after a moment, hope in her voice.

"As would I." Was Pam's simple reply. The two women smiled at each other then, Pam's offer of friendship and acceptance understood and gratefully reciprocated.

"Are we ready to go out to the floor?" Eric asked as he walked through the door, a scowl on his face.

"Your call to King DeCastro went that well?" Pam asked, straightening from her position crouching over the computer as Sookie sat in her chair.

"It could have gone worse." Was all Eric would volunteer as they walked out of Pam's office.

They stopped right in the doorway to the main bar area and Sookie could neither prevent it nor hide it when her fangs came slamming down. The room was filled with over two hundred Humans, all reeking of sweat, sex, fear and desperation, and the smell of it invaded Sookie's senses like fist to her gut.

She couldn't tell if she liked the smell or not. There was blood out there, a great deal of it, but it was hiding under so many unappetizing odors that it reminded her of the true blood she'd had to drink earlier in the night.

After a moment, in which Eric gauged whether or not Sookie would be able to control herself in such a large crowd of people, the three of them walked over to Eric's booth and sat down.

One of the waitresses was in front of them even before they were sitting and Eric had her bring them three True Bloods. When Sookie groaned at the thought of ingesting another one of the vile bottles she felt Eric's hand begin to rub up and down her thigh.

"Have one to take the edge off and then we'll choose two you like and I'll teach you how to glamour them." Eric said, squeezing Sookie's thigh in reassurance.

Sookie took the drink reluctantly and began to sip at it, happy because after drinking one earlier in the evening and having some of Eric's blood, she didn't feel compelled to slam it back. As they drank Eric told them about the call he'd made to the King.

"I don't understand. Why is he so angry that you turned me?" Sookie asked when he was finished. The look that passed between Eric and Pam at her question was not lost on her. Nor was the subtle nod that Pam gave Eric before he began to speak.

"Lover, there is something that I did not tell you last night. I felt that you didn't need any further stress, but it is something I think would be unwise to keep from you any longer." Sookie swallowed another small sip of her True Blood and nodded, scared suddenly of what could be worse than having lost all of her previous life. "The reason I asked you last night if you'd heard the donors we fed from is that before you're turning you were a mind reader."

Eric wasn't sure what kind of reaction he'd expected from Sookie, but it hadn't been anything as calm or quiet as the thoughtful examination she was giving the label on her True Blood bottle. He tried to use the bond to determine what she might be thinking but her emotions were more even then they had been at any time since she'd first risen. He was certain he was feeling more anxiety from Pam than he was from Sookie as the both of them watched the new made Vampire digest this piece of information. Finally after long moments of silence Sookie looked up at him with an expression of equanimity.

"I don't think I would have liked that very much. I'm glad it's gone." She said with certainty before taking another small sip of her blood.

She knew she'd shocked both of her companions but she was grateful to Pam for a second time that night when the Vampire, who she was beginning understand handled almost everything with a sort of snarky sarcasm, raised her own barely touched bottle of blood in toast.

"Cheers to that." Pam clinked her bottle to Sookie's and the two of them looked over at Eric, expectantly, waiting to see how he would respond.

It wasn't even a moment longer before he broke into a wide smile as well and added his bottle to the others. Eric knew she'd always loathed her telepathy, if that was still the case and she was happier without it, than he could only be happy about it too.

Before they could be happy for too long though, the front door to the club opened and Eric turned just in time to see three people he could have happily gone the rest of his existence without seeing again: Merlotte, Bill Compton, and coming in behind them with all the haughty arrogance of a King, Victor Madden.


	9. Chapter 9

_**A/N:**__ Thanks so, so much to everyone who's been reviewing this story! I'm really not trying to earn the title of "cliffhanger queen" I swear! The cliffies just keep happening. I am however trying to earn the angst tag on this story -with honors, so in service of that I give you Victor's visit._

_HUGE thanks to my beta, __**Northman Maille**__. Thank you for the editing, for the sound boarding and for all of your patience with me. I heart you big time!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing… irrationally perhaps, I'm just less fond of some characters than others so I'm taking the golden opportunity to 'cull the herd'._

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Eric was slightly shocked to hear the sounds of two ferocious growls coming from beside him. He'd expected such a reaction from Sookie after the way she'd behaved with Merlotte the night before, but he was surprised to see Pam in nearly the same state.

He could feel the higher brain functions of both of his children receding behind a wall of blood-soaked hatred, their aggressions feeding one another through their bonds with him. It took a thousand years of practiced self-control for him to close his eyes, for a single instant, and calm the raging need for murder battering him from both of his bonds, and from within as well. Murdering all three of their unwanted guests _would _be infinitely satisfying. The frenzied flight from torture and retribution and subsequent years spent hiding in some filthy hovel at the end of the Earth would not.

"Pam calm yourself and help Sookie." He bit out through clenched teeth, just loud enough for them to hear. With his words Pam seemed to return to herself and nodded contritely, shifting over to sit next to Sookie, sandwiching her between them as Merlotte, Compton and Victor approached their table.

Standing to his full height, towering over the entirety of Fangtasia's denizens, Eric painted his face with a smile of false graciousness. He had cautioned both his children to be calm but he would be damned if he remained sitting and had to look up meekly into the faces of three people who had so clearly made themselves his enemies.

"Victor," Eric said, inclining his head the very smallest amount that protocol would allow. "Merlotte," he continued looking blankly at Sookie's former employer. "Compton," he finally acknowledged Bill after a short but pointed pause.

Eric watched his former rival bristle at being acknowledged after a shifter. But he couldn't have cared less. If he'd thrown his lot in with either of the other two men the most Bill could hope for would be to walk out of Fangtasia with his miserable existence intact.

"Sheriff," Victor began in return. "Mrs. Northman, Pamela."

Though the expression on his face never changed Eric felt himself relax marginally. He felt the same easing of tension from Pam as well. Whatever Merlotte and Compton hoped to gain from bringing Victor to Fangtasia tonight (for he couldn't see any other reason for the three of them to be keeping company), it was clear to Eric they wouldn't get it. Not only had Victor addressed the Vampires before him in the proper order, but he'd acknowledged Sookie's status.

It was evidence that, while Victor was still an enemy to be closely watched, they were not in any immediate danger. Eric knew Victor wasn't a brave enough Vampire to challenge him outright, but even if he'd somehow grown a set between sending Bruno and Corrinna to their final deaths and now, he wouldn't have bothered with proper etiquette first. No it was more likely Victor was simply here to assess this new twist in the game. Using, what Eric assumed was Merlotte's cry baby tactic as an excuse to get a firsthand view of how the pieces now stood.

Once the unpleasant pleasantries were over, Eric gestured for all three of them to sit. It was a comical sight: Merlotte, who so hated Vampires, literally pressed shoulder to shoulder with two of them across the too small table. Eric imagined there would be hot showers and a good deal of hard scrubbing in all three of their immediate futures.

"Eric, forgive me for taking up your time, but I had no choice. These two gentlemen have brought serious allegations against you." Victor said it all with an air that was supposed to appear solemn, but it was clear he already knew all this would amount to nothing. "I can see plainly that at least part of what I've been told is true, your wife is now a Vampire.

Mr. Merlotte believes it was done unwillingly and contacted Bill to get help going through the appropriate channels. Bill, as a good servant of his King and his state, felt there was no choice but to contact me, as your superior, with this claim. What do you have to say for yourself?"

Eric stifled the desire to laugh as he felt the very strong urge to kick Madden in the shin coming from Pam. He hadn't looked closely at her footwear tonight, but he would have bet the bar she was wearing something that would have resulted in Madden's lower leg coming away with her heel.

"As you can see for yourself Victor, Sookie is here with us, out in the open. I have nothing to hide and neither does she." He knew it was a serious gamble betting Sookie could control herself enough to keep the secret of her memory loss, but she hadn't failed him yet.

She'd kept her wits about her enough not to betray the truth to Merlotte last night and he felt sure she could do it again. As she sat next to him now, she moved not an inch nor made a single facial tick that would give anything away and he felt her understanding of what he needed from her.

"As I explained to _Mr._ Merlotte last night, Mr. Madden, this was my decision. No one has done anything to me against my will and I have no desire to leave my husband." She no longer felt the love she'd had for him before her turning, but Eric could feel the truth of her statement clearly. She wanted to be with him and she was in no way unhappy about her state of being.

"That doesn't necessarily prove anything Eric, as well you know." Victor countered smoothly, one eyebrow raised in challenge. "You could have commanded her as her maker to say such a thing if questioned."

Eric felt Sookie stiffen at Victor's insinuation, and the implied insult to his honor, even as she held on hard to her composure. Placing a hand on her thigh, under the table, he sent her more calm.

"Victor you have heard my wife tell you plainly there is no foul play here. If you are still unsure though I would be happy to get his Majesty, whom I informed of Sookie's turning earlier this evening and who is in full support of my claim as her Maker, on the line. This way you can hear it for yourself before interfering again in matters that are between her and I." Eric paused for dramatic effect, pinning Victor with a gaze as cold and hard as steel. "It might be best all around if I did so. I doubt his Majesty will look kindly on a second such lapse in judgment on your part."

It was another gamble. The King had acknowledged Sookie was Eric's to do with as he pleased. She was Eric's bonded and wife by Vampire law, he _could_ do nothing else overtly, but he was also greatly displeased at the loss of his telepath. Still, Eric was willing to wager DeCastro would rather keep him happy as Sheriff, loyally serving him half a continent away in a newly won Kingdom, than support his Lieutenant who had proved to be scheming for more power behind his back.

It seemed Victor agreed with his assessment of the situation as well because the Vampire nodded infinitesimally, conceding the night's back and forth to Eric, before rising from his seat with a grating chuckle.

"It seems my work here is done. I thank you Sheriff for your time." Eric merely inclined his head slightly once again, his face never changing expression. Unfortunately, it seemed Victor's unlikely bedfellows were either incredibly dense or simply daft.

"What, that's it?" Merlotte exclaimed loud enough for the entire bar to hear. It's likely he would have said more but he was cut off summarily by Victor.

"Indeed it is. I see no reason to press the matter further. You have made your complaint, I have heard and seen for myself it is untrue. I would suggest you listen to Mrs. Northman as well and let the matter drop." With that Victor turned on his heel getting ready to leave.

"I thank you, for your time as well Victor. Although you will forgive me for wondering how it is you are in my area tonight to see to this allegation personally?" It was the one thing that had been niggling at the back of Eric's mind throughout their entire conversation.

In response Victor just chuckled with obvious false good humor.

"Ah yes, it was a stroke of good luck that I could be here to put these issues to rest so quickly. A happy coincidence really, I'm thinking of purchasing some real estate in the area and happened to be looking over some of my options personally tonight.

My day man is as competent as one can expect a Human to be, but I don't like to leave such matters entirely in his hands." With that Victor's pretense of affability melted away all together. "I realize that my new subjects are still adjusting to my rule so I will let it slide this time, but let me make it clear now Sheriff Northman, from this moment on there are no more turnings without my prior approval. Make sure your people understand this."

Having seen what he needed to see and asserted his paltry authority Victor swept out with as much pomp as he'd arrived, leaving Merlotte and Compton on their own. Both of whom suddenly looked decidedly less confident about their positions. Realizing he'd get nothing more than a beating if he remained much longer, Merlotte was up and out the door after one last disgusted look. But of course Compton simply couldn't let it lie.

"Eric you have my apologies." He immediately began back peddling. "Sam came to me in quite a bit of distress. I feared he would go to the Human authorities with his wild accusations and thought contacting Victor would be better for everyone involved."

"If you want to live long enough to feel the pull of sunrise you'll leave now Compton. And don't think for a moment this will be forgotten." Eric growled.

If Bill could have blanched he would have. Given that he was so gray already though, he merely managed to look as close to wetting his pants as any Vampire could. Standing gracelessly he looked down at Sookie, something akin to grief in his eyes.

"Sookie, sweetheart is this really what you want? When Sam told me…I just couldn't imagine you ever choosing this existence." His voice was every bit as lovesick and forlorn as it always was when he spoke to her, but for once she didn't reply with her usual kind forbearance. Before Eric could step in, she snorted derisively and shook her head in disgust.

"God, you're even _more _pathetic in person." There was silence from around the table at that. Pam and Eric trying to keep their faces from betraying their panic as Bill looked at her with a palpable mixture of hurt and puzzlement.

"Leave now Compton!" Eric growled at him, standing from his seat and taking one menacing step towards the younger Vampire.

With one last look at each of them Bill turned, head hanging in defeat, and finally did as he was bade. The three of them sat tensely for another few moments before Pam broke the silence with her usual 'ladylike' grace.

"Ahhh, good times." She spat sarcastically. "Well Sookie, you might be different, but it appears some things never change." When Sookie's only response was to look at Pam with a raised eyebrow the elegant Vampire smiled back. "Nothing is ever dull when you're around!"

Before anything more could be said one of the waitresses approached their table. Bowing to them all she turned to Eric.

"You have a phone call Master, an Area Vampire needing your assistance." Eric nodded slightly, attempting to mask his weariness with the night, and turned back to Pam and Sookie.

"I'll take it in my office. Pam keep an eye on things out here." Both women nodded as he headed towards the back of the bar, leaving them to amuse themselves and the vermin.

"I'm sorry." Sookie apologized. "After all that, I went and opened my mouth without thinking first. He was just so…irritating!" Pam just shrugged her shoulders as though it was of no concern.

"If you had to slip in front of someone you couldn't have picked a more insignificant person than Compton. Felicia maybe," she said gesturing to the bartender, "but all things being equal I wouldn't worry about it. He's lucky Eric let him walk out of here with his pitiful little un-life and he knows it. He won't make any more problems."

Sookie nodded trying to feel better about the whole thing, but inside she was still seething, both over her mistake and over the incident in general. She didn't know who these people where, not really, but she hated them with a single-mindedness that left everything else blurring on the edges of her consciousness.

Before she could say anything else though, a noise from the other side of the room caught their attentions. A cat fight had broken out between the fangbangers over one of the other Vampires in the bar. Pam's first response was a put upon sigh.

"There might be blood, you'd better go back to Eric's office. I don't think it's time we tested your self-control quite that far." She said before heading over to break up the scuffle the male Vampire was only too happy let continue, since it was all about him.

Sookie stood up and walked back through to the employee's only section, but just as she neared Eric's door it dawned on her that she was alone for the very first time. Eric thought she was with Pam and Pam thought she was with Eric.

As Sookie turned slightly, heading instead for the employee exit at the end of the hall, her fangs slammed down in delight. She knew exactly what she intended to do with her unexpected free time.

Stepping outside Sookie breathed in the chill night air in heaving draughts. The scent she was looking for wasn't hard to find, even for one as inexperienced at hunting as she. The shifters stench literally hung in the air like the stink from an open sewer. Letting everything else fall away she broke into a run, following it.

Her heightened speed allowed her to catch up to the Shifter in little time, even with his head start. She paced his truck for several miles, waiting until the presence of other cars seemed to lessen and the tree line on either side of the highway became denser. When she felt sure they were unlikely to encounter any passersby she made her move, stepping out onto the road a hundred feet in front of the Shifter's car and holding out her hands.

She heard the tires screech to a halt on the thick asphalt as Sam swerved to avoid her, the front of his truck coming to a dead stop half in the mud. The car had barely stopped when he jumped out of it, his disbelief written all over his face.

"Sookie?" He called into the darkness.

Sookie worked hard to keep her fangs hidden as she allowed several scarlet, blood laced tears to fall from her blue eyes, which she rounded into a look of utter desperation.

"Oh Sam!" She cried as though she were heartbroken, rushing at a more human pace and throwing herself into his arms.

The shifter enfolded her in his embrace, allowing her to cry in seeming desolation. He petted her hair gently, laying kisses on the top of her head as he cooed nonsense to her.

"Oh Cher, I knew it couldn't have been what you wanted. I'm so sorry, darlin'. I'm sorry I didn't do a better job of protecting you. I knew that fucking fanger was no good for you! I knew he'd only hurt you." He told her, his own voice beginning to shake with the strength of his sorrow.

Whether he ever heard the snick of her fangs slamming down she didn't know. But she was quite sure he felt the fist that punched a hole through his stomach. She was also confident he felt, more than heard, the sickening crack of her breaking off one of his ribs and ripping it out of his body. The rest though, it might have been a blur to him given how much pain there was.

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

Eric slammed the phone back down onto its cradle nearly cracking the whole thing into pieces in his pique of annoyance. An hour, an entire hour spent in a conference call with two of his newer area Vampires, nest mates, over a dispute regarding a pet.

It had brought him closer to a berserker rage than when he'd been verbally sparing with Victor. They should be made to pay for the minutes of his existence, so uselessly wasted, that he would never get back.

One human was as worthless as the next. Why bother fighting over any of them when there were billions more on the planet? In his thousand years on this Earth he didn't think it was mere coincidence that he'd only encountered two humans worthy of respect or attention. Being smarter than either of the fools he'd just been made to suffer, he'd turned them both.

The thought of his women lured him back out to the bar. It made him feel immensely better that Sookie and Pam seemed to have resumed their friendship with little trouble. He loved them both, differently but completely, and it would have been difficult to watch them dislike each other when, if things had not gone wrong, they would have no doubt been as close as real sisters.

It was proof of how exceptional they both were. Sookie for handling everything with such strength and Pam for not allowing what must have been her own hurt, over Sookie's condition, to stand in the way of accepting her.

Walking out into the main room Eric found Pam sitting at their table by herself and slipped into the chair next to her with a raised eyebrow.

"Where is Sookie?" He asked even as his eyes scanned the bar, searching for his mate. His gaze settled back on Pam just in time to see her look of shock.

"What do you mean, where's Sookie?" She replied, panic creeping into her voice. "I sent her back to your office an hour ago. There was a fight between the vermin. I didn't want to risk the chance of one of them bleeding so close to her."

"Fuck!" Was all Eric said as he bolted out of his chair, turning it over in his sudden flare of temper.

He hadn't even noticed Sookie leaving he'd been so distracted by his musings over Victor's visit and the idiocy of his phone call. Closing his eyes he let his blood reach out, searching for her. He found her, far from the bar, almost all of the way to Bon Temps.

Pinning Pam with a final look of bloody displeasure he tore out of the club, taking to the sky.


	10. Chapter 10

_**A/N:**__ As always I wanted to thank everyone who's been reviewing, alerting and favoriting this story. I'm beyond grateful to you!_

_Thanks so much as well to my beta __**Northman Maille**__. You're such an ace and I'm totally fangirl/girl crushing on you!_

_So shall we see what happens to Sam? There was very mixed reaction to his fate. Some people thought he had it coming some people were hoping for an intervention. I promise it's all for a purpose!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…I'm just giving Sookie some anger management issues._

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As he drew closer to her, he felt himself nearly overpowered by the strength of her emotions. She was elated, satisfied, spent in the most primitive of ways. Had he not been a Vampire these thousand years her emotional state might have puzzled him, he might have mistook it for any number of other things. As it was he knew the way her blood sang and her body tingled, as though every single nerve ending was alive again, meant he was too late.

The sight that greeted him when he finally touched down on the lonely stretch of grass by the highway was unneeded confirmation. Sookie stood over the remains of a body, her hands, face, hair and dress stained in copious amounts of blood as she tossed an object up into the air and caught it repeatedly. The shape, smell and squishy sound the object made each time it came in contact with her hands left no doubt: it was the shifters heart she'd made a toy of.

She was aware of his presence, he knew this, but it was still unexpected when she turned to him, a giggle in her voice, and bid him to catch before tossing the organ at him. The thing touched his hand for only a second before finally splattering into a soggy mess and dripping from his fingers onto the dirt around his feet.

He took everything in as she began to walk slowly towards him. The ground was awash in yet more blood, the body was no longer intact, but the pieces of it that had been ripped off still lay close by, and the shifter's truck was just a few hundred yards behind them.

Still he said nothing as he watched her make her way to him. It took the restraint of ten centuries to do nothing more than drink her in with his eyes as her hips swayed seductively, her mouth and fangs dripped with blood, and her eyes glittered with the violent delight of her first kill. He had told her killing for sport was strictly forbidden, and yet hadn't Merlotte threatened to separate them? Had he not attempted to make good on his threat by bringing Victor to Fangtasia tonight?

At any other time in his history what she'd just done would be looked at as nothing more than the proper justice for attempting to interfere with a mated, bonded pair. At any other time it wouldn't have stopped with the foolhardy shifter, Compton too would have suffered a similar, but far more public, fate.

When she finally reached him they stood a moment just looking at each other. It was hard at first to tell what was coming from herself and what was coming from him, emotions, strong and charged, zinged along their bond so fast. But at length she could tell the conflict she felt was his. He was at war with himself over what she'd done and how he should react. His instincts told him one thing, his conscience another.

She knew he was proud of her. She hunted the shifter, lured him and finished him off all on her own after all. Yet she also sensed he was angry with her for sneaking away, perhaps for murdering after he told her she was not to purely for sport, maybe for something else too, she couldn't be sure. Jutting her chin out she spoke again, her eyes glittering not just with violence now but with defiance as well.

"I accept whatever punishment you think is fitting. He wouldn't have stopped causing problems for us. He deserved it and I'm not sorry." She would have said more, but before she could think of anything else, his mouth was on hers, his arms crushing her to him with such force that if she'd needed to breathe she would have passed out.

Giving in to his instincts for single moment, Eric licked the blood from Sookie's fangs and lips. He'd never been fond of the taste of shifter or were but when licked from her skin the blood took on a sweetness which made it very nearly perfect.

Sookie clung to him elated and excited all at once, plundering his mouth every bit as ferociously as he did hers. She knew this undercurrent she felt, this need for violence and blood was not something which existed solely in her. Being so closely connected to him she could feel the breadth and depth of his own darkness and she longed to bring it out, to revel in it together.

When they fed, when they mated, when they drank it seemed as though she could almost touch the beautiful darkness that lived inside of both of them, immerse herself in it, drown in its deliciousness. When he held her like this, took command of her body, as he did right now, and lost control of his own, she could almost touch something else as well: the place inside herself which was blank, the memories and the feelings that lived just beyond her reach.

She knew she'd loved him before her turning. She needed nothing and no one to tell her that. She was sure it wouldn't take very much for her to fall in love with him again. He was her Maker, her bonded, her lover and her mate, being with him, it was just…_right! _But as he pushed her away from his body suddenly, pulling his control firmly back around him and denying them what they both so desperately wanted, she knew she couldn't give her heart to him fully, because she no longer had his completely.

The woman he loved was the woman she'd been, not the Vampire she was now. The woman he longed for was the Human with morals and memories, not the creature who had rent a man apart, nearly limb from limb, only scant minutes before. No matter how much a part of him wanted to simply let go she knew he would not. There was a fear inside of him she didn't understand, but she could feel it as clearly as she could feel her arms or her legs, and it asserted itself now, putting a space between them she hated. When he spoke it was all sense and logic.

"We must clean this up before someone finds it." He said, his baser instincts once again tempered. "We will have words about the rest later."

With that he began to move at his fastest pace, putting the remains of the shifter in the cab of his truck and then ramming it with all of his might into one of the bigger trees standing just beyond where she'd killed him. When the car was suitably destroyed Eric opened the fuel door and dropped a lit match inside, before turning, grabbing her, and streaking further down the road.

The explosion was spectacular, a bright, hot, nearly white ball of flame that consumed the truck in only moments. To anyone who found it, the mess would look as though Merlotte had lost control of the car and skidded into a tree, causing his truck to catch fire. As the grassy ground around the truck caught as well, the blood staining it was consumed too. The Human authorities would have no evidence to show he'd been killed before being put into the car. It might not stop them from asking questions, but they would have no proof to back it up.

When Eric was sure there was nothing left to find, he shot into the sky with Sookie in his arms. Their flight back to Shreveport was silent, and though his face never wavered from its icy expression, Sookie could feel the tempest churning within him. His emotions were nearly as unstable as her own, careening from one extreme to another before shifting course. He was anxious, then determined, proud then angry, his love for her flickering on and off in the background the farther inside his own thoughts he went.

When they entered the house, the force with which he slammed the door behind them set the windows to rattling. Still he said nothing, choosing instead to walk right past her and down the stairs to their chamber.

"What will you do?" She asked finally, wishing he'd yell or break things… anything but continue on in his stony outward silence while his emotions continued to make her almost literally dizzy.

"Nothing." Was his single word reply as he began to shed his clothes, stained from moving the shifters remains and from holding her own soiled body against his. Walking past her yet again he stalked naked into the bathroom and started the shower.

"You said we'd have words, so have them!" She yelled as she followed behind him, not sure what else to do.

One second he was in front of her, his back to her, the next, faster than even her Vampire eyes could track he'd ripped the stained dress from her body and pulled her under the hot spray with him.

"You want words?" He spat at her. "What the fuck would like me to say? I have already explained to you that you cannot kill for pleasure! There was no direct threat, you did not lose your temper or your control, you waited for the moment to be in your favor and you struck. You killed simply to kill, after I TOLD you not to!"

Sookie felt his anger like a physical slap to the face but she would not back down from it. Wrenching her shoulders from his grasp, she felt her fangs slam down in fury.

"Don't be sanctimonious and don't pretend you give a shit about his life. He deserved it and you know it!" She spat back.

"No," he countered a sneer in his voice, his own fangs slamming down, "I don't give _a shit_ about the shifter, but I do give _a shit_ about you and me and the Vampires who owe me their fealty: all of whom you have jeopardized tonight with your little snit of temper!

Merlotte was seen and heard having an argument with us in public just hours before he mysteriously loses control of his car and careens off the road to his death. Who do you think they will suspect? I am Sheriff of this area, it is my duty to keep the peace between the races and order among my Vampires, and my own bonded child has murdered a prominent shifter over nothing! If you were any other Vampire I would put you in silver and starve you for a month for what you've just done!"

"Then do it! I told you I'd accept the punishment." She challenged.

The moment could easily have gone another way, but Eric had never struck someone weaker than himself before, and he had no intention of starting with his own wife. So instead, he pulled her to him, one hand fisting almost painfully into her hair, the other nearly crushing her hip, and slanted his mouth down hard on hers. If he could not give into his desire for violence then he would not fight his desire for her body a moment longer.

Their fangs clashed violently, their tongues fought each other for dominance as Sookie met him anger for anger, frustration for frustration. But for once it was she who broke them apart, gasping unnecessarily for air against the crushing force of the lust they felt for each other, but determined not to let it distract her from winning the argument.

"You're proud of what I did, why can't you admit it?" She asked, as her eyes nearly bore holes into his own.

The angry noise he let out was more like the howl of an enraged animal than any coherent sound a man might make, as it bounced off the shower tiles, and it would have cowed another. But she just couldn't let it be! Of all the character traits Sookie had possessed as a Human, the one that simply _had_ to survive her turning and memory loss intact was her apparent lack of self-preservation.

"BECAUSE YOU CANNOT KILL WHENEVER THE FANCY TAKES YOU!" He bellowed, pushed past any semblance of his usual patience or restraint.

"It wasn't just fancy! You said so yourself, he challenged you…publically. YOU," she hissed out the word," should have been the one to kill him!" Her voice suddenly went low and venomously cold, her implication that he'd failed both as a Maker and a leader clear.

Eric felt all the fight leave him at those words. They had been staring each other down the entire time, each one daring the other to look away first and concede defeat, each one obstinately refusing to. He did so now, lowering his eyes to shower floor, focusing on her dainty little feet where they stood toe to toe with his much larger ones.

"And so the story will go if anyone should ask." He sighed, feeling an exhaustion that had nothing to do with the physical need for sleep.

"What?"

"The Humans can be glamoured to believe the shifter's death was an accident, but should other supernaturals ask, the story will be that_ I_ killed him for challenging my right to you." The soul weary exhalation that accompanied his words seemed to deflate the last of her anger as well.

"But…." Sookie stared at him disbelieving.

"This is for your protection Sookie. Now say it." He ordered.

Sookie felt the force of his will, but knew she was not being commanded to obey. Eric wanted her to understand the gravity of the thing and to agree to it freely.

"You killed Merlotte." She parroted quietly, as she too lowered her face to the floor.

He nodded his approval to her and even though she didn't want to admit it, she began to feel something like remorse for what she'd done. Not because the shifter hadn't deserved his death and not because she hadn't enjoyed killing him, but because she realized she'd put her Maker in a terrible position.

She'd defied him and taken matters into her own hands. She'd done something he would ordinarily punish another for without a second thought. If word got out that he could not control his own child he would look weak, weaker than any petty challenge by Merlotte had made him seem. If he took responsibility for it instead, it would make him look petty, violent, possibly unstable, everything a leader should not be. But in order to protect her he would take the blame and the consequences of letting people believe_ he_ had been the one to act rashly.

Into her suddenly collapsing mood he poured pride through their bond.

"I always knew you'd make a ferocious Vampire." He whispered to her, lifting her face so their eyes could meet once more.

She knew he meant it to be a balm. She had done wrong, they would have to cover it up, but he _was_ proud of her, at least in part, for the strength and the cunning she'd shown tonight. Somehow though, it wasn't quite enough.

"And yet, you're_ so_ unhappy." Sookie's eyes searched his for a moment more, maybe hoping for answers, probably knowing she wouldn't like it if she got them. Then the sound of the curtain moving against the rod came and with a gust of air she was gone, leaving him alone in the shower.

When he emerged from the bathroom minutes later she was already lying on the bed, the covers pulled haphazardly to her waist, her back to him. It was still and hour and a little bit before dawn, but he could tell she hadn't succumbed to the sun's pull yet.

Easing in next to her, he pulled her against his body and although she said nothing, she came willingly. It was an insidious thing sometimes, the bonds they shared. It was almost as though those invisible but unbreakable ties compelled them to seek comfort and affection from each other, even when they were the cause of one another's misery.

And even when they made each other unhappy, as they'd just done, the feeling of skin touching skin, of arms and legs twining together, of her head falling back on his chest and their lips meeting half way between the space that had existed was like a palliative to all their ills.

For the first time since she'd risen to this life, their joining was soft…gentle. With no clothes hindering their movements, their hands explored each other. They caressed and enticed one another, hers dancing along his strong legs as they parted her thighs, coming to rest on the tight globes of his bottom as he positioned his body over her. His delighting in the dangerous curves of her hips before settling on the bountiful swells of her breasts, squeezing and plucking them as her torso rose to rub their sensitized peaks against his chest.

With dawn so close they both knew there was little time for the more exotic acts they'd indulged in over the last few nights, but it hardly mattered. The pleasure they both felt as he united their bodies, their mouths still fused together, was as unbelievable as it ever had been.

They moved together slowly…strongly, swallowing each other's cries as though the breathy, blissful sounds had the power to heal what was wrong between them. With each thrust of his long, sure thrusts she could believe the love he felt was truly for her, and not for the person she'd been, the person who was lost to them both. And with each squeeze of her exquisite tightness around his aching shaft he could almost convince himself that he wasn't trapped, loving each Sookie but unable to give himself to either of them fully and therefore failing them both.

They reached the peak together just moments before the sun broke free of the eastern horizon, their sounds of pleasure a single keening cry just before Sookie succumbed for the day and Eric willingly followed, still entwined and yet falling apart.


	11. Chapter 11

_**A/N:**__ We're going to do a little jump ahead in time right now, just to keep the momentum going, so this chapter starts 6 months after Sam's untimely demise._

_Thanks again so much to everyone who's been reading, reviewing, favoriting and alerting this story! Y'all ROCK!_

_And of course thanks so much to my beta, __**Northman Maille**__, for her rad editing skills and her ability to put up with my neurosis! _

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…_

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She'd followed the man for well over two hours before finally cornering him in a darkened alley behind an abandoned restaurant. She'd watched him change clothes, in his small apartment, after his work shift. She'd paced him at a distance as he made his way to the seedier section of Shreveport, and watched as he made the deals for small bags of white powder that actually brought him the bulk of his income. She'd shadowed him as he visited with one of the sickly looking women who stood on the street corners selling themselves for money. He'd never once noticed her presence even though she was always there.

Now, as the man he was meeting left with the larger part of his takings for the night, she stepped out of the darkness, revealing herself and walking slowly towards him. She saw him tense with worry at the sight of her, wondering how much she'd seen.

"Hi there." She drawled, her southern accent thick and sweet. "Are you looking for a little company?" His shoulders relaxed visibly as she smiled widely, only her human teeth showing.

"Maybe…." He answered, smiling back, his guard dropping completely at the sight of what he thought was a harmless, attractive hooker.

"I could help you out with that." He was right in front of her now and without warning she moved behind him at her heightened speed, placing a hand over his mouth to muffle his screams of surprised fright, and pulling him down so that his neck was bared.

In seconds her fangs were in him, drinking from the artery in his neck which pulsed abnormally hard with his fear. When she felt the flow of his life slow she pulled away reluctantly. She knew no one would truly miss this one if she were to drain him, but she also knew_ he_ was nearby and he would not let her. Holding the Human tightly by the throat, nearly cutting off his air supply, she stared deep into his eyes and took his mind effortlessly.

"I was never here. You dropped off your payment and simply went home to sleep off your hard night." Releasing him, careful to make sure she hadn't left marks on his skin, she watched him stumble off in a daze.

He'd hardly been gone a moment when another figure emerged from the darkened corner of the alley, tall and imposing, beautiful and fierce. She smiled as he came to her.

"How did I do?" She asked, batting her eyes and giving him a toothy smile. Her fangs, she knew, were something of an obsession for him.

"You were perfect Lover." He purred as his arms wound their way around her waist and he pulled her into a frenzied kiss, licking the excess blood from her sharp teeth.

Hunting, they'd found, seemed to be one of her Vampiric gifts. She instantly excelled at scenting and tracking, at staying hidden and undetected by her prey, and at glamouring them to forget it all afterwards. He'd told her that it might have been because of her Fairy heritage. The Fae, he'd assured her, were a fierce race, unparalleled at both cunning and cruelty.

She had no reason to dispute his claim. In fact she felt comforted there might be a reason why the bloodlust she felt showed so little sign of simmering down, even now: six months after her turning, when her other instinctual urges were finally showing signs of becoming controllable.

"Come, Pam is waiting for us at Fangtasia." He said, his mouth reluctantly leaving hers, as his arms tightened around her and he shot them into the sky.

She'd flown with him many times, but she never tired of the raw feeling of the wind in her face and hair, or the power of defying the gravity which held others to the ground. She hoped this gift might still be somewhere in her future too, though she knew that her Maker possessing flight only gave her a slightly better chance of inheriting it. Certainly it hadn't helped Pam to acquire it.

"What are you thinking so hard about dear one?" Eric asked, his hand running soothingly up and down her back, trying to keep their lust at bay until they were in a better place to deal with it.

Sookie had hunted and fed and now that her hunger for blood had been satisfied her body would be yearning to sate its other most primal need. He had watched the whole thing with great pleasure. However, twenty feet above the city, was not the place to gratify either of their desires. Luckily, her words suggested she agreed.

"I was just wondering, what Pam's gift is." She had wanted to ask her sibling a million times but thought better of it. Pam could be quite scary when she was annoyed. Satisfying this curiosity now seemed a good way to distract herself from the feelings Eric's body pressed so close to hers incited.

Eric laughed at her answer. Poor Pam, he knew it rankled his eldest child that her gift was not apparent, well not apparent until it was much too late for the wonderer to do anything about it.

"Ah, Pam's gift is an excellent one, just as yours is. You haven't yet had the chance to see it in action yet, but Pam's gift is her strength and her speed. She is far stronger and faster than others her age and, thanks to my excellent tutelage, she is able to outclass and overpower Vampires nearly twice as old as her. She is a sight to see in battle." He answered, pride in his voice.

Sookie too, though not gifted with increased strength, was becoming quite a formidable warrior. The gifts that allowed her to excel at the hunt transferred quite easily into battle. She had chosen to learn to fight with knives, blades small enough to be easily concealed on her person, but sharp enough, under her skillful hands, to be frighteningly deadly. Her skill, coupled with her cunning and creativity, made for an opponent who quite easily found ways to dart in close to a person, with even a longer blade, and cut them away with violent efficiency.

"What are _you_ thinking about so intensely?" She asked, repeating his question from earlier with a lustful twinkle in her eye as he set them down behind the club.

"I'm thinking of your last training session." He answered, his voice darkening with yet more lust as they made their way to his office.

In the months since her turning he had been channeling her more violent desires into training and hunting and it had helped her to cope and control herself to some degree. He still felt how much she longed to kill each time she drank from her prey or trained with him, but there had been no more incidents like Merlotte's death.

They were still suffering the fallout from her disobedience though. Despite the fact that they'd been able to circumvent investigation by the Human authorities, the good relations he worked hard to foster with the Were packs and Shifters in his area had abruptly turned sour when he hadn't bothered to deny the rumors of his guilt. And Compton, fearing he might be next on the list for his own involvement, had defected like the coward he was. He'd run straight to Victor and sworn his fealty directly to him, taking his database and any insights and information he had gathered over the years to Eric's most immediate enemy.

It had turned out to be every bit the cluster fuck he'd imagined it would be when he landed on the grass by the highway and saw what she'd done, but between the two of them at least, they seemed to have come to a point where they could both be content. She was able to vent enough of her savagery to keep from killing and he was able to indulge her darker needs to some degree without fear of what might happen if she ever remembered.

As he sat behind his desk, he tried to stifle the sigh the thought caused. It seemed apparent now that whatever had brought about her memory loss would not correct itself. In the last six months they had covertly consulted with her Fairy cousin, but he had been unable to offer any insight. Though she was certainly not the first part Fae to ever have been turned, it was a rare occurrence. Still the few others that existed hadn't suffered the same circumstances so it was probably not related to her heritage.

They had also consulted with Dr. Ludwig, calling her in under the pretense of fixing a damaged Human. The healer, in her usual brisk way, had informed Eric she could shed no light on the problem. She was a doctor, she could only treat physical ailments and as a Vampire Sookie suffered no such problems. The good doctor had offered to make inquiries but Eric had been forced to refuse her offer, both because it might alert the wrong people to Sookie's condition, and also because she herself had been so adamantly opposed to it.

In the months that had passed, Sookie had become openly hostile to any attempt to recover her lost memories. She felt no particular desire to be returned to her former self. She was happy as she was and hated any indication he was not. It caused more than one heated argument between them, and he knew she had yet to fully forgive him for it.

Their last fight had finally made him understand he would have to leave the woman he loved behind. She was gone. He could either try to find happiness with the Vampire who had taken her place, or he could keep forcing the issue and drive his child's affections further from him. He was her Maker, he_ could_ have forced her, but even if she did not remember his promise to her, he did. He had sworn, that night in her living room, he would never use his power as her Maker to force her to his will. It was his duty to keep his promise no matter how much he wished differently.

Looking at her now, as she closed his office door behind her and began to stalk her way over to him, he knew letting it go had been the right decision. She was not the same Sookie, it was true, but she was a magnificent creature: beautiful, fierce, passionate, intensely driven, a Vampire through and through and she was his. No matter what happened he would not have it any other way.

He had felt her affection for him growing with each passing night and despite their unhappy moments, she was coming to care for him again. It was not as it had been, it couldn't be, those emotions had been the emotions of a Human, but it was strong and deep and only for him.

She was just about to straddle his lap, intent on relieving the lust that had been building between them all night, as she hunted and he watched, when the door swung open, hitting the wall behind it hard. Pam sauntered in, a scowl on her face and a cream colored envelope clutched in her crimson painted fingers. Sighing audibly, Sookie moved from her position, almost in his lap, to lean against the wall.

"I'm sensing annoyance." Eric arched his eyebrow, hoping to inject some levity into the moment, if only to keep from breaking something in his frustration.

"You'll be feeling some first hand in a moment." Pam snipped back, thrusting the envelope under his nose.

Taking the expensive paper from her, he opened it, pulling out the card inside. He had only to glance at it before he hissed, the annoyance Pam had promised welling up almost instantaneously.

"Fucking Victor." He growled, throwing the thing on his desk and getting up to begin pacing the room in anger.

"What's going on?" Sookie asked, annoyed now too since she was the only one in the dark about what was going on.

"Victor is opening a Vampire bar here in Area Five. He's just invited us to the grand opening party…on Halloween night." Pam informed, crossing arms under her chest as her fangs snicked out. "He knows Fangtasia's Halloween party is the event of the season each year."

"He's doing it to bait me." Eric interjected, not bothering to stop his pacing as he did.

"He's doing a good job of it." Pam replied dryly. "Frankly I liked it better when he was only trying to kill us. We've already set everything up. We can't back out of our contracts for the party this late and we can't have it now either." Pam was right on both counts. They were obligated to appear at the party of Louisiana's Lieutenant if he wished it so.

Sookie knew enough to understand it wasn't the money that was angering either of them. Victor was Lieutenant of the state yes, but his principle duty was as Sheriff of Area One. His setting up shop in Eric's territory was a direct challenge to her bonded's rule in this part of the state, and it made her blood boil with anger. Even if she hadn't known from Pam and Eric all that Victor had done in his attempts to get Eric out of the way, her single encounter with him would have been enough to let her know that he was a self-aggrandizing bully, unworthy of the fealty her bonded gave him. Before any of them could say anything more though, one of the waitresses appeared in the doorway, looking nervous.

"Mistress Pam, there's a woman here to see you." She said nervously, her head bowed meekly.

Pam turned ready to berate the barmaid for her intrusion, but from behind her the 'visitor' made herself known. The angry sneer Pam had been giving dropped and a startling look of affection took its place.

"Miriam?" Pam said, the question evident in her voice.

Sookie was astonished by the change in her sister's demeanor. In the months she'd known Pam the other Vampire had never looked at any Human that way. But then she'd suspected for a while now this girl had somehow gone from being simply a pleasant food source to something more, though Pam would never admit such a thing out loud.

"I'm sorry Pam. I didn't mean to disturb you but…." The girl, Miriam, trailed off there, her voice breaking on a sob as she buried her face in her slender, trembling hands.

The waitress took the opportunity to flee back to the bar as Pam gave one quick look to Eric, who nodded his head just slightly. Using her heightened speed Pam moved swiftly to the girl, putting her arm around her in a gesture of comfort and shepherding her away, probably to her own office.

"What will you do about Victor?" Sookie asked when they were alone again.

Eric sat behind his desk once more, raking one hand through his hair even as he sent most of the papers on his desk flying to floor with the other, still annoyed and angry.

"What is there to do? We cannot refuse his invitation." It seemed that, unable to destabilize Eric by hurting those close to him, Victor had descended to attempts to hurt his bottom line instead.

Another Vampire bar in this area would be stiff competition, since Northern Louisiana might be vast in terms of land but not population. Opening the bar on Halloween and forcing Fangtasia to close for the night would certainly start him out with the upper hand as well.

Growling audibly Eric knew he had no choice but to concede this particular skirmish to Victor. They would go to his party and do their duty, but every threat, every slight Victor committed only brought him one step closer to his final death. Eric didn't know how or when, but he knew Victor would die by his hand.

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

Eric spent the rest of his night cancelling the arrangements they'd made for the now defunct Halloween party and tallying up how much money they'd lost in security deposits on catering, specialty bloods and bands. All in all it had been an infuriating night even if there hadn't been anymore outright drama.

He and Sookie were just pulling up in front of the house when he spied Pam leaning up against her car in his driveway. He hadn't seen her since she'd left his office with the little Human earlier in the night, but as he looked at her now, in the glow from his headlights, the tracks of blood running down her cheeks were apparent.

He felt Sookie take his hand and heard her gasp of shock. Bringing the car to a stop next to Pam's, he leaned over and kissed her on the forehead.

"Give us a few minutes." He said softly.

He knew Sookie wanted to stay and find out what was wrong. She was worried seeing Pam so… broken looking and not knowing the cause. But she also knew it was Eric, Pam must have come to see and so, getting out of the car, she went into the house with only a quick backward glance. When he and Pam were alone he stepped out of the Corvette and came to stand in front of her.

Pam's emotions were rarely ever overwhelming anymore. She had, in the centuries since her making, always been cooler and more controlled than any other Vampire he knew. But when she felt, though it was not often, she felt with a depth that he'd rarely seen equaled. Till now her fierce devotion had always been reserved for himself and more lately for Sookie. He knew the pain he felt coming from her now though had nothing to do with either him or her sister.

They simply stared at each other for a long moment, he not knowing what to say and Pam seemingly unable to speak, before she launched herself into his arms. Shock was his first reaction as he felt Pam collapse into him. He couldn't remember the last time she'd touched him like this, it had surely been decades, perhaps even centuries.

It wouldn't matter if they lived for millennia though, he would never become accustomed to or apathetic about his child's anguish. Wanting to find some way to help her, Eric wrapped his arms around her, holding her tight with one arm and petting her long, pale blond hair with the other.

"What's wrong dearest?" He asked softly, soothingly into the top of her head. He heard Pam make a hiccupping little laugh at the term of endearment, before she gave herself over to another body racking sob, her arms tightening around him.

"It's Miriam," she began.

"Your little Human?" He asked. Pam nodded in answer.

"She…she's dying. Cancer." It was all Pam could get out.

"I'm sorry," He answered her, the words sounding strange in his mouth. "You know they're not very sturdy, dearest. They die of the smallest things all the time." It was true of course, but he regretted saying it when she began to sob all the harder.

"I know. I know." Pam's voice was small, almost like a little girl's.

"But you don't want this one to die. She…means something to you, something more?" He didn't need her to answer really.

He could feel how her emotions spiked when he spoke of Miriam dying. It was like the thought of the girl's death was an actual physical pain to his child, resting right over her normally still chest. It was a feeling he was only to familiar with and, without consciously choosing to, he found himself looking at the house and thinking of the woman who waited for him within.

"Is this love Eric? Is_ this_ what it feels like?" She asked him pulling away, her face betraying her pain, puzzlement and anger all at once.

"Yes." He answered simply, wishing he could take her hurt away and knowing it was impossible all at the same time.

"It sucks!" She snapped, turning away from him suddenly angry, as though she'd just realized she'd been crying like a hysterical Human in his arms. Pam hated being weak, even in front of him. It was just more proof that what she felt for the girl was exceptional.

"That's mostly been my experience as well." He found himself telling her. He'd never admitted that to anyone, not even to himself, but he'd never lied to her in their many years together and he wouldn't start now. "What will you do?" He asked her after a moment in which he tamped down on his own feelings of hurt and grief.

"If you are in agreement I will bond with her. Surely my blood is strong enough to cure her." He felt his eyebrow rise at her statement. He remembered with crystal clarity how incredulous Pam had been when he'd come back to their hotel room in Rhodes after bonding with Sookie and she'd liked Sookie, even then.

"If that is what you desire, you know you do not need my permission for it." He told her, even as he felt his eyebrow climb up to his hairline.

"I know I don't, but I want it just the same. You have your hands full with Sookie, if I bond with Miriam…" Pam trailed off, but Eric didn't really need her to finish that statement either. His bonding to Sookie had been unconventional to say the least, but normal bonded pairs were very attached to each other, especially in the beginning. It was a connection second only to that of a Maker and their child.

"I will be fine." He said, his voice steady and firm. It would have convinced another, but not Pam.

"I had thought things were getting better between you." She said, pulling herself away from her own sorrow for a moment, almost happy to have another's to concentrate on.

"She hasn't tried to kill anyone lately." He snorted in reply. Pam's only response was a raised eyebrow of her own. Eric could only sigh, it was becoming almost habitual for him at this point. "She hates me for curbing her darker instincts, but can't escape her attachment to me. She feels something close to love for me sometimes and at others she despises me outright, believing _my_ love is only for the person she used to be and not the person she is now."

"And do you love her…this her?" Eric looked at Pam with utter disbelief painting his face. "Then why not take her away from here, Eric? You've never cared for power and with Victor breathing down your neck Louisiana has ceased to be the sleepy backwater you came to, searching for peace and quiet. Why not resign and take Sookie somewhere where she can indulge some of her less…mainstream desires?"

This time it was Eric who turned away in anger.

"Do you believe I haven't thought of that already?" He asked, his voice rising incrementally. "Do you think for a single second I would not love to take her away from here? Do you not imagine I would not love to indulge her, to truly hunt with her, to drain them with her, to take her in the blood of our prey?"

Visions filled his head at his words, visions of he and Sookie, running through the woods in the tattered remains of what had once been fine clothes, hunting for their blood, reveling in the fear of the helpless Humans they had chosen. He would take her to the woods of his homeland, rest with her in the caves that dotted the snow covered mountains, warm themselves in the springs which bubbled up from the earth, make love on the soft moss covered floor of the vast forests in the endless night of the northern winter, and kill.

They would kill without fear of punishment or reprisal, kill without worry for the consequences, the political fallout, the human backlash. They would be free to live as true Vampires, as he knew she yearned too. The images excited him more than he dared to admit and he could feel himself hardening, his need for her rising as inevitably as the tide, before it died suddenly in the face of reality.

"Then why not do it?" Pam prodded, feeling his sudden deflation. He turned on her then his fangs dropping in a sudden swell anger and frustration at the hopelessness of the situation.

"Because she will NEVER forgive me if she remembers!" He spat, his eyes blazing. "Do you not understand Pam? If I deny her as I have she will grow to resent me, more than she already does, to the point she will no longer be able to stand being with me. She will blame me for stifling her, for curbing her bloodlust and she will leave me! If I give into her, let her have her wish, slaughter the innocent, bathe in their blood, she will love me now but should she ever remember she will be revolted by what she has done, by what I LET her do, and she will turn away from me forever!

It doesn't matter what I do!" He felt himself falling to his knees without even realizing they'd betrayed him. "No matter what I am bound to lose her. And I do love her, Pam. I love her more than I have ever loved anything! I loved her when she was an obstinate, willful, beautiful Human full of love and light and humanity and I love her now, a ruthless and murderous Vampire, filled with her barely suppressed darkness. It is my curse to love to her no matter what form she takes for as long as I live." The last came out as a whisper, his anger having burned itself out with the admittance of the realizations that had been tormenting him for months.

He flinched, slightly startled, when he felt Pam's arms come around him again, as she knelt on the hard cement of the driveway beside him. They held each other in silence for a long while this time, both of them unbelieving of how such a Human emotion could have brought them so low.

"So what do we do?" Pam asked finally. She was slightly shocked when she heard Eric begin to laugh softly beside her. Though she supposed it was a moment where you either laughed at the irony and rose above it or gave in to the pain and allowed it to sweep you away.

"We are immortal Pam, we keep moving." Something so simple to say and yet, sometimes, so hard to do, she thought.

"The sun is coming up," was her only reply.

"Rest here today?" It was a question though neither of them truly believed she would answer anything but yes.

"Let's go find Sookie, she's worried enough_ I_ can feel her." Eric nodded, picking himself up and offering his hand to Pam, grateful for the first time in many years for the oblivion of death, even if it would only last a few hours.


	12. Chapter 12

_**A/N:**__ I just want to thank everyone who's been reviewing this story. I feel like y'all are my touchstone and I can't thank you enough for it._

_Some reviewers have asked, and I thought it might be a general question, if Sookie will ever get her memories back. I don't think I'm spoiling anything by saying, the answer is yes. 'Real Sookie' will be back well before the end of the story. She and Eric will be fighting to make everything I muck up for them right again! Promise! _

_Thanks again to everyone who's kept with this story! And of course a HUGE thank you to my beta __**Northman Maille**__: for putting up with me and making this story as good as it could ever be!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing… _

_._~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

Victor's club was on the other side of Shreveport from Fangtasia, in a section of the city close to the river. It was clear the building he'd converted had previously been a factory and the industrial feel of the place gave it a 'Matrix-y' vibe that Eric found clichéd, conceited and banal, and therefore perfectly Victor.

"Congratulations Eric, it appears you're now the owner of Shreveport's classiest Vampire bar." Pam snarked with distaste as she leaned over his lap looking out the limo's window at the façade of the club, ever careful not to wrinkle the black dress that was the centerpiece of her "Holly Golightly" costume.

If it had been a less stressful occasion Eric might have laughed at Pam's reaction. He remembered quite clearly the night she'd arrived from Minnesota and seen the nearly completed Fangtasia.

If Pam had loved him even a tiny bit less, she would have washed her hands of him and the whole thing right then and there: it was so beneath her. As it was she hadn't been able to find a single good thing to say about the place that night, a fact which hadn't changed in the intervening years.

It hadn't mattered how many times he'd explained to her they needed to sell the stereotype, not the reality, in order to make the bar profitable. It _still_ hadn't mattered even when Eric's instincts had proved right and Fangtasia became a runaway success. In Pam's eyes it would always be a dive.

Only now they'd been out-dived.

"Hmmm, we're going to lose business." Was his only reply as their driver pulled up at the club entrance.

Before one of Victor's bouncers, a hulking looking, black Vampire dressed in head to toe studded leather, opened the limo door for them, Eric gave one last loaded look to each of the Vampires in the car. His meaning plain: all joking and easiness stopped now. From this moment on they had one job and one job only: live through the night.

Victor had tried to kill them all before and a party was always the perfect disguise for a massacre. The other Sheriffs and their entourages were transplants from Nevada and loyal to Madden, which meant they would be utterly alone once they walked inside. Five of them against a potentially innumerable amount of enemies. They were to keep their eyes and ears open at all times, and hope Victor intended to do nothing more sinister tonight than gloat over having out-clichéd his rival.

The inside of the club was only slightly better than the outside, the dance floor being the centerpiece of the first floor, taking up almost the entirety of it, below a high ceiling and ringed by three more steel supported levels all overlooking it. It struck each of the Vampires almost simultaneously: it could be a dance floor or just as easily a coliseum-esque fighting ring, the action below clearly visible from the safety of the higher levels.

The realization made both Maxwell Lee, whose fighting weapon of choice (a rather intimidatingly large crossbow) was concealed under the leather coat of his 'Morpheus' costume and Thalia, whose short sword was easily hidden under the voluminous, bright turquoise linen of her Cleopatra costume, shift slightly, repositioning their secreted weapons for the quickest retrieval.

However for the moment they could all satisfy themselves that the only thing happening on the dance floor/fighting ring was a good deal of gyrating by both Humans and Vampires, as they moved to the heavy techno beat that caused the entire club to seem to vibrate… almost like it had its own heartbeat.

Eric, Sookie, Pam, Thalia and Maxwell Lee all followed Victor's bouncer up the seemingly endless succession of metal staircases to the final level of the club, where they waited for yet another burly bouncer to admit them. The fourth floor seemed designated as the VIP section tonight, and Victor was using it for the express purpose of holding court.

Once they were admitted they found Victor lounging on a vulgar looking red, plush sofa trimmed in gold accents, several human females reclining beside and on top of him and Bill Compton standing at attention behind him. Eric, Sookie and Pam shared a moment of derisive amusement as they stared at the two Vampires.

Bill had no doubt recycled something long unused from his closet as he stood behind Victor in a thirties style zoot suit, with matching Fedora and, to Eric's eternal amusement, an unlit cigar hanging from his mouth. Compton, ever the pussy, was probably far to weak stomached to be able to handle the taste of the thing when lit

Victor's costume? There were simply no words for the Lieutenant's gall. He sat on his tacky couch in his tacky club, dressed as the most feared, respected and audacious Vampire ever to exist: Count Dracula. As though he were somehow heir to or the embodiment of the things Dracula represented to Vampires everywhere.

"Ah Eric, you've arrived." Victor said, looking up from the neck of one of the fangbangers lounging in his lap, as though he hadn't known the five Vampires were standing in the room until just then.

Eric inclined his head slightly and the others followed suit, careful to bow more deeply to Louisiana's Lieutenant. It wasn't lost on Eric, as his eyes took in the entirety of the room once more, that Bill's gaze hadn't left Sookie since the door opened. Taking her hand now as they moved to the opposite couch, where Victor indicated they should sit, he knew that she was a vision. He'd sensed many males, Human and Vampire, looking at her, lusting after her in her short, Grecian style dress and gladiator sandals, admiring the touches to her costume that only added to her wild beauty, including the large bow she held in her hand and the quiver of arrows at her back. She was Diana, the Greek goddess of the hunt, tonight and every bit as ferally alluring as he knew her to truly be.

Still, the way Compton stared at her as though she were the only thing in the room set him on edge. It wasn't his normal look of longing and sorrow expressed through rounded, anguished eyes. Instead, it was a look of …anticipation.

"So what do you think of my club?" Victor asked with his usual false affability once Eric and Sookie had settled into their seats and Pam, Thalia and Maxwell had taken up positions behind them.

"You've outdone yourself." Eric commented dryly, his statement being nothing but the truth. Victor _had_ taken bad taste to an entirely new level. The only thing that could have better completed the Goth/Underworld theme Victor had gone for was if Marilyn Manson himself took the stage at Midnight.

"I'm so glad you approve. I hope I won't be encroaching too heavily on your clientele, but you know what the Humans say about healthy competition." Victor chuckled once again, until the sound of Bill clearing his throat was heard.

"I believe you have matters to discuss with Sheriff Northman in private and you will have other guests arriving soon." Bill intoned obsequiously. It was unclear what role he was playing in Victor's hierarchy, but whatever it was he was obviously enjoying being in the know, especially when Eric was not.

"Thank you Bill, you're always so helpful. Why don't you escort my lovely companions down to the floor for me. I'm sure they'd like a chance to mingle." Reluctantly the woman began to get up and Victor looked at Eric, one brow raised. "In private, Eric." Victor repeated, his affability falling away.

Without turning his head or changing his expression , Eric raised his hand and made a small gesture with his fingers towards the door. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Pam staring back at him as she and Sookie walked together out the door followed by Maxwell Lee and Thalia. Both Pam and Sookie were worried, but they'd known coming in here tonight that some kind of trouble was to be expected.

Sending them both reassurance, he focused himself entirely on Victor and attempted to prepare for what might be coming.

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

Once the door to Victor's private area was closed behind them Pam took Sookie's hand and pulled her close.

"As Eric's second it's expected I will remain here and wait for him. Stick close to Thalia and Maxwell Lee. We'll find you as soon as Eric is dismissed. Be careful. Stay alert and _don't_ lose your temper or your control. Victor will take any excuse he can get to harm Eric." Pam's words were whispered so low no one but Sookie would be able to hear them and, as her sister pulled away slightly, she could see the determination in Sookie's eyes.

"I understand, Pam." She said, squeezing Pam's hand as both promise and reassurance.

As Sookie walked behind her two bodyguards she took in the club again exactly as Eric had taught her. The exits were all guarded by Victor's people, ostensibly to make sure that no one crashed the party. The dance floor was awash with both Humans and Vampires, dancing and touching, some of the Vampires feeding right out in the open since this was a private event.

As the alcohol continued to flow freely the night would, no doubt, quickly devolve into an all-out orgy. And from their places overlooking the dance floor on the higher levels, Sookie could already see people losing their clothes.

As they made their way through the throng of bodies on the dance floor to the far corner of the room, Maxwell and Thalia intent on getting them to a place where they couldn't be snuck up on and would have a good vantage point, a man caught Sookie's attention.

He was Human, shorter than Eric but a good height for a breather. He wore only a pair of black pleather pants and motorcycle boots and his chest was nicely muscled and hairless. Around his face fell soft looking, black hair and finishing his good looks were a pair of wide green eyes, which seemed to burn just a little brighter as they fell on her, his interest plain.

He was attractive, but Sookie paid him no more attention than it took to look him up and down once. She had no interest in Humans besides nourishment and even if they hadn't all fed heartily before arriving, suspicious of what might be 'in' the Humans Victor would offer them, she wouldn't have chosen someone like him.

She enjoyed hunting men, it was true, because they were always _so_ confident they were above any kind of physical danger. But for a simple feeding she always preferred females, especially knowing the effect the sight had on her husband.

She could not have been glancing at him for more than a moment as she made her way behind Thalia and Maxwell, but it was a moment too much. As she turned her attention back where it belonged she realized there were now several bodies between her and her guards. Thalia and Maxwell kept walking, so intent on what was happening around them they hadn't realized she'd fallen behind.

Just as she was about to part the people in front of her a hand, cold and gray, clasped hers, pulling her through the crowd in the opposite direction. She was set to wrench it back and call for Thalia when she looked up and saw its owner: Bill.

"Don't!" He said authoritatively. "Any of the Vampires here will obey my orders and I have no problem ordering them to harm your friends. Don't cause a scene needlessly. I only want to talk." The last was said more quietly but still with an edge to it.

Sookie wasn't sure which emotion she felt more predominantly: disgust at the way he looked at her or bloodlust. She hadn't forgotten his part in bringing Victor to Fangtasia and was very much looking forward to the day when she would be able to pay him back for it.

As they moved to wherever he was leading she wondered endlessly how her other self could have become romantically entangled with him, especially after meeting Eric. He was inferior to her Viking in every way, on top of being a coward and a turncoat. It was one of the reasons she felt certain she didn't want to know that other part of herself, clearly she'd been a fool. She didn't want a fool's thoughts and feelings polluting her body.

By this time Thalia and Maxwell had noticed her absence and begun to retrace their steps. Thalia was halfway back across the floor when Sookie caught her eyes and made a signal for her to wait where she was. Thalia nodded, understanding she should not interfere just yet, but paced Sookie and Bill nonetheless, ready should the need arise.

By then Bill had pulled them into a small alcove in the corner of the dance floor. It would probably normally have housed a private table or two but tonight it was bare. A curtain half hid them from the crowd, but Sookie made sure to position herself so she was as visible as possible, knowing Thalia was close by.

"What do you want?" She asked indignantly trying to wrench her hand away as she'd been wanting to, upset that she couldn't. Bill might be a miserable excuse for a Vampire, as Pam had often said, but he was still older than her and therefore physically stronger.

"Victor will not tolerate Eric for much longer." He whispered urgently to her. "I don't wish to see you brought low because of your loyalty to him. He might be your Maker but that doesn't mean you have to remain with him. Help us and I'll make sure that Victor spares you. I…I could take care of you." Bill said it all in a cool voice, calm and seemingly detached, but she could see the want burning in his eyes and feel how his hand tightened around her wrist. It was as though he thought he had the power to simply decide never to let her go.

It was nauseating and slightly unnerving but Sookie found she wasn't frightened. In fact the prospect of having a legitimate reason to fight Bill (his hands on her alone would do) was actually exhilarating. No her only fear in all this was for Eric.

Bill could be telling her the truth. He could be trying to help her, but why? He'd turn tail and run when he believed Eric killed Merlotte, terrified he might be next. Why betray the upper hand to her like this, taking the risk she'd refuse him and go running with the information back to her Maker? Surely he must have realized that, even if she weren't married and bonded to Eric, their single tie as Maker and child would outweigh any concern for her own wellbeing.

Was he that dense? Or had he never cared for his Maker as she did for hers? Or was he hoping, young as she was, she would be overwhelmed by fear at his confession and betray information to him in her panic? He didn't know, despite her slip up so many months ago, that she'd lost her memories. Was he hoping their prior connection would somehow endear her to him for trying to save her?

She didn't imagine she could have been so completely different a person that her old self would have betrayed Eric, any more than she would now. Or could it be he simply didn't know her as well as he thought he did? Eric said she and Bill had been a couple for less than a year.

"No." was her only reply, knowing in a situation like this it was better to say as little as possible.

There was a brief flash of anger behind Bill's cool eyes before his face softened into an expression of patient affection. Sookie shivered as his other hand rose up to softly caress her face.

"I know things have changed Sookie. I know you may never be able to forgive me for the things that happened to end our relationship, but I still love you and I've always tried my best to protect you. Remember it was me, not Eric, who came for you the night the Fairies captured you. It was me, not Eric, who vowed to die for you the night of Nevada's take over.

I know you feel as though you're closer to him now than you've ever been before, but how long do you think that will last? Eric is a thousand years old and if he survives this, he could live another thousand years. Do you really think you'll be with him in another millennium? You and I both know he isn't the type. Why sacrifice your young life for a man who will grow tired of you and cast you aside sooner rather than later?" This time she succeeded in taking her wrist back from his grasp, whether because he had let her or because the force of her anger had startled him, she couldn't tell.

"Do not presume to think there is anything _you_ can tell _me_ about _my_ Maker, my bonded and my husband." She snarled, preparing to walk off before she did lose her control and broke her promise to Pam. Compton would die by her hand, she'd sworn that to herself on the night he'd brought Victor to Fangtasia, but now wasn't the time or the place.

"Do you think Pam ever suspected she'd be in the position she is now?" His voice wrapped around her like cold silk caressing her skin. "Do you think when he turned her, bedded her, took her innocence, she ever thought she'd be watching him move on to someone else? And now look at her pathetically hanging by his side, watching from the wings while he makes you all the same promises. You'll be in her position one day Sookie, mark my words."

Sookie couldn't help it when she turned back to him with a wide, disbelieving stare, her anger momentarily forgotten. When Bill saw the hurt surprise his words had caused he smiled a smile that couldn't decide if it was concerned or triumphant.

"I was sure Pam had told you all about her and Eric before…almost positive really. How can it be you don't remember?" Sookie felt a slight moment of panic at that but kept her face carefully neutral.

"You're mistaken, as always Bill. I'm not shocked by your words, I'm shocked by your audacity." She tried to make her voice come out disdainful but had no idea if she'd succeeded.

"You're lying. You forget Sookie, it might have been a long time ago, but I've had a great deal of your blood. When you're this close to me I can still feel you. Or have you somehow forgotten that as well?" He was getting too close to the truth and suddenly she understood.

Her slip up in front of him before, Victor separating Eric and Pam from her, he wasn't trying to warn her of an imminent attack by his new Master or to save her from it. He was hoping to make her scared or angry enough to say something foolish again. He suspected. He might not know for certain, but he suspected what was wrong with her.

"I haven't forgotten." She lied, now desperate to get away as she feared he could feel her attempted deception. "But I wish I could. I wish I could forget everything about you. You might be right about Eric, only time will tell, but I'd rather be tossed away by Eric any night than taken in by you."

With those words she turned and left him without a backwards glance, rushing to Thalia's side.

"Are you well?" Thalia asked, concern swimming across her features for only a second.

"Yes." Sookie nodded letting the other Vampire lead her back to the corner where Maxwell waited.

They waited there without further incident for another half hour, while Sookie watched the figures writhe on the dance floor and her mind wandered. She knew Compton had only meant to goad her with his warnings and accusations against Eric, but she couldn't put them out of her mind. Neither Eric nor Pam had ever told her anything about Pam's making or the fact that they'd been lovers. Was it true? If it was what did it mean?

Pam had seemed content with her place as Eric's elder child and second, but what if she wasn't? She'd never seen Pam with a man before. Was that because she genuinely preferred women or because no other man would ever live up to Eric in her estimation? Was she in love with him? Had he been in love with her? Had he tossed Pam aside? Would he do the same to her?

There was always an undercurrent between she and Eric. She wanted things he would not allow her, but she'd never doubted his love before, she felt it each and every night. And yet, an insidious voice inside her whispered, wasn't his love really for the person she'd been? Didn't she struggle each and every night not to give her heart to him completely because she knew his love was truly for her other self?

She withheld herself from him because he wanted her to be something she wasn't. Eric withheld himself from her because she desired to be a true Vampire, as she saw it, and he didn't want that. Even if what Bill had told her about Eric and Pam were a complete lie, how long would it be before Eric threw up his hands and decided to be done with her? She wasn't what he wanted. She wasn't the person he'd expected to spend eternity with. How long would it be before he pushed her aside and she was forced to watch him fall in love with someone else, turn her, promise her an eternity of happily ever afters?

The thought caused her an almost physical pain. The idea of her bonded with another was like a knife in her gut, but instead of giving into her sorrow she found herself becoming angrier and angrier. She was someone worth loving, someone worth keeping. She was, as he always told her, a magnificent Vampire. If it wasn't good enough for him then she would find someone it would be good enough for!

Out of the corner of her eye she saw the man from before, the tall brunette with the strangely compelling green eyes. He was still staring at her from his place on the dance floor, his eyes bright with invitation.

Pushing past Thalia and Maxwell Lee, heedless of their hissed calls of her name she made her way onto the dance floor and to the bare chested Human. He'd been dancing with another Human female, but as Sookie approached him he left his partner standing alone on the floor and began to walk to her too, an almost awed smile on his face.

"You noticed me." He said breathlessly as they met in the middle of the crowd.

Sookie's only response was to pull him closer by his belt loops, grinding her body against his. The Human didn't need to be encouraged twice and wrapped his arms around her, his hands running up and down the cool, bare skin of her back as they began to dance.

"Now I've noticed you, what do you want from me?" She asked in her most seductive tone.

"I want you to bite me." Was his forward reply, pressing himself impossibly closer to her, his eyes hungry and earnest all at the same time.

Sookie nodded her head, hooking her finger into his belt loop again and leading him off to the same corner Bill had taken her to less than hour before. Pulling the curtain almost all the way closed this time she beckoned the man to her again.

"What's your name?" He asked her, astonished as he held her close once more.

"What's yours?" she countered instead of answering, not really caring.

"Christopher." He replied just before his breath hitched from the feeling of her fangs grazing against his throat.

His hands slid from her back to cup the globes of her bottom as she pierced his skin. As she began to feed from him, he moaned in ecstasy and ground his body against hers, his erection obvious as it rubbed into her stomach. His blood was young, healthy and surprisingly absent of substances or alcohol and she felt her lust begin pulse, the need for sex becoming increasingly more necessary as the need for blood diminished.

She ground her body against his in return as her fangs retracted and she began to seal his wound with her saliva, but when one of his warm hands strayed from her bottom and began to rub against her sex something in her recoiled violently. Instead of feeling more aroused, she felt…repulsed, almost nauseous. Pushing him away suddenly she shivered as though she were actually cold. What she was though, was shattered.

He was handsome, he tasted wonderful, he wanted her and looked at her as though she really were the predatory goddess her costume suggested. She could have him, have anything she wanted from him, but in the end he was just…wrong. His hair was short and dark when it should have been a fall of silken wheat. His eyes were heated emeralds when they should have been iced over sapphires. His body was warm instead of cold, the muscles beneath his skin giving with ease when they should have been hard, unyielding planes of steel. He was merely a Human when what she wanted was Eric… only Eric.

It was then that she knew, it was then that she realized, she hadn't truly been able to hold any piece of herself from him as she'd thought. She hadn't been able to hide her heart away. She loved Eric. She was his whether it was truly her he wanted or not.

"What…what's wrong?" Her meal asked shakily as he stood back up from where she'd thrown him into the wall in her haste to have his hands off her.

"Leave." She ordered coldly. "Get away from me." The last was said in a menacing hiss which made the Human's heart pound with terror and perfumed the small space with the scent of his fear. Clumsily, hurried to be away from her, stumbling over his own feet to reach the safety of the crowd that lay beyond the curtain.

She paid him no more attention than a Human would a fly until she heard the curtain being pulled back and the man gasping once more with terror. Looking up to see what had startled him, she realized the imposing figure of her bonded was completely blocking the Human's only means of exit, his strong body backlit by the strobing lights of the club.

Eric looked down at the man with an expression that had no doubt been the last thing many an unlucky mortal had seen, before snarling at him to be gone. The man, Christopher, pushed past the terrifying Viking with all the courage he possessed and ran, probably out of the club altogether.

When the Human was gone Eric walked completely into the small alcove and let the curtain drop behind him. Sookie could see his face clearly with her heightened sight, even in the dimly lit space, and for the very first time she was frightened of him.

"There was no need to stop on my account." He said, his voice soft and chilling devoid of emotion.

"Eric I…" He grabbed her arm forcefully, not enough to hurt, but enough that, coupled with his terrifying eyes, her fear ratcheted up another notch.

"You were going to fuck him. Why did you stop?" There was nothing but curiosity in his voice now, a stark contrast to the murder in his eyes.

When she tried to touch him he threw her off with almost the same force as she'd tossed the Human. It hurt nothing but her heart when she hit the concrete wall at the back of the alcove, but she suspected being staked would be more bearable.

"Is that what you want, Sookie? Am I no longer enough for you? Is my love no longer enough for you?" There was still the nothingness in his voice but through their bond she could feel pain at the ragged edges and she knew it wasn't coming from her.

"No." She countered back, not knowing how to fix things but wanting emotion, _any _emotion, to fill the void she felt growing in him, pushing that pain further and further away. "What I want is for my bonded and husband to love ME! Not some silly blood bag who used to wear my face!" She hissed at him.

"Is that what you think?" He asked her, not yet rising to her bait.

"It's what I know!" She answered, venom in her voice.

"And how do you know?" Again the nothingness even as his eyes burned with something akin to hatred.

"Deny it." She challenged. "Deny that it's because of her you won't let us live as we want to! _We_ not just me, you want it too, but no matter how much you do, you want to be her good, compassionate, _tame_ Vampire more! And you want me to be meek too, you're choking me with it!" His composure broke then and the anger and hurt he felt nearly overwhelmed her.

"And so you have chosen to betray me." He said it as though he'd known this would happen for some time. "You've forgotten something though Sookie." He whispered menacingly advancing on her. "You've forgotten, no matter what happens, you… will ALWAYS…be… _mine_!"

With that he grabbed her again, only this time when he shoved her into the wall he was right there with her. His long, hard, perfect body, the only body she wanted, pressed completely against hers. Before she could utter a sound in protest or encouragement he lifted her up against the rough concrete and wrenched her thighs apart.

There was the sound of ripping fabric as he tore away her tiny gossamer panties and the scraping of a zipper as he freed himself and then he was pushing into her hard, almost pitilessly.

His beast roared in wounded rage as he took her roughly, his anger and his pain fueling every claiming thrust. Yet, she didn't stop him, didn't try to fight him off. She urged him on. Lost to her lust and the darkness of their passions Sookie moved with him, welcoming him, meeting every brutal movement with one of her own.

When she tried to put her arms around him though, his angry growl of warning was unmistakable, as was the movement of the hand not holding her up as it took both her own prisoner, forcing them up against the wall above her head.

As they careened towards their climaxes his head fell, almost unconsciously, to the crook of her neck and when it did she turned so her lips met his ear, desperate to tell him the truth, to stop him from hurting.

"I did, I tried to betray you, but I can't. Eric, I love you. No matter how much I _hate_ you for holding on to her. No matter how much I hate how you stifle us both, I love you! I stopped him because I couldn't stand the feeling of any other man's hands on me." With that her orgasm hit hard and her ability to speak went with it. There were no more words from either of them as gave into instinct and sank their fangs into each other. Their natures demanding they renew their bond, each blood desperate to comfort the other.

When it was over, Eric released her hands, but didn't put her down. Instead he pressed her farther into the wall so that her body held there even as he moved both hands to cup her face.

"Say it again." He whispered to her.

Bringing her own hands to his face, relieved she was forgiven and terrified of what she was about to admit all at once, she cupped his face between her hands as well.

"I love you." She whispered back, before laying a gentle kiss to his mouth, her tongue darting out to lick the remnants of her own blood from his lips.

"And I you." He told her back, his voice soft and low.

"I'm sorry." The words were paltry but she hoped the emotions that went with it would tell him how truly much she meant it.

"Come, it's time we left here." Was his only response as he finally let her down, taking her hand, pulling back the curtain and stalking towards the door, Pam, Thalia and Maxwell Lee falling in behind them.


	13. Chapter 13

_**A/N:**__ Not too much to say, but I wanted to clarify our timeline quickly. We made our first time jump to the beginning of October in chap 11 and then last chapter we moved to Halloween, so a couple of weeks have passed since the conversation Eric and Pam had in his driveway. Not a huge deal but important to the Pam/Miriam stuff that happens in this chapter._

_Thanks as always to everyone who's been reading, reviewing, alerting and favoriting. And of course HUGE thanks to my beta __**Northman Maille**__- luv u, luv u, luv u!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…._

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

The tense silence in the back of the limo didn't abate until Maxwell and Thalia had been dropped off at the nest they shared with Felicia. But as soon as the door closed behind the pair Pam turned to Eric, the question obvious in her eyes.

"I don't know." He answered her, sighing yet again, not realizing it was happening until the obnoxious Human sound was already half out of his mouth. It simply had to stop, the sighing, the groaning, the wariness. Something had to give and soon before he started to sparkle.

"What do you mean you don't know? He had you in there for almost an hour. He must have had some sort of point." Pam prodded.

They all knew Victor hadn't called them to his club tonight just to share the holiday spirit. They needed to figure out what it was he wanted if they were going to stay one step ahead of him.

"Victor claimed he wanted to assure me of his full support for my actions against Merlotte. He said he was pleased I had the good judgment and restraint not to shoot Compton as the messenger, but to vent the offense on its proper target. He also went out of his way to assure me that neither he nor the his Majesty were in anyway distressed about the...'destabilization' of relations between us and the Shifters and Weres in Area Five and no punishment would be forthcoming."

Pam's derisive snort made plain what she thought of that as she waved her hand in the air in exasperated emphasis.

"Oh well, as long as Victor isn't distressed I'll be able to rest easy." Pam snarked before becoming truly frustrated. "Six months after the fact. He pulled you into a private meeting over Merlotte's death and its consequences six months after the fact, just to tell you nothing you didn't already know or he couldn't have put in a Hallmark card and mailed." It made no sense.

"Are they making 'Just wanted to assure you there'll be no retribution for your violent felony' cards now? What would the cover art on such a thing look like?" Eric found himself asking without really meaning to. If there was anything he and Pam had always done well it was banter, even morbid banter… especially morbid banter, and though they probably couldn't afford to waste the time it took to make such ridiculous jokes, it helped to ease the tension slightly.

"A really cute kitten gutting an adorable puppy with a very sharp hunting knife." Pam answered dryly, a small smile lighting her face momentarily, before it went dark and worried again.

"I've said it before, I'll say it again Pam. You really should think seriously about contacting Hallmark with your idea for a Vampire friendly card line. I have a feeling I'm not the only one who would warrant or enjoy receiving such a card in the mail." He answered her back, his own dry smile in place.

"You'd have to have a known mailing address first. It's the big pitfall in my scheme for greeting card domination." She answered before getting back to business. "We're not any closer to figuring out what he really wanted."

"He wanted to separate us, so Compton could get me alone." Sookie interjected, realizing there was no time like the present to put her own suspicions out there.

The fact that Victor had wasted an hour of Eric's time on a non-conversation about a moot issue only made her feel much more certain it had all be done to get her alone and hopefully vulnerable. As Eric and Pam listened, with ever darkening expressions, she told them about her encounter with Compton and her suspicion he had guessed her secret.

"When the time comes, we will take Compton alive," Eric growled through his fangs, "and I promise I'll let you kill him slowly!" Sookie felt her own fangs slam down at Eric's words, thoughts of a strung up Compton, gutted like the adorable puppy from Pam's greeting card, dancing through her head.

"Oh, Honey! You always know exactly what to get a girl to make her feel special." She teased through coyly batted eyelashes.

Eric could only laugh in return. She might not have been the old Sookie, but there were many things about this Sookie to love, not the least of which was her willingness and ability to deftly join in the morbid banter.

And she loved him.

If for nothing else, this whole night and all of Victor and Compton's shit had been worth it to hear her say those three words once more, and to know she meant them. Pulling himself from his rapidly softening emotions Eric looked at his two children intently.

"If Compton and Victor suspect then we need to be especially cautious. Under no circumstances are you to be alone with either of them again Sookie." He instructed.

Sookie nodded, seeing no reason to even attempt disagreeing. She hated Victor and she loathed Compton, both of whom would omit no opportunity, it seemed, to try and use her against her loved ones. The only thing she wanted from either of them was to partake in their bloody and agonizing ends.

A pinging sound from Pam's purse brought them all out of their shared moment of bloodlust. If Pam could blush, Sookie thought she very well might have as she reached into her purse, with heightened speed, to retrieve her cell phone. As Pam read the contents of the text message waiting for her, Sookie sensed a surge of elation from her sister so strong she could feel it as clearly as if it were her own, even through the filter of Eric.

"It's Miriam," she explained almost giddily. "She had a doctor's appointment this afternoon, her first since we began exchanging blood. We've done so twice and her Oncologist says the tumor has shrunk so much its nearly undetectable now."

The relief in Pam's voice warmed Eric more than he could say. He had feared for his eldest child and what might happen to her if the human were to be lost. It seemed now he would not have to worry about it. Perhaps it wasn't such a horrible night after all.

"When will you make the final exchange?" He asked.

"In another week or so." Pam tried to make her answer seem offhanded, but it wasn't fooling either of her companions

"Why not now?" Eric prodded, his eye starting to gleam a little, sensing he'd stumbled on something he could use to tease her.

Pam's response was an eyebrow raised in challenge. Eric had once heard a fangbanger tell a potential rival to "bring it" just before lunging at the other Human. Eric felt that might have been an apt translation of Pam's current expression.

"Don't forget I know many, many things about you Eric that Sookie still doesn't. Don't give me a reason to reveal your more embarrassing secrets. However,_ if_ you must know, next Tuesday will be our six month anniversary. That's why I'm waiting." Pam huffed the last with feigned indignation, before crossing her arms under her chest.

She knew she'd escaped taunting for now, but it was only a matter of time. Pam remembered how she'd needled Eric relentlessly after his bonding with Sookie in Rhodes. It had all been in good fun (well mostly), and with the hopes of cheering him, since his depression, over the state of his relationship with the reticent telepath, had been as morose as she'd ever seen him till recently.

But she supposed, karmicly, she'd racked up something of a debt. She'd take it like a woman when the time came. She always took as good as she could give which was why Eric put up with her smart mouth to begin with.

She was just contemplating all the horrible things he'd probably have in store for her when she saw Sookie's expression sour at the mention of all the things Pam knew that she didn't. Before she could ask though Eric made a point of taking her hand and staring at her with intent.

"When you bond with your Human she will become a part of our family. I expect you won't keep her hidden away any longer." All thoughts of other things left Pam as she was taken by an overwhelming sense of gratitude.

It had been normal and right for her to accept Sookie as part of their little clan when she'd bonded with Eric, because Eric was her Maker. It didn't have to go the other way though. Eric was in no way obligated to accept, protect or even acknowledge his child's favored Human. The fact he would touched her deeply and reinforced her thankfulness. Of all of the Vampires who might have taken an interest in her that night so long ago she would never regret it had been him.

"I will."

They'd reached Eric's home by then and his tone turned teasing once more.

"Will you be joining us for a bit or must you run off to attend your little Human?" Ah yes, she remembered this, the not quite subtle insinuation that the mighty Vampire was now at the beck and call of a lowly Human, like a fanged lapdog. Eric was certainly wasting no time cashing in his karmic prize.

"I think I can extend my leash for a few more minutes." She answered, her tone sour even as her face betrayed her indulgence.

"Are you sure you don't need to call and check?" He laughed as he walked around to the driver's door and bent to the open window, giving the appearance of tipping their driver, when actually he was glamouring the man to forget all the night's details: whom his passengers had been, where they'd gone and what they'd spoken about.

When it was done they went inside, Eric excusing himself for a few moments to make a call to Indira, who had been in charge of the Area for the night.

"I'm happy for you." Sookie said as she and Pam made themselves comfortable across the seldom used kitchen island.

"And yet I could feel something about our conversation troubled you." Pam asked gently. She hadn't forgotten Sookie's strange expression from earlier.

"Not about our conversation, but something Compton said is… bothering me." Sookie began. "Pam, do you love Eric?" She'd told them about Bill's accusation that Eric would toss her aside, but she'd left out the part about him having already done it to Pam.

"I suppose in my way I love Eric very much, but I don't think that's really what you're asking me." Pam pushed for a little more.

She watched as Sookie struggled to put into words what was troubling her. Finally giving up after a few silent minutes, Sookie simply recounted the full conversation she'd had with Compton, knowing she'd have to tell Pam everything if she wanted a real answer.

"Is that what precipitated your…impromptu feeding?" Pam asked, her tone carefully neutral.

"I wanted to prove to myself if Eric didn't want me I could be just as happy with someone else. Instead, I ended up realizing it'll never be that simple." Sookie said the last with a touch of anger Pam could tell was inwardly aimed.

"Sookie, Compton told you the truth. Eric and I were lovers for a brief time, but it was never the way he implied. Eric made me because he longed for a companion, not because he longed for a lover. That part of our relationship barely lasted past the first year and it ended because I wished it to.

I realized quite quickly that I infinitely preferred women, something I'd already suspected when I was Human, but had never really been given the chance to explore. Eric did not cast me off. If anyone could have been said to do the casting off it would have been me. And he won't cast you off ever. Eric loves you, in a way he has never loved anyone or anything." Pam tried to ignore the tingle of déjà vu that tickled the back of her mind as she said those last words. They were almost exactly the same ones she'd spoken to Human Sookie six months ago during the pre-dawn phone call which had started her on the path she to becoming a Vampire.

"He loves the person I was." Sookie said almost dismissively, though the hint of hurt in her tone was apparent.

"You don't really believe that do you? Because, frankly, if you do I'll have to start giving you less credit than I have been." Pam own voice was dismissive of her sister's self-indulgent comment. "If I can feel the sincerity of his love for you, his pride in you, then you certainly must be able to as well.

Yes, he loved you as you were and you loved him. But he also loves you as you are now as you love him. You have to move past this Sookie. You can't keep punishing him for something he has no control over. If you're going to be happy together, as I assume you wish to be now that you know simply moving on to another isn't going to work, accept what was and move forward. You're a Vampire now, and a wonderful one, but if you dwell on the past in this way you'll lose yourself."

The expression Sookie gave her was one of near hopelessness. She did love Eric and she knew he loved her as well, but that wasn't the whole of it.

"It's not just that, at least not solely for itself. Pam, I can't control this thing inside me much longer." She confessed suddenly, her voice a near whisper. "Every time I push this urge to kill down inside me, it gets stronger, harder to lock away, not easier. I don't know how much longer I can keep it caged and I don't want to. I want to be what I am." When Sookie looked at her this time it was with desperate eyes. Pam could feel Sookie silently pleading with her, hoping Pam would tell her how to make it go away.

"You were part Fairy when you lived, now you're a Vampire. Perhaps being the whole of two such deeply instinctive halves is making it so hard to control the bloodlust. I wish I could give you an answer that would ease your mind or give you some hope it will get better, but I can't. All I can tell you Sookie, is Eric will never be in a position to allow you to give free reign to it.

It's true Eric has held you so in check because he fears that if you remember yourself you won't forgive him for it and he's right. You don't remember but I do, and you wouldn't be able to get over it. But Sookie, in the situation we're in now, with Victor, with the new King, with the way the world is now, Humans watching our every move, Eric can't allow you to kill without just cause. It would destroy everything he's worked and fought for and it would lead to all of our downfalls. I know you love him and you know, deep down, he loves you for you too. You have to decide what means more to you, Eric's love or your compulsions, no matter how strong."

They sat staring at each other for a long while, neither of them saying anything until Eric reappeared and the conversation moved to other things. But Sookie knew Pam, in the way Pam always did, had distilled everything down to one very simple to express, but impossible to reconcile, choice. She found herself wishing for the very first time in a long time that she hadn't forgotten herself.


	14. Chapter 14

_**A/N:**__ I never know how much or how little to reveal in an author's note. As we head into the next part of the story, I want to reassure the people who are worried that everything is going to be okay, but at the same time I don't want to spoil it for those who'd rather be surprised. I'm the type of person who reads the endings of books before I buy them so I know what I'm getting into, but I know not everyone's like that. _

_So I'll just say, as you're reading, please repeat over and over again- HEA for Eric and Sookie, HEA for Pam and Miriam. You have my word for both of those, if I just skipped there from the get-go though this wouldn't be much of a story._

_Thanks to everyone who's continued to follow this fic. You're kind words are so encouraging and uplifting and they've really kept me writing when motivation was scarce._

_And of course thanks to my beta __**Northman Maille**__. You da bomb girl, I can't say it enough!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…._

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

It was odd, Eric reflected, how one perceived the passage of time when mortality was no longer a concern. Whole centuries could pass at a monotonous plod, one decade blending into another without being noticed, boredom the only threat to one's existence. Then suddenly it would be punctuated by periods of intensity, either good or bad.

Eric wasn't sure how he would have categorized the last several years.

On the one hand, he'd had more adventure and excitement in that short time than in the last two centuries before it combined. He'd found and won the love of an extraordinary woman and he'd felt more than he had since he was Human. On the other, all the stability and security he'd worked so hard to build here in Louisiana had been lost. His existence had been in almost constant jeopardy, and the burden of always being on alert had begun to wear on him.

If he managed to live through DeCastro's reign, Victor's scheming, and Sookie's Vampire adolescence, he promised himself he would never take the boring periods for granted again!

Looking around Fangtasia tonight, seeing the half empty main room, he wondered if it weren't truly time to raise anchor and leave. It was only his devotion to his people, who would surely suffer if he abandoned them to Victor, and, he admitted somewhat begrudgingly, his pride that was holding him here.

In the three months since Victor had opened his club, Fangtasia's clientele had dwindled to a trickle. The tourists still came, feeling Fangtasia was the safer option for 'seeing a Vampire up close', but the fangbangers, their bread and butter (quite literally), had flocked en masse to The Crypt. On the few occasions Eric had been summoned there, it was clear, on top of its gothic, industrial feel, feeding rules were far more laxly enforced. The atmosphere was therefore that much more dangerous. It was something he knew greatly appealed to the desperate creatures who once flocked to his door anxious to be bitten, drained, turned or any combination of the three.

He felt a hand make contact with his thigh and tried to suppress the smile of pleasure he felt as Sookie slid into the booth beside him. They were on floor duty tonight and so had to keep a strict façade of aloof mystery, but he could feel she sensed his morose mood and wanted to do whatever she could to lighten it.

When they left for the night he had no doubt he would be in for a fierce, satisfying training session and an even fiercer and more satisfying round of relieving the bloodlust such exercise always caused. It was at moments like those they were always at their best together and he found he'd become every bit as dependent on them as she was, as a way to handle all that was being thrown at them.

"Jason Stackhouse phoned me tonight." She said, her voice barely a whisper so their conversation would not be overheard.

He turned to her then, his face betraying nothing, but their bond awash with cautious curiosity. Sookie had called her brother in the days just after Merlotte's murder, to assure him she was all right and that she'd chosen the life she had now. She'd done a superb job of pretending nothing was amiss, and her brother, never the sharpest tool, accepted everything with barely a grunt in reply. Eric had never been more grateful for Jason's total failure as both a brother and a man than he had been that night.

"What did he want?" He asked, his voice equally low.

"He's marrying his girlfriend. He wanted to know if I would attend the ceremony. I told him I couldn't but he didn't seem to want to accept that. He said he…missed me." She said the last words as though they had a foreign, distasteful flavor to them. "He apologized for some incident that occurred. I couldn't make it all out really, but it seems I participated in some Panther ritual and was forced to injure someone on his behalf. He seems to think this is why I continue not to speak to him and he promised me he'd changed. I'm not sure what to do. He doesn't seem very bright, but I doubt I could fool my own brother for an entire night no matter how dense he is."

"Do you wish to attend?" Eric's reply was cautiously voiced. He had no desire to begin another fight about her past and her lost memories. "_If _you do, we could attend together." He watched as she thought over his offer.

"No. I don't want to pretend even more than I usually have to. He means nothing to me." She said after a moment.

Eric only nodded, accepting her decision and keeping his face and his emotions carefully neutral. He had promised himself the night of the Halloween party, when she'd admitted she loved him again in spite of all that was against them, that he would only look forward from now on. He knew some part of him would always mourn for what could have been, but he had carefully walled those emotions off. They were bound too tightly and he still loved her too much to risk losing her over a future that was no longer even possible.

"Very well, if he persists, I will handle him."

The hand that still rested on his thigh squeezed slightly in covert thanks for his understanding. She was about to say something else when Pam walked through the front door. Both of them raised a single eyebrow in mirrored gestures of surprise, tonight was Pam's night off and they hadn't expected to see her.

It didn't escape either of their notices that she was looking more and more gaunt with each passing night, her skin sallow and her expression exhausted in a way a Vampire should never be. This time when Sookie's hand squeezed his thigh, Eric knew it was in deep concern. Sookie might have lost her memories and many of her personality traits, but her loyalty to those she loved seemed a constant, and since the number of her loved ones had fallen to just Pam and himself, the fierceness of that devotion had increased a hundred fold.

Pam took the seat across from them, dropping into it with a gracelessness that was normally foreign to her being. Once she was settled a waitress came to them placing three True Bloods onto the table with a silent bow and slinking away. Sookie tried to quell the desire to gag, an effect the abominable substance always seemed to produce in her, and was shocked to watch Pam knock the whole bottle back in three quick gulps.

The situation with Miriam had taken a downturn only scant weeks after their bonding. The cancer, it seemed, wouldn't go without a fight. Her tumor would shrink whenever she ingested large amounts of Vampire blood but then seemed to return, growing to ever greater size, each time Pam stopped feeding her in quantity. Each time the tumor returned it required even larger amounts of blood to shrink again and the cycle was quickly depleting Pam, weakening her dangerously.

A week ago things seemed to reach rock bottom. Miriam's doctor had informed her, the cancer had finally moved into her bloodstream and was spreading throughout her body. It forced Pam and Miriam to make a hard choice, but it was the only one which made sense, since they all knew letting Miriam die was not an option.

"Did you get an answer?" Sookie asked, unable at her young age, to keep all the anxiety out of her voice.

The look of derisive disgust Pam made was all the answer either of them really needed.

"Victor denied your request?" Pam only nodded her head at Eric's question. "For what reason?" His voice was still cool, even though both his children could clearly feel his rage beginning to bubble up beneath the surface.

"Louisiana's Vampire population is apparently too high. He claims he's not accepting any petitions for turnings right now. He told me I should appeal to him again in six months." The defeat in Pam's voice was palpable when she finally spoke.

"If you stop feeding her your blood she'll be dead in six months. If you don't, in six months you'll be drained to the point of permanent damage." Eric bit out from between clenched teeth.

Pam chose to answer without words again, giving them a hopeless looking nod of her head.

Glancing over at the bar Eric summoned one of the waitresses. She was new, healthy, plump and barely bitten.

"Take her in the back, feed. I need you to appear strong and healthy. We're going to see Victor." He ordered, his tone broking no refusal from anyone at the table.

Pam obeyed without question, her hunger outweighing any objection she might have had to feeding from anyone but her bonded. There was simply no choice. Miriam could not feed her now and True Blood would not strengthen her. Whatever Eric had planned they couldn't go to Victor with her looking the way she did.

When Pam had disappeared to the back with the waitress, Eric turned to Sookie.

"I need you to stay here. Can you do this?" He asked, his meaning plain. Could she control herself? Could he trust her?

"I promise nothing will happen, Eric. I won't disgrace you again." Her words were softly spoken but the conviction in them was as clear as the determination in her blood. She would never make the mistake she'd made before again.

Not caring one bit what the tourists or the few paltry fangbangers in the room thought, Eric leaned in and kissed her, hard, on the lips, his passion, his love and his trust clearly evident.

"Thank you, love." He said softly, against her lips, reluctant to pull away.

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

A half hour later they arrived at The Crypt. The building was vibrating with the heavy techno beat, just as it had on Halloween night. Unlike Halloween though, the crowd was mostly Human. Drunken, half naked Fangbangers writhed to the beat of the music, as Vampires strategically placed all around the main floor, watched intently.

It seemed very much like Fangtasia until one looked up. On the floors above, Vampires were openly feeding and fucking. Without even trying Eric picked out one male Vampire with a shaved head, wearing nothing but studded leather shorts, being serviced by a Human female while he watched two other naked women fuck each other with their mouths on the floor in front of him.

On the level above them he saw two female Vampires taking turns on a Human male, biting and fucking him for a few minutes and then trading off. On the main floor Eric saw another male Vampire point into the crowd and watched as the fangbanger he'd chosen stumbled up to him, opening her top as she did. When she finally made it to where he sat, he pulled her sideways into his lap, ripping her open shirt off and biting into her breast without warning, causing her to scream out in a mix of pleasure and pain as she began to writhe on his lap.

The entire club was one over stimulated Vampire away from a massacre and above it all, watching the action from the top level, was Victor, with Compton standing beside him.

Compton had officially become Victor's second in the last months and Eric had no doubt he'd obtained the position by telling Victor every little thing he could about Eric, Sookie and Pam. His only comfort in it all was if Victor succeeded in taking him down he would no doubt end Compton in the next second, the exact moment he was no longer useful. If Victor failed then Eric would have the pleasure of watching Sookie rend him to pieces slowly. Either way Compton's days were numbered.

"How is he getting away with this?" Pam sneered from between clenched teeth, not sure if she was excited or repulsed by the display taking place around them.

Having no answer for how Victor was so flagrantly flouting the law, Eric simply began climbing the scaffolding, Pam a step behind him.

"Your business here Sheriff?" The guard at the door to the top floor asked when they arrived, stepping into Eric's path.

"I require an audience with Lieutenant Madden." Eric answered, his voice steady even as his fangs itched to slam down at the younger, lower ranking Vampire's tone.

"He's not expecting you." The guard answered, a nasty, fanged smile breaking across his face.

"Let them enter, Lucius." They heard Victor call from behind the door, his voice dripping with boredom. The guard's smile turned sour as he moved out of their way, but Eric knew better than to gloat over such a small victory.

Entering the room Eric saw it was every bit as tackily decorated as it had been the last time he was there. The couch was new though, royal purple now instead of red. Given what was happening below them Eric could make a good guess at what had necessitated its replacement.

"Eric, what an unexpected surprise, what brings you to my little slice of Shreveport tonight? All is well with Area Five I hope." Victor's smile was every bit as oily as ever as he feigned pleased shock at their appearance.

"Area Five is in order as always, Victor, thank you." He said, betraying nothing even as his mind pictured all the bloody ways he could end Victor right here in this room.

"And your lovely wife, how is dearest Sookie tonight? It's such a shame she didn't join you. I know my second always delights in any opportunity to spend time with her, don't you Bill."

Holding on hard to his control Eric ignored the absurd insinuation and nodded his head slightly.

"She is well, thank you. She did not wish to come tonight. Apparently the prospect of Bill's company was not a great enough incentive to compel her to leave Fangtasia." The anger that briefly flared in Bill's normally cool eyes was another tiny triumph, but pleasurable nonetheless.

"A pity, though I understand. May I offer you refreshment? We were just about to sit down to a drink." Victor chuckled and, as if on cue, the door opened, revealing several clearly intoxicated, barely dressed fangbangers, the scent of desire and desperation rolling off of them in waves.

"No thank you, we've already fed tonight." Eric said as he watched the group of women take in the Vampires in the room.

Several of them made pouty faces when they heard his refusal, but contented themselves by surrounding and fawning over Victor. It didn't escape Eric's notice that Compton took only one of them: a bottle blond with fake breasts whose blue eyes where the result of obvious contact lenses. He wondered if she'd been specially ordered just for him.

Victor sat himself on the couch, gesturing for Eric and Pam to take the one across from him. His meals followed him, draping themselves around him. Pulling one into his lap and stroking her neck, he looked expectantly at Eric.

"Why have you come?" His voice was somewhat less friendly all of the sudden.

"You refused Pam's request to turn her bonded companion. I wish to know why?" Eric stated simply, no emotion in his voice.

"Then you've wasted your time, my friend. I told her the reason when I refused her. We're still rebuilding the state, I don't see the need to add any more Vampires to the equation at present. She can make her request again in a half year and I will give it all due consideration." Stifling the urge to bite back in anger Eric forcibly calmed himself.

"Pam's Human will not last that long. She is gravely ill. As Pam is my second and not simply any Vampire, I am within my bounds to take my request higher up the ladder. I am choosing to ask you to reconsider first." Eric was careful to keep his voice neutral for the moment.

"My decision stands." Victor all but growled as his fangs shot down. It was an overt display of hostility but one that was over almost as soon as it began, replaced just as suddenly as it had come, with a smile that reeked of satisfaction. "You are indeed free to appeal my decision to his Majesty. However I wonder, given your current circumstances, if that's really so wise an idea, Eric.

You've already stated Pam's Human is ill. There is a good possibility she will not survive the turning and even if she does there's no guarantee she will come out the other end undamaged. His Majesty has no desire to add a weak or addled Vampire to his ranks. Something which I am told may have happened once already under your watch. Something which I believe you have intentionally kept hidden.

If you wish to push this matter with Felipe so be it. But I will then be forced to inform him of the suspicions dear Bill has shared with me about your own bonded. Of course it's nothing concrete, I could be entirely wrong, but are you willing to take the risk, Eric? You know what happens to damaged Vampires. I would hate for anything untoward to befall your lovely Sookie."

No, he wouldn't kill Madden. He'd keep him alive, _for centuries_, while he tortured him night after night after night, ripping limbs and gutting organs. He wondered how many times he'd have to feed Madden his own limp cock before it finally stopped growing back altogether.

The thoughts consumed Eric so thoroughly, for a moment, he almost failed to see the look of angry shock that skittered across Bill's face before being promptly replaced with his normal mask of superior boredom…almost.

It became clear then that Bill had overplayed his hand. He'd obviously been under the impression, when he shared his suspicions with Madden, that if they proved true, Victor would, after killing Pam and himself, remand the 'damaged' Sookie into Bill's care. At least Bill would know now what an entirely foolhardy choice he'd made, trusting Madden. Little good though it would do any of them at this point.

Smoothing his face into a smile that matched Victor's for sincerity and friendliness, Eric shrugged his shoulders in a nonchalant gesture.

"You know how you've come by Compton's loyalty Victor. I suggest you take anything he shares with you in that spirit and take heed you share as little with him as possible. You wouldn't want the next Vampire he crawls to knowing where you rest." With that Eric rose to his full height, looked down on Victor with an air of disdain and walked out, 'forgetting' to bow as he did.

Only when they reached the safety of the still busy streets did Eric and Pam let their guard down. Both of them visibly relaxing from stances that were ready for an ambush or an attack at any moment.

"Well that was a cluster fuck." Pam said, her voice on the ragged edge of anxiety.

"It was not an ideal outcome, but it was not a waste either. I now have confirmation Sookie's suspicions were correct and Victor knows about her condition and you now know Felipe would not be a help to the situation with your bonded. Uplifting discoveries: no. Necessary information: yes. They will help us both to better decide our next moves."

Being pragmatic had always been one of Eric's strengths, but Pam had to admire his ability to detach from this particular situation. Especially since she'd felt his rage shooting through her veins like molten silver when Victor threatened Sookie.

She was about to ask Eric what it was he felt they should do next when it hit them both like a punch directly to the gut. The Corvette swerved violently into oncoming traffic, cars trying desperately to avoid them and horns blaring as Eric struggled to get his grip back on the steering wheel. At the same time Pam felt herself gasp for a suddenly, desperately needed breath, as the sensation ripped through both of them, shocking, painful and urgent.

It was the call.

Finally pulling the Corvette to the side of the road, Eric tried to regain control of his body as Pam clutched her chest, the echo of the pain they'd both felt still radiating there. When the sting of it finally subsided and didn't come back again, the two of them shared one moment of stunned dread. There was only being who had the power to call them both. Looking at each other they spoke at the same time.

"Ocella."

The word was barely out of either of their mouths when Eric gunned the engine, his foot pressing the gas pedal all the way to the floor and his hand running through the gears as fast as the car could handle, desperate to get them back to Fangtasia as quickly as possible. It was where they were being compelled and it was where Sookie was, alone with his Maker.

Eric didn't even bother to pull into Fangtasia's lot as they came zooming up on the club. Instead he simply slammed on the brakes on the side of the street, streaking out towards the bar without even bothering to close the door behind him. He knew Pam was directly behind him too, equally heedless of the car when her sister was alone with his sire.

They were in the club and through Eric's office door, nearly taking the thing off its hinges when Eric stopped in his tracks, a cold, icy sensation running up his spine as he took in the sight before him.

There stood his Maker in the middle of the room, Sookie standing not more than a few inches from him, her chin held firmly in his ancient grasp as he seemed to look her up and down with an expression Eric could not name.

"Master." He said, dropping to his knees, trying to keep his anxiety buried deep inside of him. "It has been many centuries." He intoned respectfully, still not looking up from the floor. "Why have you come?"

Ocella's first answer was a laugh, the sound self-assured and arrogant as always.

"Eric, it hardly sounds as though you're happy to see me when you put such a question to me only moments after we are reunited. But I suppose you're worry is not without justification. I _was_ here to rid myself of the obstacle that is your bonded, but now…," Ocella made a low sound of approval, the same kind one might make after the first taste of a fine wine, "I'm no longer sure."


	15. Chapter 15

_**A/N:**__ So Ocella's arrived. I admit, I was thoroughly disappointed by his appearance in DitF. There was so much build up for what turned out to be a whole lot of nothing. While I enjoyed making him thoroughly evil in my last SVM story, I thought I would try something different this time. _

_I don't think anything could make Ocella cuddly, but I was intrigued, as I re-read the book in preparation for this story, by how both Alexei and_ _Eric defend Ocella's character. They both called him an honorable man and it seemed, for everything he did, not even Eric thought he was without one or two redeeming qualities. _

_I thought it would be challenging to try to portray him that way: flawed certainly, but not evil. I don't know if I succeeded, but that's what I'm trying for._

_Okay, thanks SO much to my beta __**Northman Maille**__ and to everyone who's been reading reviewing, favoriting and alerting!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…_

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Again Eric marveled at the passage of time. Whole centuries had passed faster than the seemingly endless moment in which he knelt on his office floor, entirely helpless, watching as his Maker continue to clutch Sookie's chin, and her existence, between his fingers.

Not a single expression crossed Ocella's face as he weighed his choice: whether or not to take everything that mattered from Eric, a second time, with a single, simple action. Then, as if he hadn't come with the sole intention to murder one of his own blood Ocella dropped his hand and turned to face Eric and Pam.

"Pamela, why don't you take the young ones out to the bar so your Master and I may speak of important matters." He said gesturing to both Sookie and a young, male Vampire Eric suddenly realized was also in the room.

Pam made one indecipherable expression before first bowing deeply to Ocella and then ushering her sister and the other hurriedly out of the room. Eric could feel Pam was close to buckling from all the stress and worry they'd been under for so long, but there was nothing he could do for her. He needed all his wits for himself right now if he were to deal with his Maker.

When he and Ocella were alone again, he stood to his full height, ignoring the tingle in the back of his mind reminding him his height, age and strength were no deterrent for his Maker. Ocella might be almost a foot shorter than him, but it meant nothing. He could, and had, on occasion, broken Eric with little more than a flick of his wrist.

"You prove again you have truly excellent taste my child. I have made it a point to keep tabs on you, even with all of my travels, and I must say I was shocked when I heard you had supposedly fallen under the spell of a Human woman.

I did not believe it at first. I know I taught you better than that. But when word reached me you'd bonded to her, I could not ignore the fact the rumors must have been true. My faith in you is restored though, now I see you've turned her. And she is truly magnificent.

When I found her here alone I thought I would make quick work of her, but she surprised me. She anticipated my attack and pulled a knife on me. She knew how much older I was. She knew she had no chance, but still she would have preferred to die fighting rather than meet her end on her knees, begging for her life, as many a fledgling would have done." Ocella's tone was one of impressed delight and Eric knew few things impressed or delighted his Maker any more. Still he knew better than to allow Ocella's words to lull him into any sense of security.

"Why should you want to end her?" He asked cautiously as they stared at each other from across the room.

"Regrettably, she now stands in the way of my plans for you. It's ironic actually. I was greatly displeased to find you'd fallen in love with a Human and yet, if she had remained Human she would not be any kind of obstacle." Ocella shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly.

"What plans are these?" Eric hoped if he could find out what Ocella wanted he might be able to steer him from his purpose. He knew full well that Sookie's actions, however admirable, had probably only delayed Ocella from carrying out his plan and not changed his Maker's mind.

"The Vampire I brought with me, Alexei, is my new child. He is almost a century old but he is…troubled. We have had a hard time of it in Europe where rules are so much stricter, and so I decided to bring him to the New World for a while.

We have been traveling around for a bit and I thought perhaps a visit to you might be good for him. After all, you are my greatest creation. I thought meeting his elder brother might help him. Unfortunately, on our way here we stopped in Oklahoma. When Queen Freyda heard I was in her territory she invited me to court for a visit. While there Alexei behaved…disappointingly. I now find myself in her debt. When I happened to mention I was coming to see you, her interest was sparked and she was suddenly willing to bargain with me." Eric felt his long unbeating heart drop into his feet at his Maker's last words.

"Master, what have you promised her?" His voice was barely above a whisper.

"Freyda will overlook the incident if you agree to marry her." Ocella answered simply, as though it were no great thing to have sold one of his children in payment for the wrongs of the other.

"I cannot marry her. I am married already." Eric's knew even as he said it, he told Ocella nothing of which his Master was not already aware.

"And there's the rub," came his Maker's emotionless reply. "As I said, if she were still a Human there would be no issue, but now…."

For a moment Eric's mind was devoid of its usual detached calculation. Nothing seemed to register except the fact the next moments, here in this office, would determine whether his love lived or not.

It had been centuries since he'd done as he was about to, though he still remembered the degradation of it keenly. Still, he would do anything, say anything,_ promise_ anything if it meant her life, and so without another thought he went down on his knees once more prepared to plead humiliatingly, if that was what it would take.

"I beg you, do not kill her. I…I will not survive it. If you kill her you kill me as well." He had spent many decades, after Ocella had given him his freedom, learning how to block their bond, but he opened it now.

He threw it as wide as it would go so his Maker would feel the truth of his words. So he would know if he destroyed Sookie there would be nothing left of Eric either, and his plans would fall apart anyway.

It was almost a shock when he felt Ocella's hand on the top of his head, caressing his hair with affection, as though in comfort.

"I feel your love for her." Ocella's voice was thoughtful, almost compassionate, though Eric was sure compassion was something his Maker had never felt for anything or anyone. "Alexei is equally dear to me. It is why I have not ended him yet, though in truth, I am fully aware I should.

I cannot change what has been done, Eric. Freyda has contacted Felipe for his approval and your King has already given his permission, but…perhaps there is another way. Come, let us join the young ones. I will think on it and we will talk more tomorrow." With that his Maker's hand was gone leaving Eric stunned enough he barely noticed he was now alone in his office.

Still dazed Eric walked out into the mostly empty main room to find them all sitting at the center table together. Ocella and Pam sat silently each seemingly lost in their own thoughts while Alexei and Sookie conversed almost animatedly.

Heedless of what it might look like to others, Eric took the empty seat next to Sookie and brought his chair as close to hers as possible, so their bodies were touching along their length. He could feel a sense of trepidation from her, but she kept it locked down tight. She chose instead to appear as though she was unconcerned over the things that happened in his office, unwilling to show weakness when she knew it was being looked for.

It was one of the things he loved most about her. It was one of the things he'd always loved about her, truthfully. Whether Human or Vampire, Sookie would never give another the satisfaction of seeing her fear. He wondered if she was totally aware she only continued to exist at this moment because of that spirit and tenacity. It had shocked Ocella into indecision and he could only pray his Maker would continue to see how unique and amazing she was.

That night, locked safely behind the doors of their day chamber Eric held Sookie close. For the first time in their almost year together as Maker and child there were no wild, unrestrained joinings or passionate unions filled with the overwhelming need to be one in body and blood. They simply clung to each other until death took them. Their cool bodies pressed tightly against one another, trying desperately to find comfort in the feel of one another, as each felt the noose of their troubles tightening around them.

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

Eric rose the next night to the feeling of the call. It was far gentler than it had been the night before, but it compelled him from his bed and Sookie's side nonetheless. Leaving her there, still at her rest, he made his way to the living room where his master waited for him, already sitting in the waning pink and purple light of dusk and staring into the empty fireplace. It had only been dark for perhaps fifteen minutes, but the living room was equipped with black out shutters and Eric wondered how long Ocella had already been sitting there.

"Master." Eric intoned, his head slightly bowed as he stood in the doorway.

Ocella did not look at him as he gestured for Eric to sit on the couch, nor did he look at his child when Eric was settled. He remained the entire time, staring as though he were seeing something in the nothing of the empty grate.

"I spoke with Alexei last night before we went to rest. He is quite taken with Sookie and thanked me for not ending her as I had planned." He began, his voice almost troubled sounding. "He was mostly dead when I turned him and is sometimes…unstable, prone to violent fits and ungovernable emotions. I had hoped he might be calmed by your presence through the blood, but now as things stand that will not be possible. Perhaps Sookie could be an alternative."

"What do you mean?" Eric felt his chest tighten.

"I told you Eric, I cannot change what has happened. Freyda wishes to marry you and Felipe is in agreement with the idea. But if you were to renounce your marriage to Sookie I would let her live and take her back to Europe with me. Perhaps helping to care for a young one will help Alexei govern his own emotions better as well."

"What title did you negotiate for Eric?" Both of them turned around at the sound of another voice.

Standing in the doorway, in nothing but one of his T-shirts, stood Sookie. Her hair was still tousled from sleep but her eyes were wide with something Eric could not quite name. The emotion was a barely suppressed mix of anxiety, excitement, fear, and anticipation, no one being more predominant than the others. As he experienced it second hand, it gave Eric a feeling he'd often heard Humans refer to as butterflies in the stomach.

Turning back to his Maker, Eric saw Ocella's own eyes widen at the sudden, brazen interruption of what was meant to be a private conversation. He feared, for a moment, that Sookie had undone all of her good work from the night before, but as he opened his mouth to answer the corners of Ocella's lips twitched up. It was a look of indulgent interest.

"He will be Prince Consort of Oklahoma and will remain Sheriff of this area as well." Ocella answered her, his voice perfectly neutral.

"Prince Consort. Then Eric would outrank Louisiana's lieutenant, yes?" Sookie prodded, taking one step further into the room, leaving her standing in a pool of moonlight that shone in through the now uncovered windows.

"The paperwork will be arriving tonight with the completed negotiation, but yes, as Prince Eric would outrank anyone in either state except the King and Queen." Ocella responded, curiosity tingeing his tone as he again indulged her with an answer.

Sookie nodded her head to Ocella and Eric watched as she seemed to contemplate everything she must have heard from the doorway. Then suddenly she was in front of Eric, kneeling at his feet, her hands on his knees as she pinned him with a solemn gaze.

"If you outrank Victor then you can grant Pam's request to turn Miriam, and he won't be able to do a thing stop it. If you outrank him, you and your people would be safe. He would be going not just against you, but against Felipe himself." Her eyes were wide as she said these things, almost as though they were occurring to her for the first time and he saw pained realization behind the knowledge she was putting together.

Before he could make any answer the sound of a key in the lock of the front door caught all of their attentions. It opened to reveal Pam, holding a stack of papers in her hand. Bowing in respect to Ocella, Pam made her way to Eric and Sookie and held the papers out to him.

"These were couriered to Fangtasia during the day. They came with a note from Sandy Seachrest. She'll be arriving tomorrow night to personally collect them."

Taking the papers from Pam's hand, Eric scanned them quickly. It didn't take a genius to figure out what was in this for Felipe and why he'd been so quick to agree to the arrangement Freyda and Ocella had proposed.

Everyone came out a winner in this. Ocella's debt, for whatever offense his younger child had committed, would be cleared. Freyda got both a powerful husband who would, because of his lower rank, remain subservient to her and assurance that a neighboring King, who had proven himself aggressive and untrustworthy, would not be setting his greedy eyes on her state next.

Felipe, who Eric was now convinced had foolishly overextended himself by taking two states at once, both so far from his home base, would receive the same assurance that no threat of aggression existed and both Monarchs would have to venture almost nothing for their gains. Since they hadn't married each other neither would be obligated to stick their necks out for the other if anyone else caused them trouble.

It was a perfect solution to everyone's problems and all it required was the complete disregard of a single existence…his own. Throwing the documents on the coffee table, Eric stood and began pacing the length of the room, his mind running scenario after scenario to escape and coming up against a brick wall each time. Only the sudden death of his Maker and two Monarchs would get him out of this unanticipated trap.

"Sign the papers Eric." Ocella's voice was firm but there was no Maker's command in it…yet.

Eric wanted to scream at him that he and Sookie were married by Vampire law, no one could forcibly separate them, but he knew that wasn't true. Ocella had already made plain what Eric's choices were. He signed or Sookie died. Eric and Pam and Sookie might be able to fight him, but their chances of winning barely came out even and if they lost, Ocella might kill Pam too in punishment for his obstinacy.

His mind was so full of rebellion he'd barely been aware of anything else, but a movement from the corner of his eye brought him back just in time to see Sookie kneel down in front of the coffee table, a pen in her grasp. She flipped through the documents until she came to one that annulled their marriage. The pen shaking in her hand she signed on the dotted line next to her printed name.

"Sookie…." It came out barely a whisper as his disbelief nearly choked him, but when she stood again he saw that her face was etched in determined lines.

"Victor will no longer be a threat to you. Pam will be able to save Miriam. I will be free to live as I have wanted to and you will be free of any guilt in my choices. Sign it Eric." Her eyes pleaded with him and Eric knew there was sense in her words, but all he could feel was an all engulfing sense of betrayal.

"Is that really it, Sookie? Does killing really mean that much more to you?" He asked, the cold balm of anger settling in where the hurt had wanted to burn, almost as painfully as silver.

Sookie looked around the room. At some point Alexei had joined them as well and it was clear she hated saying what she was about to in front of an audience. She knew even if they left the room there was no place in the house where the others would be unable to hear them, but she still she held out her hand to him, imploring him to come with her.

Eric followed her into his study, everything seeming dazed and dreamlike as his mind fought to resist what was about to happen. When the door was closed behind them she finally spoke.

"No Eric, it's not the only reason, but it is the truth. You know as well as I do that you're only fighting this is to keep me. In every other way this is best for everyone, you included!

I know you love me, but you will never love me more than you loved her and you will never allow me to be who I am because of it. You know I love you, but it's not enough. I am what I am and I will never have peace if I have to keep fighting it. Let me go."

Eric could only shake his head at her words. He'd known since the moment he'd found her playing with Merlotte's heart this night would come. He'd known it was only a matter of time, but he'd never thought it would come so soon. He could still hear the old Sookie's promises to love him for eternity ringing in his ears. And now, barely a year later, she was begging him to free her.

"Alexei is insane Sookie. All of this has been brought on us by his actions. You cannot expect me to give you my blessing to leave with him." Sookie nodded her head, as though she'd known he would say just that.

"I know he's not well. He…showed me some of what happened to him before he was turned. It's not surprising. But your Maker will be there and perhaps the both of us can help him." Sookie's eyes pleaded with him again and he found himself willing to offer anything to keep her from leaving.

"Pam, what about Pam? She could guide you."

"Pam will have a newborn Vampire of her own to take care of in a little while. It's unfair for either of us to ask her to care for me as well. Besides, if I do this…I…you can't expect me to stay here and watch you marry another woman. I can't do it. Let me go. Let me get this…thing inside of me out. Your Maker will help me."

Her eyes were pleading again and Eric knew there was nothing more he could say. She was right. By this one act so many problems would be solved. And all he had to do was bury once and for all the love he had for her. Turn away from any hope of the forever they'd promised each other.

Eric almost laughed when he remembered how shocked he was to realize something had gone wrong and she no longer remembered him. He'd been so terrified he would never get her back, terrified he would be unable to spend eternity with a stranger who bore her likeness. He'd clung to the hope for so long that the 'real' Sookie would come back to him. He'd never expected to fall in love this version of her too. He'd never dreamed a Sookie so different would capture his heart just as the surely as her Human version had.

But she had.

He'd been powerless to stop himself from loving her wildness, from adoring her passion and pleasure for the hunt, her excitement at the prospect of a good fight. He remembered his words to Pam that night in his driveway and cursed them for the truth they were. No matter what form she took, he was doomed to love Sookie Stackhouse for all eternity. He was doomed to love her and, it seemed, he was doomed to lose her, over and over again.

He knew Ocella would teach her well. He would have no reservation about encouraging her darker desires, honing her violent instincts and refining her most ruthless tendencies. With his two thousand years on this earth he would teach her how to do it all without ever leaving the shadows. Eric knew he would never have survived as long as he had if it weren't for Ocella's teachings, and for all he'd sometimes hated his Maker, he had always had deep respect for him as a Vampire. Ocella was an exceptional Vampire and he would make Sookie one as well. And Ocella would do it without ever having to bend her or break her has he had Eric. What Ocella had forced upon Eric, Sookie would be eager to accept.

"Ask Ocella to come in and then go with Pam and Alexei to Fangtasia to eat. We will join you there later."

Sookie nodded her head and left the room without another world. She'd barely been gone a moment when Eric felt his Maker behind him.

"You will care for her… as if she were your own?" He asked, turning to face Ocella.

There was a momentary look of satisfaction on Ocella's face, but it was soon replaced with one Eric had never seen before. In all their time together Ocella had always treated him as an inferior. Ocella was Master and Eric was his child, no matter how long Eric lived it would always be so. But now, Ocella seemed to regard him with a respect that had never been there before, as one Maker to another.

"I give you my word. I will let her be what she wishes to be, but I will guide her as I guided you…well almost as I guided you." Ocella said the last with a small upturn to his mouth and Eric knew exactly what he meant.

He knew his Maker to be honorable. He had given his word to care for Sookie and so Eric believed he would. He would make her great and he would do it without ever using the one tool in his arsenal Eric had hated so much. He would never force Sookie into any kind of physical relationship. As a female she was utterly safe from him in that way.

"You will tell me how she fares, often." It was the first time he'd ever requested anything of his Maker but he did it, without fear. He knew it was a small matter compared to this thing he'd essentially just agreed to.

"I will contact you once each year to let you know how she fares." Eric nodded.

"And you will say nothing of it to her." Ocella nodded again.

"Then I will do as you bid me, Master."


	16. Chapter 16

_**A/N:**__ I hope everyone had a really awesome holiday weekend!_

_Thank you so much for the responses to last chapter. I know it was a hard one and I appreciate all your thoughts and kind words. We'll be time jumping again this chapter. While Eric and Sookie have been separated for a bit, I didn't want to keep them apart chapter-wise for too long. _

_Also last chapter was, to me, the angst zenith. From here on out the rest of the story will be about fixing this mess._

_Thanks as always to my wonderful beta __**Northman Maille**__ for all her hard work on this story. It's really a team effort and I could not do it without her!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…._

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The double doors to Oklahoma's Great Hall were thrown wide by two of the Queen's guards, each bowing deeply to him as he passed. The room became silent as he entered, the Vampires and Humans hurriedly parting to make a path for him as he strode towards the throne and the woman who sat there waiting to greet him…his wife.

The thought still made Eric recoil.

He barely noticed the deep, respectful bows of those he passed, instead concentrating on keeping his face carefully neutral. They had been married for ten years and in truth Freyda had not been what he'd expected.

The reports of her beauty had not been exaggerated. She was tall, standing almost six feet in height with long, silken blond hair so light in color it rivaled the paleness of her skin, and stark, greenish-blue eyes which stood out dramatically against her fair coloring. She had been born in Sweden three hundred years after his turning and her Nordic heritage was as apparent as his own.

She had been a lady of means in her Human life, and even though she continued to bear herself as such she was not spoiled, selfish or conceited as he'd expected to find her, when he was informed she had bought him in payment of his brother's debt.

She was a wise Queen, an intelligent woman, and despite her Vampiric nature, which came out when necessary, she was almost gentle in spirit. She ruled because her people loved her and, he later found out, she'd made her deal with Ocella to secure their safety. As he'd suspected Felipe's craven takeover of Louisiana and Arkansas, during Sophie-Anne's convalescence, had stirred distrust and worry in the Monarchs surrounding his newly won states. Freyda had seen an opportunity to protect what was hers and she'd taken it. It was a pragmatic move in the extreme. A move he admitted, if only to himself, he could not blame her for. Had he found _himself_ in such a position, he was sure he would have acted no differently.

Still, as he walked the length of her hall, decorated to resemble what she believed Sessrumnir, the Goddess Freya's hall in the myths of old, to look like, he could not bring himself to feel much of anything.

She was good. She was good to him, but in his heart she would never be his wife. His true wife, the woman who still filled his being, was many miles and many years gone. So far away now he only ever felt her faintly and irregularly.

Finally Eric reached the dais where the Queen sat on her throne with another seat, empty and waiting for him, beside her.

He bowed low.

"My Prince you have returned to us at last." She said, a small, genuine smile playing at the corners of her mouth.

Eric stood to his full height and nodded slightly. The past decade he had been splitting his time. Half the year he spent in Louisiana in his continuing role as Sheriff of Area Five, the other half he spent in Oklahoma as husband and Prince, helping Freyda to rule.

"I am at your Command my Queen." He intoned with a respect that, over the years, had become less and less feigned.

Freyda nodded in return and gestured regally to the seat next to her. Eric ascended the dais without further ado and the two sat, looking out at their subjects. There were cheers from the assembled crowd. For some reason, Freyda wished her people to love him and they truly seemed to.

The night wore on as it usually did when he was here. Freyda held court, presiding over the issues her Sheriffs brought before her and hearing the oaths of fealty from those new to her state. Oklahoma was small and not very powerful but Freyda had attracted many to her banner. Especially after their marriage, when Oklahoma could boast itself a safe haven from the 'aggression' of others. As Felipe's continued servant it should have offended him to know what these Vampires thought of his King, but since he had never stopped believing, at least privately, that Felipe was nothing more than murdering, usurping scum, it did not.

When court was finally disbanded for the night he stood again, holding out his hand to the Queen and escorting her out of the Hall and to her private chambers. The duty that lay before him now, their annual night together, was still his least favorite. No matter how much he'd come to respect and even like Freyda, it never failed to make him feel like a whore. A whore bought and paid for. And as a whore, he was now expected to render the services for which he'd been purchased.

Closing the doors behind them, Freyda walked up to him, her hips swaying suggestively as she began to shed the pretty clothes she'd worn. In another lifetime he might have found her captivating. Before he'd met Sookie, he would have thought everything about this woman was tailored to please him. She was beautiful, powerful, confident and witty. She was just, surprisingly kind, yet worldly. There had been many nights, during their marriage, when he had almost wished he could simply forget the few years that had gone before. But he couldn't.

When she reached him, she peered up into his eyes, her own shining with expectation and pulled his head down for a soft, longing kiss. He responded, but as always there was nothing more to it than the physical. She might touch him, she might even bring him pleasure, he knew he would bring pleasure to her, but that was it.

Almost as though she'd read his thoughts, she suddenly pulled away, sighing disappointedly.

"Eric," she said, her voice still breathy with want, even as she backed away from him, "why do you still torture yourself like this? Am I not beautiful? Have I not been a good wife to you?"

"You are beautiful and you have always been good to me Freyda." He answered, his voice flat.

She turned away from him then, but not before he saw the flash of angry frustration in her eyes. He knew it wasn't something he could explain to her, which was why he'd never tried before. The idea of a Vampire remaining faithful to another, especially another Vampire, even if it were only mentally, was absurd. Once, not so long ago, he would have laughed at the idea of any of his kind being so pitifully devoted. He would have happily killed anyone with the insolence to suggest he would indulge in such weakness. But now….

"And yet, still you persist in this…pining." In any other circumstance Eric would have found it amusing to watch a Vampire Queen stomp her pretty foot, like a small Human child getting ready to throw a temper tantrum, but now it only made him feel angry and, if he were honest, guilty.

"If you were so concerned with my willingness you should have taken it into consideration _before _you bought me." He snapped, preferring the anger to the guilt.

It was a cruel thing to say perhaps. Certainly she'd never done anything to deserve the venom with which he'd spat it at her, but it was also the truth, and it seemed to take the wind out of her sails.

"You know why I made this marriage. I never expected to care about your willingness. But I do." Freyda's eyes fell to the floor as she said the last and Eric found himself genuinely shocked by her statement. Before he could say anything though, she walked back to him, standing close enough to touch him once more, but carefully avoiding doing so. "I want you to be willing. I want you to want me as I realize I've come to want you."

"I will never feel that way for you." He answered her, his voice softer, gentler, sorry for the way things were even if he could not change them.

"You don't know that. We have a hundred years together. Anything could happen in that time. You think you will never love anyone but her, but I will show you you're wrong. I will be what you need until I am finally what you want." Her words were filled with conviction as she finally reached up to touch him, caressing his cheek with a single fingertip. "I never wanted to love you. I never thought I could love at all, but I do. I love you and one day you will love me too, you'll see. Until then, I will not ask this of you again. I don't want this with you anymore until it's what you want to. I'm willing to wait. "

With those final words she left him in her antechamber. It was light proof just the same as her bedroom and he would be safe behind the door as it locked from the inside only. He could stay the day there and no one would have to know they had not slept together.

Sitting on the wide couch, Eric stared blankly, looking almost as though he had gone into downtime. But in fact, his mind was very much awake, sifting and turning over everything that happened in the last decade. Was he a fool? Was he throwing away the chance for happiness? He wanted to believe he was not, but a part of him was almost sure he was.

Closing his eyes, needing any kind of assurance, he reached out with his blood, straining and searching. The first thing he felt was Pam, only a few hundred miles away and close enough her satisfaction was palpable.

She and Miriam were no doubt up to no good and enjoying themselves thoroughly. Pam had turned her beloved the moment the ink was dry on the paperwork. Even though he could not call himself happy in this arranged match, he was content in the happiness it had brought to his child. Miriam was a fine Vampire and she had made her Maker as joyful as Eric had once hoped to be with his own bonded child.

Pushing his blood harder he tried to reach out further, to feel the one he was longing for. She was there at the edge of his consciousness, almost like a dream one tried to hold on to after waking, even while feeling it slip through your fingers. And like those illusive dreams she eluded his grasp, drifting back into the ether before he could feel anything substantial.

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The lights strobbed annoyingly as Sookie sat beside Ocella and Alexei at their small table in the center of the club. Oct Grad was one of the trendier Vampire bars in Baden Baden, the part of Germany they found themselves wandering through. The place wasn't to her liking, reminding her a little too much of The Crypt with its industrial feel and gyrating, base heavy house music, but it belonged to the Sheriff of the Area, and right now courting his favor was important to her Master.

In the last ten years they'd made their way through Spain, France, Italy, Switzerland, Austria and finally here to Germany. Ocella was never one to mainstream, something she was happy for, but they'd had to flee more than one place because of Alexei's…condition.

She'd found out much after the fact that the offense Alexei committed in Oklahoma had been the grisly murder of one of the Queen's favorite pets. It wasn't so much that he'd killed, something they did often, but that he'd killed the wrong person. It was a pattern which continued to repeat itself, forcing them to keep moving from place to place.

Despite a few close calls Alexei had managed not be caught again. But whenever there was a gruesome, unexplained murder reported in the area they were staying, Ocella would move them before the Humans or the other Vampires there could put two and two together. As Alexei quickly approached the end of his first century as a Vampire, it had become clear, at least to Sookie, that ending him was the only solution to his issues.

It hurt her heart to think about it. She'd grown fond of him over the decade they'd spent together. In his saner moments she could almost see the good, if spoiled, boy that once lived in the body of this now unstable Vampire.

Of one thing she was certain though: Ocella would never be the one to give his child the final death. If he possessed the strength he would have done it decades ago. Instead, he made them sit here night after night, cow towing to the Baden Sheriff and keeping a near choke hold on Alexei, in hopes of being allowed to settle for a little while.

As she stared around the club, projecting the bored superiority it seemed all Humans expected, and even craved in Vampires, she spied the one thing that had broken the monotony of their stay here. He was tall, very tall, with blond hair and light blue eyes. She had seen him the very first night and, like a moth to a flame, she'd been drawn to him.

She'd also seen Ocella's look of disapproval that night, but as the years together had passed they'd come to a sort of unspoken agreement. She never pointed out her brother was an unhinged psychotic unworthy of the immortality their Master gave him, and Ocella never pointed out her feed and fucks, the ones she left alive, all bore a disturbing resemblance to his eldest child.

"Sookie." The Human said in his heavily accented English, as he approached their table, wary of her companions but compelled to be near her nonetheless.

"Becker." She answered softly, unable for a brief moment, to hide the begrudging affection she was beginning to feel.

He was a handsome man, different from the other fangbangers who courted their attention, and seemed genuinely interested in her for her and not simply for her fangs. She'd felt a passing sense of guilt more than once, during their encounters over the last month because she couldn't return those sentiments. Her interest in him was entirely about something, _someone_, else.

As Becker sat down in the seat she offered him, she found herself again unhappy about the seeming irony of her existence. She'd left her home because she'd felt the beast within her roaring to be freed. Now it had its freedom, it was happy. But Sookie longed for what she'd given up.

She'd realized she would always be incomplete, yearning for the thing she couldn't have, whether it was the freedom to indulge her bloodlust, or the need to be with her bonded. At times she felt as though she'd almost made peace with the way things had to be. At other times, like now, when she looked on his breathing doppelganger, she was right back to wishing things could have been different. Realistically though she knew her choices had been limited.

In their own way she and Ocella had great affection for each other. Their Vampire natures were kindred spirits and she had avidly learned everything he'd been eager to teach her over the years. But a decade ago when he came to inform Eric of his 'elevation', she had been nothing more than an intriguing thorn in his side. A thorn Ocella would have happily ended if she and Eric had not agreed to his compromise. Knowing him as she did now, Sookie realized compromising was something her Master almost never did, and it only reinforced the belief she'd made the right choice.

No matter how much it still hurt.

"Dance with me?" Becker asked, bringing her back from her meandering reflections.

She felt Becker following behind her as she made her way to the middle of the dance floor. As they began to move to the music Sookie found herself wrapping around him. Letting her mind drift a little she could almost convince herself he was Eric and, eager to give into her little fantasy, she began to kiss him. When her fangs dropped she felt him moan excitedly, and he pulled away to look at her, his expression painted with desire.

"I want to be yours." He whispered heatedly as he held her close.

His words jolted Sookie from her little daydream and she found herself staring at him dumbfounded. She'd never had a pet before. She'd never even considered it.

"Why would you want that?" She asked, not really thinking about the words as they tumbled out of her mouth.

"Because we're good together. Because I like you and you like me. Because I can't stop thinking about you." His English was stilted but he managed to make his point with a bluntness that was almost charming.

It made her consider his offer for a single second, but in the end she knew she couldn't. She had never wanted to get involved with any Human. She was still shocked she could even be with one sexually. She never fucked the ones she hunted,_ never_. It was only the ones who looked like….It was only the tall blonds she could even touch. But getting close to a Human would mean expectations of her, expectations she could never live up to.

"I like drinking your blood and I like fucking you, that's all. If you think this is anything more then you're mistaken." She answered coldly, pulling completely away from him.

She could see the heated denial brewing in his eyes, but before he could say anything more a loud noise cracked through the club. Turning quickly she saw the group of men bursting through the front doors, guns in hand and suddenly everything around them was chaos. Everything happening so fast there was no chance to stop it.

More shots rang out. People screamed and began to run in every direction like frightened cattle. Perhaps he did it without thinking. Perhaps he did it to prove his worthiness to be hers, but suddenly she felt Becker push her behind him. It was as though he somehow forgot she was at far less risk of being hurt than he was. In the end though, as fast as she attempted to reverse their positions, it was still too late.

When the Vampires in the club finally subdued the intruding Humans blood seemed to have coated the entire floor and bodies were strewn everywhere.

At Sookie's feet, already dead, in a pool of his own life was Becker. He'd been shot, one bullet directly through his chest. It might have been the shock, it might have been the blood, it might have been something else entirely but out of nowhere Sookie felt something.

As she stared down at the now lifeless shell of the Human who so resembled her bonded, she felt the barrier, the hard opaque wall in her mind contract. She'd always known it was there, but she'd given up trying to break through it long ago. Now, for a brief moment, it seemed to recede, flooding her head with strange images and an almost deafening roar of voices before snapping back into place.

When it snapped back, she was completely herself once more, but instead of being taken by the bloodlust such a scene would normally have induced, she was left standing there shocked, a single vision for which she could not account replaying itself over and over in her head. Only in this vision it wasn't Becker lying on the floor, bloody and dead from a bullet wound, it was Eric. Eric was lying over her terrified body, shielding her from what had been the very real danger of her mortal death.

"Sookie!" She looked up to see Ocella, pushing his way through the remaining, hysterical Humans to get to her. When he reached her he took her hand, his face betraying an urgent worry.

"Alexei's escaped." Sookie knew there was no time to waste thinking about what just happened. If Alexei, crazed with bloodlust was running loose….

Nodding her head, knowing they had to go after him, Sookie made to follow her Master. At the last moment though she turned back, looking one last time at the Human who'd died needlessly protecting her. Bending down, not sure why, she put her finger deep into the hole in his chest and pulled out the bullet, dropping it into her purse and then hurrying determinedly into the night to help find her brother.


	17. Chapter 17

_**A/N:**__ Big thanks to everyone who continues to follow this story! I'm really touched and glad that it's being enjoyed!_

_And of course thank my beta __**Northman Maille**__. She's the best beta EVER!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…._

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They'd fled the very next night to Italy. Ocella was still owed favors by Vampires with power and influence there and he'd decided it would be best to seek asylum with one of them.

It hadn't seemed so bad this time, at least Sookie had thought at first….

When they'd found Alexei hours later, after the mysterious attack on Oct Grad, he was miles from the club. Ocella tracked him to a solitary house, out in the farm fields, well away from the town. All the lights in the house were on and a car was parked in the garage. Even from a mile off though, they could tell there were no hearts beating inside.

As they got closer the smell of fresh blood assaulted their senses and, since this was a scene they'd both been privy to many times before, they knew exactly what they would find. As they crossed the threshold, without the need of an invitation, Sookie's suspicions were needlessly confirmed. Whoever had lived there, lived no more.

Her brother was in the living room, the corpse of an old man, freshly drained and deathly gray, lying on the floor. The body of his wife, not completely drained but most definitely dead, sitting beside Alexei as he flipped through the channels on the television.

"Make sure there are no others in the house." Ocella instructed her.

They worked that night, silently, as they had many times before. Sookie searched to make sure there was no one left alive while Ocella used his Maker's command to force Alexei to come with them. Then Ocella loosened a gas pipe and she'd set the house on fire.

Before they sought shelter for the day Ocella had tried, as he always did, to explain to Alexei why what he had done was wrong and Alexei had promised it would never happen again. He'd admitted, almost offhandedly, he recognized one of the Humans who'd burst into the club. He'd drained the man's wife and daughter nights earlier when Sookie had been off hunting, and he'd managed to again elude Ocella's watchful eyes.

She'd remembered Ocella's face burning with anger and hopelessness at this latest failure on his part. Whoever the man was, the attack on the club had no doubt been retribution. Whether it was general vengeance for a Vampire having murdered his family, the death of as many of them as possible being the intent, or if he'd followed Alexei specifically for the purpose of ending him, Ocella had no intention of remaining to find out.

She knew Ocella had punished Alexei for these episodes in the beginning. Having received a punishment or two from him in their time together, Sookie knew they must have been excruciating. But Ocella had stopped those punishments long before she'd come into their lives. In the end they amounted to nothing more than pointless torture. There was no reasoning with, conditioning, or controlling a mad person.

If he were a Human, Alexei would have been behind bars, in a padded cell, barely coherent from the amount of drugs he would be receiving. As a Vampire such things weren't an option. The only way to control him was to keep him silvered at all times, which she knew Ocella wouldn't do.

He'd already tried it once for an extended period of time and the result had been a worsening of Alexei's mental state rather than an improvement. Instead they'd done as they always did when Alexei lost control, they fled, leaving their few possessions behind, and pretending nothing happened.

Sookie couldn't really say she cared about the things she'd left behind. Clothes, shoes, jewelry, it was all replaceable. The only thing she had which meant anything to her was between her thumb and her index finger right now: the bullet she'd pulled from her unfortunate would-be Human.

As she looked at it, rolled it between her fingers, smelled the blood on it, she closed her eyes, replaying the memory which sprang from her shock. She'd been sitting on her bed, for three nights now, here in their rented rooms in Venice, but she barely felt the hunger scorching her throat and chiseling away at her stomach.

Instead she concentrated on the wall in her mind. She had never really known what it was before, and believed it to be impenetrable. She remembered a time or two when she'd made love to Eric, almost feeling as though she could touch it, but she'd never tried, thinking it a useless endeavor. Now she'd felt it move and she'd touched, for a brief moment, the memories which lived beyond it and heard the loud, almost deafening cacophony which must have been her telepathy, she was sure the wall wasn't meant to be there.

Squeezing the cold metal of the bullet, she thought hard about whether she wanted to try to move it again. If she could contract it or break through it, access her memories, did she really want to? What would she find behind the barrier? Would she like the person she'd once been? She'd never thought so before, but she knew that had been more about pride than anything else. She'd hated the idea she might not be wanted for who she was now, and had stubbornly refused to change, simply because others wished her to.

Now Sookie wasn't sure. If she remembered would it just make it harder to live as she was living? Being away from Eric was already a dull pain which never completely went away. It didn't matter how much she told herself that giving away her right to him, sending him to another woman, had been for the best. It had been a sacrifice, but one she'd felt had to be made. Doing so had saved Miriam and by extension Pam, whom she loved dearly. It took away the threat of Victor, keeping not just Eric from his grasp but all the Vampires Eric protected too. It had allowed her to free the dark thing inside of her which had been choking her with its bloody desires.

But it hurt. Sookie told herself more than once, as she lay in the arms of a Human chosen specifically for his resemblance to Eric, it was only for a short time. She was still young, a hundred years still felt like an eternity to her, but she knew it would be over eventually. She knew she would still be alive and, if Eric still loved her as she loved him, they could be reunited. Would remembering everything that came before change that? Would it all be that much more unbearable?

And yet that one memory which broke free, of her beautiful avenging angel shielding her with his body, and his power, made her yearn. She wanted to know their life together all the more because of it. The memory was so fleeting but she'd sensed it was some sort of turning point for her. It had been the moment when she realized he was more than she'd allowed herself to see before.

"Sookie?" A soft voice called from the doorway.

She looked up to see Alexei standing there. By his posture and his expression she knew he was well tonight. Closing the bullet in her fist she motioned for him to sit beside her.

"What are you doing?" He asked when he'd settled next to her, sitting in the center of her small bed, Indian style. At times like this he still seemed young, an eternal fourteen year old, with all the awkwardness which went with the age.

"I remembered something." She answered cautiously.

Alexei simply arched an eyebrow at her. It was a startlingly familiar expression, one she'd seen on Ocella too, and it always gave her pause. They weren't _really_ a family, Ocella, Eric, Pam, Miriam, Alexei and herself, but in these little things, like shared expressions, she wondered if they weren't like regular Human families, the children mimicking their elders without even realizing it.

"Alexei, if you could forget everything that happened to you, to your Human family, would you?" She'd often felt she was lucky not to know.

Alexei was silent for a long time, staring at his crossed legs as he struggled to give her an honest answer. She knew his family's violent end was something always close to the surface for him. Their pain and his own, a memory which became so strong and so agonizing: he could project it into the heads of others.

"No." He finally answered, his voice soft with amazement, as though he had never realized how much he longed to hold onto his anguish. "I know what's…wrong with me is probably because of all that. But I wouldn't want to forget. I still miss them, of course. I wish none of it happened. But sometimes I feel like the memory of how they loved me, of how I loved them, is maybe the only thing that keeps me from being completely…insane. If I forgot the ending then I wouldn't know how much all that came before it meant."

Sookie nodded her head, not quite knowing what to say. She'd never heard him acknowledge what was wrong with him before. She sometimes wondered if he even remembered the things he did afterwards.

To hear him speak of it like this was almost more saddening.

"Ocella is going to see the Doge in an hour. He wants us to accompany him." Alexei chuckled slightly, shaking off the morose atmosphere of the last few minutes and becoming his charming, obnoxious teenage self again. "I think he hopes you'll be able to charm the cantankerous bastard into letting us stay."

Sookie laughed a little at that. The Doge was almost as old as Ocella and apparently every bit as ill tempered. He'd heard the rumors about Alexei and was concerned, rightfully she supposed, about letting them stay. He was so concerned he was choosing to forget the only reason he held his position, as ruler of the city, at all was because of her Master.

She felt a little uneasy at the idea of them being allowed to stay resting on her. Still she had charmed Ocella into letting her live all those years ago, so she doubted she'd have trouble beguiling the Doge into giving them the right to settle.

"I'll be down in a little bit." She told him. Sookie watched as Alexei nodded, getting to his feet and heading for the door.

He turned back to her unexpectedly from the doorway.

"Sookie," he stopped for a moment, seeming to gather his courage before looking her earnestly in the eye, "if it comes to it, if I ever try to…hurt you when I'm not well…don't hesitate. You'll probably be doing us all a favor."

With that he was gone, leaving her stunned on the edge of her bed.

She knew she should be getting ready, putting on some of the nice things Ocella bought for her on their first night here, but she remained sitting instead. Opening her palm she looked at the bullet once more. If Alexei, with all his problems, knew he needed to remember his past, and was willing to own his awful memories, what did it say about her if she wouldn't?

_One try._

She would give it one try and if nothing happened, she would throw the thing away and never let it bother her again.

Closing her eyes again she brushed up against the barrier in her head. It was not breakable, she could feel that and so she didn't try to push through. Concentrating hard she willed it to move back, trying to feel the shrinking sensation she'd experienced a few nights earlier. At first nothing happened, but just as she was about to give up and forget about it, she felt it quiver.

Sookie's eyes popped open, shocked and scared all at once. Steeling herself she tried again, and again she felt the barrier respond slightly. It was like tensing a muscle. Taking a deep breath she squeezed her eyes closed to the point she knew, a human might have popped one of their blood vessels, and tried again.

This time the barrier pulled back slightly and she felt a rush of images flood her head. Sookie gasped and her unbeating heart clenched in surprising pain.

"Gran!" The image of a kindly older woman cuddling her in a rocking chair flooded her mind, and a rush of love and grief came with it.

For the next half hour she strained herself to the point of exhaustion contracting the barrier, trying to get it to recede and stay smaller. Each time it took a little more of her strength, and in her depleted state caused her pain, but finally she was able to make it stay put.

Picture after picture assaulted her. Memory after memory from her previous life passed before her eyes, memories of her family, of her friends, of her childhood. Memories filled with great pain, like the death of her parents, and others filled with great affection, like the steady love of her Gran.

Then came the memories of the last few years before her turning, and faces swam in front of her eyes, Sam, Bill, Pam, Alcide, Sophie-Anne, Amelia, Quinn, Octavia and, of course, Eric. Through all of it there was always Eric. She remembered meeting Bill, falling for him, thinking she'd found her perfect match in his cool, southern gentility and captivating silence, and the harsh pain of reality when it finally came.

She remembered meeting Eric for the first time. To her Human mind he had been so otherworldly, so frightening that first night. Now as a Vampire she understood his actions perfectly. She marveled she ever walked out of Fangtasia alive when she'd gone in like a sacrificial virgin in that white dress, covered with bloodstain flowers.

She remembered all the turmoil and the danger, all the fear and excitement of those years and through it all _his_ presence: his protection, his care and the long free fall into loving him. Even though she'd been in lust with him from the very first sight, the love took longer. It hadn't been a silly infatuation with something new and exciting like her experience of Bill. It had been a slow burning fire which, once it caught, blazed her small world and frightened her more than she could have said. In the end though, she couldn't stop herself from being consumed by all the things he made her feel. And she remembered, with an aching clarity, how she'd chosen to join him in this life. She remembered how she'd promised him an eternity together. And now she knew how it all went to hell.

She remembered the past ten years too, though they had never been hidden from her. But now, seeing her life as it had been and knowing who and what she was before, how could she ever reconcile it?

Sookie had no idea where to begin. She knew her time was running out. Ocella and Alexei would be expecting her downstairs any moment, but she couldn't help it. She sunk to her knees beside the bed and began to cry.

She'd killed. She'd done so for food, for sport and for the pure pleasure of it. She'd committed unspeakable acts in the last decade, things her Gran would never forgive her for, things her Human self found repulsive. And yet she was still a Vampire, she still understood every instinct and every compulsion which led her to do those things. They still lived inside of her, no less strong or compelling now she remembered how she had never wanted to become such a creature.

Sookie finally understood why Eric had held her so in check that first year. She knew why he had chosen to let her go to live in her bloodlust, rather than joining her. He'd been right. She never would have forgiven him for allowing her to do the things she'd done. She had no idea how she would ever begin to forgive herself for the very worst of it.

"_Sam." _

The word stuck in her throat as she remembered her very first act of violent rage. He was her friend, her very best friend and she'd slaughtered him for the pure joy of it. She'd ripped him to pieces, torn his organs from his body while he was still alive, and reveled in the sight of the light fading from his eyes. And she'd loved every minute of it, just as she'd loved every moment of every bloody hunt since then.

Sookie laughed suddenly remembering how she'd thought herself a bad Christian for the few necessary acts of violence she'd committed as a Human. She'd been very naïve.

Picking herself up off the floor she tried to wipe the blood from her face. There was no going back. She would never again be the carefree killer she'd been in the last ten years. But nor could she ever be the moral Human she'd once been either. There was no penance great enough to atone for the sins she'd committed in that time, and no cure for the darkness still living within her, even if she now understood how truly wrong many of the things she'd done were.

The two halves of herself, they wouldn't learn how to live together in the space of a single hour. She would have to tread carefully, almost like a newborn Vampire all over again, as she figured out when to be the Human and when to be the Vampire.

Standing up she moved through the room until she came to the full length mirror in the corner. Staring at her reflection, blood tears still streaked across the plains of her face, she almost felt as though there were two of her here in the room. Touching her reflection with trembling fingers she studied her face.

"I'm Sookie Stackhouse." She whispered to the person in the mirror almost seeing the Human she'd been.

"I'm Sookie Northman." She spoke again, her voice a little stronger, as she dropped her fangs, seeing the Vampire she was.

"I'm Sookie." The last was so soft no one else could have heard it.


	18. Chapter 18

_**A/N:**__ Bonus Chapter!_

_I've been a good girl and managed to keep a few chapters ahead of what I'm posting. _

_Since that's the case, and since I've been wanting to find a tangible way to say Thank You to everyone who's been so kind as to review this story, I thought I'd post an extra chapter this week._

_I'll be back with chap 19 on my regular posting day, Tuesday, and it will be the chapter where Eric and Sookie finally reunite._

_Thanks again to everyone who's been reading, reviewing, alerting and favoriting and to my wonderful beta __**Northman Maille**__, who is beyond awesome!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…but I want to play dress up with Eric and Sookie really bad!_

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

Eric felt the strangest sense of indecision niggling at the back of his mind, it had been there for days. It floated in and out at the strangest times. It was only after a night or so he realized he woke with it, dealt with it for a few restless, uncomfortable hours and then it receded in the middle of the night, only to return once more the next evening when he rose.

Most of the time it was there just at the edges of his consciousness, but it seemed to burst, on the fourth night, into a wealth of all out anguish and confusion. Eric had been sitting in Freyda's throne room, doing nothing of note, when he realized with certainty the emotions could not be his own.

Pam was too close to him for her feelings to be so opaque and indistinct. Given they talked every night, when she called to check in with him in her official capacity as 'Acting Sheriff of Area Five', he was sure she was doing well and quite happy, especially for Pam.

Therefore they could only be coming from one person.

Excusing himself in the middle of an update from one of Freyda's Sheriffs, ignoring the looks of curiosity he received from both of them, he made his way to his chamber. Once he was safely behind the locked doors of his private rooms, he pulled out his cell phone and began to scroll through his address book. Finding the number he was looking for he hit the send button and prayed silently it still worked. If it didn't, it wouldn't be the first time in the last decade such a thing had happened.

"Eric," his Maker answered on the fourth ring.

Eric let out a quiet sigh of relief before speaking.

"Master, forgive my intrusion on your evening. I know we spoke recently but I have been feeling…unsettling emotions from Sookie for the last few nights. I wished to make sure all is well."

There was silence on the other end that lasted a few tense moments before Ocella began to recount the events which had taken place in Germany, and their subsequent flight to Venice.

"…..She was unharmed, but she has been…distant for the last few nights. She refuses to leave her room nor has she fed or hunted. I have not wanted to push her though. She seemed to have become fond of one of the Humans who died in the club, perhaps this is what's bothering her. If so, I feel it best she come to terms with it on her own. Nothing I can say will show her better how unwise it is to become attached to such transitory creatures."

Ocella's words were unexpectedly hurtful. The thought of Sookie having found someone else, even after all these years, was like a lance through his gut. Still, as deeply unpleasant as such an idea was, it did not match up with the emotions he'd been feeling from her. She wasn't grieving, at least not that he could tell from so far away. Right now she was…remorseful and unhappy, but most of all confused.

"You are certain she is well though?" He asked, realizing an assurance of her physical wellbeing was all he was likely to get from his Maker. Ocella had never been one to care much for emotions, even less for the emotions of others.

"She is well, yes. Eric I must go. We are leaving to meet with San Cordano momentarily. I can hear Sookie approaching the stairs as we speak." Nodding, though he knew his Maker could not see it, Eric bid him thanks and goodnight.

He never wanted Sookie to know he kept regular tabs on her. He hadn't wanted her to feel as though he were attempting to constrict her in any way. Now, especially with the news she'd given her affections to someone else, he felt it best to keep his distance.

He tried to keep his irrational happiness at the news of the Human's demise under wraps. The fact he continued to love her as he did was his own cross to bear, he had no right to be angry with her if she moved on. And it now seemed she had completely left him behind, physically and emotionally as well.

He remembered telling her on the night, so many years ago, when they'd first seriously spoken about her joining him in this life, that her outgrowing him would be a possibility. In truth though, he'd never really expected such a thing to happen. The love they'd shared when she was Human had been too great, too all-encompassing for there to ever be another between them. But then he'd never expected any of what happened to be a possibility. It seemed after a thousand years he could still be surprised. He wondered offhandedly why the surprises never seemed to be happy ones.

Realizing he'd been away for too long already, he made his way back to the throne room to find yet another unexpected surprise waiting for him, in the form of Felipe De Castro and an entourage from Nevada. He watched as his King turned from Freyda with a delighted smile on his face and greeted him as though they were old friends. He supposed, in Felipe's mind, they might as well be. After all Eric's agreement to all this had saved him from a potential war (at least in Felipe's estimation).

"Eric, you've picked the perfect time to rejoin us!" Freyda said excitedly, rising from her throne and moving to his side gracefully. She took his arm and led him to where Felipe stood, never letting go as he made a bow to his King.

"Felipe has come with a wonderful invitation. We are invited to join him in Venice for the Doge's Carnevale celebration!"

"Yes. His Grace the Duke is an old friend of mine. I have been greatly remiss in the last few years, with all the time and work integrating Louisiana and Arkansas into my Kingdom has taken, in enjoying the pleasures of existence. But I am determined this year to go, and I thought nothing could be a greater sign of the continued joy of our alliance than for you, my most faithful servant, and our lovely Queen Freyda, my dearest ally, to join me."

Eric clamped down hard on the cynical snort that wanted to leave his lips. If Felipe was here offering such an amusement he clearly wanted something. Knowing Felipe as he did, he assumed it would be a very costly something, either in money or in lives.

"Are you not thrilled? I have not been back to Europe in many years. It will be quite diverting." Freyda said, a bright smile painting her face.

She was a good actress because even as she smiled and simpered at Felipe's offer, gushing loudly over his generosity, he felt her subtly squeeze his arm where her hand had never let go. Though he did not love her, Eric respected Freyda greatly, and over the years he had come to his own decision on things. If it came down to it, he would take his chances with Oklahoma.

"My King," Eric smiled with feigned graciousness, "You do us a great honor."

As they entertained their guests Freyda kindly offered Felipe and his people a place to rest for the day, before he made his way into Arkansas and then to Louisiana on a sort of progress through his Kingdom. It was decided he would return this way in a week's time, when he was done with his business in those states, and the Doge's private jet would meet them there to take them to Italy.

When they were ready to retire near dawn, Freyda made a great show of hugging and kissing her husband and asking him, in a breathless voice, to rest with her. Kissing her back with passion Eric accepted, and bid their guests good night, seemingly anxious to take his wife to bed.

"What do you think he wants?" Freyda asked, dropping the act when they were finally alone in her rooms, all their clothes still on.

"I'm not sure, but he definitely wants something. He wouldn't be attempting to bribe you with ostentatious vulgarity otherwise." Eric answered as he took a seat on the couch in her antechamber.

Freyda made an amused snort at his considering one of the world's oldest and most famous Christian celebrations to be trite vulgarity. But knowing how little time they had before dawn she anxiously rose from her seat and began to pace the floor, a serious expression pinching off the lovely smile lighting her face only a moment before.

"I will take only a few people with me and no one of importance." She decided. "Are my men ready?" She asked, halting her pacing to look at him directly.

Over the years, in addition to his more public duties as Prince Consort, Eric had been privately training Freyda's guards, both the Weres and Vampires. He'd made them ready to fight as a single thinking and acting body in defense of their Queen and Kingdom.

"More than ready." He answered confidently.

He was deeply proud of the work he'd done, but he knew it was a fair question. Eric was sure Felipe wanted something from Freyda, but there was always the chance he was simply trying to get them out of the state in order to take it more easily.

Freyda nodded her head as though she'd never suspected anything less and came to sit close beside him on the couch, her hand coming down tentatively on his knee.

"And have you thought anymore about the things we spoke of?" She asked, looking at him with hopeful caution in her eyes.

He wished more than anything the conversation had not taken this turn. Looking at her now he again thought about how beautiful she was, how she was a woman worth loving as much as she was worth respecting. He thought too about the conversation he'd had with Ocella just a few hours earlier. Sookie had moved on.

Even if the Human she'd become attached to was dead, it still meant she no longer loved him. If she had moved on shouldn't he? If he were to move on shouldn't it be with the woman who was already his wife, who trusted him, who was willing to throw her lot in with him against the world and all comers?

He already knew she loved him. He already knew they were compatible both in bed and out. Wouldn't this be the wise, pragmatic thing to do? Did he not _always_ pride himself on his pragmatism? Why continue to suffer as he had been when there was a chance at happiness?

"You are my wife and I will always respect you as such. You are a just Queen and I will always defend what is yours because you are worthy of what you have. You have my word for it. But I cannot love you. I cannot." His last words were whispered, but the anguish in them was as palpable as if he'd screamed them from a rooftop.

"You wish you could though, don't you?" She asked, surprising him with how easily she seemed to be able to read him.

"I do." He answered her truthfully. "I wish it more than anything."

"And you will stand by my side?" She asked softly.

"I will." He looked earnestly into her eyes as he said the last.

"That is all I can ask for now…. It's a start." Eric could feel his stomach sinking at her words.

He knew she was choosing not to accept what he said, not really, but there was nothing more he could do about it at the moment. He had been honest. Arguing the point would do nothing but pit them at odds, and right now they could not afford such self-indulgence. They needed each other.

Bending slightly she kissed his cheek softly before rising.

"The sun is nearly risen." The breath from her words caressed his cheek. "Stay the day here." She said, before kissing him once more and going to her bedroom alone.

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

The Doge's palace in Venice was every bit the fairytale Sookie could now remember seeing in pictures as a young girl. On this night the glorious white, blue and gold structure was backlit by a huge full moon, and a blaze from the inside by a hundred soft lights.

She felt her stomach clench as she remembered her Gran had always wanted to see this place, but of course had never had the money to do so. She didn't know, given all the things which led her here, if her Gran would have been proud her granddaughter had been able to realize her dream. She didn't know if her Gran would ever feel pride in her again. She imagined her, up in heaven, having turned away from Sookie in shame long ago.

They were ushered through the palace by one of the Doge's guards and, as they followed behind, Sookie couldn't help staring at all the gold and marble lining their way. It took nearly five minutes to walk through the halls of the areas the Doge had graciously opened to the public, before they finally came to the private part of the palace which was for him, his servants and guests alone.

When they reached the private throne room they found Marco Testi San Cordano, the Vampire Duke of Venice, lounging regally with several of his Human pets and his closest advisors. San Cordano was not exceptionally tall, but he was very handsome in a uniquely Italian way: porcelain skin with just a hint of the olive coloring it must have had when he was alive, rich dark chocolate eyes sparkling with cunning and intelligence, and long, thick, black hair that fell past his shoulders in luxuriant waves. Sookie could see all this easily because the moment she'd entered the room it seemed the entirety of the Doge's considerable attention focused solely on her.

"Ocella, my friend." The Doge greeted in his native Latin even as his eyes swept appraisingly up and down Sookie's body.

"Marco, old friend." Ocella answered back in Latin, making a small bow of respect.

Sookie listened in on their pleasantries, concentrating hard to understand what was said. One of the first things Ocella had done when she'd left Louisiana was to teach her his mother tongue.

He had been a Roman Patrician and Legionnaire in his Human life and he swore any child of his, naturally made or adopted, would learn the language of knowledge and enlightenment too. The world had forgotten Latin and its great importance but, ever the ancient snob he was, he would not let his beloved language die even if the Humans stupidly thought it already had.

It had been slow going and Ocella never omitted the opportunity to tell her she spoke it like a pig farmer, but after so many years she could finally say she was proficient in the aggravatingly outdated language.

When the Doge finished his greeting to Ocella, he actually rose from his throne. Descending the dais he unexpectedly took Sookie's hand, and introduced himself personally. She supposed she would finally have to thank Ocella for all his relentless tutoring, as it allowed her to surprise the Duke right back by greeting him in the same language.

"And who is this you have brought with you?" He directed his question to Ocella even as he straightened to his full height, just an inch or so taller than Sookie, and stared her directly in the eye.

"I'm Sookie." She said, choosing to answer back in Latin. "I am the child of Ocella's child Eric Northman." Dropping into a respectful curtsey she saw Ocella out of the corner of her eye. She could tell he was both proud of her for answering for herself and amused by the interaction taking place between them.

"I had no idea the Northman had acquired such good taste. When last I saw him he was still quite the loutish barbarian. Ahh, how the years have gone by." The Doge laughed obnoxiously at his own joke even as his fangs ran down just slightly

Sookie felt the hairs on the back of her neck and arms rise as she tried hard to control the anger the Duke's insult to her bonded brought out. She knew she should be more worried about his clear display of fang though. Seeing them sent a shiver through her and not in a good way. She hadn't realized this was what Ocella meant when he'd asked her to 'charm' the Doge. Perhaps naively, she'd been expected someone like her Master. Glancing at him again now, she could tell Ocella was pleased. He saw the nature of her reception as a point in their favor.

Three nights ago something like this might not have bothered her either. She'd never had a Vampire lover other than Eric, had never wanted one, but if it pleased her Master she probably would have been willing to take the Duke to her bed to ensure they were given the right to stay. Now… such a thing was unthinkable.

Still, she was a woman and she knew there was a great deal of wiggle room between flirting and sex. Perhaps all she needed to do right now was give the Doge hope in order to secure his good graces. She could figure a way around the rest later.

"Your Grace is too kind." She said, putting on a huge, innocent smile and batting her eyes.

It was clear the sight pleased him to no end and they were invited stay and 'dine' with him.

Throughout the night the Doge continued to pay Sookie considerable attention, his eyes never leaving her for more than a few moments. They were, by the end of the first hour, invited to settle in the city. By the end of the second they were welcomed to use the Doge's private Villa several streets down from the palace for as long as they should need. And by the end of the third they had been invited to be honored guests at his Grace's Carnevale celebration the next week. All in all it had been more than Ocella could have hoped for, and as they made their way back to their hotel, he was full of rare praise for her 'performance'.

When they reached their rooms, they bid Alexei good day, but when Ocella would have retired also Sookie called him back.

"I won't sleep with him." She said without preamble, her voice steely.

"Why not?" Ocella was clearly annoyed but also genuinely mystified by her statement.

Sookie stared at him for a moment, speechless. She wasn't quite sure how she should answer him, really. Nothing like this had ever been asked of her before. He knew she'd never had sex with anyone but Eric and the few Humans throughout the years she found who most closely resembled him, but she also knew sex meant nothing to Ocella. It was a means to an end, just another weapon in his arsenal to get what he desired. Given that he had so meticulously taught her everything he knew, she understood he expected her to feel the same way. It might not have been asked of her before but it was being asked of her now and he expected her to comply.

It was in their best interests to keep the Doge happy. The Doge had made it clear he would be most happy allowing them to stay if Sookie shared his bed, perhaps once, perhaps for the remainder of their stay here. Since it would get them what they wanted she should do it. That was the only thing going through his mind.

Taking a deep breath she decided blunt honesty was best. Ocella was not one to bend to the wants and desires of others, unless it had some advantage for him, but over the years she found him most willing to listen when she was truthful and to the point.

"I had a memory in Baden." She started, staring him directly in the eye, knowing her willingness to never back down was the other thing he'd always respected about her. "Earlier tonight I was able to access the rest of them. I remember everything."

Ocella's first response was a raised eyebrow. Coming very close to her he looked her over from the tip of her toes to the ends of her hair before pinning her with a gaze so intense she almost felt she should bow before its power. It took everything in her to remain standing, but she did.

"How?" He asked her, his voice quiet and calm, but tinged with displeasure nonetheless.

"There's a barrier in my head, I used to think of it as a shield. When I was Human I could put it up to block out the thoughts of others but it was always very hard for me. It wasn't until I was in my early twenties I was even strong enough to keep it up most of the time.

When Eric turned me it must have changed along with the rest of me, become stronger. It's a permanent thing now. I don't have to struggle anymore to keep it up. But it must have gone haywire during the turning because it didn't just become super strong and permanent it expanded to encompass other parts of my brain too. My telepathy and my memories have been behind it all these years.

When we were in Baden, after the attack, I looked down and saw Becker lying there dead with a bullet in him meant for me, and the shock made the barrier move back just slightly. Tonight I tried to move it again and it worked." She finished by shrugging her shoulders.

"And your telepathy?" He asked, his face suddenly changing expression to one of interest.

"I think it's stronger than it was before but I don't know for sure. I haven't tried it. When my shield fell back at the club there was a moment when I heard everything, as though the whole world was screaming at me at once. It scared me. I didn't like it. I haven't tried to pull my shields back completely again. I don't want to. The one good thing all these years has been the silence. I don't want to go back to that." Without meaning to her voice became smaller, more uncertain.

She could see the wheels in Ocella's head turning, adjusting to this new fact, seeing the many ways in which it could benefit him. She knew if she didn't say something intelligent in her own defense quickly he would attempt to force her to pull back her shields and access her ability.

"Master," she started knowing after all these years deference was best, "this is all new to me, my shields are different than they were as a Human. If I play with them much more, constrict them too quickly, or am unprepared for what could happen, I might put them back up to wide. If that happened they would again take my memories away or even worse, expand and cut off other things, in which case I could end up nothing more than a shell."

Ocella seemed to give her words genuine consideration and for a few endless minutes he was silent, looking at her, assessing her, weighing his options carefully before deciding what to do.

"Perhaps you are right. Nothing would be gained by damaging you. If you are to hone your strengthened gifts it must be done with proper guidance. Until we find such a person, don't tell anyone else this has happened, Sookie. It would put us all in danger."

Sookie nodded. She knew it was only a temporary reprieve, but she would take it all the same. Ocella was, as always, pragmatic. The risk of harm to her was greater right now than the possible gain, so for the moment he would let it rest. That might not always be the case though. And when the potential gain finally tipped his cost/benefit scale he would resurrect this conversation.

"And the Doge?"

Ocella seemed to take a moment to think before his face broke into an amused grin.

"I'll leave dealing with Marco to you, my dear. If you wish to keep him dangling on your hook, I'm more than willing to see how long you can do it. As long as we remain safe and welcome here you may play whatever game you please."

Sookie was slightly astonished to hear Ocella say such a thing. She became even more so when his hand landed heavily on her shoulder and his eyes bored into hers with what almost looked like wary affection.

"I told Eric, the night we met, that you were magnificent. I don't think I appreciated the half of it all those years ago. In many ways you have become my greatest accomplishment Sookie, as your Maker was before you. But where I had to force Eric to leave behind all he had been so he could be all he has become, you were a blank slate, devoid of the insipid Humanity which holds so many back. It is what has made you exceptional.

I wish you had not attempted this before speaking with me first. However, it is done and there is no going back. You will have to live with this part of you now. But Sookie, if you allow your returned memories and returned _Humanity_ to influence you, you will not last long in this world. You are not a Human anymore, you can no longer afford to think like one. Such stupidity will lead you to a quick and painful end." Ocella's worried voice was filled with a great deal of angry frustration but also a staggering amount of sincerity as he continued on, almost disbelieving of what he was about to say. "And your end…it would cause me much pain."

With that he left the room.

Sookie stood for a few minutes more feeling nothing but shock as the words Ocella had said sunk in. She knew, over the years, they had come to mean something to each other, but she had never guessed he felt anything so deeply, let alone for her.

Feeling the pull of the sun, Sookie returned to her room.

Looking at the bed, she felt a compulsion to kneel before it and do something she had not done in over a decade. She felt the need to pray. She'd never been a good Christian but she'd always felt she was worthy enough to be heard. Now she wasn't so sure.

She felt she had no right to ask for forgiveness, especially since she couldn't guarantee that murder and bloodshed would never again happen at her hands, or if they did she would not enjoy them. She felt in desperate need of guidance over so many things: what to do about the Duke, what to do about her returned memories, what to do about her life, but felt the advice she needed was not the kind God gave out.

In the end she simply laid down and waited for dawn trying desperately to quell the feeling of crushing solitude which seemed to envelope her. There was no Gran and no Pam to give her honest, sage advice. There was no God to grant her peace and serenity. There was no Eric to love her unconditionally and shore her up with his thousand years of strength and confidence. Now there was not even Ocella to whisper cunning schemes in her ears.

For the first time in her existence, alive or undead, she realized she was completely alone.


	19. Chapter 19

_**A/N:**__ Thank you all so much, as always, to those who continue to read this story, favorite it, put it on alert, and of course review!_

_And thank you to my wonderful beta, __**Northman Maille**__!_

_Should we get these two back together now?_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…._

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As the week went by Sookie became more and more concerned about the Duke.

Ocella, feeling it would unnecessarily offend the Doge if they did not, moved them from their rented rooms into his Grace's villa. Each night she woke to find the common rooms of the grand house overflowing with fresh roses of every kind: violet for love at first sight, light pink for passion, burgundy for unconscious beauty and many others Sookie wasn't sure the exact meaning of, but was fairly certain translated most simply into 'I want to fuck you'.

In addition to the veritable greenhouse he'd created for her, the Doge himself graced them with his presence for at least part of every night, attempting to get her alone as she tried to thwart his efforts by asking Ocella or himself to recount stories of the adventures they'd shared during their, seemingly, endless centuries on Earth.

Ocella was only too happy to oblige her, finding her game of cat and mouse with the Duke infinitely amusing. Sookie had started to wonder, if she lived as long as him, would she also begin to find such intense entertainment in the discomfort of others, or was Ocella simply a sadist of a higher order than she'd previously surmised?

Ocella had just finished recounting to them his adventures on campaign in Gaul with Julius Caesar when the Doge leaned into to Sookie, whispering conspiratorially into her ear.

"I look forward to dancing with you at the celebration, my dear. I have no doubt you will be the most bewitching creature there. I admit I've been so distracted by such imaginings I've been quite remiss in carrying out my duties." He laughed gratingly. "I expect you will save every dance for me." He looked at her now with a gaze that was probably meant to be smoldering but she only found cloying and obnoxious.

He was a handsome man, it was undeniable, but he came on far too strong. It was saying a great deal, she thought, for a woman who'd succumbed more than happily (eventually) to the intense charms of Eric Northman, to think any man's approach _too _aggressive. It didn't help that she truly had no idea why he'd formed such an intense attraction to her so quickly. She was quite sure he was not lacking in woman willing to throw themselves at his feet and give him anything he desired, no matter how strange or depraved.

She supposed all these ancient men had one thing in common, they were so unused to being refused, they became addicted to the chase, eager and desperate to have anything or anyone who dared deny them. Except Eric had done it with dignity and real charm: underneath his manwhore exterior there was a man _worth _yielding to, a person worth loving.

The Doge merely struck her as a pretty brat: spoiled, petty and bored with his own 'rich and powerful'-ness. The kind of person who sucked (both literally and figuratively) the luster out of whatever initially attracted him and then discarded the thing when it no longer shone brightly. She had no doubt as a child he'd been the type who wanted a toy when it was denied him, but then purposely broke it once it was given to him.

"You Grace pays me too much kindness." She simpered, even as her stomach turned slightly, the blood she'd consumed feeling as though it had rotted suddenly. "Unfortunately, I don't think I'll even be able to attend."

She saw the Duke's eyes go dark with anger. Instantly upset she was daring to rebuff him.

"Why ever not? My Carnevale celebration is a famous affair. Important people all over the world beg me for an invitation each year!" He snapped petulantly, not even bothering to hide the abrupt extremeness of his displeasure.

"Your Grace is mistaken." Sookie said, as she held up her hands and attempted to smile prettily, as though it were all simply beyond her power. "I didn't say I did not want to attend, it's just that…well you men have only to put on a tux and a handsome mask. I would have to have a dress, a period costume. That's not something a girl can come by in a week's time, after all. I mean no offense your Grace, it's just not possible."

With her words the Duke broke out laughing and again sidled close to her. Sookie had to use all of her hard won strength not to flinch away when his hand came up to play with a strand of her hair.

"Is that all? How pleasantly unspoiled you are Mia Cara." His pet name for her, which she'd been given on their second night, made her shudder internally. "And how many times have I told you, you must call me Marco."

Sookie tried hard not to scowl as she heard Ocella's soft chuckle from across the drawing room, where he stood seemingly entranced by a particular vase of flowers. She hated how much pleasure he was taking in watching her squirm, but then she'd never been under the delusion he was anything close to a good person. She especially hated how it had never mattered to her before. She'd always liked him anyway…until now!

The next evening the Doge appeared again for his nightly visit, only this time he had five elderly women in tow, tape measures and fabric swatches in hand. Sookie was all but seething as they took her into the main drawing room, stood her up on a stool, like a doll to be dressed up and played with, and began stripping her down to her underwear.

Her arms where pulled straight, her legs and waist wrapped in measuring tape and her coloring tested against different shades and fabric textures. All of it as the Duke hungrily drank in her mostly naked form, imperiously giving his opinion on what was best. It took forever but, mercifully, when it was over there was little time for anything else.

The night of Carnevale Sookie woke to find a lady's maid waiting outside her locked resting room door with three other of the Doge's female servants behind her carrying bags and boxes. Sookie could only imagine Ocella, who had risen some time ago, had already seen the women and was no doubt having a good laugh over his 'breakfast'.

When she ushered the women in, they began to bustle about, unpacking everything and ordering it all for what would probably be the arduous task of getting her into it. Despite herself, when Sookie finally saw the dress the Doge had made for her, she couldn't help the one moment of girlish breathlessness which overcame her.

For a single second she was awed enough to forget the man who'd given this to her. One who would no doubt be adding the time and cost of this present to the perceived debt she owed him. The one he expected her to pay with her body.

Still it was beautiful, more beautiful than anything she'd ever seen, certainly more beautiful than anything she'd ever owned. The dress itself was made of midnight blue satin, the low bodice, ends of the flowing sleeves and the outer skirt hem trimmed in what appeared to be handmade black lace. The underskirt and panels at the side of the bodice where made of silver brocade and they shone beguilingly in the soft light of her room. She had no doubt they would practically gleam in the light of the old style gas lamps and candelabras which would illuminate the palace tonight.

Her mask, the most important accessory of the night, was equally amazing. It was dainty and small, covering just her eyes with more silver brocade, trimmed with black lace ruffles that would touch her forehead and brush her nose. However, it was only deceptively fragile, because it was strong enough to hold up an enormous black plume attached to the right side. The tips of the black feather dipped in some kind of sparkling blue and silver colored paint.

To accent this amazing creation the Duke had sent her a necklace and bracelet made of platinum and completely encrusted with huge onyx jewels. To match there was a pair of heels in blue and silver, again decorated with onyx stones on each of the buckles, which completed the costume's eighteenth century feel.

It was all too much, and Sookie felt the weight of that which would be expected in return squelching her momentary enjoyment of the otherwise exquisite creation. Like a prisoner to the block she allowed the women to dress her hair in large curls piled high on her head, secured by diamond and onyx combs.

She stood like stone, never more grateful for her Vampiric ability to appear still as a statue, while they trussed her into a stiff corset. It pinched her at the middle to make her already generous bust and hips appear more exaggeratedly curvaceous. Then they buckled her into the cage like contraption that went under her skirts to make the dress jut out at her sides at ridiculous proportions.

She paid little attention as they then placed the skirts over her head, lacing them at the back. In authentic fashion for the period, the women proceeded to pin the bodice of the dress and the sleeves onto her corset, molding the beautiful fabric to her body. Finally they laced the back of that also and added the panel of black silk that covered the ties and fell to the floor in one elegant, train-like drape.

Since her face would be covered, they didn't bother with makeup beyond staining her lips with a soft pink gloss and then put on her mask, carefully arranging it on her face and making sure to tie the long black satin ribbons which held it in place into an ornate bow below her styled curls.

When she was done, Sookie couldn't even say she recognized herself. The image that stared back from the mirror was not the image of Sookie Stackhouse, or even the image of Sookie Northman. It was the image of someone completely foreign to her, the image of an exotic courtesan, a woman who was clearly the exalted mistress of a rich and powerful man.

She hated every inch of this person.

She would NOT be that woman, the weak and simpering plaything of an arrogant and self-assured prig. Ocella be damned and Alexei right with him. She cared for them both greatly, but not enough to sacrifice her dignity and her self-worth. She knew if it came to it, she would simply leave.

She'd been a Vampire for nearly eleven years. She was in control of her desires and compulsions enough to take care of herself now. _When_ she refused the Duke,_ if_ Ocella could not get over it, _then_ she would leave. Given that she already felt so lost and alone, it would make no difference to her if she were physically so as well.

She had a fleeting moment when she had to hold herself back from simply ripping the dress from her body, and sending the fragments of destroyed fabric back to the Doge as a clear message of her rejection. But doing so would surely incur his wrath and would most certainly get them forcibly ejected from his Dukedom.

While she was upset with Ocella for not stepping in, she wasn't angry enough to forget the past ten years and everything they'd been through together, everything he'd taught her and all the times he'd protected her. It was the reason she hadn't rejected the Doge outright on their first night, and it was the reason she continued to put him off but never directly spurned him. She owed Ocella too much to ruin outright this safe haven for him and Alexei.

She wondered if this wasn't the first of many times to come when her Human side would war with her Vampire side. Was this what Ocella meant when he said thinking like a Human would get her quickly killed? Refusing a man like San Cordano wouldn't just mean getting kicked out. There were any number of other ways a man with his power could make her existence miserable.

Yet, even when she'd been simply a Vampire, devoid of all her memories and morals, sex had never been meaningless to her. She'd never engaged in it purely for pleasure or simply for relief. Even when she'd left Eric, she'd only picked men like him so she could indulge, if just for a few hours, in the fantasy of still being with the man she loved. So perhaps this wasn't a matter of Human versus Vampire.

Still pinning down the nature of her dilemma did nothing to help her solve it.

She would go tonight, she would dance happily and enjoy herself thoroughly and when the time came she would politely but firmly tell the Duke where he could stick it. He'd never come out and said he wanted to sleep with her and she'd never agreed or even hinted she would.

She'd been as polite, gracious, and accommodating as she would have been to anyone in his position. What he'd given he gave freely and she was within bounds to remind him that it was to his _old friend_ and his _old friend's_ progeny he'd done so; an _old friend_ to whom he owed his life several times over, and his power and wealth at least once. If he gave all this in more than gratitude and recompense for the things Ocella had already done for him…that was his problem.

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As they pushed through the reveling throngs in the narrow streets, Sookie could almost taste the crazed excitement of the crowds and the atmosphere seemed to get more and more fevered as they approached the palace.

Tonight all the lights in the square were lit. The Palace was a blaze with a billion tiny, tinkling fairy lights both on the building and wrapped around every lamp post, and the Doge's people were hard at work sorting the invited from the merely hopeful.

When they approached the doors they were picked out almost immediately by the Doge's Major Domo. He sighed in relief when he spotted them and Sookie had no doubt he'd been sent out specifically to await their arrival.

As they were once again ushered through the Palace, Sookie couldn't help noticing the enormous structure was packed to near bursting with people: Vampires, Humans and others who she couldn't quite place, but could clearly tell where not among the mortal.

They passed three packed ballrooms, where people danced and drank until they reached the grand room where the Doge was hosting only his most important guests.

When they walked through the gilded double doors, Marco abruptly ended his conversation with a group of lovely looking women to glide to their side. Without a word he took Sookie's arm from Ocella's grasp and led all three of them to the dais.

"My friends! You've arrived." He said, just loud enough to be heard over the music. "Thank goodness," he laughed, "I'm bored to the point of murder already!" He said those last words directly into Sookie's eyes and once again she felt herself holding on hard to prevent an instinctive shudder.

They watched the revel from their elevated position for several minutes as Marco and Ocella made polite chit chat, but when the dance ended he turned to Sookie once more and pinned her with a forceful gaze.

"I intend to claim my dances now and when they are done, we will discuss your living arrangements." His voice was imperious and sure. "Ocella and Alexei are free to continue using my villa, but you will move you're things here, tonight. I have thoroughly enjoyed our game Mia Cara, but when you get to be as old as I am, you become impatient quickly. I am ready to move on to more…gratifying sport."

She hadn't expected him to be so forthright in front of so many, but Sookie knew she'd run out of time. If he wished to be rejected so publically, so be it. Before she could open her mouth to say anything though, the double doors to the ballroom opened again and Sookie was hit by a wave of happiness and joy so intense and unexpected it nearly brought her to her knees.

It was almost as though her eyes and her brain were suddenly functioning independently of each other. She knew what she saw, yet she couldn't force her mind to make sense of the images.

She watched him, walking with his companions to the dais, utterly entranced. All those years, all those men chosen because of their resemblance to_ him_, they had all been insipid counterfeits. Seeing him as he was now, dressed in a suit which was tailored to highlight every perfect plane of his tall, hard body, his long hair cascading feely halfway down his back, only proved there could never truly be another like him.

She felt her body heating up at the mere nearness of him and couldn't quite believe he was actually here with her. Maybe years in Alexei's company had finally driven her mad as well. It was the only explanation she could come up with for how he could be suddenly here, inhabiting the same room as her, filling it with his presence until no one else mattered.

When Sookie's gaze finally, almost instinctively, met his, she found his eyes burning into her and in that moment the bond, so long stretched to its limits, flared. Their bloods became nearly ecstatic to be reunited, the part of him that lived in her singing as it zipped through her veins. Underneath the joy though was a wealth of hurt and pain and longing. It consumed her so thoroughly that she almost missed what was going on around her.

The smaller man who accompanied him, with short, dark hair and a red silk lined cape over his tuxedo, whom she'd barely even noticed, took that moment to remove his mask with a flourishing gesture and bowed low to the Duke.

"Felipe!" The Duke said, dropping her hand to walk down the dais and clap King De Castro on the back.

The two Vampires hugged and kissed each other's cheeks, in a very un-Vampire like show of affection, before the Duke turned to greet the female who rounded out their party. She was…there were no words Sookie could use to describe her actually. Anything Sookie could think of would have been trite and clichéd and this woman was anything but trite. When Felipe introduced her as Freyda the Queen of Oklahoma, Sookie's heart seemed to rip right down the center.

Her elegant gown was made in the same style as Sookie's, in a sea foam green color, with white silk paneling and underskirts, all shot through with gold embroidery. The dress was, no doubt, painstakingly designed to underscore her distinctively startling features, the pale white of her skin and fair hair and the unique color of her eyes, which shone out more brilliantly than any jewels she could have put on. She'd finished her gown with ropes and ropes of pearls, both around her neck and wrists and twisted into her hair.

To see this woman, to know who she was, made Sookie nearly ill with jealousy. How could she have ever been such a fool as to send him off to a creature like this? How could she ever compete with such beauty? She wondered then if he'd even thought of her in the years they'd been separated. She'd felt a few times as if he was searching for her through their bond, but looking at his wife, she began to think perhaps that had been nothing more than wishful thinking.

"Who knew I would be hosting a family reunion tonight?" Marco said in high spirits, breaking into her anguished revere, as he gestured for Ocella to join him.

Taking his cue, Ocella descended the dais to greet his eldest child and receive Eric's respect. Alexei followed next, on his best behavior, to greet his elder brother with a deference that was almost equal to that which Eric had showed Ocella, and then they all seemed to turn their eyes on her.

Taking a single, shallow breath for courage, Sookie stepped carefully down from the dais and came to stand between Marco and Ocella. Curtseying deeply, she whispered an almost inaudible hello to Eric, before dipping another less effusive curtsey to Freyda and Felipe at once.

When she rose again she found all eyes still focused on her. Marco stared at her with open desire, Ocella with guarded pride, Felipe seemed to barely notice her at all, and Freyda appeared to be appraising her with something like distaste.

It all paled in comparison to the indecipherable expression on Eric's face. Even the bond, awash with so many emotions skittering by so fast, was no help at all in figuring out what he might be thinking. It scared her. She felt so much, what if he felt nothing at all beyond shock at seeing her, or nostalgia for what they once had?

"Come, this is cause for celebration. Northman, take your Queen and join your lovely child and I for a dance." The anger and jealousy shooting through Sookie at the Duke's words was palpable, so palpable she suddenly realized it was impossible for all of it to be her own.

It made no sense to her though, because despite his racing emotions Eric seemed to take Freyda's hand quite tenderly and even smiled as he led her out to the floor, falling into step behind her and the Duke.

The musicians struck up a merry waltz and the crowd, interested to see the spectacle, chose to ring the dance floor instead of joining in, ensuring they could watch the two couples turn about the floor.

As they circled each other Sookie tried to keep her eyes locked on her partner. It was such a little thing, to pay attention to the man who so clearly wanted her attentions, but it felt as if it was the hardest thing she'd ever done. When she chanced once to glance over at Eric and Freyda though, she felt that ripping sensation in her chest all over again and knew she couldn't look a second time. She couldn't stand to see him smiling dotingly down on his wife as though Freyda were the only thing of worth in the world, not when he had promised her all those years ago he would never love anyone but her!

The memory of the night before he'd made her taunted her mercilessly. She could hear herself telling him she could not bear to let him turn her if it would mean having him for only a short time and then watching him with others, perhaps one day falling in love with one of them. In return she heard him promise so earnestly he would never do such a thing.

Now she was almost sure she was seeing exactly that, and she felt all the affection and loyalty she'd cultivated for Ocella over the years begin to rot within her. It was_ his_ fault they'd been forced to part and, despite the regard she'd come to have for him, she'd never stopped blaming him for it. But if Eric, in his anguish at what he must have perceived as her betrayal, had closed his heart to her and given it to another…. She didn't know if she could put her pain aside enough to ever again feel anything but hate for their Master.

After the first dance the other guests joined them on the floor and she lost sight of Eric and Freyda. She tried her hardest to concentrate on the Duke, ignoring for now that every word she said and every expression she made merely led him on further. Perhaps it was for the best. Perhaps she should give in to him. Maybe it was time to truly move on.

Sookie had never been so glad to hear the loud crack ringing through the ballroom at the stroke of midnight. The musicians stopped mid song and the crowd cheered with unrestrained delight, as the open doors that led to the balcony were lit by the spectacle of fireworks outside. The crowd, almost as one, rushed out to see the beautiful lights burst over the water, and Sookie found herself separated from Marco but swept out with the others all the same.

Spoiled and bored though he might be, the Doge of Venice knew how to make an evening memorable and, as the fireworks lit the sky, almost as bright as the daylight Sookie could now remember, she felt a kind of cold resolve enveloping her. She had almost decided to abandon her plans and give into Marco when another feeling flushed the determination from her, like ice water racing through her veins.

It was chilling and frightening for all of a moment before it turned hot, burning her, but not painfully. She'd only experienced something like this once, the night Ocella came to Fangtasia, but it was not the same. It was not Ocella's call at all and once the initial shock of it wore off, it seemed to compel her softly, yearningly to follow its song.

Pushing through the crowd, back into the ballroom she followed the call of her blood through the now, startlingly empty palace. She walked as fast as her gown would permit through the vacant halls, past the public parts of the building and up a winding staircase into the Doge's private residence. Her feet compelling her to move faster and faster the closer she got to her mysterious destination. She had no idea where she was going and yet she knew every step she should take.

When she finally reached the place she knew she should be, she found herself standing before two huge gilded doors. They would have been almost impossible for a Human to open but she pulled them wide with barely any effort.

The room, a grand bedroom with an enormous curtained state bed as its center piece, was dark, not having been meant for use on this night and seemingly empty. But standing just at the threshold of the balcony, staring off into the distance at the fireworks brightening the sky every few seconds was her Maker, her bonded, her love.

Closing the doors behind her, she watched as he turned slowly, his eyes, clear to her even in the darkness, a maelstrom of deep, powerful emotions.


	20. Chapter 20

_**A/N:**__ I just want to wholeheartedly thank everyone who's been following this story: reviewing, alerting and favoriting. I was blown away last chapter and I can't find the words to express my gratitude!_

_And I have to, always and forever, bow at the alter of my beta __**Northman Maille's**__, awesomeness! I can never tell her properly how much I adore her and how lucky I am to have her!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…._

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If it had not been for the fireworks which lit the sky every few seconds, brightening the room almost rhythmically, Sookie would have felt as though time itself had frozen. She stood rooted to the floor in front of the doors, Eric likewise to the threshold of the balcony. The entirety of the vast bedroom stood, like a yawning chasm, between them, neither sure they should try to bridge it.

Sookie knew Eric called her there deliberately and yet she couldn't be sure why. She wanted with all her heart to believe that seeing her again had been every bit as poignant for him as it was for her. That it was not enough for him to stare at her from across a crowded room when they were finally so close after so long. But again her doubts took her.

For all that flowed through the bond, Sookie could not get the picture of Eric smiling down at Freyda out of her mind. It wasn't as though she'd expected him to be physically faithful over the years. She'd known what would be expected of him as royal consort and she'd never deluded herself he wouldn't feed. Nor did she think, even in her most selfish moments, he should remain saintly while she lived as the devil's most ardent servant.

She begrudged him none of it. It was plain and simple cowardice that kept her petrified to the floor. Fear he had withdrawn his heart from her and instead given it to the beautiful woman downstairs.

Still, he'd called her and even if she could have refused the compulsion in her blood, she would have come. She'd missed him so much over the years, more than she'd ever thought possible, and now he was here. She wouldn't give up this unexpected opportunity to be alone with him for anything, even for a few minutes, even from across the length of this room.

Sookie could not tell how long they'd been standing there. Each lost in their own thoughts, struggling with their own fears and hopes, simply staring at each other. But at length Eric finally broke the silence.

"I knew you were in the city." He started slowly, deliberately, as though measuring every word before letting it leave his mouth. "I should have guessed you would be here tonight and yet…." He trailed off as he finally broke the lock they had on each other's eyes to take in every inch of her, from the top of her intricately styled curls to the tips of her slippered feet. "You look well." He breathed. "Are you…happy?"

"I am." Sookie answered, joy shooting through her to be speaking to him again, even as a small part of her hated the awkwardness between them. It was as though they were strangers and not two people who'd once fought and bled and loved together. "Ocella has been good to me."

Eric response was a nod of his head, as though he'd expected her reply but still needed to hear it directly from her lips.

"And you?" She forced herself to ask, though she still feared the answer. "You're happy with….things?"

His expression was unreadable and their bond again seemed to vibrate with so many different feelings Sookie couldn't sort through them all quickly enough. She was almost sure resignation was the emotion that swam past the strongest though.

"I am content." He answered her, carefully.

"And Pam?" Sookie hurried on, shifting their conversation before she could feel the strength of his contentment.

Eric laughed then. It was a soft sound, but genuine.

"She is very well. She and Miriam are quite happy, though she misses you. She misses you greatly." The way he spoke almost led Sookie to believe it wasn't just Pam who missed her, and again she felt a little bubble of joy float up within her.

"I'm glad. I miss her too."

If Eric felt her words were for more than Pam alone he kept it to himself and they stood there for another long moment saying nothing, simply drinking each other in. Their bond was so happy and it was, in its own way, the most beautiful moment Sookie had ever experienced, but for the aching knowledge it couldn't last.

When the last of the fireworks died in the sky and darkness completely enveloped the room, Sookie knew the moment of parting was almost upon them. The despondency which suddenly took her, knowing she might not see him again for a long, long time, seemed to unchain something within her. The floor no longer held her captive, the fear no longer kept her silent. For a single moment she was completely free and she rushed to Eric, intent on throwing herself into his arms.

All she could think of was how good it would feel to hold him again, to feel the solid, muscled length of his body surrounding hers. How magnificent it would be to breathe in his intoxicating scent from its source. How much she longed to drink in his kisses and his life once more. She wanted to tell him she loved him. She wanted to tell him she remembered. She wanted to beg him to forget everything and everyone and take her away.

At the last minute, sense and reason reclaimed their grip on her.

He was married and even though marriage didn't mean the same thing to a Vampire as it would to a Human, the truth of what was expected of him still remained. He might not owe Freyda fidelity, but he did owe her another ninety years of his existence. He owed her the first place in his life and the respect and honor a husband gave a wife, and a subject gave a Queen. To tell him everything, if indeed he still cared, would only make the doing of his duties harder, and she had no right to make their sacrifice more difficult for him

No, it was best in every way if she bore this cross alone. Maybe…maybe this suffering might even begin to atone for so many of the sins she'd committed.

Trying desperately to cover her near loss of control Sookie went to her knees in front of Eric, falling back on all Ocella taught her, while she tried to govern her emotions.

"Master." She intoned taking his hand and kissing it once, allowing herself one small moment of physical connection before dropping his hand and forcing herself to lock away her foolish desires. "Thank you...for still caring for me. I was afraid you would never want to see me again." Sookie's words were all but choked by the end.

Shutting her eyes to hold back tears, she never saw Eric close the final small gap between them.

Bending down he took her upper arms, marveling, after all these years apart, at how his large hands completely surrounded her small limbs. Her presence, even when she'd been absent from him, always filled his heart and mind to such an extent he often forgot how tiny she was.

As Eric gently lifted her back to her feet, Sookie raised her head once more, her eyes tinged red with unshed tears. Everything in him wanted to pull her close, to comfort her. But he knew he should no longer allow himself to feel these things. Even if her Human had perished, the truth he'd existed at all, a man she'd grieved for, cared for, possibly been in love with, still stood between them.

She'd given her love to another, maybe he hadn't even been the first. All the years he'd longed for her, all these years his heart had clung to her…all for nothing. He should want to punish her. He should want to rid himself of her. When he'd seen the Duke practically salivating over her in the ballroom, the evidence of his desire straining his pants for all to see, Eric had experienced a moment of such deep anguish he was sure only her final death would relieve his pain.

But in the end he had to see her. He needed to know she was well, that she was happy in this life she'd chosen. If she was, then he would try to be happy for her and try to let her go…truly let her go.

"You have no need to thank me Sookie." He chose his next words carefully. She might feel all there was to feel inside of him, but it didn't mean he had to further debase himself with pathetic words of longing. "I will always…care for you. You are my child."

He thought he saw a flash pain cross her face. It was gone almost as soon as it came though, and despite the burst of nearly overwhelming and confusing emotions he'd felt from her earlier, all he got from her now was a solid wall of determination. It felt much the same as the night she'd implored him to sign away their marriage. He could sense there was more beneath the surface, but she'd pushed it so far down he couldn't get a good enough hold on the other emotions to decipher them.

He wanted to hope it meant that perhaps she did still care for him as more than her Maker. But he couldn't risk it. With all he already knew to be true it would be to humiliating, to emasculating, to again be the one clinging while she pulled and wrenched herself away.

"We should be getting back." He told her, his voice suddenly devoid of any emotion.

He watched as Sookie's face took on an expression of stoicism, and she nodded her head in resignation as she turned to look at the doors.

"Yes, I'm sure the Doge is looking for me and Freyda must be looking for you too."

Despite the wisdom of his inner musings Eric couldn't help the bitterness lacing his voice.

"Yes, it seems the Doge is quite attached to you." His words were almost a growl and they caused Sookie's head to snap back, her eyes locking with his once more.

"It's not like that." She reassured him, though she knew she shouldn't. "Well, it is like that, but I don't want it to be. I don't want him, but what can I do? Ocella wishes us to stay here. He needs us to, Alexei did something awful again, and he could be in danger if we don't have someone strong to protect us. Marco has made it clear what the price of his protection is." Sookie looked at Eric helplessly.

He could tell she hated the mere thought of trading herself like this and it brought him small comfort. Even if she no longer loved him, at least he would not have to bear the thought of sharing the depth of her affections with that insect.

"I know you will find a way." He chose to reassure her. "I'm sure you can dangle the Duke for as long as you need. You don't remember it, but you kept me at bay for a very long time." The words were said with something akin to amusement, but Eric feared the air of wistfulness behind them was all too apparent.

The memory of those years swam up before Sookie and she remembered each of the times she'd put Eric off so efficiently. It was true, if she could 'dangle' Eric, as he'd put it, then she could do the same to Marco, though again she wasn't really sure there was a reason to now. She laughed with a good deal of her own bitterness at all of it: her disdain for the Duke, her past stupidity with Eric, her sadness over the mess that should have been their happily ever after.

"I was an idiot," she snorted, "If I had been a smarter girl I would have pretended to let you glamour me the night we met." She'd been about to turn away, embarrassed at the regret she'd so weakly revealed when she felt Eric's hand, like steel banded around her upper arm, pulling her back, _hauling_ her flush against his chest.

Taking both her shoulders in his grip, Eric's eyes seemed to burn through her once again. This time though, the feeling was altogether different. It felt as though he were trying to use their bond to push his way into her head, to sift through her very soul for something hidden there. At first she didn't understand what could have caused this sudden, complete change in his demeanor.

Then realization struck her like a lightning bolt.

The night after she'd first risen Vampire, he'd told her everything he could about their lives together. He told her about everything but her telepathy, for fear of unsettling her even more than she'd already been. Because he hadn't told her about her telepathy he'd left out that single moment in Fangtasia when he'd tried to compel her from Bill's side, and how she'd been immune to such power. In her stubbornness to not remember they'd rarely, if ever, talked about the past they'd shared when she was a Human again, and never in detail. His memory every bit as finely tuned as hers, Eric must have realized all this almost the moment it was out of her mouth.

"How…how can you know that? I never…. Do you… _you remember_!" He struggled. His voice trembled with emotion and disbelief as he again tried to use their bond to cut through the fabric of her being.

Trying to pull away from him, Sookie threw up her hands, pushing against the solid mass of Eric's chest. She desperately fought for physical space even as his blood obliterated every single molecule that stood between their souls.

She wanted to damn herself. She wanted to deny everything, for his own good, but she knew it was hopeless now. For all her struggling, in the end she'd succumbed to her weakness. In her heart she'd wanted him to know, needed him to know, and her heart had betrayed the better judgment of her mind.

"I!…." She stopped struggling. What use was it to try and hide from him now? "Yes." She said.

She hadn't known what to expect from him, but it wasn't the quick release of her shoulders. Nor was it the sauntering out onto the open balcony, pushing a hand through his hair with enough force half his scalp would have been taken with it, had he been Human.

This time, it was Sookie who deeply probed their bond, pushing past Eric's initial attempt to resist her and searching within him. If she'd only been his child, he could have repelled her with ease, but she was his bonded as well and nothing could keep her out of his blood or body. Not time, not distance, not even the considerable force of his will. What Sookie found there was an agony she couldn't account for. His pain was so absolute. He seemed to be drowning in it, flailing around blindly for his strength and calm, as a Human might seek oxygen.

Before she could ask him, knowing he had already laid his anguish bare to her whether he wanted to or not, he rounded on her. When he looked at her this time, his face was somewhere between anger and grief.

"I spoke to Ocella just a few nights ago." He began, his words deceptively steady. "He told me about your Human who died. Ocella said you were…attached to him. If you remember everything," he spat those words at her with such venom she recoiled a step even though there was so much space between them already, "then how could you give yourself to another like that?"

His words shocked her, and it took a moment to understand who he was even talking about. Even when she realized it was Becker, she couldn't figure out why he seemed so angry. Surely he'd never been under the delusion that one as young as she was could master their sexual desire enough to be celibate for ten years?

No, Eric would never expect that. It must have been something else then.

Looking in his eyes, seeing his hurt, feeling him and the agonizing anger, no not anger, not really…betrayal, he was being overwhelmed by though their bond she suddenly guessed the truth. He thought she'd fallen in love with another! He actually thought, or Ocella had led him to believe, she'd completely abandoned him, past the sacrifice they'd made, past the physical separation.

"Did Ocella tell you why I chose him? Did he tell you why I was attached to him? It's the same reason I've been attached to a handful of other Human men in the last decade." Sookie took one deep, long breath to shore up her courage and then she walked out onto the balcony towards Eric, willing him to look at her and see the truth in her words. "He was a nice man, good even, but I couldn't have cared less about his goodness or his niceness! I chose him because he was tall and blond and blue eyed. I choose him because if I only half opened my eyes, in the dark of any of the rooms I took him in, I could pretend for just a little while he was you.

I know I was the one who left and you were the one left behind. I know I told you I needed something you wouldn't give. And all these years, I've indulged my bloodlust. I did all the things you would never let me do and I loved all them. God help me I did. But I_ never_ gave my heart, my mind, or what little soul I might have left to anyone. I couldn't, they've always belonged to_ you_. Even without a single memory of all we shared, of how much we loved, I could never see anyone but you!"

Eric stood stunned as he listened to Sookie. Her eyes were filled with sincerity and pain, their bond flooded with the proof of her honesty. Ocella had misled him, whether by accident or on purpose he could not know, but there was no denying Sookie spoke the truth.

She loved him. She'd taken others, but only to feel closer to him. It was twisted in its own special way, but no worse than what he did once each year. No worse than when he would close his eyes while moving above his 'wife' and try to smell Sookie's smell around him, taste Sookie's taste, convince himself it was Sookie, and no one else, who shouted his name in ecstasy.

She loved him and she remembered. She remembered everything. Before him now, like a dream on this other worldly night, were both his Sookies, made one once more and loving him completely. It was a blessing and a punishment all at once.

"And Freyda?" Sookie's voice interrupted his shock, pain, as she said the other woman's name, dripping from her lips. "I saw the way you looked at her. I saw the way you held her. Can you tell me, it makes any difference what I've done or who I've done it with?"

Sookie watched as a single red tear coursed its way down Eric's cheek, staining his face beautifully, as an all engulfing wave of love and need washed over her. It was so strong, so true, it almost brought her back to her knees. When Eric spoke though, his voice was startlingly soft, almost a whisper.

"I have only ever loved you, Sookie. I love you. I am in love with you and I will remain so until the day I cease to exist." They were the words he'd said to her on the night they spoke of her becoming like him.

They were the promise he'd made to her, that even though they might not find forever together, he would never be the one to leave her behind. As she felt the truth of them it broke her heart all over again to realize how wise he'd been to know that love, no matter how strong, no matter how deep, was never a guarantee of anything.

"I have tried to be content. I have tried to find peace in the way things must be. Freyda…she is a good woman and she has tried to make me happy. But I have never lied to you Sookie. What I found with you I will never find with another. What I feel for you, I will never feel for another. All these years, no matter how far away you were, no matter how I hard I tried to turn away, you have remained my wife in the only way that matters to me."

"Oh Eric...," Sookie sighed, feeling the incongruous combination of happiness and hopelessness all at once. "…what do we do now?"


	21. Chapter 21

_**A/N:**__ Thank you all so much for the wonderful response to the last chapter. I was so blown away and am, as always, beyond grateful!_

_Thanks as always and ever to my wonderful beta, __**Northman Maille**__. I really, really would be lost without you!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…I just thought it was time for a nookie break before more shit hits the fan!_

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Eric didn't hesitate to cross the space between them and take her in his arms. He had no idea what they could do, but he knew in this moment, for however long they could manage to stay in this room, they were each other's. He wouldn't…_couldn't _deny either of them the comfort and strength these brief minutes together might provide, or how they might be able to sustain them both through the decades of separation still to come.

"I don't know." His words were a whisper on Sookie's skin as he finally took her mouth with his own, sealing their lips together and drinking her in for the first time in what felt like eternity. "I don't know." He said again, a long moment later when his mouth left hers and began to trail desperate, biting kisses across her jaw and down her throat. "I don't know, but I love you, Sookie. I love you so much." He said as he bent down, his mouth lowering to lay small kisses on the exposed swells of her breasts.

Sookie couldn't help the soundless tears that slid down her cheeks as she felt Eric's mouth burning her skin.

When he pulled back, they stood for another long moment, looking at each other, so desperately in need of the other and yet, once again, afraid to act.

This time it wasn't fear the other had abandoned their love which stood between them. It was the strength of their love that seemed to hold them in place. If they did this, if they gave into the need and the desire, and tried to quell the longing and the pain, it might ease the hurt for the few moments they moved against each other, joined as one. But what about afterwards?

How did they go back? How did they leave this room after having touched and tasted and devoured every part of each other and return to another ninety years apart?

Sense and reason told them such a moment of weakness would only make it harder, but sense and reason seemed to have taken their leave when Sookie wrapped her arm around Eric's neck, tangled his hair between her fingers, and brought his face down to hers.

Where a Human would have consoled their lover with gentle kisses, Sookie let her tongue dart out and began to lick away the bloody track of Eric's tear, just as she'd done on the night he'd made her.

To a Vampire the action was nearly as exciting as being bitten and it was made all the more so as that little bit of himself entered Sookie's body, sending their long strained bond into a frenzy of ecstasy.

With a deep, needy growl Eric took Sookie's face between his hands and began to mimic her actions, licking the trails of blood, from her lust brightened eyes to the curve of her jaw. His reward, the deep, breathy moan that ripped from her lips, as her head fell back into the cups of his palms and her fangs slammed down.

The sight of Sookie's sharp teeth was the end for him. They were absolute perfection: small, dainty and feminine, yet lethally sharp. Eric remembered the sting of them entering his flesh, unlike anything else he'd felt in his thousand years, and the need to feel her tear him open again obliterated the last molecule of reason from his body.

Pushing Sookie away slightly he began stripping her of her gown. If Sookie had been able to think she might have laughed at how her beautiful dress was coming off in ribbons, exactly the way she'd pictured it when she'd dreamed of rejecting the Doge by sending his 'present' back in a shoe box.

Except she couldn't think a single thought beyond the absolute necessity of ridding Eric of every single accursed piece of fabric which stood between her mouth and the silk over steel of his skin.

Their mouths fused together. Their fangs scraped against one another, drawing blood from tongues and lips, as they stood in the center of the room, rending the clothes from each other's bodies, unseeing and uncaring of the ever-growing pile of destroyed fabric pooling at their feet.

Still, it would have taken time they didn't have to free themselves of everything. When Sookie stood in only her garters and stockings and Eric in nothing more than his dress shirt, ripped open and hanging from his shoulders, he picked Sookie up, one hand behind her knees, the other cradling her back and brought them to the grand bed which dominated the room.

Not wanting to break from Eric's mouth long enough to look for the gap in the gossamer curtains, Sookie simply reached out blindly. Grabbing the expensive material, she ripped it away from several of its rings, making an opening and letting it hang haphazardly.

Sookie gave a low snarl as she found herself tossed on the bed, but before she could reason, or even care, how she'd gotten from Eric's arms to the mattress: he was on top of her, wrenching her thighs apart and lowering his head to scent her desire with a growl of his own.

Even though she didn't need to, Sookie couldn't help her gasp of shock as she felt Eric's fangs graze her hidden folds, followed by the wetness of his tongue as he took one long, slow taste of her. She'd dreamed of being with him so many times. She'd imagined what their reunion would be like on that night, still ninety years off, when he was finally free and she could return to him. In her fantasies it was always a slow, reverent worship of each other's bodies.

She should have known as she was now, even with her memories and humanity returned, having him again after so long could never be a slow, gentle thing.

Their need for each other was as strong as their need for blood and after such starvation all either of them could think of was taking as much from the other, and giving as much of themselves in return as possible, before it was over.

Needing him now, Sookie took Eric by the shoulders, startling him from his vigil between her legs, and pushing him onto his back with all of her considerable strength. When his head hit the pillow, Eric growled again, partly upset that she'd stopped him from feasting on her and partly excited to see what she would do to him, now he was at her mercy.

Smiling down at him, her fangs pressed hard against her full lips, Sookie lowered her head and began a feast of her own. Licking the seam of Eric's lips, she coaxed them to open to her. She twirled her tongue briefly around his own distended and aching fangs, before moving down to lick the pulse of his neck and the indentation of his collar bones and to suck at the muscled plains of his chest, and finally to place stinging nips on both of his hardened nipples.

The last caused Eric to buck up against Sookie's mouth, his hands fisting into her hair, ruining her beautiful curls as his fingers tugged at her scalp, begging her to bite him more, to make him bleed and take him inside her.

Laughing wickedly, drunk on his body, Sookie lowered herself further. Letting her fangs graze a line from Eric's stomach muscles to his groin, causing him to cry out with the exquisite pain, she then retraced her steps, soothing the bleeding cut with her tongue.

She'd intended to taste him, but all of a sudden Sookie found herself once more flat on the bed as Eric loomed over her, her cut having driven him past the last stitch of his patience.

Driving his fingers into her hair, forcing her head up so that their eyes could lock, Eric wasted no more time. With one hard, endless thrust, he was deep insider her, causing them both to shout out at the rough pleasure of his entry.

Sookie's legs wrapped around Eric's waist and her hands braced themselves flat on his chest. Her nails scratched his skin in time to the brutal rhythm he'd set, as they thrashed against each other, frantic to meld into one being.

It only took a short time for their mutual pleasure to reach a frenzied peak and without a word or a sound between them, Sookie lifted her head and Eric lowered his. Their pleasures peaked and finally crashed down on them as they buried their fangs in the other's neck and began to drink deeply.

Time ceased to matter as did anything outside the cocoon of their bed. They gave and took from each other, trading one life force for the other, raising their joining from the animalistic frenzy of need it had been to something almost spiritual, a communion of souls.

As they drank and the bond burst open wide, Eric's hips began to move again, thrusting his still buried cock gently into Sookie as she moaned around the wound in his shoulder and began to lift her hips to meet him, thrust for thrust. When they finally pulled back, licking the other's marks as they watched them fade away, Eric brought them gently over the edge one more time.

Had Sookie still been a Human, Eric would have laid beside her, to give her time to recuperate from the wildness of their passion. As it was, he knew she required no such recovery, but the need to hold her was too great. Moving slightly to his side he took her in his arms and pressed her close, burying his face in her hair as he felt her hide her own in his chest.

"I can't do this anymore." He whispered into darkness that surrounded them. "I can't live without you, especially now you remember all we promised each other."

Sookie bit back the sob which wanted to escape from her lips. She'd known from the first she should not have told him. She knew it would do nothing but burden him, and yet she had anyway. Her guilt was almost as great as the ache she felt thinking of putting on what remained of her clothing and leaving him again.

If it had been within her power she would have returned with Eric, Freyda or no. Would it hurt to watch another parade around in the position that rightfully belonged to her, as his wife? Yes, it would sting and hurt and probably make her near crazy with anger and jealousy, but to be with him she would do it anyway, without hesitation.

No matter what lip service he was required to pay to Freyda, Sookie would always know it was herself whom Eric loved. And in the end, what was the one night he would spend with Freyda to all the others he would give to her? It might not have been enough when she'd been Human and filled to the brim with her high and mighty morals, or a new born Vampire easily lost to the haze of her possessive instincts, but she was more than either of those things now. She was older, calmer and, after a decade of longing for the man she loved, she hoped a little wiser.

Still, it wasn't up to her. Sookie knew Ocella made taking her with him a condition of letting her live for a single, obvious reason. She was a distraction to Eric which Ocella believed he could not afford. If she were there, Ocella feared Eric would not be able to successfully create the illusion Freyda was first in his life, or that duty meant more to him than his bonded child… and it would all fall apart. No, Ocella had been very wise demanding they divorce _and _Sookie come with him in exchange for her life.

"I don't want to let you go either, Eric. But it's not up to either of us." Sookie could feel Eric nodding against her hair even as their bond seemed to weep for them. They both knew, no matter how they railed against it, there was no changing things… for now.

It was only when Eric took her chin, lifting her face to his and dropping gentle kisses on her lips and fangs, Sookie felt as though the weight of everything had lessened enough to allow her to move again.

"We need to clean up." He said as he kissed his way to the shell of her ear. There was passion in his voice again and Sookie knew Eric had no intention of fumbling around looking for a bathroom.

Rising above her again, Eric laid one last kiss on Sookie's mouth before he began to lick his way down the column of her throat and to the hard tips of her nipples. He took each in his mouth by turn, sucking them to hard peaks, bathing them with his tongue before Sookie lifted his head to look him in the eye once more.

"I want to clean you up too." She whispered.

A hungry smile painted Eric's lips, as he turned on top of her so his powerful thighs bracketed her shoulders and his cock, already huge and granite hard again, grazed her lips. Determined, just as he was, to put off their parting for a little longer, Sookie cupped her hands against the globes of his magnificent bottom and used the leverage to raise herself enough to take his erection between her lips and deep down her throat.

Eric gave a single, hoarse cry before he dropped his head into her folds, which glistened beautifully now they were wet with both her own desire and the remnants of his release, and began to lick her softly.

They had almost brought each other to another shattering climax when Eric heard the sound of the door opening, followed by a sharp intake of breath. Looking up, still dazed from pleasure, it took him a moment to realize who stood there. The intruder stared at them, mouth open in an 'oh' of surprise, eyes betraying deep pain and jealous, burning anger.

"Eric, your Maker is looking for you." Their visitor said, her lip trembling as she fought to keep her voice steady. "There is a problem with your brother." With that, Freyda turned on her heel and left, slamming the door hard enough to crack the gold gilding, the sounds of her hurried footsteps echoing behind her as she fled from them.


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N:** Greetings from Denmark! I'm in Copenhagen this week on vacation, but yeah for hubby he found us a place with an internet connection! So I can still post while getting my Viking on! (There are also no Alps for him to attempt to drive us off of this time, which means this vacation is looking up!)

Thank you, as always, to everyone who's been reading, alerting, favoriting, and especially reviewing! Y'all ROCK!

And thanks as always to my rad, fab, awesome beta **Northman Maille**!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing….

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"Oh God!"

The words fell from Sookie's mouth as she sat up against the head of the bed. Her body which had, up until a moment ago, been lost in a haze of lust and need, now began to tremble with fear.

No sooner had Eric righted himself, than she threw her arms around him, holding him to her tightly. She'd known of course that their time together was fleeting. She'd promised herself when they'd finished loving each other she would let him go, back to his duties, back to his wife, and she would return to her life with Ocella, grateful for the brief moment they'd stolen.

Giving him up again, especially now she remembered everything, would be excruciating, but she would have done it, without complaint. She would have done it because it was the only thing to do. Neither the return of her memories nor their admittances of enduring love changed anything in that regard. But now…now all she could think about was the look in Freyda's eyes.

Realistically, Sookie knew they'd done nothing wrong. Eric wasn't required to give the Queen his fidelity, not by a long shot. But she'd seen the way Freyda looked at him. Even if Eric was only feigning his affection for the sake of appearances, it was clear, she was not. With her memories fully restored, and over a decade as a Vampire already behind her, Sookie had a wealth of evidence to remind her an angry King or Queen was a dangerous thing.

"What will happen to you?" She asked, as she all but buried her face in the hard plains of his chest, trying to find comfort in the physical evidence of his strength.

"I will be fine." He told her, his voice steady and sure as he returned her possessive embrace.

"She's in love with you." Sookie countered, looking up from his chest, red rimming her eyes once again but not falling.

"I know." Eric answered. "But I have been honest with her from the beginning. She knows my heart is, and always was, yours. And she knows no matter what she feels for me, she has no right to be upset by this. You are my bonded and my child. Even without the titles of 'husband and wife' we have every right to each other."

Sookie nodded, before resting her head back on his chest. She could feel their last moments together slipping away and the dull ache of missing him was already reforming in the pit of her stomach. She could feel the same throbbing pain within Eric and knew how hard he was struggling, when she felt his resignation harden into resolve.

"Come we must find Ocella." He said, his voice tinted with sadness as he determinedly disentangled himself from her body.

Following Eric reluctantly, Sookie rose from the bed and walked over to join him in front the pile of torn fabric that had been their beautiful clothing. Silently, they began sifting through it, looking to see what was still wearable.

There wasn't much. The button on Eric's pants was long gone but the zipper still worked. Her dress was completely destroyed but her corset was intact. Taking Eric's rent shirt , which he offered her, and using one of the strips of her dress as a belt, it covered enough to keep her decent. Still there would be no mistaking what had left them in such a state.

As they dressed, Sookie's worries began to shift from Freyda herself to what Freyda said. There could only be one 'problem' with Alexei and it usually ended in whitewashing a murder scene and fleeing from retribution. Those things hadn't bothered her much in the past, beyond the worry of being caught, but now….

Now Sookie worried for the innocents he might be hurting. She worried about what her part in cleaning his mess might be (She'd had to put down a Human he'd mangled beyond repair more than once). And she feared what price Ocella might be willing to pay to get Alexei out of trouble, since Sookie had no doubt, if Freyda knew, so did everyone else.

It all spun around in her brain like a maelstrom as they dressed, one apprehension mounting on top of another. When they were finished they knew there was no more time to waste and turned to leave the room, but just at the threshold Eric suddenly turned back. Walking to the pile of clothing once more, he began to rummage through it intently. When he returned she could see he was, for some reason, carrying her necklace and bracelet.

"Put these back on." He told her, handing her the bracelet as he moved behind her and refastened the necklace.

Sookie wanted to ask why he'd gone back for her jewelry, but when he finished fastening the clasp and gently turned her around, pulling her into his arms for one last longing kiss, anything beyond how much she loved him seemed to fade away.

"I love you." He said when he finally pulled back.

"I love you too!" She answered still clutching at his shoulders.

Sookie knew they had to go, but she couldn't stop herself from saying one last thing. If another ninety years passed without their seeing each other again, she needed to know he knew this one truth.

"You know I didn't ever want to leave you, don't you? I did it because it was for the best, but I never wanted it. Even getting to free the dark part of me…it was a consolation _not _a motivation." Sookie felt a wave of forgiveness and love wash through the bond and practically engulf her as Eric leaned down and claimed one more, soft kiss.

"I know, lover." He reassured her. "It hurt so keenly that night, but I too knew it had to happen. As long as you live, no matter how long it takes, we can still have our forever. As long as you live there is hope.

But if either of us had rebelled that night you would be finally dead now and I would have followed soon after. There were no other options. I don't blame you for being pragmatic with your life. I need you to be. When these decades are over, you must still be alive so you can return to me."

Sookie couldn't help the smile that broke across her face. There was so much pain waiting to be felt from their parting, so much anxiety waiting to be realized when they found Alexei and Ocella, but in this moment she was simply happy. Eric still loved her and they _would_ be reunited, no matter how long it took.

"I will Eric. When this is over nothing will keep me from you." Sookie could feel the joy radiating from Eric as well, and they shared a last, loving look before finally leaving the room and returning to reality.

It hit them both hard when they descended the staircase to find both Freyda and Marco waiting for them. Their expressions were both dark but in different ways. Where Freyda seemed to exude a quiet heartbrokenness, Marco was all but visibly emitting fire and brimstone. The look of jealous rage he pinned Eric with made Sookie scared for a moment he might actually try to do her love harm. It wasn't helped by the fact Eric seemed to have a triumphant smirk etched onto his face every time he made eye contact with the Doge.

"Northman, your Maker has left the palace in search of your brother. Since you could not be easily found he decided to go on ahead and bade me instruct you to follow." The Duke's words were clipped and dripping with annoyance, but when he finally turned his gaze from Eric to Sookie, she felt a moment of ice-cold terror race through her.

His anger was still abundant but she didn't miss the way his eyes swept over her with malevolent lust, while he ran his tongue over a distended fang. Suddenly Sookie found herself hoping whatever trouble Alexei found would have them fleeing the city, racing the first rays of dawn. If it did not and they remained here, she had no doubt the Duke would take great pleasure in _punishing _her for spurning his affections in favor of the 'loutish barbarian'.

For the moment though she was happy to see him turn on his heel, petulantly, and stride away without a backward glance.

"We must go in search of Ocella." Eric said, turning his attention to his wife. "I do not expect to return tonight." He told her before walking away, his hand firmly clasping Sookie's, ignoring Freyda's stricken nod of acceptance.

He knew he would have to speak with her soon and he was unsure what he could say. She'd seemed determined, before tonight, to continue hoping in vain things between them would change. He had no idea how she would come to terms with the clear evidence, that no matter what distance was between him and Sookie, his heart would remain firmly with his bonded.

As they began to make their way through the still reveling throngs in the palace though, all his worries receded into the background and Eric felt the hunter within him take possession of his body. Reaching out with his blood, feeling his instincts rise and his senses sharpen, he began to probe the mystical connection tethering him to his Maker and his Maker's younger progeny. Beside him he felt Sookie doing the same, letting the remaining Human parts of her retreat into the recesses of her mind and allowing her Vampiric self to take precedence.

Eric couldn't help it when his fangs slammed down in primal lust at the sight and feel of her preparing to hunt beside him. Looking at her briefly he felt himself growing excited for what was to come. It was almost like the fantasy he'd had so many years ago. He and Sookie, lost to their natures, stalking their prey in the night, in the remains of what had once been fine clothes.

Centering himself once more, sensing she too knew where they should go, they left the palace grounds.

Without a word spoken between them, they snaked their way seamlessly through the city. Weaving gracefully through the even drunker and more ecstatic crowds lining the Grand Canal, following the whisper of their blood to the narrower more deserted back streets, jumping easily over the waterways that crisscrossed the city like veins through a body.

As they got closer and closer to their unknown destination they began to feel the echoes of pain coming from both Ocella and Alexei, and it caused them both to hiss in primitive anger.

Their blood finally brought them to an empty alleyway. Clinging to the sides of the buildings, staying hidden in the shadows, they saw Ocella and Alexei up ahead, near one of the smaller bridges that linked the streets.

They were not alone though. They were surrounded on both sides by about twenty Humans armed with stakes, silver daggers and nets. Somehow the Humans had managed to capture Ocella with a silver net, and they'd dragged him to the foot of the bridge, standing over him menacingly, stakes in hand.

Alexei was still free, but he was covered almost everywhere in deep knife wounds, as he stood in the middle of the bridge hissing wildly. It was clear he was weakening, but as his body began to succumb to the silver that was no doubt poisoning him, his mind, never very strong, was being completely consumed by his madness, making him even more dangerous than before.

"Take the right side." Eric instructed her in a whisper so low no one else would be able to hear it.

Sookie nodded, her fangs dripping in saliva as her bloodlust took her completely. If they had been innocents, if they had been merely Humans defending themselves from Alexei's crazed violence, Sookie felt sure she wouldn't have been able to give in so easily to her darker desires. But the evidence they were much more was clear in the weapons they carried, and it gave her the ability to turn off her Human conscience and fully release her predator.

Sookie watched as Eric jumped the canal, landing soundlessly on the other side. He turned to her, his own razor sharp fangs fully distended, his eyes bright with unrestrained joy for the battle, and gave her a small nod of his head to let her know to strike.

Their superior strength and speed, along with the element of surprise, had them taking the Humans who threatened their kin completely unawares. The battle was short and one sided. The first three Humans fell at Sookie's feet, their necks broken before they even knew they were in danger. The next few she took using their own daggers to slice them to ribbons.

By the time Sookie looked up from her last kill it was over. The Humans were all dead, save one which Eric was holding a foot off the ground by his throat.

Sookie looked around quickly, willing the bloodlust to recede enough so she could help Ocella. Alexei was crouched over one of the men she'd killed, draining him dry, his wounds healing slowly, but surely. Picking up one of the stakes, she made her way quickly to Ocella and used it lift the silver net off of him.

He nodded his head to her in thanks, before picking up one of the men Eric had killed and sinking his fangs in deeply, attempting to drain all the precious blood off before it began to cool.

Sookie was about to pick up one of the other bodies, her bloodlust demanding she drink, when she saw Alexei out of the corner of her eye. She knew the fight had probably even more deeply deranged him, but she'd never expected what happened next. Without thought, without the mere glimmer he recognized any of them, he picked up a dropped stake and with all of his speed, raced towards Ocella.

Equally unexpecting and lost in his thirst, her Master never saw his child coming. Sookie tried to scream out a warning, but before a sound could leave her throat, Alexei had planted the stake deeply in Ocella's back.

Pain, vicarious but hot and throbbing, burst through Sookie's back and she felt herself drop from her knees to lie on the cold cobblestones. Distantly she heard the sound of Eric screaming out in pain too, and then the sounds of the man he'd captured, running for his life.

Pulling herself up, trying desperately to force the pain to the back of her mind so she could function, Sookie rose slowly only to see Alexei advancing on Eric. It was clear, in his madness, he was completely disconnected from the pain Ocella's death was causing them all, and panic took her that neither of them could stop him. Reacting on pure instinct, she rushed Alexei jumping on his back and clawing at his healing wounds, trying desperately to keep him away from Eric.

Alexei threw her off his back and into the stucco façade of one of the buildings. She hit hard enough to crack the entire wall before falling to the ground. The sound of the walls supports buckling was the only warning she got before the small balcony above her came crashing down to the ground.

Sookie managed to roll away, painfully, just in time to miss the falling wrought iron and hissing in rage, she tried to pick herself back up, only to find the pain in her back now was far from vicarious. Colliding into the wall had broken her spine and her legs were useless.

Alexei's attention was completely on her now and she watched as he again began to stalk towards her. She saw Eric behind him, still incapacitated, now from both the death of Ocella and the pain filtering to him from her broken back.

There was nothing around her but rubble and dust, the nearest weapon being the stake Alexei clutched in his hand, still wet with his Maker's blood, raised and ready to end her as well. Desperate to buy herself time till she was healed enough to stand, or Eric was well enough to help her, Sookie ripped her necklace from her throat. If she could reopen one of Alexei's deeper wounds she might be able get him to drop the stake or stagger back enough for her to crawl to one of the other weapons.

Knowing it would hurt the most, Sookie waited till he was all but on top of her, hissing and snarling, fangs dripping with saliva. When he raised the stake high to strike, she drove the stiff metal of her necklace through the knife wound over his heart, pushing it, and the sharp edged jewels that adorned it, in till only the clasp was visible. Alexei had only enough time to give a single shocked roar of pain before he suddenly fell to dust around her.

Staring incredulously at the remains of her friend, Sookie tried to make sense of what just happened. Looking over at Eric, still on the ground, but trying to rise to get to her, she saw a smile break through his pain.

"Jesus Christ, Shepherd of Judea!" She whispered under her breath. "What the fuck just happened?"

"The necklace is made of jet." Eric answered her matter-of-factly. When he saw the confusion still plain on Sookie's face he managed to grunt out a laugh. "Jet," he explained, "it looks like a stone, like onyx, but it's actually fossilized wood."

Despite the pain radiating through every part of her body, Sookie burst out laughing too. The whole night had been one giant rollercoaster, hurling her from one emotional extreme to another, and she found herself nearly hysterical by the time Eric made his way over to her, laughing and crying all at the same time.

Moving away the bits of rubble that surrounded her, he bent gingerly and picked her up. Cradling her body to his, he breathed unnecessarily in relief, trying to calm the ever rising hysteria wanting to engulf him as well. His maker was finally dead. His bonded had very nearly met her own end, and they were both still suffering from the aftermath of their bonds with Ocella severing. It was almost too much for one night, but he knew Sookie needed his strength right now. It might be the only thing that helped her step back from her overwhelming emotions.

"Who were they?" She asked, when the calm Eric was trying to surround them both in finally penetrated her brief moment of insanity.

Eric carried her over to one of the corpses so she could feed and heal. As she sunk her fangs into the man, forcing herself to swallow the now tepid blood, Eric fished out the wallet he carried in his back pocket.

She could feel his incredulity that the Humans had been so stupid as to try to commit murder with their identifications on them. Still, if it helped them figure out why this happened she wouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth.

"They're German." He said, reading his ID.

Sookie could only nod as the pieces fell into place for her.

"Alexei killed a man's wife and child while we were there. He managed to do it without being caught and Ocella and I didn't realize it until the attack on the club happened nights later. He must have been after Alexei and followed us here." It was the only thing that made sense to her.

Eric dropped the ID and wallet into the water and held out his hand to Sookie.

"Can you stand?" He asked.

Sookie nodded but when she tried to get up, her legs buckled underneath her. She would need to rest for the day before she was completely healed.

Seeing her struggle, Eric took her in his arms once more and began streaking through the streets. Sookie could sense he was also still in pain, but since his pain was a direct result of her own injuries and Ocella's death, the blood he'd taken from one of the Humans had him almost back to normal.

"Where are you staying?" He asked her as they again weaved through the crowd, grateful the drunken Humans around them were too caught up in the atmosphere of celebration to notice two Vampires, covered in blood, moving among them.

"The Doge's villa."

"It will not be safe for you to rest there." He said, his voice hard, and tinged with a bit of angry jealousy. "I saw the way he looked at you. If he were to find you alone there is no telling what he would do."

Sookie knew without having to ask Eric was referring to Marco and she was grateful he had no intention of leaving her at the Doge's mercy.

"You will rest with me tonight." He said firmly, though Sookie could feel the zing of pleasure that raced through them both at the prospect.

"Lead the way." She chuckled softly, before resting her head back on his shoulder and allowing him to take them wherever he wished.

Eric chose a non-descript hotel by the bridge that led to the Venice train station. It was expensive to be sure, everything in the city seemed to be, but it was hardly the kind of place one would expect a Vampire Prince to stay in.

Before they walked through the door, Eric stopped a drunken reveler on the street and glamoured the man into giving over his wallet. A satisfied grin crossed his face as he pulled out three five hundred Euro bills and gave the wallet back, making sure the man had no memory of how his money was lost.

"Fools." Eric muttered under his breath as they walked into the lobby.

Within minutes they had a light tight room.

Setting Sookie down in one of the rooms overstuffed armchairs, Eric locked the door and checked to make sure the light tight shutters were secure. When he was satisfied they wouldn't be burnt to a crisp by a chink in the window coverings, he went into the adjoining bathroom and started a bath for them both.

Once it was ready he carried Sookie in, stripping her of his blood soaked shirt and her corset and helping her into the tub. Sitting down behind her, he pulled her back flush against his chest.

For a moment they simply sat there allowing the water to calm them and wash away the blood and bits of gore covering them. If Sookie had been Human she would have thought herself in shock. Her master and her brother, uncle she supposed was the more correct term, were finally dead. She was free, she was whole once more, and she was here in this little bathroom, in Eric's arms.

"When do you leave?" She asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

"Tomorrow, just after midnight." Eric sighed behind her, not wanting to think on such things. "What will you do now?" He asked her in return.

Sookie hadn't really had a moment to ponder something as practical as that, but now the choice was before her she knew there was only place she wanted to go, no matter how hard it might be.

"I'm going with you." She answered, matter-of-factly, before adding, in an unsure whisper. "If you'll have me."

Eric's reaction was swift as his arms all but crushed her to his body, and their bond flooded with relief and joy.

"I will have no other, for as long as I exist," was his passionate reply.

Sookie still didn't think she deserved to, especially after the events of the night, but she couldn't help sending up a small, meek prayer of thanks. She knew it was probably evil to its very core to thank God for the murder of so many, but the fact remained that without the evil done tonight, she and Eric would most certainly have been parted again.

"When did you remember?" He asked, softly breaking into her revere.

"A few nights ago." She began, telling him everything from the club in Baden Baden till they saw each other again earlier in the night.

"That was what I felt from you then." He said, telling her what he'd sensed, even from so far away, and what he'd been led to believe by their Master, in return.

"I don't know what to feel, Eric." She admitted when he finished.

When she felt Eric's confusion, she tried to put into words something she felt might never make any sense to anyone, even her.

"I cared for Ocella. He taught me so much. He took care of me at a time when I felt so lost to the darkness inside of me. He knew how to feed it and control it all at the same time and he showed me how to master it. I know, in his way, he cared for me to.

Still, it doesn't change the fact he deliberately separated us. He willingly and purposely caused us so much pain just to get what he wanted. I want to grieve for him. I want to feel sorry that he died at the hands of the being he loved, sheltered and protected the most, but part of me is…relieved, _happy_ he's gone."

Eric's hands began to rub soothingly up and down her arms at her confession and his lips went to the curve of her neck, laying soft kisses there. He wasn't sure how to explain to her what she felt was normal for a Vampire when they were freed from their Master.

"I feel the same, Sookie. He taught me much and gave me immortality. I will always be grateful for that. But I am not sorry he can no longer control either of us and you should not feel guilty for feeling the same."

Sookie's response was a quiet snort, even as she nuzzled herself further against him.

"I suppose, I should stop worrying. I knew before you turned me I was a pretty bad Christian. I guess if God's keeping score, I'm already so far down in hell it doesn't matter what I do or feel anymore."

"You must not punish yourself this way, Lover. I won't have you turning into another Compton." Sookie could sense he was trying to cheer her and, when she couldn't help but laugh, she had to admit he'd succeeded.

No, she didn't want to be another Bill either, constantly loathing her existence yet never able to rise above it enough to keep from succumbing to her baser nature. Somehow she would have to find a way to reconcile her opposing halves, and she felt, with Eric by her side once more, she might just be able to do it.

They fell into the wide bed in their room an hour before dawn.

Sookie still felt the pain of her damaged back acutely, but nothing could stop the desire she felt to be with Eric once more before the sun took them. She had no idea what would happen when she returned with him, but for now, for these few glorious hours more they could simply be together.

She knew Eric felt the same when he gently parted her still injured legs and came to rest carefully between them. Their eyes locked together, their bond opened wide once more, and feelings of love and need and hope flared bright and hot.

They had no need of anything but each other and when he slowly, tenderly entered her, Sookie sighed with pure rapture. Winding her arms around him and holding him close she let him take control, stroking deeply within her, bringing them both to a quiet but shattering release.

"This is our true beginning Sookie." He whispered softly into her ear as he came to lay pressed beside her, the aftermath of their pleasure still drugging them both. "This time nothing and no will stand between us!"


	23. Chapter 23

_**A/N:**__ Thank you again to everyone who's been following this story: reading, alerting, favoriting and especially reviewing!_

_Some people had asked if the story was over after last chapter. Not just yet. We still need to find out what Felipe is up to. Victor and Bill are still skulking around and, of course, Eric needs a divorce! So a few things to wrap up still!_

_Thanks so much to my wonderful beta, __**Northman Maille**__! I have to give credit where credit is due: the Jet necklace as a stake was all her idea and it was so FAB!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…_

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

Hands, cool and strong, caressed her body. Lips, soft but insistent, followed in their path. Teeth, teasingly sharp, scraped the column of her throat. His scent, like an icy gale over the freezing northern sea, surrounded her. It felt so good…_so right_, but the ever present fear it might all be a dream, kept Sookie from opening her eyes.

She'd had this particular dream so many times before. Always so certain this time it would be real, only to wake alone, the taste of the Human she'd used to fuel her fantasy the previous night still strong on her tongue.

"Sookie, open your eyes." His voice commanded, so seductively, so compellingly. "Come back to me from the darkness, Lover. I need you."

Every fiber of her being longed to obey, but she couldn't. She couldn't bear to take the final step back from the oblivion of death, only to find his specter had already faded away.

As she fought the need to rise, Sookie felt something hard and cool cover the length of her body, followed by the caress of silky hair tickling over her shoulders, across the swells of her breasts, tempting her nipples to hard, tingling peaks.

Then it came, the excruciatingly beautiful feel of his tongue sweeping through her folds.

"_Eric!"_ His name was ripped from her throat as her hands, despite her longing to continue her dream, lifted from their places by her sides…trying to capture the golden strands of her phantom lover's hair.

Shock, searing yet joyful, shot through her as she felt the long fall of his hair between her fingers. Her eyes, which she'd held so forcefully closed, sprang open and a gasp was pulled from her throat as she saw he was really there.

He looked up at her then, his tongue still playing sinfully between her thighs. She could see a naughty smile crinkling the corners of his eyes. Privy to her fears, he sent her love and reassurance, need and desire through their bond.

"I was sure you were a dream." She whispered, still not convinced she could trust the evidence of her hands and eyes. "You're always a dream."

After one last, long taste of her, he lifted himself up, his body coming to cage hers completely. His hands tangled in her hair, a match to her own which still clutched him desperately, and their gazes locked.

"I was afraid to, when I woke to find you beside me. I feared if I touched you, you might simply disappear. But you did not. We're really here, and finally, you are truly mine!" Joy zinged between them almost like an electric jolt, but before she could gather her wits enough to answer him, his mouth took hers fiercely.

Last night they'd been starving for each other, barely able to restrain the lust within them. Now, having slaked the worst of their terrible thirst, they were slower, softer, but no less passionate.

Rising up beneath him, she rubbed the length of her body against his, her breasts crushing against his chest, frantic to mark him with her scent and to take his own on her skin. Her hands, finally freed his hair to skate the length of his back. They didn't find peace until they'd cupped the globes of his ass, squeezing hard, recommitting his magnificence to her memory.

Eric's mouth refused to leave her skin, even has he spread her thighs wider with an impatient knee. His need to be over her, in her, surrounded by her, was a beast of its own creation, fueled by every burning touch of her body against his.

Bracing himself on his elbows, he took hold of her hips and with one final, ravenous kiss he dove deep, driving in nearly to the hilt, in one sure thrust.

The feel of his cock, sheathed so perfectly within her, caused them both to roar with pleasure, but it still wasn't enough… for either of them. He needed to be deeper. She needed to take him completely.

Hauling her up, Eric knelt on the bed, pulling Sookie astride him. She went eagerly, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and bracing her feet behind him. From this angle they were fully, gloriously one. The pleasure of it made holding back his need to come, to bathe her insides and mark her unmistakably as his, a torture Eric could barely withstand. Yet it was worth every bit of his considerable control when she began to ride him wildly.

"Harder Lover!" He commanded as they moved together, the peak so close. "Take me deeper, I need you so badly!" His words were panted gasps as he captured one of her mesmerizing breasts in his mouth and sucked hard, pushing her to the point of frenzy.

"Eric! God, Eric, nothing…_no one_ else has ever felt like this." She cried, her head falling back as his fangs pierced the soft flesh around her nipple.

His groan of pleasure hit her ears just as his fangs released her skin. Taking their place, his tongue darted out to sooth her wound and the hard bud of her nipple all at once.

"Because on one else is meant for you!" He growled, bucking up hard. "You are mine, only mine! Make me yours Sookie. _Mark me_ as yours!"

With his words she felt the last of her sense flee and she struck hard and fast, her fangs tearing apart the sensitive point where his neck met his shoulder.

It was the end for both of them and they came together. Writhing against each other they screamed their ecstasy, heedless of anything but the completion they felt.

When it was over they simply sat there, clinging to each other, waiting for sanity to return.

Sookie clutched at Eric, burying her head in the crook of his shoulder. If she had been human she would have been gasping, desperate for air. Instead she simply rejoiced in the feeling of him around and inside her. She reveled in their combined scents mingling with the aroma of wild sex, making pure perfume out of the air.

After a few minutes, Eric lifted her chin gently with his fingers and kissed her forehead with an aching softness. Their happiness was almost overwhelming through the bond, and he had never been more willing to drown in an emotion than he was now.

"Come my love. We need to get some clothing and then we must meet Felipe and Freyda for our flight home." _Home_! The word made her happiness swell to impossible proportions. She was really going home, _with Eric_.

She knew this was far from the end of the obstacles which stood between them. Eric was still bound to Freyda and Sookie was sure she wouldn't give him up easily or soon. Felipe was still very much in favor of the union, meaning he would put his considerable weight behind making sure Eric remained married for another ninety years. But Sookie would not let any of it destroy the happiness she felt right now.

They had promised each other eternity and they would have it!

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

An hour later, having purchased new clothing with the remaining money Eric took from the drunken Human the night before, they arrived at the Doge's private air strip just outside the city. Freyda, Felipe and Marco were all waiting for them, with the other members of their party, varying expressions of displeasure on their faces. Taking Sookie's hand more firmly in his, Eric paid it no attention.

"Where is your Maker, Northman?" The Doge asked, stepping away from the others.

"He met his final death at the hands of my brother last night. Sookie in turn gave Alexei his final end for having staked our Maker. They are both no more." His answer was voiced strongly, daring any of them to challenge it.

There was a moment of silence when all three seemed to consider what Eric said. In the end they all recognized, even if it was a lie, it was better to accept his word. Alexei had been a danger to himself and to all of their kind. His recklessness, if ever discovered, could have turned the Humans, always fickle in their acceptance of the supernatural, against all Vampires. Ocella's inability to control him and unwillingness to end his unstable progeny was equally dangerous; and the fact they'd each had a hand, at one point or another, in allowing Alexei and Ocella to continue wreaking havoc might come to light if any kind of formal punishment was pursued.

This quiet end to both of them was for the best.

"Very well." The Duke proclaimed imperiously for all of them.

Turning to Sookie he let a falsely sympathetic smile light his features. "Sookie I offer you my protection and a place to stay since you are now without your Master." His words held not even a hint of question to them. He truly believed, given such a _gracious _offer, she would not even think of refusing.

"I thank you your Grace, but it's time I returned home. My _Maker _and bonded has need of me." She replied sweetly, and felt Eric stifle a sneering chuckle.

Neither of them missed Freyda's almost, but not quite, infinitesimal stiffening at Sookie's words. But they both knew, at least in this, she could not argue. A Maker's entitlement to their child and a Vampire's entitlement to their bonded were sacred rights no one had the power to overrule.

"Very well," was all the Duke said before turning back to Felipe and Freyda. "Then I wish you good journey my friends." With that, the Doge took his leave of them, his men falling into step behind him.

They boarded the plane silently, but were not in the air more than a few minutes when Freyda rose gracefully from her seat and motioned harshly for Eric to follow her. She led them to the private area the Doge had set up as an onboard conference room.

"What do you intend to do with your prodigal child?" She began without preamble, rounding on him the moment the door was shut.

Eric had known it was coming, but the venom in her voice was still surprising. Like himself, Freyda had always been pragmatic. He'd held her understanding and acceptance of the things that could not be changed in high esteem. As well as her ability to bend those things which were malleable to her benefit.

It seemed love made irrational fools, and did so indiscriminately. He had been its helpless thrall for over a decade already and now so was she.

"She_ is_ my child as well as my bonded. I intend to bring her to my side. It is my right Freyda, not even a marriage contract can nullify that." He made sure to keep his voice painstakingly neutral, but it seemed his calm only further incensed her.

"Be that as it may, I am still Queen of Oklahoma and as long as that is so, _she_ is not welcome in my Kingdom!

I will not be made a fool of, forced to sit back helplessly, while you flaunt her and your_ affection_ for her, before my subjects. When you are in Louisiana, you may dally with her as you please. But she will only ever enter my territory over my ashes!"

Eric found himself gripping his control hard. It took everything within him not to remind her, at roughly three centuries her senior, it would not be hard to make her edict a reality.  
>Still, he knew the person she was behind this jealous anger and he knew eventually she would calm down. When she did, he hoped she would see the injustice of her ruling and the futility of her jealousy.<p>

He took no pleasure in hurting her, but she'd always known, in agreeing to Ocella's offer, she'd broken his marriage and separated him from his love. Nor could she have ever been deluded, even in the beginning when they'd barely spoken to one another, that he'd married Sookie for anything but love. Aside from the unions of Royalty, Vampires rarely married, especially not to Humans, and never for any reason but love.

"Very well, Majesty." He said, bowing to her slightly.

Having won the argument Freyda seemed to calm somewhat.

"You may take three nights to escort her home and help her settle, than I will expect you back." She told him, walking past without a backward glance.

Eric could already sense a tiny bit of remorse in her voice, but he knew it would take more than one night for her to come to terms with this new reality. When Sookie had been nothing more than a distant ache in his heart, Freyda had allowed herself to believe she could supersede the hold Sookie's memory had on him. Now Sookie was flesh and blood instead of merely fantasy and she was being forced to accept the end of her hope.

When he returned to the main cabin he found them all sitting in charged silence. Freyda angry, Sookie attempting to keep from further incensing Freyda with her presence, and Felipe (as men often were) bewildered by the quiet antagonism surrounding him, but smart enough to know keeping his mouth closed was in his best interests.

Not wishing to join the silent fray, Eric walked over to a seat by the window which held a small table. On top of it was the jet's sky phone. Entering the numbers quickly he waited for the call to connect and was warmed by the sound of his eldest child's voice... slightly.

"You had better not be taking the coward's way out by calling if you didn't get the entire Dolce spring collection. At least have the decency to tell me to my face so I can kick you in the balls." Pam was always the perfect balm to what ailed him.

"Relax, it's on the plane with me Pam. It has its own luggage." He replied dryly.

"In that case I hope you had a pleasant trip and I'm breathless for your return." He could hear her satisfied smirk across the phone line.

"You're concern for my well-being is like the warmth of the sun itself Pam." He retorted.

Her answering snort was as lady like as ever.

"Before or after your turning?"

"At present… most definitely after." He paused briefly before finally revealing the purpose of his call. "I have news which I believe may make you even happier than owning next season's couture."

"Don't mock me Eric. We both know the only thing that would make me happier than next season's collection was if you'd turned Dolce and Gabbana themselves and planned to enslave them as my personal tailors." He would have laughed, but he knew she was drop dead serious. She'd already asked for that exact thing…more than once.

"Next trip." He deadpanned. "I will however be bringing Sookie home with me."

There was a good ten second long silence on the other end.

"Pam?" He prompted her.

"You're serious?" her voice was a whisper now but he could sense her excitement even across the many miles still separating them.

"We will see you tomorrow night." He said. "She will be staying in Shreveport with you."

"What happened?" Pam asked, her voice suddenly turning worried.

"Too much to discuss over the phone. Just have my house ready." He instructed and then, looking over at Sookie and seeing her small smile, he added "and the farmhouse in Bon Temps as well."

"Of course," came her trembling reply. Eric could tell he'd taken Pam completely by surprise and it _was_ a better one than couture. "Hurry home Eric."

"We will."


	24. Chapter 24

_**A/N:**__ Thank you all so much for the support you've given this story! I made if over a 1000 reviews last chapter! I would send you all flowers, chocolates and love poems if I could!_

_And huge, epic, Viking Vampire sized hugs to my awesome beta, __**Northman Maille**__. You know how I gush, and yet there still aren't words to tell you how much I love you!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…._

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

As the jet started its descent into Shreveport's small private air field, Sookie couldn't help the swelling feeling in her heart…_home_! Even before her memories returned she'd missed it, felt it calling to her. She'd had to stifle her longing so many times by reminding herself it would be long decades before she could see it again.

Now she was here and she would see Pam and Miriam again! She could call Jason and let him know she was alright. Hopefully, when she explained everything that happened, he would forgive her for having abandoned him, and allow her to be a part of his life again. She felt almost giddy thinking about it and her happiness would have been perfectly complete if not for the fact she and Eric would soon be separated again.

She'd heard his argument with Freyda, or rather the Queen's one-sided tantrum, all the way out in the main cabin, and knew she wouldn't be allowed to go with them to Oklahoma. Still, six months of separation was nothing compared to the ten years they'd been forced to endure. Plus, with Ocella gone, there was nothing standing in the way of their having contact while Eric was away.

Sookie felt a hand on her shoulder and turned from the small plane window to see Eric smiling down at her from his seat beside her. No doubt feeling her thoughts were about him. She knew it was probably pushing Freyda unnecessarily, but that wasn't reason enough to stop her from turning fully and throwing her arms around Eric's neck, hugging him close and letting him feel all of her love.

They were home and they had three more nights all to themselves. She would make sure he didn't forget a single moment of them before he left for Oklahoma again.

Once the plane had taxied down the runway, Eric stood, taking Sookie's hand. They both made silent bows to Freyda and Felipe, before walking toward the cabin door, which the pilot was just opening.

"Three nights, Eric." Freyda called after them, her voice commanding even as her face betrayed her discomfiture. He knew she was holding on hard to her bitterness, but underneath she was already embarrassed and unsettled by her uncharacteristic fit of temper.

Eric's only response was a nod of his head before he helped Sookie down the stairs and out onto the tarmac. There was a car waiting for them, which Sookie recognized as a newer version of the silver Mercedes Minivan Pam used to have. As they made their way to it the driver's side door opened and Miriam stepped out.

"Sookie!" Miriam all but squealed in excitement. She had always been a warm and bouncy person as a Human (except when she was sick) and it appeared nothing had changed now she was a Vampire.

"Miriam!" Sookie responded, her excitement all but bubbling over, as she rushed at heightened speed to stand before her friend.

Sookie stopped just in front of her sister's child and looked her over from top to bottom. She hadn't been given the chance to see Miriam as a Vampire before she left. Ocella had insisted they depart at sunset the night after she'd convinced Eric to sign the divorce papers. Sookie had barely even been allowed to say goodbye to Eric himself and, even then, only in Ocella's presence.

"Where's Pam?" Eric interjected.

"She's at Fangtasia. She asked that you and Sookie stop there before going to your house or to Bon Temps, there are a few things that require your personal attention." Eric nodded stifling a groan.

Pam probably just wanted her gifts as soon as possible. Eric tried not to scowl, or laugh, as he got into the car's front passenger seat. Did something still count as a 'gift' if the giver had only obtained it at (figurative) stake point?

Once all of the bags were loaded into the Van, which, with Pam's present, required the airport staff to lower two of the seats in the second row and all of the seats in the last, they took off.

Eric hated having to leave Sookie so soon. But he couldn't help feeling overwhelmingly joyful, in the moment, as she grabbed his hand, from her perch on the edge of the seat behind Miriam, and all but beamed through their bond while looking out at her surroundings.

Shreveport hadn't changed much in the last ten years, except for the fact it now, again, had only one Vampire bar. Eric's first act as Prince Consort had been to order "The Crypt" shut down and Victor back to New Orleans. It wasn't for purely petty reasons of course. Making Victor leave had ensured it would be harder for him to spy on Eric and his people, and as Sherriff of Area One it was where he belonged. But Eric couldn't lie to himself: it had felt good…very, _very_ good.

As Miriam parked in front of Fangtasia, Eric was surprised to see more than a few cars sitting in the parking lot even though it was technically past closing. As Pam's child, Eric could feel Miriam clearly when they were near to each other, and what he got from her now was a bubbling anticipation, something beyond mere pleasure at getting to see Sookie again. He had to give her credit though, if not for their connection he would never have known anything was up. Pam had taught her well.

As they walked through the front doors he saw exactly what Miriam had been hiding. Filling Fangtasia's main room with uncharacteristically happy smiles, were the Vampires of Area Five and hanging from the ceiling was a huge banner which read "Welcome Home Sookie".

Though he knew most of the Vampires in the room were older than the modern tradition of the 'surprise party' he was unexpectedly touched and proud to see them here, ready and eager to give their fealty to their mistress once more.

As Sookie walked in behind him everyone yelled "Surprise!" and even threw confetti. It was Pam though, the obvious organizer of this little get together, who walked up to her first. Eric wasn't sure what to expect but it wasn't Pam throwing herself at Sookie and capturing her sister in a huge hug.

"I missed you!" He heard Pam whisper into Sookie's ear.

Sookie hugged Pam just as hard and then pulled back slightly to meet her eyes.

"Well aren't you sweet." Sookie answered, giving Pam a significant look.

Eric watched as Pam's eyes widened just a fraction. He felt the unspoken question she sent Sookie then, followed by Sookie's almost imperceptible nod in answer. Pam all but choked up as she took an unnecessary gulp of air, ruthlessly suppressing the tear that wanted to break free from the rim of her eye. The overwhelming emotion, from his always stoic child, lasted less than a second before Pam began to laugh, looking at Sookie with even more affection and giving the only acceptable reply to that statement.

"Not especially."

Sookie laughed right back nodding her head, and the two women hugged once more before the other Vampires began to crowd her. Some merely bowed in respect, but the majority of them also volunteered physical contact with hugs and even a cheek kiss or two. It was a wonderful homecoming, or would have been if the door hadn't opened at that moment to reveal a completely unwelcomed guest.

Bill Compton.

He was still Victor's second and by the number of hostile looks and clicks of fangs shooting down, Eric surmised he was also the most despised Vampire in Northern Louisiana. Bill's defection was obviously not yet forgiven or forgotten by more people than just him.

The Vampires closest to the door parted for him but only grudgingly, forcing Bill to push past several of them as he made his way to Eric, Pam, Miriam, and Sookie.

"Pam, forgive my intrusion on your…gathering." Bill started, taking in the whole room with a quick movement of his eyes. "I was in the area and thought I would pick up the financials for Area Five's fourth quarter while I was here. I presume you've finished them by now?" His voice was cool and his face neutral, but Bill's air of disdain for all of them was beyond hiding.

"Of course Bill." Pam own voice dripped sweetness even as she openly sneered at him before turning and heading for her office to get the requested paperwork.

"Eric, I didn't know you were back in Area Five already. I was under the impression you'd be in Oklahoma right now." Bill turned to Eric attempting to appear nonchalant.

"I'm only staying for two nights." Eric answered in a bored tone as though Bill's presence was of less importance to him than the solitary fly buzzing around the room. "I wanted to make sure Sookie was settled in before I returned."

Bill's response was to turn to Sookie then and take her in.

She couldn't help but notice the slight melting of his features as he looked her over and a part of her was sad she couldn't greet him warmly, like an old friend. But she knew better. Even with her memories restored, she would never be able to forgive the way he'd behaved after her turning. It was as though her choosing Eric, as not just her lover but as her Maker, binding herself to him forever, had somehow unhinged her first love that last little bit.

Now she was completely herself again Sookie could see clearly the evidence of his downward spiral. When she'd been Human he'd professed his love as often as he could but he'd also gone about almost systematically destroying his own happiness at every turn as proof he continued to care for her. The way he'd allowed Selah to overhear his confession of continuing passion for her being a prime example.

Now she was forever beyond his reach he seemed to have turned that anger outward. Blaming her, instead of himself, for the demise of their relationship and desiring to destroy her happiness, if she wouldn't find it with him. The way he'd helped Sam. The way he'd run to Victor and traded information about them all for safe haven. Right down to how he'd tried to frighten her into betraying Eric.

"Bill." She said coolly, inclining her head slightly in nothing more than acknowledgement.

"Sookie you look well."

"I am thank you. I had a wonderful time in Europe. It gave me a chance to see new things and appreciate my roots all the same time. I realized a little part of me will always be that small town waitress that served you a glass of wine on your first night at Merlotte's." Sookie saw Bill's hands tighten into fists for a single second before relaxing again and she knew her message was received. He knew she remembered everything now, and hopefully it would mean one less way for him to try and use her against her family and friends.

"That's wonderful Sookie. It sounds like a very eye opening experience." He answered back smoothly. "And now you've returned. You'll be staying in Louisiana then and not returning with Eric to Oklahoma?" He asked glancing sideways at Eric for a moment.

"Yes. It's been so long, I'd like to get the farmhouse up and running again." Despite the tension between the three of them they'd been making what appeared to be civilized chit chat until that point. For no reason Sookie could discern Bill seemed to lose his cool suddenly.

"Oh, I would have thought you were staying so you wouldn't have to see your bonded and former Husband playing house with the Queen of Oklahoma." He snickered as though making a joke.

The whole room went eerily quiet at that, the other Vampires stopping their conversations to stare at him in open hostility. Eric could tell they were waiting for a signal from him. One inclination of his head, one twitch of his jaw and they would attack Bill and the guards he'd brought with him.

It was a win-win situation for Bill actually. Either he got to openly insult Eric and humiliate Sookie publically, or he pushed Eric into starting a fight which would have him declared a traitor to Louisiana: no matter what the personal outcome for Bill.

"Here's the paperwork you wanted." Pam's voice rang through the silent room as she walked from the entryway of the employee area directly up to Bill. "Now, since this party is by invitation only it's time for you to leave." Shoving the large manila envelope into his chest with just enough force to make Bill step backward, Pam stared him down, fangs fully extended.

Bill took the paperwork and nodded his head, his expression still satisfied. Then he and his guards began to walk slowly towards the front door. Bill was halfway through it when he turned around and pinned Sookie with a prevailing glare.

"I did tell you it would happen Sookie. I told you he'd cast you aside the minute something better came along." Having had the last word, Bill left.

The room stayed silent for a few more moments before everyone seemed to, uncomfortably, begin talking at once.

The party lasted for another half hour before the dawn began to call them away. When it was just Eric, Sookie, Pam and Miriam left Eric turned to Pam.

"Compton coming tonight is no coincidence?" It was a question but Eric was already quite sure of the answer. He'd taught Pam everything she knew after all.

"No, I made sure Heidi was the first person I informed of tonight's get together. We wouldn't want the spies to look obsolete or else Victor will recruit new ones. I figured Sookie being back was something they'd find out sooner or later anyway. Let Heidi pass it on and look as though she's still useful to them."

Eric nodded.

"You're present is in the trunk." He said a smirk lifting one corner of his mouth. "Just have my things brought to the house by tomorrow night and make sure you shop for a few things for Sookie too. She had to leave everything behind in Venice." Pam's nod was a match to his own in seriousness, but he could feel her internal excitement at getting to do more shopping. It was like her blood was hopping up and down in his body, doing a little happy dance.

"We'll see you both tomorrow." Were Eric's last words before taking Sookie's hand and leading her outside.

Sookie had just enough time to wave to Pam and Miriam before they were in the air.

As they cut through the sky Eric could feel her contentment radiating through them both, and couldn't help the adoring smile that broke across his face.

"You're happy right now. More so even than when we landed." He spoke in her ear.

"Mmhhm." She answered, holding him a little tighter. "I'd forgotten how much I love flying with you. I still can't do it for myself. I think it passed me by just like it did Pam. It used to irk me a little when I'd try and nothing would happen. But now I'm kinda happy I can't."

"Oh, why is that?" He was genuinely curious. Sookie had always wanted to be able to fly.

"Because then it's something I can only do with you. It's ours and ours alone. You don't fly with all the pretty girls do you?" She asked the last with a teasing little smile on her face.

"_Never_." He answered adamantly. "These arms are only for you."

Sookie laid her head on his chest and he felt her hands rubbing up and down his back.

"Good, because they're the only ones I want."

When they were within minutes of Bon Temps, Sookie felt Eric kiss the top of her head gently.

"Do you want to go straight to the house or do you wish to stop in the cemetery first?"

It was such a sweet thing for him to have thought about, the fact her grandmother would again mean so much to her now her memories had returned. But Sookie could only shake her head.

"The house," she answered, her voice trembling slightly. "I'm…I'm not ready to face Gran yet. I don't know if she'd want to see me." Sookie's voice broke on her last words and Eric's arms tightened around her.

"If any part of her survives, Lover, then she knows you are not to blame for the things you did when you could remember nothing." He spoke soothingly as he put them gently on the ground in front of Sookie's house.

"Maybe…I hope so. But I still can't face her…not yet anyways." Eric nodded. He wouldn't push her. Sookie would find a way to come to terms with it. They all did eventually. It would just take her a little more time.

Sookie gasped as she turned to face the house. She hadn't known what state she would find it in after all these years, but she certainly wasn't expecting this! The whole house looked as though it were brand new and lived in by loving people, all at the same time!

It had been painted a sunny yellow with white trim. The porch railing had been done over and each perfectly white rung looked hand carved and lovingly fashioned. The porch swing was wicker now and seemed untouched, and her Gran's flowers had been cared for meticulously. Even in the February chill she could see every weed had been plucked and every plant covered over to protect it from frost. Feeling tears come to her eyes at the sight, she hugged Eric tightly and buried her head in his chest.

"You didn't have to do all this." She whispered before placing a single kiss on his sternum.

"Of course I did." He answered her as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. "I knew you would return someday, after my marriage was over at the very least. And I never gave up hope you would one day return to yourself as well. When you did I knew you would want to come home. I couldn't let it rot and collapse. It is a part of you.

People used to believe Vampires gained power from resting in the earth of the place they were born. I love going to Norway when I can, but it's changed so much it doesn't really feel like my home anymore. I feel no different when I'm there than I do anywhere else.

But you, even before you were made I could see the strength this place gave you. Your iron will to keep it, your determination to make it as lovely as your means would allow. This place feeds your soul. No matter how long it took for you to return, I would never have let it change. It will stand forever, and forever be _your home_."

What could she possible say that would ever convey her gratitude for such a gift? Sookie knew there was nothing, so instead she simply allowed her love, her gratitude and her adoration for him to flow unfiltered through their bond as she led him up the steps to the door.

Eric opened it with a key on his chain and Sookie took only a moment to see the interior had been as lovingly and painstakingly cared for as the outside. There wasn't a speck of dust or piece of furniture out of place. There were even logs in the fire place, waiting to be lit.

Sensing her train of thought, Eric walked over to the grate and lit the kindling inside, gently prodding it around until the logs caught. When they finally did, he stood once more to find Sookie in front of him, an expectant look on her face.

He remembered the night she'd first risen, how they'd practically torn the house apart in their passion to devour each other. He loved her no less tonight than he had ten years ago. He wanted her no less than he had then either. But as they slowly stripped one another of their clothes it seemed clear to both that everything which happened between them tonight would be gentle. They were being given the chance to remake that night in their memories, to live it again as they should have the first time, with Sookie whole and the entirety of their past as their guide.

The fire was their only light as they lay on the rug before it, entwining their bodies and shutting out the rest of the world. Every kiss was heightened by its heat, ever touch warmed by its rays and when Sookie finally rose above him, straddling his thighs and taking him deep, the fire's light seemed to make a halo around her golden head. As if to prove her divinity, if not to the rest of the world, at least to him.

They moved together for what remained of the night, giving and taking, bringing each other more pleasure than either of them had ever experienced before, until finally Sookie collapsed, as close to exhausted as a Vampire could be. Her head came to rest in the crook of Eric's shoulder, her nose nuzzling his throat, one of the many places she'd bitten him in her passion.

"What do we do now?" She asked him, her thoughts turning morose even as she tried to make herself stop thinking about the imaginary clock which was silently ticking down the hours until he would leave again.

"I will find a way to break this marriage." He said, as though it had already been decided.

"How?" She held him closer.

Nothing would make her happier than to call Eric her husband again, but she wouldn't risk his life or his safety for it. It was only a title in the end. The love they had for each other was what bound them together, what would join them forever.

"I don't know yet." He answered, kissing her head and running his hands up and down her back from the nape of her neck to the enchanting crease where her bottom met her thighs.

Sookie was about to tell him she wanted him to wait. She wanted him to finish out his marriage if that was safest, when Eric's phone suddenly began to ring.

Being closest to it, she grudgingly untangled her limbs from his and reached over for his jeans, pulling the obnoxious interrupter from his pocket and handing it to him.

"Northman." He answered, his tone as gruff and annoyed as she felt.

"Eric. I'm sorry to change your plans but I need you back in Oklahoma by sunrise tomorrow." Came Freyda's voice, sounding enraged and frayed at the edges all at once.

"Why?" Came Eric's worried response, even as he vaulted up to a sitting position, pulling Sookie's kneeling form between his spread legs. "What's happened?"

He could hear Freyda's growl on the other end of the line.

"Felipe finally saw fit to tell me what it is he hoped to gain by our little trip. I need you back here immediately." He knew no matter how they'd parted, this was no ploy to get him to leave Sookie and return to her faster.

"I'll leave at sunset tonight and will see you before the sun rises tomorrow." He answered back solemnly.

With that Freyda disconnected and he and Sookie were left staring at each other blankly.


	25. Chapter 25

_**A/N:**__ Not too much to say. Just a big thank you to everyone who continues to follow this story._

_And major props to my awesome beta __**Northman Maille**__, who's THE BEST!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…._

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The first thing he felt, as he made the journey back to consciousness, was the soft fall of her hair, spread out like golden silk across his chest, tickling his skin. Eric opened his eyes to find Sookie, lying on her side, her beautiful face hidden in the crook of his arm. Her own arm was thrown possessively across his stomach and one leg, bent at the knee, rested over his thigh while her little foot lay wedged between his legs. She was wrapped around him like his own personal Vampire Fairy blanket.

They had rested the day in her bedroom. In the years she'd been gone he had not only taken loving care of her home, preserving it for her, but also made changes that would allow them to sleep there in safety and comfort.

When all this was over, when he had his freedom again, could make her his wife once more, they would live here. He imagined them now, spending endless nights, recreating the simple happiness they'd found when he was cursed. He'd meant every word he'd said to her on those wonderful nights. He would have happily given it all up for her then and he still would, perhaps now more so than ever.

He wanted nothing more than to leave his duties behind, spend a few of their endless centuries together holed up in this little house: doing nothing more than loving each other. After everything they'd been through, and everything he knew they would still have to face, they deserved it.

Kissing the top of Sookie's head, he left her. He retrieved his phone on the way to the kitchen and, as he warmed two True Bloods, he dialed Pam. He could tell she was just coming out of her daytime rest, and wanted to get her before she was distracted by Miriam and their newest pet.

"Eric," Pam yawned into the phone, "Sookie is back now. Why are you calling me at the crack of dusk instead of burying your mouth between Sookie's thighs? I know it's been a decade since you cared about pleasing a woman, but still, you can't have forgotten everything." He never failed to be amused by how irritable she was when she first rose.

"I couldn't resist the opportunity to start my night out by hearing your sweet, adoring voice. Has any maker ever been blessed with such a reverent, respectful child?"

"Something is wrong then, I take it." She asked, still crabby.

"Your powers of perception are all but mystical Pam, truly. How could you possibly have guessed? Our existences are always so quiet and uneventful." He deadpanned.

"I must be coming into new gifts." She snarked back, between more yawns.

"Indeed, you should jump off of Fangtasia's roof tonight and see if you've finally been gifted with flight." He couldn't help but goad her.

The hiss from the other end of the phone was beyond satisfying. Normally he wouldn't poke a grumpy bear, but he felt, after hauling her new wardrobe across an ocean, he was owed a little something in return.

"Was there something you wanted or is this simply a case of no pussy for you no pussy for me?" She asked, the pique clear in her voice.

"Yes and yes." He answered, feeling her exasperation palpably, even from Shreveport. "Freyda called just before dawn this morning, we have a Felipe problem. I need you to send a car and make arrangements for me to fly back to Oklahoma right away."

"It will be there in an hour." She answered back, becoming serious.

"Good. I'm sending Sookie to Shreveport for the time being. Until we know what's going on, I want her with you."

"Of course. Should I send breakfast along in the car?" Eric could hear the smirk in her voice.

Looking with distaste at the two True Bloods he'd warmed, he decided to take Pam up on her offer.

"That would be lovely."

"Only because you brought me Dolce. It's the least I can do…even if you are a dick first thing in the evening."

"Pot and kettle Pam." He chuckled.

"Be careful." She said, after a moment, her voice earnest.

"I always am."

With that he disconnected and made his way back to Sookie's room, bottles of blood in hand. She was just stirring as he set them down and climbed back into bed with her.

"How long do we have?" She asked taking a bottle reluctantly and sipping at it.

The sour expression that crossed her face was just as adorable now as it had been all those years ago, and he couldn't stop himself from taking the bottle out of her hand and placing it back on the nightstand, before climbing on top of her.

"The things you make me feel, Sookie." He breathed softly into her neck, laying little nips all along her throat.

Sookie could only laugh as she wrapped her arms and legs around him. He felt so _good_!

"You're still so soft, and you smell delicious. I wish I could eat you all night." His lips had made their way down to her breasts and he couldn't resist giving each of them a thorough tonging before pulling away. "But Pam is sending a car for us within the hour."

Sookie couldn't help her sigh of disappointment. Nodding her head, she reluctantly crawled out from underneath him, but then had another thought.

"Shower then?" She asked, a hopeful smile lifting the corners of her mouth.

Eric's answering smile was all fangs and leer.

Exactly an hour later they were just finishing dressing, as the car pulled up the drive.

Climbing into the back Eric had to stifle a groan. Apparently he'd poked the grumpy bear a little too hard. Sitting in the middle of the back seat, taking up the majority of it was a bearded, middle aged male fangbanger, dressed in only a pair of nearly bursting leather pants, and wearing a sweaty bandana over his mostly bald head.

"I'm Snake. Ms. Pam sent me for you." He said to Sookie's breasts.

Sookie and Eric looked at each other and Sookie was all but biting her tongue off to keep from laughing.

"You pissed Pam off, I see." She giggled.

"I really should know better by now." He grumbled, attempting to fit himself into the backseat without making any kind of physical contact with their 'breakfast'.

For all of Snake's physical 'charms' he was AB negative, which turned out to be the only thing to save him, especially when he tried to cop a feel of both Sookie's cleavage and Eric's, for the moment, ungracious plenty, as they fed.

After dropping their meal at the first possible place in Shreveport, they made their way to the airport. As they pulled into the Anubis terminal, Sookie slid over and wrapped her arms tight around Eric's neck.

"Call as soon as you can." She whispered before kissing him hard and long.

"I will. Stay close to Pam and be careful." He instructed her, stealing one last kiss before getting out of the car, forcing himself not to turn and look at her one last time. He knew if he looked back he wouldn't be able to leave. From the emotions she was sending him, he knew she felt the same.

He vowed to himself then, whatever this new mess was, it wouldn't sway him from finding a way to end his marriage. He'd felt Sookie's hesitation last night, her worry for his safety. He knew she would be willing to wait for him however long it took. But with Ocella gone, and the threat of his power over them removed, there simply wasn't a single chance Eric would wait another ninety years to have his life back as it should be: he and Sookie together in every way.

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

Freyda's limo was waiting for him when he touched down two hours later.

"Thank you for coming back so quickly." She said as he climbed into the backseat sitting beside her.

"What's going on?" He asked, foregoing the usual pleasantries, not wanting to wait a second longer to find out what happened.

"It appears Felipe has been running his mouth off in front of the wrong people. He's managed to make an enemy of the King of California. It hasn't progressed passed words yet, but Felipe is certain there will be war eventually. He asked us to Venice hoping it would appear, to the right people, as though I supported him and would back him in a fight."

"A direct violation of your agreement with each other when our marriage was made." Eric interjected, his voice carefully neutral.

"Yes, although it hardly matters. One way or the other Felipe may have drawn us into war. If California believes I'll get involved then it's possible he may attack us as a preemptive strike. He's very powerful, as you know, and has many, many allies. Such an outcome would mean certain disaster for Oklahoma." She paused there for a moment, her face taking on an even more sour expression. "And there's more."

"What?" He prompted her softly.

"When Felipe saw how…covetous of your bonded the Doge was, he took the opportunity to try and gain another ally. He has offered Sookie to Marco as a reward for his assistance. It's why he let you both leave so easily. The Duke hasn't given up. He's just… biding his time."

Eric felt himself stiffen internally and it took all his strength to hold back the force of his anger.

"He told you this?" He bit out incredulously, his voice barely more than snarl.

"Oh yes. He was quite eager to tell me. He felt if you…resisted his ruling in this matter, I would be more than happy to step in and help force you to give her over. You're far too valuable to lose Eric. He wouldn't want to end you just to give Marco what he wants and of course, he assumed this would make me happy and therefore more willing too."

"Then why are you telling me this?"

At first Freyda said nothing, only looked down angrily at her pretty turquoise dress, viciously picking at imaginary fabric pills.

"Don't you know why?" She answered quietly, still not looking at him.

His only response was a raised eyebrow.

"If I helped him, what would I gain?" She began, finally raising her eyes to his, pain clearly written across her face. "I might have you physically here with me, and her gone again, but knowing I'd helped him would put your heart further from me than ever. Instead of winning you, it would make you hate me.

I know now you will never feel for me as I feel for you. But I could not bear for you to despise me. Nor will I play Felipe's puppet and put my people in danger in the blind hope that hurting what you love will somehow win me what I desire. I am _not_ a fool, Eric, nor am I a monster. No matter what you do or don't feel for me, you should know that by now."

He did. There were others, many others, who would have taken Felipe's offer without hesitation, if not in the hope of gaining his love then to punish him for his rejection. Instead she proved once again that honor and wisdom were what drove her.

And in doing so, she had won in him an ally for the rest of her existence. No matter what passed between them he would always be loyal to her. Felipe might rule his state, _for the moment_, but Freyda was his Queen.

With a cold kind of clarity, Eric began to realize the answer to both of his problems lay in one simple solution.

"It seems to me," he began cautiously, "the only way any of us will be safe, is for Felipe to meet his final death." Eric's words were barely a whisper but nothing more was needed.

Freyda's head shot up and her eyes widened, her pupils nearly eating her irises, in shock. They were just approaching the palace grounds at that point. Without responding to him, Freyda hit the button for the intercom that connected the back of the limo to the driver's portion of the cabin.

"We're not done yet, Williams. Drive around town for a little longer." She said sternly before taking her finger off the button and looking at him again, her face still stunned. "What are you suggesting Eric?" She asked, her voice equally quiet now.

"I'm suggesting we give Felipe the final death and make you Queen of four states, Majesty." He replied no emotion whatsoever tingeing his voice.

"If you failed, Eric, it would be treason. Felipe wouldn't even bother wasting the time on a trial." She knew he was already aware of this, but she couldn't help reminding him. He wouldn't simply be sentenced to the final death. Felipe would kill him slowly and painfully. The thought made her flinch.

"I will not fail." This time his words held nothing but confidence. "I will make you Queen of Nevada, Louisiana and Arkansas and in return I ask for only one thing."

"And that is?" She asked shakily.

"My freedom."

She'd known of course. She was too smart not to have guessed it before the words were even half out of his mouth. Still it stung. How many other men would have given anything to be with her, if not for love of her then for the power and the position she'd given him? She could have had any one of them at any time, but instead she'd somehow fallen for the one man who would forever be beyond her charms or her affections.

She'd made this marriage to spare her people from Felipe's greed. Now the only way to protect them from his hubris was to give away the husband she'd gained. After centuries on earth she was well acquainted with fate's rather callous sense of humor.

"Very well. You have my word, kill Felipe and keep me out of it, and when I am Queen of his territories I will give you your freedom before witnesses." She said, forcing herself to take on the regal voice she used before her subjects, if only to hide the deep well of desolation her promise created.

Freyda held out her hand to him, to shake on their agreement, but instead Eric took it gently and turned it. He placed a soft kiss on the back before dropping it and pushing the button for the driver.

"We're ready to return to the Palace now." He said, his voice bored, as though they'd been talking about anything but assassinating a fellow Monarch.

"Yes, your Highness." The driver responded before cutting their connection once more.

When they reached the palace Eric got out of the car first and held his hand out to help Freyda from the back. As she stood up beside him, he bent to her ear. To anyone observing them it would have looked as though he were merely kissing the column of her neck.

"Go in, I will join you shortly."

Freyda nodded, giving his hand a hard squeeze before stalking proudly into the palace, head held high.

Once she had gone Eric shot into the sky, not stopping until he was a mile above the ground. Taking out his phone he dialed Pam's cell.

"Sookie says Snake was a big hit." She laughed.

"Hmm yes, he was delightful. For some reason, I find myself suddenly eager for your upcoming birthday. Now, put your sister on the phone." He said, giving a single second, as he waited, to visions of all the lovely ways he intended to pay her back.

"Eric," Sookie's voice came through only a moment later. He could tell she was anxious.

He quickly explained what Freyda told him and what he intended to do in return.

"We can't make open rebellion against Felipe." Sookie said when he'd finished.

"No, you're very right about that. We have neither the time to plan such a thing nor the people. We will need to find a way to lure him unawares, and with as few of his retinue as possible."

There was silence for a long moment, then suddenly he could feel Sookie light on an idea, almost like a bulb going off over her head.

"What if we made him believe we'd discovered someone else plotting rebellion? How many people would he bring to a treason sentencing?" She asked.

"If it were proven beyond the need for a trial, just enough to witness him putting a stake through the traitor's chest. What are you thinking Sookie?"

"Pam has been regaling me with tales of Victor and Bill all evening. It seems neither of them have changed much in the last decade." She began.

"No, you heard Bill last night. They both continue to be thorns in our sides, albeit far more covertly than before. Victor is not dim enough to challenge me outright when I am the King's current favorite, even if Bill shows far less restraint with his tongue than he should." He could see the thread of Sookie's logic quite clearly, and he was pleased her returned memories had not snuffed out her more Vampiric instincts. He had feared she might forgive Compton all his insubordination and underhandedness, now she remembered the brief moment in her life when they'd been lovers. Still, her plan had too many pitfalls. "Sookie in order to frame Victor we would need to know too many things we still do not. He's managed to keep much close to the vest despite the number of spies I have surrounding him."

"I know. We'd need to have someone close to him give up everything they know about his strengths, his weaknesses, how many of his people are truly loyal and how many would change sides if given the opportunity. We'd need someone like…Bill." Her voice had taken on a shaky quality at the end, but Eric could tell it had nothing to do with the idea of using her former lover.

"Bill might still want you for his own Sookie, but I doubt even he's witless enough to give up that kind of information, even for a price." _And I wouldn't allow you to touch that sick fuck for all the tea in China_, he added silently, not quite willing to start that particular argument…yet.

He knew quite well how Sookie would react to his forbidding her to do anything. He still would though if it came down to it. He was not his Maker. The thought of allowing Sookie to trade herself for anything, even coveted information, was sickening to him. And he had no doubt it would take nothing less than an offer of Sookie's body to get Bill to give up what he knew…maybe not even then.

Bill was a coward and a turncoat but he wasn't a complete idiot. He knew there was no going back, no atoning for what he'd done a decade ago. He would never be safe from Eric with Victor out of the way.

"Calm down Eric. I have no intention of even suggesting what you're thinking." Sookie's voice had an adamancy to it which immediately quelled his worry.

"Then what _are_ you suggesting?" He asked.

The other end of the phone was silent for a long moment, and Eric felt Sookie's fear suddenly rear up within her and then be ruthlessly pushed back down. By the time she spoke again he felt that, now familiar, wall of determination squashing down any other emotion.

"That night in Baden, I found more than my memories. I felt it Eric, my telepathy, it's there too. I…when I was Human, sometimes, I used to catch snippets of Vampire thoughts. It only ever happened a few times, but it felt like… cold snakes slithering around my brain.

In Baden, when my shields fell back all the way, there was a minute where it felt like everyone was screaming at me at once and I felt like there were hundreds of _things_ crawling all over me. I didn't understand it at the time, but now I remember, it felt just like the snakes. I was hearing the Vampires in the room too, I just didn't know it.

I haven't tried again to push my shields all the way back, but…but I could. And I think if I did, I'd be able to hear anyone. I wouldn't have to offer Bill anything, I wouldn't even have ask him much of anything, all I'd have to do is sit with him and open my mind, and I could find out what we need."

Her words were shocking and Eric almost jumped on them without thinking first, but the fear she felt, it didn't make sense. Sookie had always hated her telepathy because it gave her no peace, but it had never frightened her. Now it seemed as though it had become the perfect gift, she could listen when she wanted to and effortlessly block it out when she didn't. Why then was she purposefully keeping it blocked off?

"There's something you're not telling me. What is it Sookie? Why haven't you used your gift again?" His voice was gentle as he pushed calm, love and acceptance to her.

"I'm afraid." She answered, sounding angry at herself for the emotion.

He had seen it in the few nights they'd been together again. Perhaps it had been her lack of memories through her Vampire existence, or perhaps it had been Ocella's gift to her, the total extinguishment of such a worthless and inhibiting emotion, but he knew fear was something she was no longer familiar with.

"Of what Lover?" He asked softly.

"If I pull them back up wrong, I might forget everything again? I don't want to forget my life again. I don't want to be a monster again and I _can't _forget you again. Loving you is the only thing that makes me…human anymore."

Eric felt his gut twist at her simple admission. How often, in the beginning, had he felt the same way? Of course, in the very beginning, when he'd felt loving Sookie made him Human, the thought had often been accompanied by distaste and anxiety. But by now, he'd long understood their love for each other to be the great gift it was. He wouldn't let her lose herself, or him, again…he couldn't.

"I won't allow any of that to happen love. I promise." The certainty in his voice seemed to calm her somewhat. "What if you and I practiced beforehand, so you could get used to pulling your shields in and pushing them back out?" He offered after a moment, a thought striking him. "With just the two of us there wouldn't be a deafening roar of voices, you could get used to it slowly. And if you explain to me what it feels like to use your shields, I could use my Maker's command to help you push them back if you pulled them up too far. When you can do it with ease, we can practice with more people."

"You'd let me read your mind? You aren't angry?" She seemed genuinely surprised by his offer.

"I have never had anything to hide from you Sookie. You might not like everything you hear, I have done many things you may find repellant, but you are my bonded _and _my child. There is nothing of me I am unwilling to share with you."

"I love you so much, Eric. You've always accepted all of me haven't you? There isn't anything I could hear that would make me love you any less."

"Then I will speak with Freyda and hope to be home again tomorrow. I'm looking forward to our practice sessions lover, there are a good many things I would love for you to 'hear'."

The leer in his voice was unmistakable and Sookie found herself laughing, despite her trepidation over what they'd just decided.

"What's my rule about dirty talk?" She teasingly reproved him.

"I'm well aware of how you feel about dirty words, Lover. But I don't believe we've ever established a rule on vivid, filthy thoughts and I promise you, after tomorrow night, you won't want to!"


	26. Chapter 26

_**A/N:**__ Just wanted to say thank you, as always, to everyone who's been following this story._

_And to my awesome beta, __**Northman Maille**__! You rock my socks!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…._

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

Even in the middle of a crowded airport, Eric was unmistakable.

His height alone made it easy to pick him out of the sea of lesser beings. The fact his beauty shone out like a beacon didn't hurt either. As Sookie made her way to him, weaving effortlessly through the clusters of travelers and their loved ones, she chided herself that she had somehow forgotten the kind reactions he inspired. The Humans, and even the other Vampires around them, all seemed to stop what they were doing just to shamelessly stare at him.

She laughed to herself that she would have to remember not to walk behind him after they'd made their way to each other. Despite all her Vampiric grace, Sookie was afraid she would slip in the puddle of drool left in his wake.

Even with her more diminutive stature, Eric's eyes found her almost as quickly and, after picking up his bag from the turntable, he strode over to meet her halfway. His face was carefully expressionless, set in the stern, emotionless lines he always wore in public, but their bond said it all. Even though they'd only been separated again for a single night, he was ecstatic to see her, desperate to get her away from all these curious eyes and have her completely to himself. Sookie was only too happy to reflect his emotions right back to him.

"Lover." He breathed, his voice low enough no one else would be able to hear, as he used his free hand to grip the back of her head. Hauling her to him and bending, all in one graceful motion, Eric kissed her hard, uncaring of the watching crowd.

Sookie kissed him back with equal fervor but when they pulled apart she couldn't help but laugh again. At Eric's raised eyebrow, she shook her head.

"You don't have to be a telepath to tell what all these people are thinking." She giggled quietly. "Anubis baggage claim just went from smelling like industrial cleaner and recycled air to smelling like pure lust. I think pretty much all of the women, and most of the men, wish they were me right now."

Eric gave a little laugh of his own. It wasn't lost on her that he pulled her close, fusing her side to his as they walked, in a show of obvious possession.

"I think you have it wrong, Love. They're all deeply jealous of me. Not only am I the best looking man in the airport," he paused to let Sookie snicker at his arrogance, "but I have the most beautiful woman in all of Louisiana by my side. Trust me, they want to _be_ me, so they can_ have_ you. At the very least they wish they could be a fly on our wall."

His words got an indulgent eye roll from her, and it was exactly what he'd hoped for. He knew she was worried about what they were going to attempt, and he wanted to give her a moment of lightheartedness before they had to be serious again.

Sookie had brought the Corvette. After stowing his bag in the trunk, Eric took the wheel, guiding the car out of the airport complex and onto the highway. He could feel Sookie's curiosity as she realized they were driving in the opposite direction from their home, but she said nothing.

An hour later they pulled off the highway onto a secondary road. A half hour after that Eric pulled the Vette off the paved roads entirely and onto a desolate looking dirt path.

"What is this place?" She asked as they came up on a small log cabin nestled in a clearing.

"An alternate resting place if ever we have the need for one," he answered her, putting the car in park just in front of a little porch. "The neighbors are too close in Shreveport. Here, there'll be no one for miles except you and me."

"Thank you." She said softly, feeling scared and grateful all at once, as she put her hand over his on the gearshift and squeezed a little.

"You don't have to do this at all, if you don't want to Sookie. We can find another way." He offered, killing the engine and turning to face her.

"Yes I do." Her voice firm. "We don't have all the time in the world, we need to get rid of Felipe and Victor…and Bill as fast as possible. This is the easiest way to do it."

Eric only nodded his head. He could feel her determination and he knew better than to argue with her. Whether they used her gift to bring down Felipe and Victor or not, he wanted her to learn to control her telepathy again, if only so she wouldn't dread it. It was a part of her, something to add to her arsenal of self-defense, not an enemy to be locked away because of her fear it might destroy her.

As they entered, he watched Sookie take in the little house. It was smaller than his Shreveport home, one large, open space that encompassed the kitchen, living room and an office area, with a small loft serving as a bedroom. The water table here was genuinely too high for an underground chamber, but the windows all had automatic, light proof shutters and, despite its humble exterior, it was well secured. The fridge was stocked with enough True Blood and Royalty blended that they could easily stay here for months if they had to.

Leading her over to the deep blue, semi-circular couch which faced a marble fireplace, Eric set about lighting the logs. It was a silly thing, a remnant of his first centuries of life really, but it always comforted and calmed him to see the beautiful yellow and blue flames, and right now he wanted Sookie to feel the same.

Once the fire was roaring he sat next to her, pulling her close and laying a kiss to the top of her head as she snuggled against him, her face nuzzled into his chest.

"Tell me how it works." He started.

Sookie was silent for a few moments. Eric could feel her thinking hard, trying to put into words something she barely understood.

"My shields are permanent now." She began. "They can expand or contract but I don't think I can lower or dismantle them anymore. When I pull them back, it's like tensing a muscle and it takes a great deal of effort, but once I have them at a certain place I can let it go and it will stay put.

In Baden they fell back a little on their own, and when they snapped back they snapped back to the moment I woke as a Vampire. I don't know if that's sort of their…"she struggled to find the right words, "…default setting, or if it's possible to pull them out further, but that's what I'm afraid of…. If they pulled out too far they would take all of my memories again. What if they pulled out even further, could they take other parts of my brain too? I'm terrified I could end up a Vampire vegetable, unable to think or move or talk or _anything_."

"Can you pull them back now slowly, so I can feel what it's like for you?" He asked softly, tightening his arms around her, sending her comfort through their bond, as he tried to make her feel physically safe.

Sookie nodded and pulled away to sit up. Staring in the direction of the flames, she breathed in deeply a few times, trying to center herself, and then closed her eyes. He could see a small crease form between her eyebrows from the strain.

Eric felt the exact moment Sookie was able to access the blocked part of her mind and her gift. It was as if her presence in his blood expanded, and then he knew she was there with him, in his head.

"_Lover, can you hear me?_" He thought.

"_Yes_." She said, without words. Her hand flew out, grabbing his and he watched as it trembled in his grasp.

"What do you see?" He asked out loud a moment later.

"_Everything!_" She responded, again his head.

He wasn't sure exactly what everything meant but he let her sift through his head, putting up no resistance. Beyond the knowledge of her presence, something they would have to test on someone else linked to her by blood, he was completely unable to detect what she was doing, seeing or hearing.

A few silent moments later she opened her eyes once again, and he felt her pull away from his head.

"Tell me?" He asked gently, bringing her back into the shelter of his arms.

"I saw everything Eric. Not just the random thoughts you were having at the time. I saw your life, your turning, your travels with Ocella. I saw Pam as a Human. I saw the last decade without me ...everything. It's like a movie playing in fast forward. Now that I'm not really trying I'm still getting your thoughts, just like I did with Humans, like a radio playing in the background."

"Can you make sense of what you see while you're looking at it?" He pressed.

Sookie grimaced, as though she were trying to figure out the answer.

"The images yes, but the emotions attached…only the stronger ones.

I could feel your grief and your helplessness at watching your wife and son die, and knowing you couldn't do anything to help them." She stopped there, worried he might be angry for having unwittingly shared something so deeply personal, but his face was completely neutral. "I could feel your fear the night Ocella attacked you, your bloodlust the night you rose and killed for the first time. I felt your…interest," she looked over at him then, to see if she'd chosen the right label for that particular emotion, "the first moment you saw Pam.

But if there were other emotions underneath, I don't know. I would have to think about it more now that I'm done looking." She said it all slowly as though she were trying to make sense of it still even as she was replaying it in her head.

"_That's amazing, Love, truly amazing!" _He sent her. "_Have you pushed your shield back out yet_?"

She only shook her head in response.

"_Do you hear anyone besides me_?"

"No. I don't know how far out I can hear, but there's no one anywhere near us." She answered.

"Are you ready to put your shields back around your telepathy?" He rubbed a hand soothingly up and down her arm and kissed her cheek as he asked, letting her feel his pride and confidence in her.

"Yes." She answered closing her eyes once more. He saw the crease form between her brows again and felt the sensation of her pushing the barrier back out slowly.

When she opened them again she looked at him with a tentative smile.

"It worked." She said, a small bloom of confidence lighting within her.

"Good!" He said, kissing her mouth, hard this time. "Let's try again, until you can do it easily and quickly."

This time when she contracted her shields he was ready for her and the sight which greeted her had her gasping with shock. He knew if she were still capable of it, she'd be blushing from the roots of her hair to the tips of her toes.

"Is that even possible?" She asked, one eyebrow arching high on her head, even as her fangs ran down involuntarily.

"Shall we find out?" He chuckled, a leer lifting the corners of his mouth. "After all, you will need to be able to do this while distracted and under… duress."

"So this is all in service of the plan, huh?" She sassed, watching him through slitted eyes as he inched slowly closer, like a lion preparing to pounce on its next meal.

"Mmm, of course Lover," he growled low, the sound vibrating in his chest, as his tongue darted out and licked the column of her throat, from the non-existent pulse below her ear to the spot where her neck met her shoulder. "I'm very committed to making sure you're prepared for anything."

Sookie's first response was an excited shiver.

"Something tells me if anybody else put me under this kind of 'duress', you wouldn't let them live very long."

"Without doubt," he snarled a little at the thought, "but then if you can handle me, you can handle anything." With that his fangs pierced her throat and his body lunged, pushing her underneath him.

"Unhh, _Eriiicc_!" She let out a low moan and his name echoed as she spoke the word aloud and in his head at the same time.

"What am I thinking now lover?" He asked, one hand grabbing at her hair, holding her head at the perfect angle for him to drink and the other reaching under her top to fondle all of her smooth, soft skin.

"You're thinking about all the different ways you could fuck me on this couch." She answered, astonishment in her voice as her hands came up to grab greedily at his jeans encased ass. "I don't know if you're extremely creative or just really perverted." She gasped out, the sound somewhere between a question and a moan.

"Oh both, I assure you." He answered back, pulling the lace that 'cruelly' imprisoned her breast down so his fingers could tease her nipple.

Seeing the images in his head, the two of them writhing together in the most unimaginably depraved positions, Sookie forgot about everything else but getting him naked and inside her.

Taking her hands from his bottom she moved them to the waist of his jeans and pushed the offending fabric down with all of her might, until she heard the button pop from the strain. Eric growled low once again, finally withdrawing his fangs from her neck and making quick work of removing her top.

As they wrestled with each other's clothes, his voice was a constant litany of filthy praise inside her head. He showed her exactly how much he loved her body, let her feel his lust for her, his pleasure at every new inch of skin that was revealed. Until they were both naked and panting with need.

"Which one did you like best?" He asked aloud when they were finally bare, his cock straining towards her, telling her even better than the images and words in his head, how much it wanted to be buried deep inside her.

"This one!" She answered.

She pushed him until he was lying on his back, his legs spread wide and bent at the knee, and then climbed on top of him. Impaling herself in one hard plunge she leaned all the way back, bracing her hands behind her and putting her feet on his shoulders.

In this position he was utterly at her mercy, her feet pinning him to the couch and her hands giving her the leverage to slide up and down on his pulsing erection.

"Fuck!" He roared, his head falling back as his hands reached out blindly and gripped her thighs roughly.

"_Mhhmm, you feel so fucking good_!" Her voice echoed in his head, while her mouth made incoherent snarls and growls of pleasure.

"_So do you. So do you, Lover_." He answered back the same way. "_Fuck me harder Sookie!"_

She obeyed without thought, riding him rough and fast, but it wasn't enough, he needed to be deeper, he wanted to plunge harder. Using his heightened speed, he bolted out from underneath her, turning her at the same time, until she was on her hands and knees in front of him.

Pushing back into her tight wetness he brought one hand to her hips, moving her on his cock, making every thrust deeper as he braced the other on the couch in front of her head, molding his chest to her back.

"What am I thinking lover, tell me?" He gritted out even as his fangs began to graze the back of her shoulders.

"Huh?" came Sookie's dazed reply, too gone in her pleasure to make any other answer.

"Tell me, what am I thinking?" He asked again, emphasizing every word with a hard lunge of his hips.

"You…you love me!" She cried out, her orgasm taking her as he sunk his fangs into her skin once more.

Eric followed with hoarse cry of his own, as he thrust hard twice more and spilled deep within her. He'd barely finished emptying into her when she went from her hands to her elbows, detaching his fangs from her skin and then turning.

Pushing him again, she tussled them until he was sitting back against the couch. Then she straddled him once more, sitting back down on his still stiff cock and gripping his hair in her hands, pulling his neck taught for her own bite.

"All this mind reading is making me hungry." She growled playfully before striking at the vein under his ear.

The pain of her bite brought him back from his orgasmic haze and he began to thrust up into her as she fed, gripping her hips to keep her still as he fucked her from below. It only took a minute or two for them both to come again, screaming and crying in pleasure.

When they both came back down from their high, they sat there, wrapped in each other's arms for a long time, just staring at the fire. Completely forgetting Sookie's shields were still at their smallest, he let his mind wander, and was startled when she pulled away from him abruptly, a look of completely disbelief painting her face.

"What is it?" He asked, suddenly brought from his thoughts by her expression.

"I heard you. You really meant it!" She said, sounding as though she still couldn't believe whatever it was she'd caught from his mind.

"Meant what?" He still wasn't sure what she could have heard rattling around in his head that had shocked her so. He hadn't been thinking much of anything, besides how blissfully satisfied he felt at the moment.

"That I'm the best." She sounded a little shyer now, as she looked away from him, her eyes settling instead on his chest. When she spoke again her voice was barely above a whisper. "That _we're_ best. I always thought you were flattering me."

This time it was Eric who looked incredulous. Lifting her chin gently with his fingers he locked eyes with her, before saying a thing.

"I'm not a flatterer Sookie. You and I together, we _are_ right. We _are_ best. Do you think I fall in love with all of the beautiful women I bed? Do you think I bond with them, trick them into marrying me, turn them, spend years yearning for them, fight rebellions, commit treason for them?

What we have…do you think one in a million, one in a billion people ever get to feel this? If you do you're wrong. Lifetimes can pass without two people ever finding what we have. I told you once and I meant it. If what we have isn't true love then it does not exist!

Do not ever doubt how I love you, how I need you, or how I want you again. What we are about to do, you cannot doubt me, doubt us, if we are to succeed. You cannot doubt it is worth any price. _Do you hear me_!" The last he said in her head, his thoughts filled with even more conviction than his voice had been.

"I promise, Eric." Her own was soft, almost meek, as she was overcome by the strength of his emotions.

They were there in the bond, and traveling across to her in her head too. Sookie felt as though she were almost drowning in his love. If it were truly possible to do so, she would have… happily. In all her life as a telepath no one had ever filled her head with so much light, so much love, the way Eric was doing now. It was beautiful and it warmed her from the inside.

"May I try something?" He asked her after a few moments of silence.

Sookie only raised her eyebrow in counter question.

"I want to see if my command will work on your telepathy. We cannot practice anywhere with many people if the command will not work. I will not risk losing you again.

You said last night you couldn't bear to forget again." He paused for a moment, looking away from her, but then turned back, determined not to be shamed by his emotions even if there was weakness there. "I couldn't bear it either. It nearly broke me the first time, and while I know now I will love you no matter what form you take, I never want to be without _all_ of you again!"

"Okay." Her voice was small but sure as she prepared to turn her telepathy over to him, to trust him with what could be her greatest strength or her most crippling vulnerability.

"Sookie, I command you, push your shields back out _only_ far enough to encompass your telepathy."

Sookie's response was instantaneous and completely involuntary. Without any effort from her, her shields snapped back into place exactly as they'd been told to.

Gasping as she felt them expand, she grasped her head and winced in pain. Through their bond, Eric felt it, a stabbing sensation reminding him most of an ice pick to the head. It was sharp but thankfully brief. It seemed her telepathy would respond to him like the rest of her body, but not without repercussion.

"Are you alright?" He asked, taking her hands from her head and replacing them with his own, rubbing soothing circles over her temples.

"Yes. It's alright, it's fading already." She reassured him after a moment. "It'll work, Eric. I can do it and if something happens you can pull me back." Her voice was hopeful.

"We must still practice though. You need to be able to do it without me. If something should happen, if we're separated again, I need you to be able to control it yourself. You know the world we live in. Your telepathy could be your most valuable asset, but only if the danger of your shields, is taken away.

It's nearly dawn. Let's rest now and tomorrow we'll try again at Fangtasia."

Before she could respond, Eric stood, taking her with him, since she'd never left the shelter of his lap. He carried her over to the window shutters, checking to make sure they had all come down, and to the door to make sure the cabin's security system was set, before climbing the stairs to the loft and laying her gently on the bed.

Climbing in with her, Eric wrapped his arms around Sookie, pulling her close.

"Did you really see everything?" He asked her, even as she yawned into his shoulder.

"I think so." She answered sleepily. "You've had an amazing life, been so many places, seen so many things, it's extraordinary."

"It was lonely." He answered her softly. "Only I didn't realize how much until the night I met you."

"Mine was the same." She whispered, looking up at him, fighting the pull of dawn for each second more. "You're the only person in my life who ever made me feel not alone. I love you." Sookie said the last just as the pull of the sun finally won out, and her head dropped onto his chest, her mouth still slightly parted.

"And I you." Eric responded, even though she could no longer hear him.


	27. Chapter 27

_**A/N:**__ Just wanted to say a quick thank you to my betalicious beta, __**Northman Maille**__, for all of her hard work and especially for her friendship! You are the best, I luv ya!_

_And of course thank you to everyone who continues to follow this story. We're nearing the end now, not more than five more chapters (I think) so thank you for sticking with it!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…._

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

Sookie shivered a bit when they walked into Fangtasia the next night. The temperature might not affect her any longer, but looking at the packed bar and thinking of lowering her shields in it, made her fearful.

She bristled at the thought of being afraid of something which was part of her, and she allowed her irritation to turn into anger.

Anger, Ocella taught her, could have its uses. While one should never let such a volatile emotion master you, if you allowed it, it could give you focus, help you center yourself for battle, sharpen the senses, and push anxiety over the outcome down and away. Sookie had never backed down from a fight in her decade as a Vampire and she wouldn't now; even if this time, the enemy was her own mind.

Squaring her shoulders determinedly and holding her head high, she strode in and made her way to the center table. Eric was just a few steps behind her, having stopped at the front door to speak with Pam and Sookie smiled as she saw Miriam was already sitting there, giving a fangy sneer to one of the patrons.

"You're good at that." Sookie chuckled, whispering too low for the Humans to hear, as she sat next to her sister's child. "And you were such a sweet thing the last time I saw you."

Miriam just shrugged, smiling bashfully at her.

"I know, Pam's such a bad influence. She has me calling them Vermin even when she's not around. To be honest though…I still feel like one most of the time, a Human I mean. Well except at mealtimes and bedtime. Is it the same for you?"

Sookie's face remained blank but Miriam's question hit her rather harder than she would have expected. It made sense for her to ask, they were slightly less than a year apart in Vampire years and they were very close in Human age as well, Miriam coming out the younger one by just a bit all the way around. But their experiences had been as different as, well…night and day.

Sookie realized, for the first time, she didn't feel even slightly Human anymore. Even with her memories returned, she'd lived knowing nothing but being a Vampire for eleven years, and it had become normal to her. She figured she'd gotten something of a jump start, but that this was how older Vampires must feel too. They were so used to being like this it was hard to remember what being hungry, being chilly, sweating, or needing to breathe felt like.

But what startled Sookie more than anything, was the realization she didn't long to have those feelings back. She remembered quite clearly looking down at her cup of coffee, on her last day as a Human, and worrying she would miss drinking it so much when she made this change. She didn't. She hadn't thought of coffee at all in over a decade, or pecan pie, or fried chicken, or anything else and even now when she was, she didn't miss them.

Eric had been right. She'd fought it for so long, denied and at times even been repulsed by the insinuation, but she was perfectly suited to this life. He'd known all along, but now she knew too. This is what she was meant to be and, as he made his way through the throng of tourists and fangbangers to her side, she knew he was one she was meant to be with.

It would be so easy to say things would be perfect once Felipe was out of the way, or Bill, or Victor. It would be so easy to say things would be perfect when Eric was finally free of Freyda. But the truth, the truth she'd always known, was there would always be someone or something to challenge them. Life would never be an eternal vacation or an immortal's playground, but as she'd hoped, on the day she made the decision to join him in this life, any challenge was worth it to be with him… and with Pam and Miriam too.

Looking over at her friend, realizing she had yet to give her an answer, Sookie took a moment to make peace with the past ten years. Miriam might very well have not been sitting beside her tonight if she and Eric had not gone through what they had. Though she would always bear some resentment towards his dead Maker, she could say, sitting here now, it had been worth it. For Miriam to be here, a Vampire who still seemed to enjoy the Humans, it had been worth it.

"No." She finally answered. "I don't anymore, but if you do, enjoy it."

Despite the fact Sookie was sure she was the only telepath in the room, the way Miriam nodded her head made Sookie think she'd surmised much same thing, in the moment or two she'd been waiting for an answer.

"Are you ready?" Eric asked, taking the seat across the table from them.

"As I'll ever be." Sookie answered, taking one of those unnecessary breaths for courage.

"Slowly, Lover." Eric said, as he watched her close her eyes briefly to center herself.

They'd practiced a little more at the cabin before coming to the bar and Sookie was getting faster at raising and lowering her shields correctly. She was also getting better at masking the concentration it took to do so. That would be almost as important when the time came. There would be no point to any of it, if Compton or anyone else, suspected she was up to something.

A moment later Eric felt the telltale tingle of Sookie at the corner of his mind. It only lasted a second though, before Sookie's eyes went wide and she grabbed her head in pain. He felt it in his blood as well, an emotion which was like the anxiousness one felt when they heard sirens getting louder, or going off suddenly close by.

"Sookie!" He said, standing, nearly lunging over the table to her.

He was too late though. By the time he had his hands on her she'd already thrown her shields back up in panic.

He felt her leave his mind as though a door slammed shut, and she seemed to relax a bit. For a split second Eric thought she'd been able to push her shields out successfully. Instead when Sookie finally looked up, her chest rising and falling with completely unnecessary breaths, Eric knew her worries had been justified.

"Eric?" She said sounding confused.

"Sookie." He answered softly, hoping not to scare her.

She obviously knew who he was. That was a plus. He was just about to use his Maker's command to help her pull back her shields when she wrenched herself from his embrace.

"What the heck am I doing here?" She asked, looking around the bar with a puzzled expression. He noticed right away her accent, which had become much less obvious in the years since she'd been turned, was markedly more pronounced all of the sudden.

"You were attempting to read the patrons." He answered cautiously again.

Sookie made a grimace as her eyes scanned the bar once more.

"That's odd. I don't remember coming here tonight at all. Well, if I'm here then where's Bill?" She pinned him with one of the withering looks she used to refer to as 'the hairy eyeball'.

"Bill?" Eric knew he should simply give the command but he did not.

He took no perverse pleasure in seeing his love so confused and unlike herself, but if she were going to use her telepathy, Sookie would need to know what all the possibilities where.

"Bill?" It was Pam this time.

She'd sidled up to them, having given door duty over entirely to their bouncer. Eric spared a brief glance at her, and then settled his gaze back on Sookie…who was staring at Pam with another look of consternation.

"Yeah, Bill." Sookie said, the 'well duh' implied in her voice. "My boyfriend…you know you're not allowed to use my disability without him being here. We already hashed all this out!" Sookie was getting worked up as she spoke and when she got to the last part her fangs popped out without her permission.

She gasped, clapping a hand over her mouth and staring down incredulously as though she were actually trying to see them, her eyes all but crossing from the strain.

"Oh god." Pam said under her breath. "How is this possible?" They were attracting the attention of the Humans at this point. The vermin gawking in open curiosity, though they couldn't possibly understand what they were seeing.

"All the noise overwhelmed her and she put her shields up too fast. It seems they've…inverted." He answered, struggling to make sense of it himself. "I think she doesn't know anything which has happened after a certain point this time."

As he spoke, Sookie began to inch backwards, away from the table.

"Jesus Christ Shepherd of Judea!" She squeaked, her words carrying a pronounced lisp as she tried to speak around her fangs. "Oh God, what's happened?" Looking at Eric again she seemed to realize something fundamental just then. Her eyes went even wider then filling up with fear. "What have _you_ done to me?" She screeched, turning, attempting to flee.

"Pam, keep an eye on things." Eric said before taking off after her.

With her few seconds head start Sookie managed to make it out the back entrance to the employee parking lot, but no further. Using his superior speed Eric managed to get in front of her and held out his arms. Sookie didn't even see him before his hands took her shoulders and halted her, less than a centimeter from crashing into his chest.

"Let me go!" She screamed, struggling against him. "Let me go. You…you monster! Bill was right." She yelled as blood tears began to slide down her cheeks. "He warned me you were evil. He told me you'd do anything to have my telepathy at your beck and call. But I never thought you'd sink this low, you SICK FUCK!"

Eric stood perfectly motionless as she screamed at him. When she'd yelled out her fury she seemed to give up fighting him, realizing she couldn't break free of his embrace.

"Sookie, please," he said when she seemed marginally more calm, "I will not harm you. I know you are confused right now, but I swear to you, you are in no danger. I have not turned you against your will. I need to know one thing and then I will help you in whatever way you wish." He tried to keep his voice neutral, without even a hint of emotion, but it was hard.

He had no reason to suspect it wouldn't, but he still found himself afraid. If his Maker's command somehow failed, he would lose her again. And this time it might be even worse since she seemed to have snapped back to a time when they hardly knew each other, a time when she still loved Compton and believed his lies.

"Why should I tell you anything!" She spit out venomously. "I want Bill. Where's Bill?"

She looked around again as though she expected Compton to burst into the parking lot at any moment, her knight in shining armor come to save her. It was like a knife through Eric's heart and he found himself having to bite back the words trying to escape his lips at her behavior. He knew she couldn't help it, but he still wanted to tell her Bill had never been her savior. It had always been him…always, because he was the one who loved her truly.

"I will call Bill, but only if you answer my question." He said, his voice a little more stern, playing the villain since she seemed to expect it of him. If it meant getting what he needed so he could end this… he would do just about anything.

"And you'll let me go home with him?" She asked, her voice a little more steady, even though he could sense she was wary of trusting his word.

"Yes."

Sookie nodded her head.

"When is the last time you remember seeing me Sookie?"

His question had her raising her own eyebrow and looking at him as though he were a dolt.

"I saw you two nights ago." When he made no response to her she huffed a little and finally supplied what he needed. "I came into to read your accountant Bruce…." She looked at him as though she hoped that would jog _his _memory. "And ended up nearly being killed by that creep Longshadow….. Is any of this ringing bells for you, or do you stake a different minion every night?"

"Yes, it does. Thank you." He said stonily. "Sookie…."

She looked up at him, her expression angry and scared all at once.

"Yeah?"

"As your Maker I command you to pull your shields out only far enough to encompass your telepathy." There was a single moment when Eric's fear seemed to spike, but a second later Sookie's arms went around his middle and her face buried itself in his chest.

"Oh God, I'm sorry!" She said, her voice small, even as her body shook with the force of her tears.

Eric tightened his arms around her and brought his mouth to the top of her head, kissing her and breathing her in all at once. She was back with him. She hadn't left him again. He would be able to pull her back. He would always be able to pull her back!

"Do not apologize love. I could feel how scared you were. How far could you hear when you pulled your shields back?" He asked after a moment when he felt she was under control again.

"I don't know exactly, but several miles. I could hear people on the highway in their cars, people in their homes putting their kids to bed. The closer they were the louder they were and it was like everyone was shouting in my head. That and the Vampire's minds, feeling like they were slithering all over me, it was just too much. I'm sorry. I was so worried something like this would happen, and I let it get the better of me anyway."

Eric kissed her forehead again and rubbed up and down her back soothingly.

"We can work up to this again at some point," he began, "but for now I think it best that you meet Compton in a secluded place."

Sookie could only agree as they turned and walked back into the bar. Eric guided them into his office this time, and they found Pam and Miriam waiting for them.

"Sookie are you alright?" Pam asked, her voice filled with concern, though it had abated just slightly when she saw how Sookie was now sheltering in their Maker's embrace, rather than fighting it.

"I am." She answered, sounding embarrassed. "I'm just…God, I'm sorry." She said again.

"Don't be Sookie." Eric said firmly, finally detaching from her and coming to lean against the edge of his desk. "As negative as the experience was, it was not without benefit." His voice was pragmatic now, and it helped them all dial down the emotion practically flooding the room.

"Oh…what's that?" Sookie countered, her tone dripping in weary sarcasm.

"We know now that even if your shields expand outwards farther than they should, they don't seem to upset your ability to function. They appear to be limited to your memory and telepathy, and don't affect the parts of your brain which control the use of your body. It seems unlikely that even a serious mistake would turn you into, as you so eloquently put it, a Vampire vegetable."

Sookie seemed sufficiently mollified by his statement, and Eric could feel her make a little mental sigh of relief.

"At least there's that." She replied softly after a few moments.

"Pam, Miriam, could either of you feel Sookie inside your head when she used her telepathy?"

Pam and Miriam both looked at each other blankly for a moment and then shook their heads.

"Good, thank you. Why don't you both head back out to the bar." Eric said, never taking his eyes from Sookie. When they'd gone he walked back to her and put his arms around her once more.

"You will get control of this Sookie. I promise. For now though, if you still want to do this…?" He trailed off, his question obvious.

"I do." She stated firmly.

"Then I think you should meet Compton at the farmhouse. It's the only other place isolated enough."

The thought of having Bill back in her home was extremely distasteful, but Sookie knew Eric was right. Nodding she squeezed him one last time and then walked over to his desk, flipping through his rolodex until she found Bill's number in New Orleans.

"You know this thing is horribly outdated." She said, pointing to the rolodex as she picked up the phone.

Eric only shrugged.

"I have all the numbers in my cell too, I just…like the way it spins." He grinned at the stupidity of his justification, feeling a little dig at his expense was worth it to see her smile after tonight's shock.

Her face suddenly became serious again as Eric heard Bill answer his phone.

"Eric, what can I do for you tonight?" Bill's voice came over the line loud and clear, his annoyance at his presumed caller evident.

"It's not Eric." Sookie said, her own sounding small and uncertain.

If it hadn't been for the dark, predatory look on her face, Eric would have thought she was genuinely feeling timid. With a flash of certainty Eric knew this is what Sookie sounded like when she'd been luring Merlotte to his death.

"Sookie?" Bill said, his voice changing from annoyed to curious all in one syllable.

"Yeah Bill…it's me."

"Why are you calling?" There was an edge to Compton's voice then, as though he couldn't believe she was talking to him willingly. Apparently his survival instincts weren't completely broken.

"I…I…." Sookie hiccupped as though she were holding back tears. It was absolutely brilliant. "Oh Bill…." She sobbed into the phone, her voice catching again. "Bill he left me again!"

"Eric?" Bill supplied.

"Yes." Sookie replied, nodding her head even though Bill couldn't see it, completely submerged in her deception. "When he brought me back with him, I thought it meant he wanted us to be together again. But he left again two nights ago, even after I begged him to stay. He told me…." She broke off again and there were more pretend sobs. "He told he couldn't do anything to jeopardize his position with Freyda.

You were right Bill, you were right all along. You told me he'd leave me as soon as something better came along but I didn't believe you and now…!" This time she sounded as though she'd expended all her energy telling him her dreadful realizations and her tears were quieter.

"Oh Sweetheart." Bill crooned, his voice filled with compassion and sympathy, though Eric thought he wasn't imagining the tinge of satisfaction underneath.

"Bill I know there's been some bad moments between us in the past, but you told me once you would always be there for me if I needed you. I just…I could really use a friend right now." Sookie whispered, as though she were a lost little girl.

"Darlin', I'm sorry for you, truly. But even if Eric has left, you aren't alone there." Bill's voice was uncertain as he spoke, as though he wanted to come rushing to her, but still didn't understand why she was turning to him in the first place.

"It feels like I am. There's Pam, but…well, Pam is Pam. She's so proud her Maker has risen so high and she doesn't understand why I don't just snap to and get with the program. She's angry at me for asking too much of Eric." Sookie's voice took on just a hint of hurt and resentment at that, as one would expect when family failed to take your part.

"I can get away tomorrow night for a few hours if you'd like to talk." Bill said after a long pause. "You know I would do anything to help you Sookie…even now."

"You mean now that I've destroyed myself …for him." Sookie sobbed again.

If Eric weren't in the room with her, seeing how her expression didn't match her tone and feeling how her feelings were the complete opposite of what she portrayed, he would have been completely convinced.

"Darlin' don't say that." Bill interjected. "You have always been so innocent. He took advantage of you." He added after a moment.

Sookie looked up and pantomimed a 'slam dunk', before clearing her throat and pretending to be heart stricken again.

"Thank you Bill, really. I know it's wrong to ask you to be my shoulder to cry on, but the truth is, since I got my memories back, I've just… I've missed you a lot!"

It was a particularly cruel thing to say and Eric couldn't help it when he felt his pants tighten a bit. They made plans to meet the next night just after sunset, Sookie thanking Bill over and over.

When it was done, she leaned back in his chair and took a cleansing breath. They stared at each other for a moment before Eric walked around his desk and hauled her into his embrace again.

"You are amazing." Eric said, before kissing her hard, his possessiveness getting the better of him.

"Yeah, I'm an amazing liar." She answered back, her voice toneless.

"Compton has much to pay for, Lover, as does Victor. You should not feel guilty for doing anything which ends them." Eric's voice was hard as he said it, but when she looked up at him, something he couldn't place swimming in her eyes, he felt himself soften, wanting to comfort her.

"I don't. That's what bothers me so much."

"You are not bad or evil for defending what is yours Sookie. Felipe, Victor, Bill they all wish to separate us and use us for their own purposes. I know you are…conflicted with yourself, but I do not believe you should be. Would your Grandmother have let anyone harm you, or take you away from her?"

Sookie had seemed to be processing what he said with equanimity until his last question. When he mentioned her Grandmother her head shot up and her face seemed to contort in pain.

"No, of course not, but she wouldn't have killed those people either." She answered hotly.

"Would she not? If they came into her house, broke in during the night determined to hurt you, would she not have taken any measures necessary to protect you?"

Sookie looked down at her feet. It was only the movement of her hair that told him she was nodding, reluctantly, in agreement.

"Yes, she would have. Gran always said a woman could do anything she had to and I know she would have killed to protect us, if she thought it was the only way." Sookie's words were quiet and she still refused to meet his eyes.

Taking her chin between his fingers Eric tilted her head up and gazed at her in that intense way he had, that made her feel as though he were practically looking through her.

"This is the only way Lover. Felipe and Victor and Bill too will not stop, they will not be deterred by lesser means. Ending them is the only way."

"I know." She whispered, and he finally felt something like acceptance take root inside her.

"I thought for a moment I had lost you again." He said unexpectedly, his heart contracting painfully at the thought.

"I'm sorry." She answered him. "I can't believe how naïve, how easily manipulated I was by him. I truly thought you were wicked. He tried so hard to make me believe you were the devil himself and, for a while, I believed him. But Eric, I didn't think those things for long. We hardly knew each other then, but it didn't take me long to realize there was so much more to you than Bill wanted me to see."

"When?" Eric found he couldn't help asking. He'd loved her since Jackson, but he was almost sure, for her, it had come a lot later.

"I _knew_ I loved you the night you woke up in my house and didn't remember the time we'd spent there together, but…," she paused, looking down for a moment, seeming to search her heart, "…I think I felt something like love, or close to it, that night in Jackson.

Even injured and weak and desperate to sleep, I couldn't stop myself from wanting you. And when I took your blood and realized you'd given it to save my life…it was only the fact I hadn't ended things with Bill that kept me from telling Bubba to take a hike." She smiled up at him then, her eyes twinkling with mischief.

Eric smiled right back at her. Something in his heart felt as though it had mended, hearing her say she'd taken the first step to loving him the same night he had.

"I started for me that night too." He whispered as he cupped her face between his hands.

"Yeah?" She replied, her voice sounding a little stunned.

"Yeah."

His lips crashed down on hers then and for the remainder of the night there were no more words. She would square off with Compton tomorrow night, play cat and mouse with him and hope his mind had something worth the danger.

He would be somewhere near by ready to pull her back if it became necessary or to protect her if the need arose. But for the rest of tonight, they could afford to ignore the world and all of its pressing concerns and just be two people who'd already fought and wept and bled to be together.

Two people who deserved to be loved.


	28. Chapter 28

_**A/N:**__ Thanks as always to everyone who continues to follow this story. We've got two chapters left after this one and then we're done. _

_And of course thank you so much to my beta, the Grand Puba of all betas, __**Northman Maille**__! She did so much work on this chapter, you can't even imagine!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing….._

_Ready to play with Bill? _

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They'd gone to rest in Bon Temps after their tumultuous night of telepathy practice, basking in the glow of all the love they'd made, and holding each other close as death took them. But when Sookie woke the next night she was alone.

Looking around the room, she saw no note, nor was there was any indication Eric had been there only an hour before. Nothing except the scent of him, which still lingered on the sheets and pillows beside her, attested to his recent presence.

She could feel him close though. She suspected he'd used his ability to rise earlier than both her or Bill, to make sure he was out of the house, somewhere nearby but well hidden, in case Compton had rested closer to Bon Temps than to New Orleans.

Showering quickly and changing into some of the old clothes that still hung in her closet, Sookie attempted to make herself look as much like her former, Human self as possible. She even used her ancient flat iron to straighten her hair, the way she always did for special occasions.

As she stared at herself: dressed in what had once been her very best pair of Wal-Mart brand jeans and a thin, light blue, crocheted sweater that clung revealingly without being slutty, she figured she was as close to being the old Sookie Stackhouse as she was ever likely to get.

It didn't escape her notice, once again, she didn't feel right as this person. But she hoped, that Bill, seeing her like this, would be more inclined to believe she regretted the decision to let Eric turn her.

Two hours after sunset the sound of gravel crunching outside alerted her to Bill's arrival. Taking one last moment to smooth her hair and clothes, and making sure to appear as dejected as possible, she made for the front door. Pulling it open before he was even all the way up the porch steps, she greeted him with a tentative smile.

"Hi Bill, come on in." Sookie said with a flourish of her hands. Pretending to suddenly realize such an invitation was completely unnecessary, she laughed as though she were feeling shy and uncertain. "I guess I don't really need to do that anymore…force of habit."

She heard Bill chuckle as he crossed the threshold, the sound forlorn.

"No, but it's nice to hear you welcome me in anyway, Sweetheart." He answered.

When Sookie looked up at him, her face hesitant, she saw a small, sad smile turning up the corners of his mouth.

"I'm real glad you're here Bill. Thank you for coming." Sookie gestured for Bill to take a seat on the couch as she settled into her grandmother's overstuffed armchair.

"I'm glad you felt you could turn to me Sookie. I meant what I said all those years ago. I will always help you in any way I can. I hope you understand my only intention, when I brought Victor to Fangtasia after you were turned, was to help you.

I could never imagine you willingly choosing this life, and when Sam came to me, upset and panicked, I went to Victor because, if it were true, only a Vampire superior to Eric would have had the power to remove you from his influence. The Humans might have laws about unwilling turnings, but I think we both know one as old as Eric is hardly bound by Human authority.

It was only after Eric killed Sam, and I knew I'd be next, that I chose to seek protection where I could. With Victor I was safe from Eric, but close enough to come to your aid if you needed me. All I have ever wanted was to be of help to you."

Sookie listened to Bill's speech with a numbness in her heart. She had no doubt he was being truthful with her, but it only reinforced her belief that Bill had never truly understood her, or Eric, or even himself.

He always assumed the worst of Eric, that he was dangerous, that he wished to use and manipulate Sookie, that he was incapable of genuine feeling and therefore unable to truly love her, while thinking the best of himself.

Every wrong Bill had ever committed could be explained away in his head as the fault of someone else. He'd manipulated and deceived her because of the Queen. He'd pensioned her off, like a piece of furniture to be traded around, because of Lorena. He'd betrayed them to Victor because of Eric.

And when he couldn't pass himself off as the victim of other people's cruel machinations, he dismissed his faults as momentary lapses beyond his control: like raping and nearly draining her in Jackson. Even that wasn't his fault, because he was a Vampire and unable to stop himself.

All of that was like water under the bridge to him. And now he sat here wanting to help her, like an 'old friend', because in his mind he'd never really done anything but be her friend, except when stronger people forced him to do otherwise. Which of course she was obliged to forgive him for.

"I know you meant well Bill." She said truthfully.

"Did you really want this Sookie?" He asked her with a look of uncertainty in his eyes, as though he was both dying to know and afraid of the answer all at once.

"I did." She answered back honestly, her voice steady.

"Why?" He asked, looking over her with such sadness.

"I love him Bill. I love him and I know he loves me. When I looked around, all those years ago, I realized I had two options. Watch everybody around me die and probably die myself, either from old age, or more likely at the hands of one of the people who always seemed to be after me. Or…take a chance on finding forever with the man who'd always loved me. I won't say it was an easy choice, it wasn't, but I never regretted it… not until two nights ago." She added the last with sniffle, and a hand clasped quickly over her mouth in pretend anguish.

"Then I'm very sorry for you. Eric is certainly not a cruel Maker, but given your expectations I can understand how heartbreaking all this must be for you. The fact remains though, Sookie, he is your Master now. Unless something were to happen to him, you will be bound to him for the rest of your existence."

"I know." Sookie said, nodding her head and letting a little tear slip from her lashes. "I just… I needed to talk to someone who would hear me out without berating me for it. Like I told you, I tried to talk to Pam and now she's angry with me… and I certainly can't turn to any of the other Vampires in the area…." Sookie just trailed off there, knowing Bill would surmise that it left only him for her to seek out.

"Of course." Was all he said, as though he believed he was the only one who would understand. "Does Pam need you for anything here?" He asked her after a moment.

"No," Sookie shook her head, scowling a little since she was supposed to be miffed at Pam, "she's barely speaking to me right now, actually."

"Then why don't you come to New Orleans for a little vacation? I could show you around. A little change of venue might be just what you need to clear your head."

As Bill began extolling the virtues of New Orleans, and the improvements Victor, but most especially_ he_, had made to the once ravaged city, Sookie closed her eyes briefly. Gathering the concentration she needed, she pulled her shields back slowly.

There was a moment when Sookie felt a spike of fear, afraid all the voices would again crowd in on her, and all the snakes would start to slither over her body, but it didn't happen. Eric had been right, her farmhouse was very, very secluded. The only minds she felt were Bill and Erics.

Her bonded was perched in one of the tall trees at the border of the woods. His chosen spot gave him the perfect vantage point to see into the living room, and he was watching her pretend to be fascinated by all the excitement to be had in the romantic city.

Sookie brushed Eric's mind quickly, giving him the mental equivalent of a kiss… before turning her attention where it belonged.

Bill continued to ramble on about how wonderful New Orleans was now as she dipped herself into his mind.

What she found there wasn't surprising. Bill had spoken to Victor before leaving and he was under express orders to get her to come to New Orleans with him. Bill believed Victor would welcome her and no harm would come to her, but he also hoped she would be willing, given her current state of estrangement from her Maker, to give up information about Eric and the Queen of Oklahoma.

Just as she hoped to use Bill, so he hoped to use her. And again, even as he did it, he didn't believe there was anything wrong with his actions. If anything he believed whatever Victor got from her would help free her from Eric: therefore saving her from the Vampire who'd stolen her humanity, her most precious asset in Bill's estimation, and making Bill her hero.

Digging deeper than his immediate thoughts, Sookie watched Bill's life play out before her like a movie. His childhood spent learning to harvest the land he now lived on once again. Meeting and falling in love with his wife. The horror of the war, strange and disturbing snap shots of men screaming in agony, missing limbs and bodies rotting out from infection; images of young men and boys blown to bits in front of other's eyes. And with them the sensations of suffering, hunger, and cold… so vivid and terrible they were even unsettling to a bloodthirsty, death jaded Vampire.

She saw Bill walking the endless miles home to his family, reuniting with them, trying to put the horror of those five hateful years behind him, only to catch the attention of Lorena and wake one night a Vampire, bound to a mistress even viler than the war.

Sookie saw Bill's time with Lorena, the horrible things she'd made him do, which he both loathed and loved at the same time, emotions similar to his feelings for the woman who'd reduced him to it. She saw him given his freedom and sent out into the world on his own.

She saw his time at Sophie-Anne's court and his meeting Hadley, eventually being given his assignment to find her, and how he'd loathed a job he deemed beneath him. Their meeting, and courtship followed. Mixed in with the pictures, Sookie could sense Bill's feelings about her, which had originally amounted to not much more than tolerance and mild indulgence.

As Sookie watched it all play out, she realized Bill had never loved her when they were together. It wasn't until she rescued him from Russell's barn and staked Lorena, that he truly felt anything for her beyond trite affection, the kind one gave to an over active but cute puppy. And as she watched their interactions afterwards, she realized Bill had never really loved her _at all_, no matter how loudly he'd shouted it after their break up. What he loved was the idolized version of her he'd created in his mind. The Human so brave, so filled with goodness she could bring light to the darkness, and rekindle his humanity by shining some of her own on him.

Finally she found what she was looking for; his time with Victor. And when she started to delve into that part of his memories, she found more than she could have ever hoped for. It would be even easier to frame Victor and Bill than she'd dreamed.

Just as she thought this, Bill finally seemed to run out of things to say, and he looked at her expectantly, as though he were waiting for a reply. Pulling out of his head and putting her shields back up quickly, but without issue, Sookie put on a weary smile.

"Maybe you're right Bill." She said, trying to sound guardedly hopeful.

"So you'll come?" He asked as though he were merely wishing to spend some time with her, hoping to cheer her up.

"Bill, it sounds lovely, but can you give me a little time to think?" Sookie's eyes were earnest and she saw Bill smile softly, happily at it. He was so sure he'd swayed naïve and gullible Sookie yet again.

"Of course, I have to return tonight, but may I call and check on you tomorrow evening?" He asked, rising from his seat.

"I'd like that."

Once Sookie had showed Bill out of the house, she shook herself out the way one might after a bad dream. She was just pulling off her tearstained sweater when she felt a rush of wind.

Turning, in nothing now but her jeans and bra, she saw Eric standing in the entryway between the kitchen and the living room. He took one long, appraising look at her, from the tips of her candy pink polished toes to her cheeks streaked with blood tears, before striding to her in three long steps and hauling her into his arms.

Eric's mouth came down possessively, claiming her lips as one hand tangled into her hair and the other grabbed covetously at the curve of her bottom. She barely had time to register what was happening before he pulled away slightly to lick her face clean of her tears.

"You are amazing!" He said as his tongue took long swipes at her cheek, as though it was his very own, private lollipop.

"Well thank you! Care to tell me why?" She answered back, her words more moans than sentences.

"Did you not do it on purpose?" He asked, pulling away completely this time, a look of bewilderment on his face.

"Honey, I honestly have no idea what you're talking about." She replied, her own bewilderment plain.

"You brushed my mind before you turned to Compton." He explained.

"You're this excited cause I gave you a little telepathic kiss?"

It was clearly not all adding up for her and she wished her beloved bonded would simply spit it out. He must have sensed her need for him to come to the point, because his next words where nothing if not enlightening.

"I enjoyed the 'kiss' but no. When you touched my mind and then delved into Compton's, it was as though you connected us somehow. I saw everything you did. It was extraordinary, though I fear I may never be able to maintain an erection again after seeing Compton and Lorena fuck.

Sookie was struck dumb for a moment as she considered everything he'd seen, especially the parts of Bill's brain that had to do with her. But her worry and distaste were washed away when he pulled her close again.

"Compton is a fool not to have been grateful when he had you, and an idiot to think he will ever get you back. His end is a favor to every animate creature on this planet." Eric paused a moment to brush his lips against Sookie's. "I cannot erase the pain he has caused you, but I swear I will never take you for granted in any way." He vowed.

Sookie could only smile, and for the first time all night it was genuine.

"You never have." She assured him.

It was still early in the night, but it didn't stop either of them from making their way to their room, stripping off their clothes, and climbing into bed. They had scheming and plotting to do, but as with everything else between them, it just felt better naked.

When they were both snuggled under the covers, Eric just resting between her thighs, his weight held up by his elbows as they caged her underneath him, Sookie couldn't help but giggle.

"You were just kidding about the erection weren't you?" She asked playfully.

It felt good to laugh after what she'd just seen and done and she felt ever more love and gratefulness to her mate, that he was always so willing to let her poke fun at his expense if it could lighten her mood. Eric was truly nothing like Bill tried to paint him, and she wished, feeling genuinely forlorn for the first time tonight, she'd figured that out a great deal sooner.

"Of course!" He bucked his hips forward rubbing his already plentiful graciousness against her slit. "I'm merely demonstrating my impressive restraint by getting the talking out of the way before the fucking commences…. I am picturing Lorena giving it to Bill though, to keep from losing focus." Eric might have been laughing as he said it, but there was a look of sincere disgust on his face, as he remembered one of the more horrible episodes they'd seen in Bill's head.

With a Maker like that harridan bitch, Sookie could feel something akin to sympathy for her first lover, even if it would do nothing to save him in the end.

"So, the plan?" She prompted Eric, not wanting to dwell on Lorena and how she'd twisted someone who was once a good and decent man.

"You know how I love a good fight….." He began grimacing slightly.

"Mmhmm." Sookie nodded. "I seem to remember watching you bowl for Vampires once, yes."

"Well, I'm not sure we're going to get one this time." Eric's voice was absolutely stricken sounding and Sookie knew he was being one hundred percent honest.

"I am correct in interpreting what I saw in Bill's head to mean Victor is embezzling large amounts of money from the state of Louisiana, without Felipe's knowledge?

Sookie nodded her head again.

"That's what it looked like to me too." She confirmed.

"Then I think we don't try to make this any more complicated than it has to be. I think we should use the good King of California against Felipe, since with the tensions between them, Felipe is likely to believe just about anything that has California's stamp on it." Eric was silent for a moment allowing Sookie's mind to catch up to him.

"So you think we should frame Victor so that it appears he's giving the embezzled money to the King of California to aid in a takeover?"

Eric couldn't help his smile of pride. She truly was a magnificent Vampire.

"In exchange for the throne of Louisiana as a… 'return on investment' upon Felipe's final death."

"And how do we do that?" Sookie asked after a long moment.

"With little bloodshed, regrettably. We falsify the documents, plant them and then let someone loyal to Felipe find them, and turn them over to the King. If done correctly there should be nothing to link us to the deed." Eric looked downright annoyed as he said the last and Sookie could sense he felt more like an accountant than a warrior right now.

Vaulting up, Sookie wound her arms around Eric's neck, letting him support the full measure of her weight, as she kissed the aggravated line, which had formed between his brows.

"Oh, my poor baby," she soothed, with more kisses down his nose, "cheer up. When Felipe comes to get rid of his treacherous lieutenant you'll get to lop some heads off, I promise."

"The question is how do we plant them, who do we want to discover them, and how do we make sure this person does?" Eric pressed forward, even as bent his head and began nibbling at her jaw.

Sookie wanted to laugh, but she was suddenly feeling much too horny to manage it. They were Vampires, she mentally shrugged. She shouldn't be surprised plotting the downfall of their enemies was getting them both hot and bothered, even without the possibility of gratuitous bloodshed.

"Mmm," she groaned as Eric began to lick the vein under her ear. "I can answer all of those questions for you." She said.

Turning her head to give him better access to her throat, Sookie untangled her arms from his neck, sliding them down Eric's sides, until she was petting the 'V' like indentation leading down to his rapidly hardening cock.

"You remember Jonathan?"

Eric nodded, but couldn't spare his lips to make a more verbal reply, since they were too busy sucking on the shell of her ear.

"He's working as Victor's secretary now and Bill seemed to think he was mighty unhappy about the way Victor was handling Louisiana, although he hasn't figured out the embezzlement stuff yet. He's the one we want to find the "evidence". Sookie's thumbs where still rubbing up and down Eric's stomach, even as her other fingers began toying with the ash blond nest of hair at the base of his erection, teasing him with the promise they would venture further… but never actually doing it.

"Ahh, Sookie," He groaned, trying to maneuver his hips in a way that would force her hands to brush his aching hard flesh. "How do we plant it?" Eric panted out moments later, when he'd given up in frustration and redirected his energy to their plotting.

"I take Bill up on his offer and go to New Orleans." She answered, surprising him by bringing both her hands down suddenly and encircling his erection in a firm grip.

"Victor might want to talk to you, but he would be more of a fool than I thought, to let you anywhere near his office alone." Eric said, his voice completely out of sync with his words, as he smiled triumphantly down on her, while she finally began stroking him.

"Which is why I'll glamour one of his day people to plant the evidence, and then another to mention it to Jonathan and get him suspicious enough to go raid the safe." With that Sookie spread her legs wide and tugged gently until Eric thrust his hips forward, plunging his cock deep inside in one thrust. "_That's_ how you plant it." She teased, giving him a wicked grin, complete with mirth filled eyes.

"And again, I tell you… you are amazing!" Eric smiled right back as he began to move in a steady rhythm which had them both desperate to reach the blissful end.

"Hmm, so you've said." It was Sookie's turn to pant. "No more talking…just show me!" They were the last words spoken as Eric took her mouth with his, and gave her all the 'evidence' she would ever need that she'd chosen well, not just in her Maker, but in her life too.


	29. Chapter 29

_**A/N:**__ Thank you again to everyone who's continued to follow this story, and most especially to everyone who's continued to review. Your support and kind words mean the world to me as we start wrapping this thing up!_

_Thank you as well, of course and as always, so my SUPER beta __**Northman Maille**__. I would be eternally lost without her!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…_

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

Sookie drummed her fingers on the Corvette's steering wheel, in time to the tune on the radio, as she took the exit off the highway that brought her into New Orleans. It had been a week since she'd met with Bill at her house and, after nights of speaking on the phone allowing him to believe she was coming to trust and care for him again, she had accepted his offer to visit The Big Easy for some 'cheering up'.

Plans were nicely falling into place, and now all she had to do was plant the evidence Eric had spent most of the week falsifying and wait for Jonathan to find it and report it to the King.

She remembered with a smile how Eric had grimaced when he'd handed the fake ledger to her. She knew he was longing to lop some heads off, but she'd been impressed all the same with the meticulous and convincing job he'd done faking an entire book, which made it appear that for the last several years Victor had been funneling funds to California in exchange for Louisiana's throne… once Felipe was gone.

She only hoped the King would be persuaded by this little ruse.

Eric's idea to use good old pen and paper to frame Victor seemed sound since, if Victor were to keep track of what he was stealing, he wasn't likely to put it on a computer that could be easily hacked into by his enemies, or merely stumbled upon by others whose loyalty was more to Felipe than himself.

Besides which, Vampires seemed to come in only two forms: the technophiles who ate up any new advancement as though it were manna from heaven, or the technophobes who clung on to antiquated ways until they were forced to change. Since Victor seemed to be the latter, they were taking the gamble Felipe would believe the ledger was real.

As Sookie followed the GPS to the address Bill had given her, she hoped all was well at home. She'd left Pam in an excited tizzy earlier that night.

Freyda, though wanting to keep out of things officially, had sent her Vanguard to help them when the time came. After looking back on what she'd garnered from Bill's head, Sookie believed there might be a Sheriff or two disgruntled enough with life under Victor's boot to change sides too, if given the right incentive.

Pam had barely had time to say goodbye, as she was left in charge of putting together a small, covert army lying in wait to make their move against Victor and Felipe without raising the suspicions of either.

Pulling up to a wrought iron gate, Sookie pressed the buzzer.

"Sookie Stackhouse to see Bill Compton."

"He's expecting you Ms. Stackhouse. Just follow the drive to the garage, he'll meet you there." Said a bored but courteous voice before the intercom disconnected and the gates parted automatically.

Maneuvering the Corvette up the winding drive, Sookie suppressed a shiver.

This wasn't Sophie-Anne's old office building/Palace complex, but just the thought of meeting Bill in New Orleans brought back all sorts of disturbing memories.

She'd always wondered why he never delivered her to Sophie-Anne as he'd been instructed to. Certainly any good Vampire learned the art of patience in their decades on earth but, had she been Sophie-Anne, she would never have waited so long, or allowed Bill to mess things up so spectacularly.

It was a blessing of the highest order that the reemergence of her telepathy was a closely guarded secret. She had no doubt in her mind that Victor would be wanting a great deal more from her than information about Eric and Freyda, if he knew what was standing in front of him.

Pushing her worries down, Sookie concentrated on putting on a genuine looking smile. She was still a few hundred yards from the garage complex when she saw Bill standing just in front of the open doors, waiting for her.

"Hey Bill!" Sookie said, attempting to sound bubbly.

"Hello Sweetheart." He answered back, giving her one of his cool, handsome smiles. "Pull on into the first row. I'll wait here for you." Sookie smiled back warmly and pulled into the first empty space. When she'd locked up the car she turned to find Bill chuckling. "You brought Eric's Corvette?" He asked sounding slightly shocked.

Sookie just shrugged.

"He never lets me drive it." She lied smoothly. "I thought it would serve him right if I scratched it up while on vacation with you. Sort of the cherry on top of my 'fuck Eric' cake."

Bill actually cracked a grin at her comment. and she could see his shoulders shaking slightly in silent laughter.

"We'll see what we can do about that. I'm sure if we take it out into some of the 'nicer' parts of town, you'll have no problem getting it keyed… at the very least." He answered as he gestured for her to walk with him.

Sookie tried not to flinch when she felt his hand on the small of her back, guiding her.

"You can't know how much I've missed your old, feisty self Sookie. When I saw you after you'd been changed by Eric, when you didn't have your memories, you were like a completely different person. So savage, so utterly, insipidly devoted to Eric. I mourned for you Darlin'. I knew that wasn't really you, and I despaired we would ever get you back. Now you're restored and it almost feels like we have…a second chance."

Sookie had to repress the real desire to lower her shields and see if he was still just playing his part, or if he really meant it. Unfortunately, she was pretty sure she already knew the answer to her question.

No matter what, Bill had never given up hope she would fall in love with him again. Not after he'd cheated on her, raped her and nearly drained her, not after she'd fallen in love with Eric or bonded to him, not even after he'd been forced to admit the real reasons for coming back to Bon Temps. He'd always clung on like a dog with a bone, determined to believe that one day she would see he was the only one for her.

She wondered how he would feel when he discovered the savage, bloodthirsty Vampire he'd disliked so much, the one who was so 'insipidly' devoted to Eric, was the real her.

She was saved from slipping and biting back at Bill's insulting words when he stopped in front of a pair of lovely, intricately carved double doors.

"This will be your room." He said, opening one for her and ushering her in. "I'll let you get settled in and be back for you in a little while, so you can check in with Victor. Then we'll be free to enjoy the rest of the evening." Before Bill could turn to leave, Sookie stopped him with a hand on his shoulder.

"Thank you Bill, for everything." She said, going up on her tiptoes and kissing him softly on the cheek. "If you wouldn't mind, could you send me up a little supper? I had a True Blood before I left, but I'm feeling very thirsty. I don't want to venture into the city without feeding first." She explained sweetly, giving him the big innocent eyes she was sure she'd always worn when they were dating. She'd been so terribly naïve then… naive and woefully gullible.

"Of course Darlin', any particular type?" He asked.

Sookie just shook her head.

"Surprise me."

As soon as Bill was gone, Sookie made a sweep of the room, looking for hidden cameras, listening devices, or anything else suspicious. She found a single bug hidden behind the vanity in the corner of the room, but nothing else. She figured all of the guest rooms probably had one, but was relieved not to find anything else. Opening her window a tiny bit she tossed it out and then relocked the casement just as there was a knock on her door.

Sookie opened it to find a handsome man, about six feet tall, with sandy brown hair and nice brown eyes.

"Hi, I'm Greg." He said, giving her his most winning smile. "Mr. Compton asked me to come up and see to anything you might need."

"Please come in." Sookie stepped back making room for him to pass her by.

Locking the door, Sookie walked in front of her meal. Without waiting to be asked, Greg unbuttoned his shirt giving her a peek at his nicely muscled chest. It was clear he was looking forward to feeding her.

"Sit down." She ordered and he obeyed right away.

Straddling his lap, she sunk her fangs into him hard, making sure her marks were large and visible and began to drink. When she was done she licked his wounds once, just enough to seal them and then turned her head up.

He was very aroused and tried to lean down to kiss her, but before he could close his eyes she caught his gaze and took his mind.

"Thank you for the meal Greg." She said offhandedly, as she rose from his lap.

"You're welcome." He answered back, his voice devoid of any emotion.

"Now, there's one last thing I need you to do for me."

"Anything," came his sing-songy reply.

"Take this." She pulled out the ledger Eric had created and tucked it into the belt of Greg's pants before buttoning up his shirt. "I need you to keep it hidden until sunrise and once the Vampires have gone to bed, I want you to place it in Victor's safe." Sookie gave him the code to get into Victor's office and the combination to get into the safe.

"Before you leave Victor's office I want you to take one of the paintings off the wall and take it with you. It doesn't matter which one, but once you have it you'll wrap it up and leave the mansion." Sookie was almost positive if the guest rooms had listening devices the rest of the place would be similarly wired. But she was betting that though Victor wanted everyone else spied on, he valued his own privacy as though it were sacrosanct.

Once Greg was inside she wouldn't have to worry about anything he did there being seen or heard. She hoped, when it was discovered he'd broken into Victor's office, stealing the painting would seem as though it had been his purpose and Victor wouldn't think to look too closely at anything else.

"Do you understand?" She asked.

Greg just nodded his head.

"Good, once you have the painting, I want you to take it with you and get out of the mansion as quickly as possible. Run and don't come back Greg, your life depends on it." Before lifting her glamour, Sookie planted a false memory of the last few minutes, and then watched as Greg shook his head clear of her influence.

Taking his face between her hands, Sookie kissed him hard.

"Thank you for everything." She said, giving him a fangy smile.

Greg face turned puzzled for a moment as he searched for the memory of what he'd been doing for the last twenty minutes, but then he seemed to puff up with pride, believing he'd pleased her immensely with his prowess.

"If you get hungry again, don't hesitate to ask for me." He leered, getting up and leaving quickly like a good little donor.

Greg had barely left when Bill returned. Sookie made a show of patting down her hair and straightening her clothes as though she'd just put them back on hastily.

"Did you enjoy?" He asked, his face taking on a strange look, almost as though he were jealous and turned on all at the same time.

"He tasted wonderful and he has very talented fingers." She joked, crudely. "As for the rest, I wouldn't know. I wanted to make sure we had plenty of time to enjoy ourselves tonight and anything more would have taken up too much time."

Bill seemed both pleased and disappointed to hear she hadn't had sex with her donor, and Sookie tried to keep the smile on her face even as she felt her hackles rise at his disgusting presumptuousness.

He was planning on tricking or coercing her into betraying her Maker, he believed she was broken from Eric's treatment of her, and yet he still hoped to wheedle his way back into her affections. Before she'd been turned, the idea of something happening to Bill had made her deeply unhappy, even when she'd been angry and hurt by the things he'd done. Now her Vampire instincts had her nearly crawling out of her skin to put a broken chair leg through her first lover's deluded heart.

Bill led them up a grand staircase and down a long hall until they came to a large room, which had probably been a sitting room at one point, but which Victor was using as an audience chamber now.

"Ah, Sookie Stackhouse." Victor said with his most put on smile. "Bill said you would be paying us a visit but I have to admit I was doubtful. I am very glad to be wrong though. Please come and sit." Victor gestured to a set of couches separated by a coffee table, placed next to the huge marble fire place that dominated a large portion of one wall.

Sitting down at one end, Sookie stifled a shudder as Bill chose to sit directly beside her. Taking the couch opposite, Victor gestured to a servant and suddenly there were three wine glasses filled with blood being set on the coffee table for them.

"Sookie," Victor began, "I want you to know that Bill has told me all about the… problems you're having with your Maker. I was very sorry to hear it." Victor paused to take a sip of his blood, swirling the contents of the glass and studying it with a pensive air before continuing. "I know we haven't always been friends you and I, but I want you to understand that my issues where never with you personally. Now that you've come to see Eric as many of us do, I hope we can be friends. Perhaps we might even find some way to help each other."

Sookie nodded her head, silently allowing herself to look both surprised and intrigued at the same time.

"I'm not sure how much help I can be to you Victor. I've been away for a long time. I do know I'm not eager to go back home any time soon though, so I would be very grateful to stay for a spell and pass the time with Bill."

"Of course, of course my dear, you have my permission to visit the city for as long as you'd like. Bill be sure you show our dear Sookie all the sights." Bill nodded eagerly and patted Sookie's knee.

"I intend to, Victor, I intend to." They began to chit chat about little things here and there when a Human entered the room holding a stack of papers.

"I'm sorry to interrupt you Mr. Madden, but these need to be signed right away." He said, looking quite petrified to be interrupting.

Victor's first response was a put upon sigh, before he turned to Sookie with an apologetic expression. "Forgive me, Jonathan never lets me rest." He explained before pulling a fountain pen out of his jacket pocket and giving the documents a cursory glance.

Feeling as though she'd struck gold, Sookie realized the Human must be Jonathan's assistant. Knowing there was little time to waste, Sookie looked at Bill with an embarrassed expression.

"Oh I just realized I forgot my purse in my room. Bill why don't I let you and Victor attend to all of this and I'll just run up and get it, then we can head out." Sookie only waited for Bill's nod of agreement before zipping out the door.

Running at her top speed to her room and back Sookie returned just in time to see Jonathan's human leaving the audience room and closing the doors behind him. Pretending not to see the man, Sookie rushed out as he was turning to leave.

The human most definitely hadn't seen her and as she hoped he nearly crashed directly into her, stopped only by her arms which braced around his shoulder.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" The Human exclaimed, as caught Sookie the sudden, pungent odor of his fear. He'd clearly worked around Vampires for some time, and knew how much they hated being touched and most especially bumped into.

"Oh it's no problem at all." She said, calling on all the manners her Gran had ever taught her.

Knowing she didn't have much time and knowing there could be a camera or a device anywhere she smiled up into the Human's eyes and took his mind

"Jonathan needs to look in Victor's safe tomorrow evening at first dark. You've overheard Victor and Bill talking about something suspicious and you saw them looking at a small black book they hid away in Victor's safe when you entered the room. You're sure Victor is hiding something of great importance. Do you understand?" She whispered, her voice barely above a hiss.

The man nodded dumbly and a moment later Sookie freed him from her grasp.

"Thank you Ms." The human said again, unaware that he'd been glamoured and grateful he'd managed run into one of the few Vampires who wouldn't rip out his throat for such a display of clumsiness.

"Have a good night." She said, waving brightly.

Entering the audience room once more she found Bill and Victor deep in a conversation which immediately ceased the moment she stepped through the door.

"All set now!" Sookie said, smiling as she waved her purse for both men to see.

"Excellent." Bill replied and rose from the couch.

.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~.

Sookie had been in New Orleans for two nights when Bill took her on a tour of the historic Cemetery. He'd managed to play his old role of the perfect Southern gentleman to a tee and had been nothing but gracious and kind to her, even attempting to flirt a little, but Sookie could tell he was getting frustrated with her.

She hadn't given him any information he or Victor could use against Eric, and he was starting to lose his patience. More and more he didn't even bother to mask his questions but asked them pointedly followed by platitudes about how things could be better for her here in New Orleans, or insinuations that he would be more than willing to take care of her in Eric's place.

To each of them Sookie played dumb, but it wasn't a surprise to her on the third night when they met Victor at the head of the stairs, as they came in from an evening out. He had two Vampires flanking him and a playful expression on his face. Bill for his part, seemed to go a little paler when he saw them.

"Anything?" Victor asked without preamble.

"No, not yet, but I told you it would take time. You promised me more time." Bill answered back panicked.

"If she hasn't told you anything yet, than she isn't going to." Victor explained, as though he were talking to a particularly stupid child. Sookie would have laughed except he then turned his attention to her. "You see Ms. Stackhouse, when Bill told me you'd contacted him with your sad story I was deeply skeptical. You may have suffered some…issues in the past, but even when you were not yourself your loyalty and dare I say it…love for your Maker were obvious.

However, Bill seemed so sure you were in earnest, I allowed him to bring you here, in hopes that, if you were being truthful, you might be willing to divulge information I could use against Eric. Since you've given him nothing, I must believe my original suspicions are correct.

You are here for one purpose and one purpose only, to spy on me. It was foolish of Eric to send you, but since Compton is so easily misled, I don't suppose I can blame him for believing we're all that gullible. Gentleman, please escort Ms. Stackhouse to her rooms and make sure she stays there."

Victor's two goons took her by each of her arms and began leading her away.

"Oh and Sookie," he called out when they'd reached the top of the stairs, as though it was an afterthought, "you have until sunset this evening to decide to cooperate with me. After that I promise you'll find your stay in New Orleans a great deal less pleasant."

With that Sookie was promptly hauled off. The two guards tossed her onto the bed in her room and then locked the doors securely behind her.

Sookie could hear them outside her door and knew there was nothing to be done. She knew when they came for her the next night, she would have to pretend to be fearful, maybe even cry or plead for her release, but the truth was she was perfectly safe.

If Victor had suspected what she'd actually been doing here, he wouldn't have sent her back to her comfortable room, and he wouldn't have threatened her. He most probably would have locked her away in silver and tortured her, or simply tried to drive a stake into her.

No he was clearly still clueless of the real plot. Sighing she laid back on the bed and closed her eyes. For a brief moment she felt the bond flare with anger and then there was only soothing comfort, calm and love being sent to her.

Turning towards the window Sookie saw nothing, but knew he was close.

They thought she'd come to New Orleans alone. Smiling to herself, Sookie crossed her hands behind her head and laid back on the soft pillows, tomorrow Victor would be in for a lot more than he bargained for.


	30. Chapter 30

_**A/N:**__ Hi, I know today's not my usual posting day, but real life is kinda throwing me for a loop right now. My husband may lose his job tomorrow and if he does it will mean we have to leave Germany ASAP. We have movers coming to our house tomorrow one way or the other to start packing us up and so by Wednesday I may no longer have an internet connection._

_Since that's the case I wanted to post the last chapter of this story today and post the next chapter of my other story tomorrow, since after that I have no idea where I'll be or what my internet capabilities will be._

_So that being said, here is the last chapter of 'She's Not There'._

_From the bottom of my heart, I want to thank everyone who's followed this story and especially those who've reviewed. It made a thousand reviews, and I can't tell you how deeply touching that is. I sincerely cried that day, in a good way!_

_And I have to thank my beta __**Northman Maille**__. I can't put into words how much she means to me. 5 chapters into this story I found myself unexpectedly beta-less and she took me in off the metaphorical street and gave me the gift of not just her editing talent but her friendship. __**I love you Alison, so much**__! _

_Sorry for the oversentimentality. I'm gonna quit this ridiculously long author's note now and hope the last chapter is good for you guys!_

_**Disclaimer:**__ I own nothing…. _

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Sookie woke the next night to find Bill sitting on her bed.

It was one of the less pleasant ways she'd awoken in the last decade, and in her opinion it ranked right up there with the time she'd had to sleep in the ground... next the corpse of one Alexei's victims she'd hastily buried in the woods.

At least she hadn't been forced to talk to her companion upon rising that night.

"Sookie, there isn't much time." Bill said, a guilty look painting his features.

"Much time for what, Bill?" Sookie responded, sitting up against the headboard, trying to put as much distance between herself and her first lover as possible.

"For us to talk. Sookie, you must listen to me. If you know anything…anything at all about Eric or Freyda tell Victor now! He believes you're a spy and if you don't give him something he will torture you. If you tell him even one thing, anything, I know I can convince him to spare you all of this. I only want to protect your Darlin'." Bill's face was filled with remorse and pain, but Sookie didn't feel even a twinge of need to comfort him.

"I don't have anything to tell you or Victor, Bill. And frankly, you'll forgive me if I find it a little hard to believe you have any power to intervene on my behalf. Victor made it pretty clear last night; the only thing you're good for is bait. He wanted me here, and you got me here. End of story. I'm surprised he hasn't ordered you to run along and play while the big Vamps are busy."

Bill bristled visibly at Sookie's words and puffed out his chest.

"You have very few options right now Sookie. I suggest you don't turn your nose up at an offer of help from anywhere. When Victor is done with you, you'll wish you'd accepted my aid."

Sookie's first response was to arch an eyebrow and smirk disdainfully at Bill's words.

"I seem to remember another time you offered to come to my aid against Victor's possible harm. I told you then I'd rather be tossed out by Eric than taken in by you any night. Ten years later the tune's a little different Bill, but the rhythm's exactly the same." With that Sookie rose from the bed, grabbing her suitcase and making her way into the bathroom.

She doubted they'd give her enough time for a shower, but she'd be damned if she was going to face Victor in nothing but a pink, cotton nightgown.

When Sookie emerged from the bathroom ten minutes later, wearing a simple pair of jeans and a red T-shirt, Bill was no longer alone. There were four guards standing behind him, armed with swords.

"Sookie Stackhouse, I hereby place you under arrest. You will come with me now or bear the consequences of your refusal."

Smiling, Sookie nodded her head and was flanked on all sides by the guards, but when she passed Bill, she paused just long enough to correct him.

"Northman, Bill. My name is Sookie Northman." With that she let the guards lead her away.

Sookie kept her face neutral as she was led through the halls of Victor's mansion and down into the cellar complex below. She knew when she saw Victor she would need to pretend to be frightened of him. Any Vampire as young as she was would be expected to be fearful, if not downright hysterical, when faced with their first torture. For the moment though, Sookie just let herself be led by Victor's goons, listening to the calm and comfort being sent to her and confident nothing truly bad would happen.

The guards finally stopped at the door to a smallish room. Opening it she was pushed inside, to find Victor standing before a large table, fitted with silver manacles at each of the corners. Next to him was a smaller table with silver instruments neatly laid out on its surface.

Sensing she only had to stall for a few minutes more, Sookie began to struggle, grunting and snarling as the guards dragged her across the room.

"Now, now Ms. Stackhouse," Victor began when the guards had again subdued her, "none of this would be necessary if you'd just tell me what I want to know."

"I already told you Victor, I don't have any information. I haven't come here to spy on you. You can hurt me all you like but it won't change the truth!" Sookie's voice took on a pleading tone as Victor's fangs shot down.

He of course thought she was lying, and she could tell he was looking forward to the opportunity to break his enemy's beloved child. Sookie would bet that even if she gave him nothing, he would still enjoy hurting her merely for the fact it would enrage Eric.

"How predictable of you. They all say that at the beginning Ms. Stackhouse. I think you'll be surprised by how quickly you change your story." Turning to her guards, he smiled malevolently. "Strap her to the table."

One of her guards laughed under his breath at Victor's orders and Sookie felt slightly nauseous when she realized all five of the men in the room were beyond aroused by the prospect of hurting her. If it had gone on even a moment more she might truly have begun to be frightened, but suddenly, as though he were answering her unspoken prayers, Rasul appeared in the doorway.

"Victor, his Majesty has just arrived, he's upstairs waiting for you in your receiving chamber."

Victor gave his unexpected intruder an unhappy look, before turning to the thugs who were still trying to wrangle her onto the table.

"His Majesty is most prompt." Victor said, sounding somewhat puzzled. "I had hoped to extract a confession from you before he arrived, but no matter." Addressing her guards again, he continued. "Bring her."

Just as suddenly as she'd been thrown onto the hard table, Sookie was dragged back off and was again being led through the mansion.

They ended up back in the same room Bill had brought her to when she'd checked in four nights ago. The large fireplace stood empty this time and instead of being causally inhabited by a few of Victor's hangers-on, the room was positively teeming with royal guards, all wearing Felipe's colors.

In the middle of the mass of deadly looking Vampires stood Felipe, in his best cape, flanked by Eric and Pam.

"Majesty," Victor said, bowing deeply to his King as they came to a standstill. "I was not expecting you until tomorrow at the earliest. I have not yet had time to interrogate Northman's spy." If Victor was in anyway unsettled to see Eric and Pam with Felipe, he gave no indication.

"Sandy made me aware of your request I come to Louisiana earlier in the evening Victor. As luck would have it I was already on my way here, on _another matter_. Happily, it now appears I can resolve both problems at once." Turning to her ever ready guards, the King gave them an imperiously displeased look. "Release the Prince's child at once." He barked.

The guards parted for her without a second's hesitation, but before Sookie could make it to Eric's side she was unceremoniously grabbed by Victor.

Sookie could feel the absolute rage radiating off both Eric and Pam at the sight of Victor manhandling her, but it was only Pam who gave any physical indication of her rage: snarling at Sookie's captor and baring her fangs.

"Your Majesty I must protest. She was sent here, by Northman, to spy on me. She must be punished. They must both be punished!" Victor's voice had gone up just a little as he suddenly seemed to realize he had no idea what was going on around him.

"It is no crime to spy on a traitor Victor. Far from punishing her, if it is true, I intend to reward both Ms. Stackhouse and Prince Northman handsomely." With an evil glint in his eye, Felipe turned his attention on her then. "How would you like to be a duchess Sookie?"

Anger burst through her white and hot then, and Sookie knew it wasn't just her who was hanging on hard to control at the offer Felipe had just made. He was an opportunist of the highest order, perhaps even more cunning than Eric, since she was under no delusion he was attempting to pass off his sale of her to the Doge as some kind of reward for faithful service. Sookie knew she wouldn't have to wait long to give him a very definite answer, but in the meantime she was all too happy to let Victor interrupt her.

"Traitor? Felipe, I have no idea what you mean! I have always been your most faithful servant. I am no traitor." Before the King could respond, as though it had all been planned out for the maximum amount of dramatic effect, another voice rang out through the room.

"That is a lie." All heads turned to see Jonathan, standing in the doorway, a little black ledger clutched tightly in his hand. "I have the evidence I spoke to you about here, my King." Sookie hadn't seen Jonathan since the night he'd snuck up on her after the Bellefleur sibling's double wedding. He hadn't changed much, except she could tell just by looking at him that he was pleased beyond belief to be helping get rid of Victor.

"What is going on here?" Victor demanded, his voice taking on the first real strains of fright, as he watched his underling hand over the ledger.

Felipe ignored his Lieutenant in favor of opening the small book and examining its contents. By the time he got to the end, his fangs where clearly visible as they pressed up against his lower lip.

"How long, Victor? How long have you been going behind my back, siphoning funds for your treachery? Is there another one of these hidden somewhere? Has it been from the very beginning?

Of course Victor was still completely in the dark about what was happening around him, but at the mere mention of 'siphoning funds' his face went impossibly paler and he began to stutter and stumble over his denials. It was all the proof of his treason Felipe required and taking a long wooden stake, tipped in silver, from one of his guards, the King walked leisurely over to his former Lieutenant. As he did, the guards who had once been there to restrain Sookie took him by the arms instead.

"Victor Madden, I strip you of your title of Lieutenant of Louisiana, and condemn you to final death for your treasonous conspiracy with the Monarch of another territory to steal funds in order to aid in my overthrow."

Victor barely had a moment to cower before Felipe sunk the stake deep into his chest and Victor's body crumbled to pieces before them. In the excitement of watching Louisiana's most powerful Vampire fall from grace and meet the final death all in the space of a few minutes, no one had been paying any attention to Sookie, Eric or Pam. So when she'd made her way to stand on Eric's other side, it took very little artifice to hand her two long, sharp knives, her weapon of choice, also coated at the ends in silver.

Victor's staking was the signal, and Felipe had just pushed the wood through Victor's chest when Rasul, who had been standing with several more guards at the doors, set off the Mansion's alarm system and slammed the double doors closed, locking them from the inside.

Within seconds, half the guards had ripped off Felipe's livery to reveal they wore Freyda's colors underneath and a pitched battle began.

Felipe, realizing what was going on around him, turned and set his sights on Eric. With a deadly, fang filled smile Eric threw off his expensive looking, three quarter length, wool coat to reveal the ancient broadsword strapped to his back. As he unsheathed it, the sound of the metal sliding out from the scabbard was audible even over the din of shouting, and the clanging of weapons.

Pam was only too happy to take on all comers and she was already engaging two of Felipe's men at once when Sookie stabbed her initial opponent through the stomach. Turning him around like a ragdoll, she pressed his back against her front, bringing the sharp side of her knife blade to his throat. She used her heightened strength to cut his head away from his neck, before dropping the flaking corpse at her feet and turning to find the one person she wanted most.

She'd vowed on the night of Victor's Halloween party, years ago, that Bill would leave this world by her hand and hers alone, and it was time.

Bill was there in the corner, fighting two of Freyda's men. Smiling she began making her way to him just as he got the upper hand on one of his adversaries and staked him with a broken chair leg.

Bending low Sookie avoided the sword of one of Victor's Vampires and turned fractionally, stabbing him in the side as she came back up. Yelling to the guard Bill was still fighting, she instructed him to take care of the Vampire she'd just wounded. He looked confused for all of a second before shoving Bill into a wall and doing as he'd been bid.

When Sookie finally reached Bill he was picking himself up off the floor, a look of total bloodlust in his eyes. She smiled at him maliciously; he'd always been horrible at controlling his urges. She was over a hundred years his junior yet, she knew she was still in better control of herself right now than he was.

As much as Sookie wanted to finish him off then and there, she wouldn't stoop to preying on someone at a disadvantage, the way Bill always liked to. So with a nasty smirk she threw him one of her knives.

Bill looked down at the knife, startled, and for a moment it seemed as though he thought Sookie was trying to help him, but when she crouched down into a defensive position everything clicked into place for him.

"The book, you planted it didn't you? That's what you came here for." Bill snarled around his fangs.

Crouching low, to match Sookie's stance, he finally understood just who and what she really was, and how badly he'd misjudged and underestimated her.

Sookie only nodded. She had no intention of being pulled into a conversation that would distract her from her goal.

"Why? Sookie, all I've ever done was love you! I know things haven't always been well between us, but you have to know how much I love you!"

Sookie only snorted at Bill's words. Was he so delusional he actually believed what he felt for her was real love? If so he was far crazier than she'd ever realized.

"Yes, Bill, I felt so loved by you, when you began ignoring me after you felt you'd secured my affections. I felt even more love when you left me for your Maker and all but sold me to Eric to ease your conscience. Or maybe I should have been feeling your love when you raped me and nearly drained me. How bout when Eric forced you to admit your real reasons for returning to Bon Temps? Or maybe when you used poor Sam's fears to try and take me away from Eric? When you tried to get me to betray him? Or maybe just a few days ago when your lured me here to squeeze information out of me?"

Sookie and Bill circled each other as she wrapped off the list of his most atrocious betrayals.

"What about when I offered to die for you the night of the takeover, or when I saved you from the Fairies." Bill countered, the list of his few moments of goodness far shorter than that of his grievances.

"Do you think ANYTHING you've ever done could make up for lying to me to get me to fall in love with you, or RAPING me? Stop pleading for my forgiveness and start trying to save yourself Bill!" Sookie said, cutting him off with the first thrust of her knife.

Bill dodged the knife's edge, but he underestimated Sookie yet again because even as she lunged past him, she brought her foot out behind her and hooked it around his leg. Using her momentum she sent him hurtling to the ground on his stomach. Turning she vaulted up right quickly and dove for him. Bill tried to duck out of the way, but there was no room for him to move anywhere as he'd fallen between two other groups of fighters.

Landing on top of him, Sookie pulled back the hand that wasn't holding her knife. With every ounce of strength she possessed, Sookie punched through Bill's chest until her fist met the floor, before pulling his head up by his hair and holding her knife to his throat.

"Just so we're clear here Bill, I never have and never will forgive you." With that Sookie sent her blade through his throat until she was left holding nothing but his head in her hands.

Scanning the room quickly Sookie saw Eric bring Felipe to his knees and in one arching swing, take the King's head off. To Eric's side, Sookie saw Pam fighting two more Vampires. One of them she had a good handle on but the other was getting ready to run her through the side.

Deciding Bill could finally be a help instead of a hindrance, Sookie stood and brought the arm holding Bill's head back. With a pitch she silently thanked Jason for having taught her as a child, she managed to hit Pam's second enemy square in the face with Bill's head, sending him backwards, into the empty fireplace where Eric was only too happy run him through and take his head as well.

When the dust cleared, they'd only lost a few of Freyda's guardsmen, but all of Victor and Felipe's men were either dead or had willingly surrendered. There were still the sounds of fighting outside, but in another minute they died down as well, and there was a coded knock at the door.

Rasul turned the lock and threw open the door as four of Freyda's personal bodyguards strode in with the Queen herself at the center and the two Sheriffs who'd changed sides behind them. From their places around the room, Freyda's fighters and Eric's all went down on one knee, taking the few loyal to Felipe with them forcibly.

Seeing all was safe, Freyda's guards parted. The Queen walked through the room with a regal grace, stopping in front of Eric, who stood to his full height, handing her what remained of Felipe's head as a prize.

Freyda laughed musically as she took it.

"Do you think if I have it bronzed right away it will retain its shape? I'd like to use it as paperweight." Handing it off to one of her men she looked at Eric as he bowed low before her.

"The King has met his final death." Eric's voice rang loudly through the room. "Long live the Queen." The other's around them rose to their feet and began to cheer, chanting 'long live the Queen' over and over again.

When they were again silent, Freyda nodded her head in thanks to them all before turning to Eric once again. Her voice was low and soft, but not quiet enough that Sookie couldn't hear from her position halfway across the room.

"Are you sure?" She asked, placing her hand over Eric's where it rested against the hilt of his sword. "I would make you King… of all of it." There was a moment when Sookie was sure, if it could still beat, her heart would have pounded through her chest. She knew exactly what Freyda was asking _her_ lover! But just as his face remained a mask of calm indifference, his emotions never once waivered.

"I'm sure." Was his answer.

Freyda nodded her head and Sookie could see a single red tear making its way down her cheek.

"Very well. I always keep my promises." Raising her voice to match the strength of Eric's, Freyda completed the terms of their bargain. "Before these loyal and noble Vampires gathered, I, Freyda, Queen of Oklahoma, Louisiana, Arkansas, and Nevada absolve you, Eric Northman, of our vows and renounce my right to you as wife. Let all bear witness that you are free." Freyda finished her words with a defiant jut of her chin. Choosing to look out at the assembled crowd and dare any to contradict her decision, rather than show her pain and invite humiliation.

"You have been, in this as in everything else, honorable, upright and just. My sword is yours whenever you should have need of it." With that Eric kissed his former wife's hand and walked passed her, striding with determination to Sookie's side.

Seeing him coming to her, victorious and covered in the blood of their enemies after having chosen her over the right to rule four kingdoms, Sookie felt herself tremble with both need and love. They had just reached each other, the same glint of soul deep desire, twinkling in Eric's eyes when Freyda's voice interrupted them.

"Sheriff Northman." She called, causing Eric to turn, even as he pulled Sookie in close, melding her to his side.

"My Queen." He said, inclining his head.

"As you are a Vampire of your word, I am holding you to it right away. I have given you your freedom before witnesses, but I have not dismissed you from my service. I appoint you here and now as Lieutenant of Louisiana."

Eric had the good sense not to appear as dumbstruck as he actually felt and instead bowed low to his new Queen… and boss.

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As with any battlefield promotion, duties began right away. Instead of sneaking off to celebrate their victory in a soft bed, Eric and Sookie, along with Pam and the rest of Area Five's Vampires, spent the next two weeks consolidating their coup. Warrants were dispatched for those who needed to be brought to heel, and the herd was culled of those who would not transfer their fealty to the new Monarch.

Freyda left Louisiana in Eric's capable hands the night of the takeover, while dispatching a contingent of her men to Arkansas and taking off herself to secure her right to Nevada. It was unlikely anyone would challenge her, but she was smart enough to know any resistance to the new order of things would likely come from there.

In truth things went far more smoothly than any of them could have imagined. The Vampires of Louisiana were beyond thrilled to have Victor gone and there was almost no resistance to Freyda's elevation or to Eric's immediate control, the same went for Arkansas and even Nevada. Freyda's reputation as a just and honorable ruler had preceded her. After only one small and easily put down uprising in Las Vegas, she was readily accepted as Queen.

It was still another three and half weeks before things were settled enough for Eric to transfer the seat of power in the state from New Orleans to Shreveport, but five weeks after the coup they were finally home.

Pulling the 'Vette' up in front of the old farmhouse, Eric tried to get a hold of the nervousness that had been swirling inside him all night. It had caused Sookie to ask if he was alright more than once, but he'd only put her off with noncommittal answers and kept his eyes and his mind on the road.

Now as he opened the car door for her, he was met with a familiar raised eyebrow. He knew she wanted to question why he'd chosen to park the car in front of the house when it was still Stackhouse tradition to go in from the kitchen.

"That expression is far sexier on you than it ever was on Ocella." Eric laughed softly, bending to kiss the eyebrow she'd raised at him for the umpteenth time tonight.

"Eric, what in heck is going on with you tonight? You're starting to worry me." Instead of answering her, Eric made his way up the front porch steps. Opening the door, he ushered her inside, where her answer was waiting.

It was dark in the house except for the light coming from the fire which roared in the living room grate. To a Human it might not have been enough light, but it was more than Sookie needed to see Pam and Miriam standing on either side of it, bright smiles on their faces.

Before she could turn to Eric and question him one more time, he was beside her, his hand on the small of her back guiding her into the room.

"Eric…." Sookie pulled out his name, even as she pegged him with another questioning look.

"Lover." He answered, turning to her once they were standing in the middle of the room.

"Eric, I'm not gonna ask you again. What's going on here?" Sookie's hands went to her hips as she felt the last of her patience slipping away.

In response, Eric took her face between his hands and bent low, laying the mother of all kisses on her. It went on for long minutes, Eric's lips sliding against hers, his tongue playfully coaxing her fangs from her gums and then softly caressing them, all as his hands roamed her body, lighting a fire inside her that burned brighter than the one in the fireplace.

Eric finally pulled back when Sookie was at the point where all of his strange behavior during the night, along with their audience, seemed to fade into the background. She was still a little weak in the knees and her eyesight a little hazy when he pulled a knife she hadn't seen in almost twelve years from his pocket.

Taking a deep, unnecessary breath, Sookie looked around and suddenly understood what was happening. Before she could say anything though, Eric seized the moment.

"Lover, I know the first time I gave this to you, it was not under the best of circumstances and I know you were angered by my deception for a very long time. Yet still, when all was said and done you chose me. I have never before felt joy in such amounts as I did the night you let me turn you and became mine completely. Nor have I ever felt sorrow in such amounts as the night you rose without your memories, or the night Ocella forced us to end our marriage.

Through all of it though, I have loved you and no other and I know you have loved me in exactly the same way. I am hoping that love will allow you to agree to be my wife once more.

Be mine, Sookie, completely, as I am already yours."

At first Sookie couldn't make her mouth form words. There was too much emotion inside of her swirling around like a tornado, but the second she took her eyes off the knife and looked up into Eric's waiting gaze, everything became calm and peaceful once more.

He loved her truly. Of that she'd never had any doubt, but it felt almost as though her heart were beating all over again, to hear him _ask_ her to be his wife. She was already his child and his bonded, the truth of the matter was he had no need this time to bind her to him in such a way. He wanted it simply because he loved her and desired her to be his wife. And he was giving her the choice to accept or reject him.

Sookie felt overwhelmed by a rush of love as she looked past him to Pam and Miriam, both of whom were smiling in anticipation, and couldn't help but smile back. Eric really was the man she'd always been meant to love. Only he would understand that what had truly upset her the last time was not that she'd been cheated out of some big, formal affair, or robbed of her chance to wear a fancy dress, but that she'd been robbed of the choice. And he knew now all she would want was the chance to make the decision for herself and to do it in front of the two people who mattered most to them.

Without a word, Sookie took the knife gently from Eric's hand, and as she locked her gaze with his, she brought the blade to her lips and kissed it reverently, before putting it down gently on the coffee table.

"I have always been yours, even when I was too stubborn and blind to see it and I always will be. I love you, my husband." With that Sookie wound her arms around Eric's neck and pulled him into a gentle kiss filled with promises.

When they parted again they were both seeing stars. Eric smiled down at her, a look of total bliss painting his features for a second before sobering slightly and turning serious.

"I didn't know Freyda would appoint me Lieutenant." He began, his face taking on a dark expression. "I had hoped that after all this was over, we could come back here and spend a few decades simply loving each other. Now those plans are ruined."

Sookie rose up on her toes once more to give him another soft kiss.

"Not ruined, just… on hold. I guess it's a good thing we have forever, huh?" Her words seemed to bring the joy back into Eric's face and he kissed her over and over again adoringly.

"Forever with my wife." He breathed as he laid a final kiss in Sookie's hair. "That sounds… amazing."

"Forever with my husband, it's more than I ever dreamed was possible."

Eric laughed softly as he felt impatience coming from behind him.

"Than what do you say we appease Pam with a little celebration and then come back here and start making our ever after as happy as possible?"

Sookie could only laugh as she heard Pam snort from behind them. Looking at her little family she wondered how she'd ever thought forever would be lonely. Her eyes swept her sister and her sister's child before returning to Eric.

No, forever would never be lonely, not with Eric beside her. But forever might be just enough time to show him how much she truly, deeply and irrevocably loved him and the life she'd chosen at his side.


End file.
